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How To Lick The Clitoris The RIGHT Way

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Oral sex on a woman can be tricky, because the clitoris is just so sensitive. Use these simple but effective techniques to lick your girl into an orgasm frenzy!

Why You’re Probably Licking Her Clitoris The WRONG Way

Most women respond well to clitoral stimulation outside the clitoral hood. The clitoris is often much too sensitive to handle direct stimulation. Many guys, however, go gung ho right on her clitoris itself, which can be really uncomfortable!

An outside approach works best – after all, the protection of the clitoral head is exactly what the hood was designed to do. There’s no need to go digging around underneath the clitoral hood with your tongue to find the head – this will only cause extreme discomfort and in some cases, even pain.

Don’t forget, however, that you must also develop a rhythm and keep it, especially close to orgasm. Keeping that in mind, let’s go over some of the correct tongue techniques in more detail.

We cover these tequniques in detail here: The Big Black Book Of Sex Positions

Sweeping Your Tongue Across The Clitoris

This move is great! It simply feels wonderful to a woman and should be a staple of any oral sex routine. It is a fairly easy move – position your tongue on either the right or left side of the clitoris and move from side to side as though you were sweeping a floor.

Clitoral Circles

This too is one of the best and most pleasurable clitoral techniques in cunnilingus. You’ll want to use this one a lot, because it can rarely get boring! The technique is somewhat self-explanatory – again, you’ll position your tongue either to the left or right of your partner’s clitoris. You will begin to move your tongue in circles, either in a clockwise or counter-clockwise motion.

This feels excellent when your partner is fairly aroused because it gives the clitoris plenty of stimulation outside the hood where it is well-received, but once your tongue gets to the 6:00 position on the “clock,” she will get a lovely preview of your tongue on her sensitive clitoral head – but not so much that it is uncomfortable.

Light Suction On The Clitoris

This is a move that is best performed when your partner is sufficiently aroused. Suction too early in the game may turn her off completely by putting too much pressure on her sensitive parts too soon.

You’ll want to take her clitoris gently into your mouth and lightly suck on it – much as though you were drinking from a straw. Remember; don’t get too rough with this move! This can be easy to do, so it is very important that you pay attention to your partner’s cues and movements. If she seems to be shrinking away before her orgasm, lighten up on the suction or discontinue sucking at all.

Remember Your ABC’s

You might have heard of this oral sex technique before, but then again, you might have not. This may quite possibly be the best technique out there, so listen up!

It may sound funny, but you’ll once again position your tongue (a pointed one works best here) either to the side or at the top of her clitoris and begin using your tongue to draw your ABC’s. Yes, you heard right.

This gives your partner a clitoral sensation similar to that of the circular stroke (most of the movement is performed outside of the clitoral hood while just a few strokes end up contacting the clitoral head itself) and simply feels divine to your partner. But wait a second!

If the sensations are really all that similar to the circular strokes, why even do the ABC strokes at all? Well, there’s the money question. The ABC stroke is as powerful as it is because it gives just the right amount of contact to both the clitoral hood and the clitoral head while mixing things up. You get the best of all the worlds – perfect contact, an excellent rhythm but here’s the rub – no two strokes are exactly the same. The different letters that you’ll be tracing with your tongue allow for enough variation to keep your partner guessing and on the edge – of orgasm! Very few men with sufficiently warmed up partners have made it all the way to the letter Z.

The Messy Eater

This is a tricky one, although it may not sound like it at first.

Basically, this move encompasses all the other techniques (such as tongue circles or gentle vacuum suction) but in somewhat of a “smorgasbord” fashion. You’ll want to use an oral sex position where you cradle both legs in your arms (her thigh will be in the crease of your elbow and your hands should come up around and rest on her hip bones) and…well, dig in!

This is a move where attitude really pays off – you’ve got to act like you’re hungry and you just can’t get enough of it. On the same token, however, you’ve still got to keep in mind that the clitoris is very sensitive and although you may be going at it like you’re at a pie-eating contest, you don’t want to go caveman on her and rough her up. Keeping a balance between the two is really what makes this move worthwhile.

Teach Your Man To Give You An Orgasm – In 1 EASY Move!

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Oral sex is hard for a guy to learn – or so you thought. You’ve been with guys that don’t know how to go down on you, and you’ve tried to show him the way but to no avail. Are these men a lost cause? Not hardly! Here’s how to show a guy how to make you have an orgasm, with one simple trick!

