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Q&A: What’s The Best Age For Your First Committed Relationship?

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Having a committed relationship can be challenging, and having a committed relationship over a long distance can be even more difficult. What is the best age for a committed relationship, especially for one over a long distance? Can long distance relationships really work? Here’s how you can give your relationship the best shot at success.

Question: I have a question on long distance relationships. I’ve been going out with my girlfriend for about 2 years now and we’ve been in a long distance relationship for about 6 months now. I live in Belgium and she lives in Canada. I’m 18 and she’s 16. What is your opinion on long distance relationships? Do you think we’re too young to have a committed relationship?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=94_x13rta9o[/youtube]

Too Young?

There really isn’t a “set age” for how old you have to be to be in a committed relationship. However, many teens are committing themselves to relationships with their partners before they’re even ready and this can often end in heartbreak. A person’s body – both mentally and physically – really isn’t ready to have a healthy, committed and happy relationship until at least the age of 26 and maybe even 27 or 28. Mentally and emotionally, we’re still growing before then. We’re still trying to figure out who we are and learning how to live in our own skin comfortably, and that can be difficult enough without adding another person to the equation. Getting into a committed relationship before you’re really ready – and have truly accepted yourself and grown into who you are as a person – can seem fine at first but can quickly turn disastrous. While some young people do have successful committed relationships, it is often not without struggle. Before you make a real committment to another person – long distance or not – make sure you’re really ready and don’t take the decision lightly.

Long Distance Relationships

Many people make long distance relationships work, but the most successful of these types of relationships are between two people have made plans to make the long distance part of the relationship a temporary one. Having an indefinite long distance relationship can be extremely difficult, and often doesn’t end well. If you haven’t already, consider making plans – even if that requires one or both of you to make some changes – to be together sometime in the not too distant future. The biggest hurdle you are going to face during a long distance relationship is not having any personal contact with your partner. Even a hug or a kiss makes a big difference in a relationship and goes a long way in making both you and your partner feel loved and valued. To make your long distance relationship work, make sure you and your partner are completely honest with each other. Having open and honest communication with your partner daily or as often as you can is the best way to try and keep your relationship afloat. Any dishonesty or a let down in communication will easily break the threads of the relationship, much more easily than if you and your partner were in a face to face relationship.

Q&A: Can I Get STD’s If We’re Both Virgins?

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If you’re a virgin having sex for the first time with another virgin, you may think you’re free and clear when it comes to STD’s. Unfortunately, being a virgin and having sex with a virgin is not a guarantee that you won’t contract an STD. Are sexually transmitted diseases transferred only through sex or can they be transferred other ways as well? How can you avoid contracting an STD?

Question: I’ve been going out with my boyfriend for 2 years now, what we usually do when it comes to sex is oral. He is my first and so am I to him. My question is if we are both “virgins” is there still a possibility either of us can get an STD or something similar?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l8gfvs9wkOs[/youtube]

STD’s And Sex

Many sexually transmitted diseases don’t require sex to be spread. HIV, AIDS and hepatitis A, B and C can all be spread through blood to blood contact as well as through contact with sexual fluids such as semen or vaginal fluids. Other less serious sexually transmitted diseases, such as crabs (pubic lice) or scabies, can be contracted from simple skin to skin contact (even a hug or handshake) although this is very, very rare. Many of these less serious STD’s are also transmitted from simple genital to genital contact, such as herpes, which doesn’t require any penetration or sexual fluid sharing at all to be contracted.

How To Make Yourself Safer

Sex is part of a healthy, happy and fulfilled lifestyle. Everyone craves sexual intimacy and contact with their partner and that’s completely natural. While the only way to be 100% sure that you won’t contract a sexually transmitted disease from your partner is to abstain from having sex with them, that is a difficult choice to make. If you want to have sex with your partner, take steps to make yourself as safe as possible before heading to the bedroom.

