Dating Tips – Page 38

I Dated My Friend and It Didn’t Work Out… How Do We Get Our Friendship Back?

You’ve moved out of the friend zone and into a relationship with your best friend or another friend of yours. Sadly, it doesn’t work out for one reason or another, but you want your friend back!

Fortunately, you’re not alone in this awkward situation. What will it take to get your friend back? Can you?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sf5c8FDIiuk[/youtube]

How Mature Are You And Your Friend?

Moving from the friend zone into a relationship is something that happens all the time. A great number of people do this, and a number of them move back into friend status after the relationship has run its course, regardless of whether the relationship was a week long, a month long or even a few years long.

What’s their secret? How do they do this with seemingly no effort at all?

It depends on how mature the two people in the relationship are. If you and your partner are very mature, you’ll be able to better handle moving from the friend zone to a relationship and back to the friend zone again.

If you and your partner aren’t at a high level of maturity at the point in your relationship where you want to be friends again, you might find it difficult to do so without hurt feelings, resentment and awkwardness experienced by one or both parties.

What can you do?

First, be open and honest with your friend. Tell them how you feel! Talk to them about the friendship and how you felt about it before you made the turn towards dating romantically.

Talk to your friend about how you felt while you were dating romantically and how you feel now that the relationship is ending. Talk to your friend about how continuing the friendship would make you feel and how you can best accomplish that goal without letting old feelings get in the way.

Encourage your partner to share their feelings about those topics with you too. A great deal of awkwardness after an ended relationship is one or both parties refusing to communicate with each other and harboring ill feelings and resentment towards the other. Air your dirty laundry and start with a clean slate!

It Might Be The End

Not every friendship turned relationship turned friendship works out, regardless of the level of maturity by both parties. Sometimes it’s not meant to work out and sometimes issues that were dealt with during the relationship are just too difficult to deal with afterwards in a friendship setting.

That’s okay! It’s heartbreaking, sure. It’s a tough thing to deal with, but it’s probably something you knew going into the relationship – that you might lose your friend because of it. It’s a risk you and your friend both decided to take. If you and your friend are having a difficult time moving back into the friend zone after an ended relationship, it might be time to let it go.

You should talk to your friend about where you see this going, but don’t be surprised if it’s difficult to come up with an answer. Remember that not everything works out the way you want it to, and you certainly gave it a good shot. Feel out the situation and find out if it’s time to move on and do it gracefully!

Hairy Chests – Advice From A Woman Who Tells It Like It Is…

By chickinheels

A hairy chest. There are several things to consider here.

Some men simply cannot grow hair on their chests. Some men are `somewhat carpeted `when it comes to their layer of fur. And other men are somewhere in between.

This topic recently crossed my mind and I figured, why not write about it.. Especially since I happen to have a range of experience on the subject matter. So, here`s my take..

It is very rare that you will see a hairy chested man on the cover of a magazine these days. I would tend to lean towards thinking most women are good with a bare chested man. I highly doubt a woman would shun a man for having a hairless chest.

Options For Hairy Men

Thing is, if a man is incredibly hairy, that can definitely be a turn off for some. Here`s the good news, a hairy chest can be MAINTAINED or in some cases `tamed `might be a better choice of words.

The option of waxing may seem excruciating to some (completely warranted in my opinion) but it IS one option. I would suggest, if you are growing an out of control layer of hair, that you first attempt to trim it or depending on how thick it is, possibly shave it down with an electric shaver.

Don`t get caught up in the ‘ìt will grow back thicker’ train of thought. This is about maintaining the abundance of hair, so yeah, hopefully you`ll continue the up-keep and reap the benefits too!

Now, you don`t have to go all out with this and shed your body of all visible hair. Sometimes it just takes a bit of upkeep to avoid looking like you came from the 70`s era. Sometimes the odd minor trim job is all that`s required.

Now, if you are a single guy, and a hairy one, I highly recommend venturing into the `not so hairy`zone. I can`t say I would like to get to the point of stripping a man down and find an overwhelmingly hairy chest under his shirt.