Tell Him You Wish You Could Give Yourself Oral Sex

The idea of licking your own clitoris may give you the creeps, but he doesn’t have to know that. Chances are, he thinks the idea is hot – even if it’s impossible. Next time you’re in the mood for your guy to go down on you, tell him that you really wish you could do it yourself. He’ll be intrigued and ask you why – and then you’ll tell him it’s because you know exactly what feels good. This will prompt him to say something along the lines of you teaching him how to do it the way you like – which is precisely what you want him to ask.

If he doesn’t ask outright for you to show him what you like down there, bring it up yourself. After you tell him that you wish you could go down on yourself, ask him if it would be alright if you showed him what to do. “Showed” is the operative word here – he’s been “told” before, probably more than once.

Kiss Him – And Mimic Giving Yourself Oral Sex

If he’s ready for you to show him how you want him to give you cunnilingus, kiss him deeply. When you kiss him, pretend that his mouth is your vagina. Think of his top lip as your clitoris and his bottom lip as your labia. Instead of kissing your partner the way you normally do, think about how you really might give yourself head. Mimic these maneuvers on his mouth. After a few minutes, he’ll get the hint and realize what you’re trying to do – and then start paying attention to exactly what you’re doing so he can do the moves himself.

If he’s not picking up on what you’re putting down, don’t be afraid to tell him. Some guys won’t get it unless you spell it out. So just say, “I’m going to kiss you the way I want you to kiss me – down there.” He’ll definitely be intrigued – he’ll want to see what it is exactly that you want. Plus, this kind of kissing is super hot on its own!

Think Of What Will Turn You On

As you’re kissing your partner, it’s time to think of all the different moves that you do while you’re masturbating as well as the moves other men have used to drive you wild. Think of exactly what you might want, and then use your tongue to do it to your partner’s mouth. For example, if you love to have your clitoris flicked with the tip of a tongue, do so to his top lip. If you’d rather he insert his tongue into your vagina, lightly probe your tongue into his mouth.

Keep in mind the order in which you do things. Try to do different techniques in the order you would like them done to you. He may or may not pick up on this – but if he’s really paying attention, he will.

Don’t Make It Too Complicated

Your guy isn’t going to remember a string of sixteen different things you did with your tongue. Make it easy on him by picking a few of your favorite moves and repeating them in order when kissing him. For example, start with super soft licking and sucking and then progress to flicking his top lip with your tongue to mimic him licking your clitoris. Suck on his top lip for a few seconds, then flatten your tongue out and broadly lick his lips from bottom to top. Then repeat this same set of techniques a few times.

Having only a few techniques to remember as well as the repetition is what will really drive it home and truly teach him what it is you like when he’s giving you oral sex.

Let Him Know When He’s Got It Right

When he starts going down on you, don’t just sit there quietly – if he’s rocking your world, let him know! If you say nothing, he’ll think he’s doing it completely wrong. When he does something right, gasp or moan loudly and shout his name. Make sure that it’s impossible for him to distinguish the difference from a really great technique and one that’s lukewarm.

7 Oral Sex Tips That Will Have Her SCREAMING Your Name!

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Oral sex is probably one of the easiest – and best – ways to make a woman orgasm. If you’re not skilled at cunnilingus and there’s another guy who is – even if you’re better looking – the other guy will win out again and again. So shape up your game with these seven oral sex tips – they are hotter than hot!

Slow Pressure

Make your tongue as broad and as flat as you can. Put pressure on her clitoris and lick slowly – like, very SLOWLY. Mostly what you’re focusing on here is the pressure and very little movement. Let up on the pressure say, to blow air on her clitoris, and then put the pressure back on again, still moving very little – if you’re licking, you’re doing it extremely slowly. You may not think that the pressure is doing very much, but this is a great warm up technique that will prime her for more direct stimulation.

Bottom To Top

A lot of guys skip over a woman’s entire vulva during oral sex, sticking only to the clitoris. While it is possible – and probable – that you’ll make a woman orgasm just by licking her clitoris, she’s missing out on the other incredible sensations that come with oral sex. Don’t ignore her vagina or her labia – instead, lick from the bottom of her vagina, slowly, all the way up to the top of her clitoris. You can come back down with your tongue again, or you can let up and start back at the bottom if you want to tease a little more. This will create intense sensations that she probably has missed out on before now!

Tongue Thrusting

Again, this capitalizes on the fact that most guys ignore the vaginal canal during oral sex. Well, you’re not going to. Instead, you’re going to thrust your tongue in and out of her vagina, mimicking intercourse. Don’t use this move when you first start going down on your lover – save it for when she’s really warmed up and craving your tongue all over her!

