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You are here: Home / Archives for how to masturbate

Q&A: Is It Normal To Get Random Erections During The Day?

By loveandsex

Getting unwanted unwanted erections during the day – especially when you’re not doing or thinking about anything sexual at all – can be a burden for many boys in their teenage years. What is normal when it comes to getting frequent erections and what can you do to stop it from happening?

Question: Dear Dan and Jennifer, I was wondering if it is normal to get random erections during the school day, and is there anything I can do to prevent it? Please help. Thanks, and I love your show. 🙂

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ASTSXn6mmoA[/youtube]

The Role Teenage Hormones Play

Both teenage girls and boys have an abundance of hormones that are coursing through their body at any given time. The body is going through major changes during this stage and life and teenage hormones can cause lots of strange things to happen to the body. Almost all teenagers notice an increase in sweat, odor and acne, while teenage girls may notice their breasts becoming larger and will be starting their periods. Teenage boys, on the other hand, can experience erections at a variety of different times. Many boys experience “wet dreams” where the penis becomes hard and ejaculates during the night. Boys may also experience erections during the day, even when they’re not doing or thinking about anything sexual at all. This is completely normal and due to the increased hormones that boys experience during their teenage years.

Masturbation Can Reduce The Number Of Unwanted Erections

To reduce the amount of unwanted erections, masturbation can help. By masturbating, a young boy is releasing many of the hormones that are causing his erections in the first place and this will help keep the penis from becoming hard so often. Masturbate in the morning before school to try to prevent erections during the day, or try doing it in the evening. Masturbate at a variety of different times during the day to find out which time will reduce unwanted erections the most. Just be careful not to focus too much on masturbation. If you find that you’re always thinking about masturbation or planning your activities around your masturbation times too much, you may be addicted. Other than a serious masturbation addiction, masturbation is a normal and healthy way for teenage boys to relieve sexual tension and reduce unwanted erections.

Have Patience

Being a teenager is tough. There are so many awkward emotions and body functions that are involved during the teenage years for both boys and girls. It may seem like there’s no end in sight, but these problems won’t last forever. As you grow up, your body will produce less hormones and your emotions and body functions will level out. Don’t worry so much about it, because right now, everyone is going through the same things that you are. Everyone has issues during their teenage years, and lots of teenage boys experience unwanted erections and masturbate daily or almost daily. Avoid making fun of others for something that happens to you too! Have patience and know that this is a common, normal thing that happens to almost every teenage boy. Take comfort in the fact that you know it’s not going to last forever.

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: erection, how to masturbate, masturbation, sex advice, sex education, sex tips

(Ladies) How To Masturbate In 10 Easy Steps

By loveandsex

Masturbation for women is not at all like what masturbation is for men. Men often learn to masturbate at a young age, whereas many women have never tried masturbation before at all! Masturbation is a great way to satisfy your sexual curiosity and needs if you’ve never had sex before or in between sexual relationships. It’s also an excellent way to connect with yourself spiritually, emotionally and sexually. Here’s how to masturbate in 10 easy steps!

Part 1 of 2

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VVDMVMBh348[/youtube]

Part 2 of 2

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DiSiVfwRjBI&feature=channel[/youtube]

Get Yourself In The Mood

For most women, trying to orgasm when you’re stressed out or thinking about your daily to-do list is much like trying to fit a square peg in a round hole. It’s not going to happen. When you’re ready to start masturbating, spend some time to get yourself in the mood. Lock your door so you’re not worried about someone walking in and catching you in the act, take a bath, drink a glass of wine if you’re of age and just take some time to de-stress and let the thoughts of the day float away.

Fantasize

What makes you hot? Think about what turns you on and then do just that – think about it! Don’t be afraid to use props, such as erotic magazines, books or videos. Put on something soft and silky, or go naked if that’s what you like. Light candles with scents that relax you or turn you on. Whatever you choose to do, it just has to turn you on and get you thinking about pleasure.

Explore Your Body

Instead of just heading straight to your vulva, take some time to explore your entire body. If you’ve put on something soft and silky, try rubbing that across your skin. If you’re nude, take a silk scarf and rub it across your nipples. Touch your body, from your neck to your legs. When you touch somewhere that feels good, keep doing it! Try touching two places at once, such as touching your nipples and caressing lightly in between your legs.

Touch Yourself

When you’re ready to move to your vulva, begin touching yourself softly and slowly. Use one or two fingers to slowly massage your clitoris. Try using your palm too, and experiment with different pressures and speeds to find out what feels the best. This is where you’ll want to start using lots of lube! Many women don’t realize how much even just a little lube can make a difference in how masturbation feels. Try tickling yourself, tugging gently on your labia, or even inserting a finger or two in your vagina. Most women, however, will get more pleasure from clitoral stimulation during masturbation than they will vaginal.

Build Up The Sexual Tension

When you start feeling really aroused, back down a little bit and use a softer pressure or less speed to slow down and let the sexual tension build. Make the pleasure last as long as possible by not rushing to orgasm. When you feel like you’re on the brink, stop and do something else. When you’ve felt the pleasure subside a little, start building up again until you’ve reached the brink again. Keep doing this until you just can’t hold back anymore!