  • Get to know your partner, and know how many people they’ve slept with. Are they promiscuous, or a virgin? Is the probability that they have contracted a sexually transmitted disease fairly high or almost non-existent?
  • You can also request that your partner have a thorough STD test done by their doctor or local health department before having sex with them and offer to provide your test results with them as well.
  • Make sure that a condom is worn at all times to decrease the risk of contracting more serious STD’s such as hepatitis and HIV or AIDS. Oral sex can also spread sexually transmitted diseases, so make sure to use a dental dam for cunnilingus and a condom for fellatio.
  • Consider limiting the number of people you choose to have sex with, and give yourself some time to choose wisely. Choosing to have sex – even protected – with a variety of sexual partners automatically increases your chances of contracting a sexually transmitted disease

You can still enjoy sexual intimacy and closeness with your partner – even more so – if you choose to take steps to make sex safer for both you and your partner.

Q&A: Ladies – Masturbation And Your Period

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When teenagers and women begin masturbating, with it comes lots of questions. If you’ve begun having your monthly cycle or have been having your cycle and it suddenly stops in conjunction with regular masturbation, you may be wondering if masturbation is to blame for the disappearance of your period. Is this something that can happen, or is something else going on? Here’s what you want to know about masturbation and your period.

Question: If you masturbate, does it stop you from getting your period? If so, for how long?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h41GBNudhU4[/youtube]

Masturbating During Your Period

There is nothing wrong with masturbating during your period. It may be a little messy depending on how you like to masturbate, but many women enjoy masturbating during their monthly cycle and simply do so in the bath or shower. Masturbating during your period is also not harmful to your body at all and the stimulation can actually help loosen some of the tissue that is being shed so your body doesn’t have to work so hard to expel it. Many women report that having orgasms during their period help to lessen the pain of menstural cramps. Choosing to masturbate or abstaining from masturbationg during your period is simply a matter of preference.

Can Masturbation Stop Your Period

If your period has suddenly stopped, you may be wondering what is going on. If you masturbate regularly or have recently masturbated, it may seem logical to link masturbation to the change in your menstrual flow. Generally, the period doesn’t stop during or right after masturbation. In fact, masturbation often increases the flow of a woman’s period. But if you’re expecting your period and it doesn’t come, you might think that masturbation is to blame. You may also feel that masturbation could be to blame if your periods become irregular, or they suddenly become lighter or heavier than usual. The truth is that masturbation can’t stop your period – regardless of what you do or how you do it. It also can’t make your menstrual flow become irregular or give you a lighter menstrual flow.

Seeing Your Doctor

If you’ve stopped your period, or you’ve had a noticeable change in your menstruation, you need to think about some of the things that could possibly be the culprit here because it’s not masturbation. One of the biggest things that causes a monthly cycle to cease is pregnancy. Pregnancy can sometimes cause a cycle to become irregular, or simply just lighter than usual, although this is rare. Other things that could affect the flow of your period are hormonal changes and eating disorders such as anorexia. It is important to see your doctor if you’ve experienced a significant change in your menstrual flow, including a menstrual flow that suddenly becomes irregular or stops completely. There may be an underlying cause that you don’t yet know about that needs to be taken care of. There is no way to know what has caused the change in your monthly cycle unless you discuss the changes with your doctor.

Q&A: When She Says You Deserve Someone Better

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Asking a girl out, or telling a girl that you have romantic feelings for her, can be intimidating. If she returns your feelings, great. If she doesn’t, that’s ok too. But what if she tells you that you deserve someone better? What does it mean? Does she like you but have poor self esteem, or is she just trying to let you down easy? Here’s how you can figure out this difficult situation.

Question: What do you do when you tell her how you feel about her but she says you deserve someone better?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1KEj81BkQEM[/youtube]

She’s Letting You Down Easy

Sometimes women find it difficult to let a guy down if she doesn’t return his feelings. She doesn’t want to hurt him, so she finds a way to blame herself instead of just saying that she doesn’t have romantic feelings for you. This may be the case if you’ve revealed your romantic feelings for her and she’s told you that you “deserve someone better.” She may be too afraid to tell you the truth.