Spreading Her Wide

Next time you perform oral sex on your lover, spread her legs wide first. Sit her rear on a pillow so she is more comfortable, but make her aware that you want to see, touch and lick everything. Spread her legs wide and put your hands on them to push them away from you while you’re licking her. You can also spread her labia for more intense sensations on the clitoris and inner vaginal folds.

Enthusiasm And Dirty Talk

Enthusiasm is everything when it comes to giving oral sex. If a girl isn’t excited about giving you a blowjob, do you really still want her to? Okay, the answer is probably “yes,” but the point is that enthusiastic head is better than mediocre “let’s-just-get-this-over-with” head. Don’t hesitate to let your partner know how much you enjoy going down on her, and don’t be afraid to spice it up a little bit with dirty talk. Be vocal with plenty of moans and groans (most guys forget this and just expect the girl to make all the noise) and tell her what you’re going to do and how you’re going to do it. If you act like you’re really into it, her arousal level is going to triple!

Doggy Style

Chances are, your girl has never been eaten out doggy style before and if she has, it probably wasn’t all that often. This is a somewhat “taboo” oral sex position considering the man’s facial proximity to the woman’s anus, but if your partner is very clean or this doesn’t bother you at all (heck, it may even turn you on), then next time you give your partner head, tell her to get on her knees and bend over! She will love the naughtiness of it, and she’ll also dig being able to feel and hear what is going on but not have you in her line of sight at all.

Cuddle Time Afterwards

While women absolutely LOVE oral sex, there is something about it that disconnects her from her partner. It’s most likely because she can’t hold his body, kiss him or nuzzle his neck while he’s down south. Don’t get the wrong idea though – just because she really likes face to face time with you, it doesn’t mean that she’d rather forgo oral sex. Give her the best of both worlds by following up a killer cunnilingus session with lots of sweet and romantic cuddle time. This will reassure her of how much you care, and in turn, make her more open and uninhibited the next time around!

8 Sizzling Oral Sex Positions (For Her)

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Oral sex can get boring for women if she’s always laying down to receive. While oral sex is great in just about every shape or form, you can really heat things up with different oral sex positions. In fact, when your partner is going down on you in a variety of different ways, the same moves and techniques can actually feel totally different. Try these new oral sex positions to make him going down on you a lot more fun!

Standing Up

Guys will often get a blowjob standing up – but because a woman’s genitals don’t “stick out” like a man’s does, a woman doesn’t often get to stand while receiving oral sex. Next time your man goes down on you, suggest that he goes “up” on you instead! Stand over his head and let him come up underneath you to pleasure you with his mouth.

Variation: Prop your leg up on a table or a chair to allow him full and total access to your genitals. He’ll love being able to really see what he’s doing down there!

Down And Dirty Doggy Style

If your guy doesn’t mind being close to your back door entrance – or if he enjoys giving you analingus at the same time he’s going down on you – doggy style is definitely right up your alley. Kneel on all fours just as you would if you and your partner were going to have sex and he’s going to enter you from behind. Instead of penetrating you with his penis, he’ll actually bring his face down there and lick and suck you from behind. Seriously though, if your guy is back door shy, stay away from this one.

Variation: Have him flip over on his back and slide up underneath you, facing your genitals. He can give you oral sex this way, without being so involved with your behind.

Sitting With Legs Spread Wide

Sit up on a couch or chair and spread your legs as wide as you can, making your entire genital area open to your partner. Have him kneel down or sit on the floor, about eye level with your vulva. He can reach you easily this way, both with his mouth and his hands – which comes in “handy” for fingering. This is actually a very comfortable position for both you and your partner, provided that you’re both at the right level. If either of you is stretching up or hunched down to get in this position, try to find another chair or place to sit where you can be more comfortable.

Variation: Try spreading your vaginal lips with your fingers while your partner goes down on you. Not only will he love having full access to your lady parts, he’ll also love how unabashed and naughty this move is.

On The Side

This too is one of the most comfortable oral sex positions both for the giver and the receiver. Lie on your side on the bed or couch and have your partner lie upside down behind you. He should be facing your rear. Lift up the leg that is not on the bed and hold it high either with your hands or with some kind of restraint (which could be even more fun with a little bondage!) He’s going to slide his head in between your legs, bringing his face around to meet your genitals. He can rest his head and neck on your thigh while he eats you out.

Variation: Once he’s going down on you, release your leg and rest it on his shoulders. This gives him less access to your vulva, but it does give your leg a rest!

