Online Dating Tips & Advice

The 10 Worst Online Dating Headlines And Why They Suck

Don’t underestimate the power of your headline. Next to your photo, it is one of the most powerful marketing tools of your online dating profile.

A good headline can draw crowds of people, even if you don’t have a photo. A bad headline however… can make you all but invisible.

In no particular order, here are the 10 worst headlines out there… so common and boring that people don’t even see them as they skim through ads. Use these and fail.

Number 10

HEADLINE: “Insert funny headline here.”
WE THINK: “Wow, people are still using this tired old line?”
This wasn’t funny years ago, and everyone has seen it dozens of times since. Be creative. If you’ve seen it somewhere before, it’s old news.

Number 9

HEADLINE: “Clever headline #28492”
WE THINK: “Ugh, at least it isn’t ‘Insert funny headline here!’”
This lame old headline just won’t die. Do you really want something this boring and unoriginal to be the first thing people read about you?

Number 8

HEADLINE: “how abot diner and drniks”
WE THINK: “You can’t even spell properly in your headline? Is our first date going to be at Chuck E Cheese?”
There is NO excuse for spelling errors in your headline, and yet it is so common. First impressions are everything, and your headline counts. The “dinner and drinks” headline itself is also overused.

Number 7

HEADLINE: “Love to laugh.“
WE THINK: “So? Who doesn’t?”
People write this as if it makes them unique… but have you ever known anyone who didn’t enjoy laughing? Although this headline intends to display value by making you look special, it actually reduces your value by showing that you are average.

Number 6

HEADLINE: “I’m looking for someone special.”
WE THINK: “Wow, I’ve just been hanging out here waiting to show myself to someone who was LOOKING for someone special! Now that you’re here, I’m saved!”
Because you are looking for someone special, does it mean that the truly special people should come check you out? Nope. No one cares what you are looking for, they only care what they are looking for. Use your headline to build your own value.

Number 5

HEADLINE: “Hmm, I don’t know what to write here.”
WE THINK: “Stumped already? Our first date is going to suck.”
If you can’t think of your own headline, you’re either heavily medicated and should not be out dating or you lack any thought processes at all. There is no excuse. None. Steal something off the front page of Yahoo if you have to.

Number 4

HEADLINE: “I’ll fill this in later.”
WE THINK: “Too lazy to even write a headline? I can’t imagine how much fun our relationship will be…”
If you can’t be bothered, why should anyone else bother with you? Seriously, laziness is one of the biggest turn offs there is.

Number 3

HEADLINE: “One last try…”
WE THINK: “One last try… because you’ve struck out so many times already?”
Showing weakness or failures is never a great way to get anyone attracted to you.

Number 2

HEADLINE: “Single and looking.”
WE THINK: “Really? On an online dating site? Shocking.”
This redefines redundant, and tells the reader nothing more than that you are exactly the same as the other 50,000 people reading the site that day.

Number 1

HEADLINE: “Hello,” or “Hi.”
WE THINK: “Nice to meet you, I’ll be going to read some INTERESTING headlines now. Bye!”
This is definitely one of the most common and boring headlines out there. It is completely uncreative and lacking any effort. People won’t even see it listed amongst the other interesting and funny headlines out there.

And there you have the top 10 most useless online dating headlines. These also fail as subject lines for first emails. The rule is, always be interesting, exciting, funny, or fascinating. Never, ever be average.

Happy dating!

Online Dating – Can I Really Fall In Love Online?

By loveandsex

With the invention of the Internet and dating websites, the world of dating has opened up doors for millions of people to meet like-minded others.

You might meet someone who you fall really hard for and are convinced that it was meant to be, but is it?

Can you really fall in love online?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

I’ve been chatting with this guy online line and we’ve really hit it off. Is it possible to fall in love with someone without meeting them in person?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CDaPuv1yrwY[/youtube]

The Power Of Imagination

Meeting someone online with whom you get alone is a wonderful, beautiful thing. It’s amazing to be able to introduce yourself to someone online and get to know them a little bit without the awkwardness that traditional dating can sometimes bring. However, keeping a relationship confined to a dating website or to email or webcams can severely limit the growth of the relationship.