She Has Poor Self Esteem

Many women have poor self esteem and if she’s told you that you deserve someone better than her, she may really believe it. She may feel like she’s worthless, or that she doesn’t deserve a healthy, happy relationship. There are many reasons that a woman may feel this way and it has nothing to do with you. She may have had self esteem issues for years, stemming from childhood. It may have to do with her parents or an old, abusive boyfriend. It may even be more than one issue that contributes to her self esteem issues. Regardless of where her poor self esteem stems from, the end result is the same – she can’t commit to a relationship or even begin dating someone because she doesn’t feel like she deserves it. It can be difficult though, to figure out whether she’s telling you that you deserve someone better because she has low self esteem or because she’s trying to let you down easy.

Ask Her To Be Honest With You

The only way to find out what her true motivations are in this situation is to ask her to be truthful with you. Don’t be angry or critical – just be open with her and encourage her to be open and honest with you as well. Tell her that no matter what, you won’t judge her for whatever is going on in her life. Let her know that even if she doesn’t return your romantic feelings and that’s why she told you that you deserve someone better, you’ll understand and that you can be friends if she wants or nothing at all. If she truly has poor self esteem, it’s important to let her know that you want to be there for her and that she’s worth a good relationship. She may not respond right away, but showing that you care for her may lead to a friendship which may turn into a romantic relationship at some point when she feels ready.

Q&A: How To Shave Male Genitals

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Whether you want to shave or trim your pubic hair for yourself or your partner really wants to see you clean and smooth, shaving your genitals may seem like a daunting task. Cutting yourself in your most sensitive places is not something you want to do! Here’s how you can shave or trim your genitals quickly and easily without cutting yourself and get lasting, baby smooth results.

Question: Could you give advice on how to shave your male genital area without cutting yourself? I’m afraid if I use a shaving razor that I might cut myself and one of my testicles will fall out.

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqbcSCc-8lQ[/youtube]

Tools For The Job

To start, using a straight blade, a dull razor or just trying to shave quickly with soap and water (or worse, dry!) is going to give you less than good results. In fact, without the right tools for the job, shaving your penis can instantly turn disasterous. While your testicles may not fall out (you’d have to cut yourself really deep for that to happen) shaving without a good razor and shaving cream can give you a few nicks and a really bad razor burn afterwards. If you want to shave your genitals, or even just trim, invest a few bucks – you’ll be glad you did. You’ll need some trimmers (an electric beard trimmer is fabulous), a nice, sharp safety razor, thick and rich shaving cream and some lotion or aftershave.

How To Shave Your Genitals

  1. First, trim your pubic hair first, especially if it is long and curly. Shaving directly over the longer hair will only get hair stuck in your razor and you’re not going to get very much of the hair off.
  2. Next, take a shower or bath to let the warm water loosen the hair follicles. It will make shaving a lot easier and give you a much closer shave.
  3. When preparing to shave each area of your genitals, pull the skin tight. Loose skin will easily catch in a safety razor, resulting in nicks and cuts that you definitely don’t want. Pulling your skin tight will also help you get a closer shave.
  4. When shaving the base of the penis shaft, start at the top of the hairline and move down towards the base of the penis.
  5. Shave your scrotum last, again pulling the skin nice and tight to avoid nicks and cuts.
  6. After your shave, use a good aftershave splash or moisturizing lotion to keep your smooth shave and to prevent red bumps and razor burn afterwards.

Just A Trim

Another option for grooming your pubic hair is simply giving yourself a close trim, especially if you’re nervous about shaving it all off right away. Trimming is a lot easier than shaving, but will leave you with a “buzz cut” of sorts down there. When you prepare for shaving, trim your entire pubic region and see how you like it. You may prefer a trim to a close shave. You can always shave it off if you decide you want baby smooth skin instead. Some guys develop ingrown hairs after shaving – if you’re one of those guys, a trim might be just the ticket.