A New Twist On Oral Sex “Missionary”

The “missionary” version of oral sex positions is where the woman is lying down and the man lies on his stomach with his face buried deep in between her legs. While this is an excellent way to reach orgasm during oral sex – after all, there’s a reason it’s considered a “classic” – there are different things you can do with it to make it even more fun. After you lie down, bring your legs together and then raise them up, bringing your knees close to your stomach. Your legs should still be together. This allows your man to come up underneath your legs and lick your vulva. Have him bury his tongue deep in your folds, because light licking isn’t going to do the trick here with your legs pressed together.

Variation: Rest your legs on his shoulders when you get tired of holding them up. This will make it easier for him to go down on you, and it will be more comfortable for you when you get closer and closer to orgasm.

Sitting…On His Face

You’ve probably heard of this one, but it’s not played out just yet. Sitting on a man’s face is incredibly erotic for a woman, especially if she’s into domination and he’s into submission. After giving your man a blowjob with him lying down, crawl up his body and plant your genitals right on his face. He’ll love the idea of you grinding against his face while he’s eating you out.

Variation: Do a “reverse cowgirl” sort of move and face his feet instead. This is a great way to do it if you both love anal play, or at least don’t mind it.

On The Edge Of The Bed

You can use the edge of the bed during cunnilingus easily. The bed is a great tool to use if you want to get into different oral sex positions, because it’s height, size and shape is perfect. However, remember that you don’t always both need to be on the bed to utilize it. Have your partner lie down on the bed with his head as close to the edge as possible. In fact, he may need to scoot up enough so that most of his head is actually off the bed. You’re going to come in and straddle his face while standing!

Variation: Prop one of your legs up on the bed and lower yourself down onto his face. This may be a little difficult for you to do, but the end result is worth it! He’ll love the full view of your vulva above him!

The New “Woman On Top”

While sixty-nine is a great way to both give and receive oral sex at the same time, if a woman just wants to receive (or a guy just wants to give), this is probably not the way to go. Instead, the woman will lie on top of the man facing the ceiling, scooting her genitals up to his face. Her head will probably rest on or close to his penis, but this one is all about her!

Variation: Lift up your legs to expose your anus to your partner for anal play!

4 MORE Reasons Women Hate Blowjobs

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Oral sex can be challenging for a girl – there are many reasons why she doesn’t want to give you a blowjob. Here are four things that keep her from giving head.

1. Good Girls Don’t Do That

This one often comes from a religious or conservative upbringing where she was taught that giving head is a “sin” or something that “good girls” don’t do. And guys actually make this WORSE by treating a blowjob as the “holy grail” of sexuality or trying to PRESSURE her into doing it.

Getting over the “good girl” stigma is actually pretty easy. Just keep reading.

2. She’s Scared To Swallow Or She Doesn’t Like The Taste

I blame porn. A lot of guys have this unrealistic expectation that women should be EAGER to swallow. In the real world, women that really LIKE doing that are pretty rare (and treasured like the beautiful unicorns they are.) For now, I want you to take swallowing off the table completely. That’s not what we’re going for yet. Once you get more advanced you can learn some techniques for getting her to want to swallow and maybe even enjoy it. But you’ve got to crawl before you can skateboard.

3. She Thinks You’re A Hypocrite For Asking

She just might be right about that.

I can’t even tell you how many emails I’ve gotten from women saying “Mike, I give my husband slow, deep, wonderful blowjobs but he REFUSES to go down on me! What do I do!”

Plain and simple, if you want your woman to get into the idea of giving you oral sex on a regular basis (and really getting INTO it) you’ve got to be willing and EAGER to do the same for her.

Yeah, I know, some guys “hate” doing that, don’t like the smell, think it’s not “manly” or whatever. And my advice to you is to GET THE #@$@ OVER IT. If you want to get, you have to give. And you have to give REALLY well. So next time you and your woman are going at it, kiss your way down her stomach, pray to whatever gods you worship and get to work. It’ll be worth it, I promise.

4. She Doesn’t Think She’s Any Good At Oral Sex

This is actually huge.

When I was doing my research for this training I heard from woman after woman that one of the biggest reasons they didn’t like giving head was because they didn’t think they were any good at it.

Fact is most women have “low blowjob self esteem” and are petrified that you’re going to tell them what they’re doing “isn’t as good as your ex girlfriend” or “ doesn’t measure up in some way.”

(Tangentially, this low self esteem is a huge part of the “sex problem” I see in so many relationships. The woman doesn’t feel truly sexy, desired or “good” at sex, so she takes it off the table. This sometimes happens due to no fault of the guy at all.)

A huge part of what you need to do is to start BUILDING up her sexual self esteem (both around blowjobs and around sex in general.)

It won’t take long and your woman will feel worlds better about her ability to please you, will actually ENJOY giving you head and will actually have improved her sexual skills by leaps and bounds.