How can you be sure that you truly love this person when you know so little about them? It’s impossible to learn everything about someone through an online dating site or through email or even phone conversations. You may feel like you love this person, but what really happens is that your imagination “fills in the gaps.”

Whatever you don’t know about them is something your imagination comes up with and you end up being in love with a semi-fictional but realistic person. Sadly, even if you do meet up with this person after dating online for awhile, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. It would be impossible for them to live up to what you’ve dreamed up about them.

Online Introductions

That doesn’t mean you have to swear off online dating websites entirely. They’re a great way to meet people in your area that have similar interests and enjoy doing the same things as you. If you meet someone online, however, it’s important to keep the online part strictly an introduction.

Meet in Person

Arrange to meet them during the day in a public place, such as a nice café for lunch, and start getting to know them in person. You’ll learn all sorts of things about them that you never could online. What do they smell like? What is their body language like? These are truly the things that can make or break the deal. If you and your new match hit it off, you can spend time growing and cultivating a real life relationship – something that can last!

Dealing With Disappointment

If you’ve fallen in love with someone online only to watch it fizzle out over a few months, you’re not alone. Human beings need intimate human contact. It’s actually something we need to survive. An online relationship does not fulfill that need but sadly, most people who enter the world of online dating don’t find this out until they’ve had their heart broken or end up disappointed in a lackluster relationship.

If you’ve been disappointed with an online relationship, don’t let it get the best of you. Open your heart and be ready to receive love again, even if it is online.

You can set yourself up for dating success by keeping the online part to an “introduction” and moving the relationship into real life where you can truly get to know someone. You may end up finding the love of your life and experiencing the most fulfilling relationship you’ve ever had. Just give it a real chance instead of keeping it on screen.

Webcam Love Affair – Will It Work?

By loveandsex

In the digital age, internet relationships and love affairs are becoming more and more common.

Dating websites are running rampant and the invention of webcams and microphones, you can have an almost face to face conversation with someone else.

Unfortunately, many of these internet relationships don’t work out. Whether it’s a long distance relationship with a previous partner or someone you met on the internet, without physical contact, your relationship may wane.

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

I’m in a long-distance relationship with a guy I’ve never met. I’ve seen him on webcam, but that’s all. I seem to have fallen for him and I love him very much. We used to talk all the time, but lately we haven’t talked at all. The past few weeks, I’ve said only a few things to him and one of those times I was angry at someone and complaining to him. We seem to fight all the time and I don’t know what I could do to fix it. We’ve tried all sorts of things, but nothing seems to work!

Please help us! –Keely

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EyhgXriovo[/youtube]

Why Internet Relationships Don’t Cut It

Humans crave physical contact. From the time that we’re born, our bodies crave to be touched. It’s not necessarily a sexual need, it’s more of a physical need. We crave intimacy and closeness with other people, even if it’s just a hug or cuddling on the couch in front of a movie. Webcam love affairs and internet relationships are obviously lacking this very critical component.

If being apart from your partner is temporary, subsisting on webcam and phone communication is often enough to get you through until you are able to be together again. However, if your internet relationship is simply that, it can be difficult if not downright impossible to get the physical contact and intimacy you need from your partner to keep the relationship alive.

Online Introductions . . . Not Online Dating

Internet dating should be called internet introductions. It’s perfectly fine and actually quite helpful to introduce yourself to someone online through an internet dating website, because it helps you find the person that you think best fits your personality. Often, after a period of time communicating online and possibly over the phone, you can meet your partner in person and begin building a real life relationship.

Many people, however, forget to do that last part and confine the relationship to the internet only. This is a critical mistake that can cost you the relationship. An internet relationship isn’t enough to keep you and your partner satisfied, especially if it’s someone you met online.

If you really like your new partner, make an effort to meet them in person and try building a relationship with them.

