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Q&A: Sexual Virgin – I’m Not Sure I’m Ready

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Losing your virginity is a big step, and it’s one that you have to be emotionally and physically ready for. If you’re being pressured to have sex with someone and you’re a virgin, you may be tempted to lose your virginity just to get it “over with.” Fortunately, you don’t have to take that approach to losing your virginity. If you’re not ready, here’s how to be true to yourself and let your partner know what you’re comfortable with – and what you’re not comfortable with.

Question: Dear Dan and Jenn,I am 14 years old and I have been in a relationship with a guy for 2 years. Recently he said he wanted to have sex and I am not sure if I do, but I am worried if I tell him that I don’t want to lose my virginity to him, he will think I am not into him anymore. What do I do?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qcsDyZS9Zo[/youtube]

Staying True To Yourself

Being honest with yourself and staying true to yourself is the most important thing in this type of situation. If you’re not emotionally ready or physically ready for sex, there is absolutely no reason you should have to do it. Don’t try to convince yourself that having sex with your partner will make your relationship better or that your partner won’t think you like them if you don’t have sex with them. The only thing that matters here is what you’re comfortable with. If you’re not comfortable with having sex, don’t do it! There are no external factors here. It’s only about you and what you do or don’t want to do. If your partner pressures you to have sex when you’re not ready, or doesn’t respect your decision to wait, it’s definitely time to move on so you can be with someone who really loves you and respects your decisions.

Being Emotionally Ready For Sex – And The Consequences

Sex can bring great pleasure, but if you’re not emotionally ready for sex, it can bring a lot of trouble too. If you break up with your boyfriend or girlfriend after losing your virginity to them (especially when you’re very young), it will most likely be more painful for you than if the breakup happened without you and your partner having had sex. You never forget your first time, so before you lose your virginity, make sure you’re having sex for the first time with the person you really want your first time to be with. Sex can also bring other consequences that make the situation more complicated, such as pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Take some time to think it through and consider all the possible outcomes of having sex before you actually do it. You can’t go back after you’ve done it and do it differently or take more time. Once you do it, it can’t be undone, so really think it through first.

Educate Yourself About Sex

You may think you know what you need to know about sex, but you’d really be surprised at what you haven’t learned yet. Take some time to educate yourself about safe sex, condoms, the morning after pill, pregnancy and various types of sexually transmitted diseases and the different ways you can get them or pass them on. Don’t rely on someone else to tell yo what’s up when it comes to sex, and don’t wait until after you’ve had sex for the first time to find these things out. If you do decide to have sex with your partner and have decided you’re emotionally ready for it, make sure you know how to keep yourself safe too.

First Time Sex Tips – How To Lose Your Virginity In Style

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First time sex is field with anticipation (the good kind) and excitement. But I bet you are also tense and apprehensive about losing your virginity. If you’re like most girls, you probably want to be a sex bombshell as early as your first time. Is it possible to be good in bed if you have had zero experience in the past?

To answer that question, yes. You are capable of turning your man on and being great in bed even without prior experience in the erotic arts. How? Here are some tips on how you can lose your virginity in style.

Choose a Fabulous Outfit

Your first time is an event worth celebrating, even if you’re the only one who thinks it’s a big deal. When you’re alone, imagine yourself with the man you love and think of what would make you feel sexy at that moment. Imagine the scene from undressing to going under the covers.

It’s impossible for you to be dressed in your usual clothes one minute and be completely naked the next. The transition from dressed to undressed is a crucial part of sex. You’ll be in your underwear, so you’d better look great.

Go out to the shopping mall and look for the most stunning, sexy lingerie you can find. When you see a lacy pair, ask yourself if you want to lose your virginity in that outfit. If you’re hesitant about splurging money for your first time, just remind yourself that this is a once in a lifetime experience and you’d rather spend it in lace than in your usual cotton bloomers.

Feel Sexy

There are some things that women do to feel sexy. Some girls wear their hair a certain way. Some love putting on sheer lip gloss (the ultra-wet variety), and some use dark mascara and eyeliner to emphasize their eyes. Some spend time in the spa or the beauty parlor with girlfriends to moisturize their skin and feel refreshed.

Whatever will make you feel sexy, do it. The more sexy you feel, the more you will lose the awkwardness of knowing it’s your first, while it may be his twentieth time in the bedroom with a girl. At the very least, knowing that you look your best will help you feel more comfortable about baring your whole body in front of a guy.

Connect With Your Man Romantically

Sex with love involved feels a lot better than “just sex”. If you’re feeling so much distance in your relationship, don’t have sex. Do it when the right time comes, and usually, this means you need to be more than a bit in love with the guy before you give up your virginity.

Romance will get you in the right mood. Have something prepared to make him feel more romantic towards you. Put on some music, light some scented candles and go for whispered conversation rather than a normal one. Make sure you feed your man dessert with your hands so that you can transition from the dining room to the bedroom easily.

5 Most Popular Places To Have Sex

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Have you ever felt the urge to have sex with your man but you’re not quite sure you have the patience to drive a few kilometres to get to his place together? Have you ever been too broke to rent a room but you feel that you’re going to burst in the next hour if you don’t do it with him at that moment? There are so many couples that have felt the same way and somehow survived by not being too fussy about their choice of where to have sex.

Being frugal and having no other choice are not the only reasons to go out and look for other love nest venues. If your sex life has stalled, and you’re looking for ways to spice things up, it’s time to have sex in other, more exciting places.