However, I am but just one woman. Although, my girlfriends all feel the same way on this topic, so consider this to be a good base of opinion.

Find Out What Your Partner Prefers

If you are coupled up then simply ask your woman what she prefers. I view it in the same light as a woman who has never shaved between her legs or her bikini line. Why not try it. You just might like it, as may your partner, which is a bonus all around!

My personal preference is a man with a `sprinkling’ of chest hair. Just enough to say that he IS a man, and that I AM under, or on top of one (wink!). For me, back hair and thick arm hair is a turn off. Been there, done that and NOT going that route again.

It`s the same advice I`d give regarding a woman`s bikini line, trim it up, shave it down. Give it a try. Your partner may LOVE it and hey, you can always grow it back if grooming isn`t for you!

What To Do When He Doesn’t Call After Your First Date… What Happened?

By victoryarogers

Almost every woman has been on a first date where the man didn’t call back afterwards, even if he said he would.It can be frustrating and even embarrassing, but it’s really very normal.

As a woman who hasn’t been called by your date, especially if you’re really interested in the guy, what can you do?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rcWjYFJSoEI[/youtube]

Going On With Your Life

If you’ve been on a first date with a really great guy and everything seemed to work out great, you might wonder whey he’s not calling you back. It’s important that you don’t obsess about it! Let it go and move on with your life.

You might think that it’s a lost opportunity or you might wonder what it was about you that he didn’t like, and you might be tempted to call him and find out why. Don’t! There are several reasons why he might not have called.

He might have lost your number – really. If he did and he really did like you, he’ll find a way to track you down. He might have had some kind of crisis, or he might be transitioning out of a relationship to make room for you in his life.

Or he might not have liked you. Whatever his reasons are for not calling back, you’re going to have to accept them even if you don’t know exactly what they are. If you call back, asking why he didn’t call, you’re definitely going to look like a psycho stalker woman. Just be cool, calm and collected about it and move on with your life, even going on dates with other men.

The Second Chance

If you didn’t like the guy all that much and he doesn’t call back, it’s really no big deal. If you did, however, really enjoy the time you spent with him, it’s a little more difficult to deal with if he doesn’t call back. You might get a second chance though!

Never Ask Why!

If your date returns your call two weeks or even a month later, never ask why he didn’t call. That will end it right then and there. Just be glad to hear from him! Act like no time has passed at all since the first date and the telephone call.

If you’re cool about the phone call, you’re going to change his first impression of you and probably make him wish he had called you sooner. Don’t make him regret calling you again at all.

This is the same as if you run into him somewhere, such as at the grocery store or a bookstore, even if he’s with another girl! Show him that it’s really no skin off your nose and that you’re pleased to see him. You might end up getting a call after that!

Maneuvering yourself within the dating world can be difficult. There are a ton of great guys out there, but the pressure is on, right? Wrong! Take the pressure off yourself, no matter how old you are or how good looking you are.

When women feel that the pressure is on to find a steady relationship, they get a little crazy and even the best of women can turn into someone a man never wants to go on a date with again. Just take the pressure off, relax and have fun! That’s what dating is all about.

Who Should Pick Up The Check On The First Date?

By victoryarogers

First dates can be uncomfortable in and of themselves. It can be nerve wracking to try to figure out what you should do and what you shouldn’t do on a first date, while at the same time sizing your date up to try to figure out if you really like them.

While we believe that in the 21st century the “one who does the inviting” should pick up the check – whether man or woman… Special guest Victorya Rogers, feels that women need to use some good old fashioned values to catch the perfect man.

If you are a little more old school and believe that the man should always pay on the first date, it can get really uncomfortable if he just won’t pick up the check. What should you do?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jKrg12HfU9s[/youtube]

When The Man Doesn’t Pay

The check for dinner is on the table. You haven’t made a move for it, because traditionally, the man pays on the first date. Unfortunately, he hasn’t seemed to make a move for it either. What do you do? Do you pick up the check just to be done with it?

