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You are here: Home / Archives for loveandsex

The 5 Biggest Mistakes Men Make In Bed – Are You Guilty?

By loveandsex

It’s no secret that men often make mistakes in bed. Men’s bedroom blunders are the talk of many a girl’s night cocktail hour, office gossip and one on one girlfriend phone calls. You can’t stop gals from talking about your bedroom mistakes, but you CAN stop making mistakes in the bedroom! Here’s the 5 biggest mistakes that men make in bed – avoid them at all costs!

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

I’ve had sex with a few guys, but they all seem to be doing something wrong in the bedroom and I can’t put my finger on it! Is this a common thing? Do a lot of guys make mistakes in bed and if so, exactly what mistakes are they making?

–Judy, LA

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uakW7Rx8dVU[/youtube]

When A Man Isn’t Dominant In Bed

Women are drawn to confident men both emotionally and sexually. In bed, one of the biggest mistakes a man can make is expecting the woman to lead and make all the moves. Sometimes women want to be dominant, but more often, women want a man who knows what he wants and isn’t afraid to let a woman know. Don’t be shy about taking the lead in bed – if you want her to go down on you, let her know! If you want to make love to her, just go for it! No girl wants a jerk, but every girl is drawn to a man that is enough of an alpha male that he can take control and she can simply surrender.

When A Man Is Emotionally Distant

You might not think your emotions are involved in the bedroom, but they definitely are, whether you’re with a long time partner or in a new relationship. If you stand behind an emotional wall outside of the bedroom, you’re going to stand behind one inside the bedroom too. Not letting your partner get emotionally close to you during sex really puts her off – you seem indifferent to her, as though you could sleep with her or not and that it doesn’t matter. A woman doesn’t want to think you’re indifferent about sex! Let her in emotionally, let her know that you want her and she will want you right back.

When Men Become Boring And Predictable

Most men get excited when they find a sex technique that a girl likes. They get so excited that they want to repeat that technique over and over, because if it worked the first time, why wouldn’t it work the next twenty times? Girls don’t want a man to become predictable – they want him to be passionate and interested in finding new things that please them. So try new positions, try using sex toys and try lots of different things so you can find several things that she likes and always keep her guessing at what is going to happen next.

When A Man Is Technique Obsessed

Many men are interested in learning lots of techniques that make them better lovers – and kudos to them for taking the initiative to learn more about what a woman wants! But some men become obsessed with technique, to the point of leaving out the emotions and spontaneity of great sex. Don’t let your brain get overwhelmed with techniques – even if something doesn’t work exactly like the book says, go with the flow and focus more on having a great time and giving your partner pleasure.

When Men Pretend To Know Everything

Some men have all the techniques down pat, and others just pretend that they do. The only problem with that is that women can see right through it! Don’t worry about looking like you know exactly what you’re doing. Worry more about learning about how to do things right and being yourself in the process!

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: sex tips

Luxury Vibrators – The Best Sex Toys You’ll Ever Own

By loveandsex

Vibrators – they’re available almost everywhere. On the Internet, in traditional sex toy stores and even in some novelty mall stores and department stores. There are thousands of different kinds of vibrators in many different price ranges with a whole host of features. How on earth do you go about choosing one that you know will work for you?

High End Vibrators

While there are a number of modestly priced vibrators that are easily available for purchase, they often will break quickly or won’t do the job right. If you want a quality, whisper quiet vibrator, your best bet is to go with a high end vibrator. Although these types are more expensive than ones that you’ll find in novelty stores, you will get so much more for your money. If you’ve ever bought cheaper products and ended up having to replace them several times, you might already know that a more expensive product will actually save you money in the long run. But what if you could find the perfect vibrator with everything you wanted that was sleek and discreet? Believe it or not, sex toys have come a long way from the tacky dildos of the past and the perfect vibrator isn’t just wishful thinking anymore.

LELO Vibrators

Want the ultimate class available in a vibrator? LELO’s sleek toys are among the best the world has to offer in vibrators and you’ll be surprised at how well they do the job. The ultra sleek, Nea clitoral massager fits right in the palm of your hand and is incredibly quiet, while the GiGi will give you rocking G-Spot orgasms in mere minutes. LELO’s toys are made with body safe materials and are discreet enough to bring along with you anywhere. Don’t forget about the super chic men’s toys available from LELO – say goodbye to bulky, tacky anal plugs and say hello to “Bob”: the sleekest, most stylish ‘gentleman’s’ plug available.