Relationships are hard work.

It probably comes as no surprise that real life relationships are hard work. It takes a variety of skills such as listening skills, body language skills and interpersonal skills to make a relationship successful. If you get discouraged, it can be tempting to confine a relationship online for fear of getting rejected in real life.

This is no way to have a relationship! Take your time and have confidence in yourself to find someone that you like and that you can have a real relationship with. If you meet someone worthwhile, take the next step and meet them. If it doesn’t work out, take the time to find someone who you are more compatible with.

Dating and having real life relationships is a series of trial and error. If it doesn’t work out with someone, try dating someone else. You can also mix it up a little bit. Search online dating websites for matches while you also keep an eye out in real life for people you think you’d like to date as well. With some effort and a good attitude, you’ll find someone with whom you are compatible with and enjoy spending time and being intimate with!

Online Dating: How To Avoid Being Perceived As An Email Pest!

By nml

If you’ve been dating online for any length of time, you will have come across a few people that are too eager, or too persistent, or even over familiar. It’s not about restraining your eagerness, or not pursuing someone, or avoiding building a rapport.

It is about striving for a balance because the reality is that, if you don’t keep certain things in check, somebody, somewhere, may be describing you as a pest, desperado, or even stalker. Here are three actions that are likely to rub someone up the wrong way or have you marked in the pest category.

1. Sending a flurry of winks and emails based on seeing a profile (no response yet)

I’m delighted for you – you’ve found a profile that excites you and you want to stake your claim before someone else does, so you send a flurry of emails and winks to bring yourself to their attention.

The trouble is that regardless of whatever wonderful qualities you claim to have and the wondrous message that may be contained within those emails, they may never get opened because you seem a little desperate, over eager, and are actually behaving a little disproportionately to what has actually happened.

You have seen a profile! Send an email with a great catchy title or something and do the job of fifteen emails with one!

2. Sending terse emails after not getting a response to an initial email

I know it’s annoying not to get a response but I want to bring you back to reality with a bump. You saw a profile, you liked it, you got in touch. Don’t assume that by sending an email that you are entitled to a response. If you’ve been building sandcastles in the sky and fantasizing about a fairy tale ending with the recipient, you’ve set yourself up for a fall because so far, this whole thing is in your head!

Sometimes people are busy but intend to respond. Sometimes people are so overwhelmed with responses that they don’t even get a chance to reply. In an ideal world, people would respond to every message but it’s a bit like sending rejection emails for job applications, and to be honest, isn’t a rejection email a bit unnecessary?

Slow your roll. If you get a response, great. If you don’t, move on! Unless you’re on a teeny tiny dating site, there are other people! Don’t bank on one horse until you know there is a horse!

3. Making a flurry of communication after exchanging emails

Great, you’ve actually made contact with someone, exchanged email addresses and mobile numbers. The worst thing you could do right now is to send text after text, or emails trying to downplay your eagerness and desperation but actually seeming even MORE desperate! You know the emails I’m talking about:

“I know I’ve sent you several emails already but I’m not being a pest and I don’t want you thinking I’m desperate. It’s just that I sent you a couple of emails but I haven’t heard from you. There’s no pressure for you to respond….”

For a start, just because YOU decide you’re not a pest doesn’t mean you aren’t. Just because YOU decide your actions aren’t desperate does not mean that they aren’t!

Sending several emails and texts, or even leaving voice mail messages when you’ve had no response yet from someone you hardly know is borderline, if not full on pest behavior. What if they are out? What if they are nursing their sick grandmother on their death bed? What if, they see all of these emails, texts, and voice mails and feel a bit scared that they have unleashed a bit of a psycho?

Always remember the 3 P’s of avoiding being an online dating pest:

Patience, Proportion, and Persistence Control.

It doesn’t kill you to wait for a response to your initial contact – whatever you do, don’t send more than one email until you have a had a response.

Don’t get this online dating lark twisted. There are potentially thousands, if not millions of people on these websites and whilst I appreciate that you want to get a date, you need to keep things in perspective and proportion.