5 Most Popular Places To Have Sex

  1. In The Car – It’s exciting when you do it in the parking lot, where other cars and people are moving around. Doing it in a car will only allow the most basic sex positions, but the thrill of having sex in a public place is worth it!
  2. In A Motel – If you can’t afford a room in a 5-star hotel, renting a motel room is a good alternative. Motel room walls are thin so you can’t make too much noise. Choose one that’s near his place or your place so that you feel like you’re sneaking out to have illicit sex. As long as there’s a bed and a heater, a motel room is good enough for a playful 3-hour romp.
  3. In A Tent – On your anniversary, why not pitch a tent in your backyard and do it there. Again, you can’t make too much noise because you might wake the neighbors. The cramped interior of the tent will force you and your boyfriend to stick to the more traditional sex positions like spooning and missionary.
  4. In A Hammock On The Beach At Sunset – For a more exciting and romantic intimate moment, on the beach (or your backyard), you can try doing it while you’re lying together in a hammock. The risk of falling off is one of the things that make this sex venue exciting. You can try woman-on-top so that her legs are hanging on both sides of the hammock. Alternatively, you can try the spoon position, even if the risk of falling off is greater.
  5. While Swimming In The Pool Or At The Beach – Sex underwater is uncomfortable, but if you are suitably lubricated during penetration, you only have to move slightly to feel the friction. If you can’t do the standing position normally because your man cannot carry you, this is a great way to try this sex position without much effort on his part.

Doing it in places other than your bedroom will prove that you’re still fun, playful and adventurous as a couple. Changing venues is a great way to bring back the excitement in your relationship and to improve intimacy.

First Time Sex Tips – 3 Important Health Concerns

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We women have been taught that first time sex is a painful experience. This notion of a painful first time affects us more than we know. We end up dreading the event and we feel tense during what we call a “trying ordeal.” I disagree with that.

Sex for the first time should not be thought of as painful. It should be a celebration of love and a grand entrance to the world of adulthood. For the first time ever, you are sharing your body with someone who is also into you.

It is a special experience, but you do have to know some important health issues linked with first time sex. Remember, you are going to have to take care of yourself more now that you have started to become sexually active. If it’s your first time, here are some important health tips you should know about…

Always Demand That He Use A Condom

If you are a virgin and he is not, there is a chance that he will be a bit lax when it comes to protection because he is entering “unchartered territory.” This means he knows he’s fairly “safe” with you because you never had lovers in the past.

However, you should always ask him to use a condom, even if it’s your first time. It’s not that you do not trust him to be able to pull out at the critical point, or that you don’t trust his judgment when it comes to his choices of the women he slept with. You just know that accidents could happen and safe sex is still the best practice.

Always bring a condom with you whenever you feel that your man is looking forward to sex after your date. This will eliminate his excuse of forgetting to bring one.

Rinse With Warm Water

I can tell you this – the first entry is uncomfortable, but the painful feeling will come after the first sex. However, you can feel “comfortable” before and after sex by being constantly lubricated. This can be achieved by intense foreplay before sex and rinsing with warm flowing water after sex.

Rinsing properly after your first time will also make sure your wound begins healing minutes after you had sex. And, the best part is, you can go at it again after you rinse if you continue with after play. Lubrication whether with your own fluids or with warm tap water, will increase your comfort.

Clitoral Orgasm

After the break in, you may feel sore in there, and he should know this. But what if you are still willing to go for another round? It’s not surprising that you didn’t reach climax during the first time. You were tense and you were anticipating sex to be painful. Clitoral orgasm for the second time sex is the answer to this dilemma.

Instead of deeper penetration, ask him to concentrate his caresses on the outer part of your vagina. He can use his fingers to probe deeper, but not so deep that you feel tense with discomfort. With your vagina sensitive and tingly after you’ve rinsed with warm water, you should feel the pleasure of clitoral orgasm more intensely.

Q&A: What’s The Best Sex Position For First Time Sex?

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The best sex positions are often a matter of personal preference, but is it normal to be concerned about what position to use if both partners are having sex for the first time? Yes, but choosing the best sex position for first time sex isn’t difficult at all. Here’s how you can relax, find the position that works for you and your partner and have fun!

Question: What’s the best position the man should be in if they are both having sex for the first time?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0uqOoCbtQo[/youtube]

Missionary Position

It may be cliché, but it’s a classic. The missionary position is considered the most natural, easiest position to get into. With the man on top, he can be in control of the thrusting and the woman can be in control of the angle of her pelvis to help prevent his penis from going in too deep and causing discomfort for the first time. Typically, most people use the missionary position when having sex for the first time, simply because it’s a position that is comfortable for just about everyone. You can go slow or fast with the missionary position, or start slow and build up speed as you and your partner get closer to orgasm.

Other Positions

While there are hundreds of other sex positions you can choose from for your first time having sex, it may not be the best idea. Sex positions like doggy style or woman on top will allow your penis to penetrate her vagina too deeply at first, causing extreme discomfort and pain for her. As you and your partner continue to have sex and her vagina becomes accommodated to your penis, she will be able to relax more and start to feel more comfortable with other sex positions. Some positions, however, aren’t focused so much on deep penetration, such as spooning. Talk to your partner about sex positions that she might be interested in for her first time, and ask her to be honest about her concerns. Is she afraid that some sex positions will hurt, or is she more interested in trying an advanced sex position? There’s nothing wrong with using any sex position you want to for your first time, as long as you and your partner are both comfortable with it and it feels good.

Remember To Have Fun

Great sex isn’t about the perfect position. You certainly don’t have to pick the “best” sex position to have fun, and you don’t have to have the best sex position to make your first time sex special. Relax a little and remember to have fun. Sometimes, things don’t go perfectly the first time and that’s okay. Your first time, as well as hers, will be special no matter what if you have a good attitude about it and aren’t stressed about having a flawless first time. If you try a certain position and it’s not working out for either your or your partner, don’t be afraid to try something else or get creative. There’s no certain way your first time has to be. Just make sure you and your partner are having a good time!