Jimmy Jane Toys

Jimmy Jane’s products come in a variety of styles and colors, offering exquisite pleasure with the widest array of choices. Why limit yourself when it comes to your own pleasure? Try a classier version of the iconic “Rabbit” vibrator, or explore the incredible completely waterproof, rechargable Form 6 vibrator with a cordless charging dock. If you really want to wrap yourself in luxury, indulge in one of Jimmy Jane’s famous slim vibrators in real platinum or real gold, adorned with almost a carat of conflict-free diamonds. Set the mood with Jimmy Jane’s ultra luxurious fantasy suede play sets, or scent your room with sexy, delicious emollient candles. And for the men and their partners to use simultaneously, the Iconic Ring is a waterproof penis ring that will keep you erect and titillate your partner’s clitoris in a chic and modern way!

Vibrators can be a great addition to your sex life whether you’re flying solo or with a partner. Finding the right vibrator for you doesn’t have to be an ordeal of spending tons of money just to be disappointed. Just put together what you would have spent on a multitude of cheaper, tackier vibrators and just buy one luxe, perfect vibrator that you’ll keep for the rest of your life. Who says pleasure isn’t a smart investment?

Filed Under: Sex Toys Tagged With: dildos, Sex Toys, vibrators

Cuckold Fantasy: My Wife With Another Man – Why Do I Like It?

By loveandsex

Everyone has a secret sex fantasy – what’s yours? Maybe you have a shoe fetish, or perhaps you enjoy BDSM or biting. What is considered outside the norm for you? What if you like watching your wife get banged by another man and really enjoy it? Is this considered abnormal? Should you stop indulging in your fantasy? Here’s what you want to know about 2 guy, 1 girl threesomes and more.

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Cuckold question: I like watching my wife get banged by a well endowed man. I love watching her climax in ways she doesn’t with me. Is this TOO weird?

–John, IN

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XE9xFYeQXxg[/youtube]

Who Gets To Determine What Is Normal?

First of all, what is considered “normal” in this society? There are so many varieties of people with different cultures and different backgrounds who all do things a little bit differently that it’s practically impossible for anyone to determine a baseline of what is considered “normal” or “abnormal.” With that said, people might think your fantasy is weird if you share it with them, but what about those guys who like wearing women’s underwear – do you think that’s weird? Everyone’s own fantasy or fetish isn’t considered strange to them, but other people’s fantasies are labeled “weird” or “abnormal.” It’s all subjective, so worry less about what is “normal” and what isn’t and focus more on how to get what you and your partner both want in a sexually healthy relationship.

Confidence In Your Sexuality And Masculinity

If you enjoy watching your wife have sex with another man and are genuinely cool with it, you deserve some kudos! While involving other women with their wife in a 2-girl, 1 guy threesome is a typical man’s fantasy, the tables often get turned when a woman suggests bringing another man into the equation. Most men are too self conscious, too jealous and too insecure with themselves to really enjoy watching their partner be with another person sexually. If you’re not bothered by watching your wife become sexually intimate with another man and truly enjoy watching her be pleasured in this way, it speaks volumes about your confidence in yourself and your masculinity.

Have Fun!

The best way to judge if your sexual fantasy or fetish is “crossing” the line is to ask yourself the basic question – does it involve only consenting adults? Is everyone comfortable with what is going on? If so, have fun! As long as you and everyone involved can legally consent to sexual activity and no one is being harmed or doing something they’re uncomfortable doing, there is absolutely nothing wrong with enjoying your sexual fetish or fantasy. Make sure your relationship with your partner stays strong and healthy, and communicate with them regularly about what you like, what she likes and what the third person likes during sex. If any hard feelings come up, talk to your partner about them. If you have any suggestions about what would turn you on more, or if your partner has any suggestions about what would turn them on more, it’s important to keep an open line of communication going when it comes to your sex life. The biggest reason that threesome fantasies crumble is that partners have a breakdown in communication – enjoy yourself and talk to your partner often for a healthy and happy sex life!

Filed Under: Bondage, Fetishes, & Fantasies Tagged With: cuckold, fetishes, kink, sexual fantasies

How Do I Introduce BDSM To My Boyfriend?

By loveandsex

Everyone has their fantasy or fetish, and everyone likes different things. It’s part of what makes us such a sexually diverse culture! Many people are into BDSM, or bondage, whether it’s soft BDSM or really getting into dominant and submissive roles. If you like BDSM, how can you introduce it to your partner without getting rejected and possibly even involving them in your fetishes and fantasies?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

I’m very comfortable with my sexuality and a little on the BDSM side… I’ve been this way for years. My fiance and I have done a few things, but I want to try even more – costumes, props, etc. I don’t think he knows how dark my sexual side can be. How can I bring it up to him without scaring him?