Don’t inflate the fact that you got in touch with someone into more than what it is because nobody ‘owes’ you a reply and if you get carried away every time you make contact with someone, you won’t get very far!

And whilst I admire some people’s very thick skin that’s comparable to hide of a rhino, there is persistence in terms of staying the course with online dating even with some negative experiences, and then there is persistence in the form of not knowing when to back off, or refusing to take silence for answer.

How To Get More Hits To Your Online Dating Profile

By nml

I’m going to premise this by saying that I can give you some tips for helping you get more ‘hits’ on your profile but I make no promises that if you write the most amazing profile on earth, you’ll find your soul mate.

A lot can happen after some winks and a flurry of emails! But until then, here are some quick tips for a more attractive online dating profile.

Use a photo!

Everyone should use a photo and it should be one that is representative of you, shows you in as flattering a light as possible, should ideally have just you in it. and should be in focus. Obviously it goes without saying; it should be YOU!

Start on a positive note

I would steer clear of saying anything that makes it sound like dating online is beneath you or that has been forced upon you. It sends the wrong message. Avoid saying anything that makes you sound like a prospect to avoid because you need to captivate them in the first couple of lines. That’s right, captivate, not scare or turn off. Be confident.

Easy on the length

They say that size matters but in this case, it’s about striking a balance between so short it seems like you don’t care, and so long, it seems like you want the person to be overwhelmed with boredom. People don’t read web pages in the same way that they read books or magazines, and are quite likely to skim, so writing the longest profile in history will hinder chances.

Leave a little mystery

Yes the profile is for telling a prospective date about yourself but if you roll out everything in the profile and tell them ever itty, bitty, little piece of info about yourself, what’s left to ask? Write enough to create curiosity and have the prospective date wanting to find out more.

Be careful of stating the obvious and suffering from ‘Those who doth protest too much’ syndrome

It’s better to be funny with your profile rather than state “I’m really funny” because…well that’s not very funny! Convey and prove your personality with whatever you write because quite frankly, I glaze over when I read “great sense of humor” and “great guy”.

And purlease steer clear of trying to ram ‘qualities’ down people’s throats. I’m really nice; I’m really honest; I’m really caring – People who are nice, honest, or caring don’t make a point of stating it, they just are these things.

But…convey your personality and qualities

There’s no point trying to make out like you have one of the greatest sense of humors if you don’t convey this. It doesn’t mean that you turn your profile into a stand-up, but if you want to come across light and humorous, you don’t write a serious, potentially cold profile that is more likely to trigger depression…

Be descriptive

“I spent a year traveling through the luscious jungles of South America, living in a tent, and living off the crops” creates an instant picture as opposed to “I love traveling”.

Be positive

If you sell yourself short and are down on yourself, why do you expect people to be attracted to you? It’s best not to go around stating negatives about yourself, particularly since we can sometimes be critical of the wrong things. You are selling yourself here – not literally obviously!

Don’t do the ‘Poor Pathetic Me Whine”

Sorry guys but this is mainly a male error in online dating profiles. If a woman wrote a profile and said “I’m recently divorced, I’m feeling quite lonely and I wonder if I’ll ever find true love again”, guys would label her ‘needy’ and ‘too emotional’.

When a guy says this stuff, he knows that women out there lap it up and think “Ooh, I can change him! Let me be the one to make him feel whole again”. But women are getting wise to this and it’s not exactly a glowing reflection of your wonderful traits to whine about your problems!

Don’t lie

If you’re married…well you shouldn’t even be writing a profile unless you’re both looking for kinky couples….But that aside, lies are why I am very cautious about dating online. Stick to truths and remember that if you lie, at some point you are going to be caught out.

Don’t boast

Trust me, if you spend your profile boasting about what you own or who you know, or what you do, you’ll sound like a seven year old bragging to the neighborhood kids. You’ll have an audience temporarily and then they’ll go off and laugh at you. Either that or you draw in someone who will take advantage of whatever you have boasted about.