Not necessarily. There are a few things you can do to make it obvious that you expect your date to pay for the check without outright asking that he do so. The first thing you can do is excuse yourself to the bathroom for a certain period of time.

Five or so minutes is usually sufficient, because it will seem like quite a while, but saying “I was only gone five minutes” sounds viable. In this time, your date may pick up the check. He may actually have been waiting for a moment like that to discreetly pay for the food.

Many men don’t want a big deal made out of the check, so they’ll pay it when a woman is in the bathroom or has made her way to the car already.

If you return and the check is still not paid, you can simply ask if you will be leaving soon or what his plans are for the rest of the evening. The point is to avoid asking about the check or mentioning at all.

If he wishes for you to pay the check or pay a portion of it, you’re going to make him ask you to do it directly. He may be waiting awhile, figuring that if he doesn’t say anything about it for a long period of time, you’ll simply pick up the check yourself. You’re not going to give him that opportunity! For you to pay the check, he is going to have to ask you outright.

If You End Up Picking Up The Check

If your date does, unfortunately, ask you to pay the check or pay a portion of the check, do so politely. Now is not the time to argue or make a scene. You can bet he won’t be getting another date though!

Many men who refuse to pay for the check or make the woman pay are either thinking of you as only a friend or trying to turn you into a one night stand and doesn’t want to make any investment because he’s looking for a quick getaway.

Do you really want to date someone like that again? If your date doesn’t pay on the first date and asks you to pay, especially after it’s after a long, drawn out awkward phase in which neither of you pay the checks, the guy doesn’t deserve any more of your time!

Dating After 50 – Welcome to the 21st Century!

By elainewilliams

Following the death of my husband, there came a point in time where I decided to enter the dating world. My social life had been reduced to people I saw at work and my kids’ friends. Living in a small community combined with being self employed, I realized I was becoming a bit of a recluse.

I knew I had to make some changes in my life in an attempt to move forward and not remain stagnant. It was a bit daunting, being single and dating after having been married for twenty years.

Whoa! This is Dating Now!

The first thing I discovered was that dating had changed drastically from what I remembered. Everything associated with online dating, dating services and matchmaking services felt foreign.’ It left me feeling oddly out of place for a woman who had not participated in any type of dating for twenty-five years or more.

My initial thoughts were that it would be a relatively uncomplicated means to boost a sagging social life. Yes, I admit to being naïve.

The Online Dating Experience

I soon discovered that with online dating, “normal” took on a new definition. I was blithely unaware that some would view my boys, ages 12 to 21, as liabilities, even though I had no intention of searching for a new “father” for them.

In filling out dating profiles, I was scrupulously honest, however, I learned not everyone followed this rule. By now, I suspect you the reader may be wondering in what sandbox my head was buried all these years.

For some reason I attracted men who didn’t know or care anything about commitment, caring or long term relationships. The more I talked to other daters of various ages and sexual orientation, I was surprised to discover similar experiences across the board.

The New Dating Dilemma

I had to wonder how had dating become such a dilemma? Dating in the 21^st century seemed rather hit and miss. Many times it’s an opportunity to get what you can and move on. I hated feeling like I was at a smorgasbord and in danger of being passed over for a newer, tastier dish.

By the time most of us have reached fifty years of age, life’s experiences have wounded us in some way or another, which of course colors our thoughts, feelings and relationships. However, I was still a bit taken back to discover some “fifty-somethings” have let basic courtesy, caring and honesty skills fall by the wayside.

What I Know Now

I learned to steer clear of emotionally unavailable partners; men still “attached” to other women and men who dated but obviously preferred to remain loners. Many men were good men in their own right, but not right for me.

I began to ask myself, why be with someone who contributes nothing to my life? I deserved better.

My early dating experiences reinforced the notion that a relationship should begin as friends, letting a partner show true interest and caring before jumping into any intimacy.

It took several unhappy experiences before I realized being true to myself is my real power. After dating for two years, I made the decision not to date superficially, but find instead a man who will enhance my life as I will enhance his. Why should anyone settle for less?