–Desiree, MO

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8kE5d01bRc[/youtube]

Let Your Partner Go First

Ask your partner what turns them on. This is not the time for a “sit down” talk, rather, you want to ask him in a very nonchalant sort of way. Bring it up if you’re watching a romantic movie with a hot sex scene, or even if you’re watching pornography together. If you’re visiting the mall, pop into the lingerie store or even the novelty stores that carry some sex toys. Asking your partner what turns them on opens them up to their own fantasies and gets their minds going.

Introduce Yourself Slowly

Don’t break into your fetish by surprising your partner with a leash and collar while wearing a full black leather outfit. You might scare them off! Try incorporating light BDSM into your foreplay and sexual routine, such as using a feather duster or even a light whip. Try purchasing some racier lingerie, or sexy shoes that reflect what turns you on. You can even suggest roleplaying light BDSM roles, such as light submission or light dominance. You might find that your partner really likes this type of sex play and begins to get more into it! If this happens, just ease into your fetish or fantasy slowly, until you’re really sharing with your partner what you like and what turns you on.

Try A Fantasy Box

A “Fantasy Box” is something you and your partner can try if you’re really shy about sharing your fantasies with your partner or your partner is really shy about sharing their fantasies with you. Write down your fantasies on a scrap piece of paper and put it in the box. Have your partner do the same. Make a “rule” that once a week, a fantasy is pulled out of the box and is enacted. If some fantasies require planning, give you and your partner enough time to purchase costumes, etc. This can even be something fun that you do together that can bring you and your partner closer! Decorate the fantasy box with things you both find sexy to make it even more fun.

No matter what, your sex life should be enjoyable and fulfilled, no matter what fetish or fantasy you like. You might be surprised – your fetish or fantasy probably isn’t as uncommon as you think it is! If your partner is freaked out by your fetish, whether it’s BDSM or something else, and you can’t work past it, consider that they might not be the partner for you. Remember – there’s someone out there for everyone!

Filed Under: Bondage, Fetishes, & Fantasies Tagged With: bdsm, bondage, domination, role play, sex games, submission

How Can I Dump Him/Break Up If He Pays The Rent?

By loveandsex

Taking that huge step to move in with your partner is a big decision. Before moving in with someone, make sure it’s what you really want. But what if the “damage” is done already? What if you’ve moved in with your partner and now you’re realizing that you just weren’t ready? How can you move out or break up with them if they’re the one who is paying the rent?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

How can I dump him if I live with him and can’t afford my own rent?

–Jessica, LA

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iL3L9RRYoMw[/youtube]

Figure Out What You Want

Okay, so do you want to just move out and try to continue the relationship while living separately, just like you did before you moved in together? Or do you want to break off the relationship and end it completely? Decide what you want and what you’re willing to do before talking to your partner. You want to be as clear and concise on how you want this situation to play out before your partner starts asking questions.

Be Honest

Honesty is often the best policy. Whether you want to break off the relationship or you simply want to go backwards a little bit and pursue the relationship with your partner like it was before you moved in with them, let your partner know that moving in with them was a step you decided to take too soon. If you want to keep the relationship, let your partner know that you really enjoy being with them, but you just weren’t ready to take that “move in” step and you need a little more space right now than living with them can provide. If you want to end the relationship, just let your partner know the truth – that moving in with them truly made you realize that this relationship wasn’t something you were ready for.

Financial Issues

You might be worried about the financial consequences of moving out of your partner’s place if they’re the ones that pay the rent. It can definitely be scary – but ask yourself what you were doing before you moved in with your partner? Were you living with a roommate? Were you living with your parents? Consider if you can literally go backwards and have the same living arrangements that you did before you moved in with your partner.

If that’s not going to work, consider changing jobs before you break the news to your partner. Earning more money is a great way to become financially independent and if this happens, you can consider living alone. If changing jobs isn’t a possibility, consider rooming with someone. You can put an ad out in the paper or on the internet for a roommate seeking a house or apartment, or you can search the ads for ones that other people have put up looking for a roommate themselves.

No matter what you decide to do, just make sure that your living arrangements are squared away before you talk to your partner. Your partner may agree with you, or not get angry, but then again they might. You need to be prepared to have somewhere to go if your partner should decide to ask you to leave immediately. The idea of arranging for somewhere else to live without letting your partner know may seem cruel or like you’re going behind their back, but in truth, you’re just taking care of yourself and you always need to do that.

Filed Under: Break Up & Divorce Tagged With: breaking up, dating, dating advice, divorce advice

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