Remember To Breathe

A lot of women hold their breath when they start feeling pleasure, when they should be doing the exact opposite. Remember to breathe deeply and let the sexual energy flow through your body instead of trying to fight against it. Start building up a rhythm by rocking your pelvis against your hand. Try clenching your PC muscles (the muscles you use to stop the flow of urine) in tandem with rocking your pelvis and touching yourself.

Reaching Orgasm

When you’re at the brink of reaching orgasm but just can’t seem to make it over the edge, try giving yourself a little extra stimulation. Think about a really, super hot fantasy or use your fingers or a toy to insert into your vagina. You can also try pinching your nipples or caressing your anus.

Letting Yourself Go

When you begin to orgasm, continue doing exactly what you were doing when the orgasm started. Don’t stop! You’ll begin to feel waves of pleasure, and you may want to lighten your stimulation a little to feel the individual orgasmic waves. If this is the first time you’ve had an orgasm, it may feel like a blast of pleasure that seemed too short, but the more you masturbate and experience orgasms, the more you will begin to feel the different parts of an orgasm.

Practice, Practice, Practice

When it comes to masturbation, practice makes perfect. You may not reach orgasm on your first try, or you may not be quite satisfied with the first experience. Don’t give up! Try using a vibrator or dildo that will provide intense stimulation, or try rocking your pelvis against something like a pillow, a stuffed animal or even the corner of your bed. Try lots of different things and when you find something that you like, keep doing it! If something isn’t working for you, it’s time to give it up and try something else. With practice, you’ll find the masturbation methods that get you hot and bring you to orgasm every single time!

Filed Under: Masturbation Tagged With: female masturbation, female orgasm, how to masturbate, orgasm, sex tips

Q&A: Masturbation – Why Is It Taking So Long To Reach Orgasm?

By loveandsex

Reaching orgasm through masturbation is often easier for both men and women than it is reaching orgasm through intercourse or oral sex. That said, when it takes longer than usual to reach climax through masturbation, you may wonder if something is wrong with you. Here’s what to do if all of a sudden you notice it’s taking you significantly longer to get off when going solo.

Question: I am 15 and I masturbate often and only a week ago it on average took about 20 minutes to reach orgasm. All of a sudden starting the other night, it takes me approximately 1.5 – 2.5 hours, I didn’t change anything about the way I go about masturbating, so I am really confused as to this sudden jump, is this normal?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPby_x78Bh8[/youtube]

Changes In Your Life That Can Affect Masturbation

You may not have changed the way you masturbate at all, but other changes in your life can impact your ability to reach orgasm with masturbation and through intercourse and oral sex. Are you losing sleep or are you physically ill with a cold or perhaps the flu? Have you been super stressed out about something recently, such as a big test, moving or breaking up with your boyfriend or girlfriend? A lot of major life changes can affect how quickly you are able to reach orgasm, if at all. Fortunately, with most life situations, they are temporary and you will probably be able to get back to your normal masturbation routine once the stressor disappears.

Reaching Orgasm

Reaching orgasm, for both men and women, requires you to be calm, relaxed and have a clear mind. If you’re busy thinking about something that happened during the day or aren’t totally focused on the pleasure you’re giving yourself, it may take quite a bit longer for you to climax, or you may be unable to orgasm. This is especially true for women, but it can happen to men as well. If you’re not currently using visual stimulation during masturbation, give it a try. A picture, magazine or video may be all you need to distract your mind from day to day junk and instead allow you to focus on the task at hand – no pun intended.

Seeing Your Doctor

If you truly suspect something is wrong with your ability to reach orgasm through masturbation, and you can’t find any reason why masturbating is taking unusually longer than it has in the past, go see your doctor. You don’t have to be afraid to talk to your doctor about sex or masturbation, because your doctor knows all about it. They’ve seen and heard everything! If you’re not comfortable with your current doctor, don’t hesitate to find a doctor you are comfortable with. Talk to your doctor about what is going on and how it is a problem in your life. Your doctor can help find the causes of your inability to reach orgasm quickly through masturbation and find out if there is a true medical reason behind it or not. It never hurts to get an opinion from your doctor when you’re having an issue with your health – sexual or otherwise.

Filed Under: Masturbation Tagged With: how to masturbate, masturbation, orgasm, sex advice

Q&A: How Can I Control My Excessive Masturbation Habit?

By loveandsex

Masturbation is normal for both men and women, as well as teens and young adults. It’s a healthy part of any sex life! But how often can you masturbate without it being “too much?” How do you know if you’re masturbating is getting excessive? Here’s how to control your masturbation if you find that getting off starts taking over your life.

Question: I am 17 years old and i think i am masturbating too much, like 3 times a day – 18 times a week or less! Please help me, how can I control myself?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rJLl7OqEPbM[/youtube]

Is The Indicator Of A Masturbation Addiction Really Frequency?

Many people are under the assumption that the real indicator of a masturbation addiction is how often you masturbate, but there are many people who masturbate several times per day or more and don’t have an addiction to it at all. So what is the real indicator of a masturbation addiction? Start digging deeper and asking yourself some important questions. Do you find that masturbation is taking over your life? Do you masturbate instead of doing other things that you enjoy doing, or do you masturbate instead of taking care of your responsibilities to yourself and others? The true indicator of a sex addiction is not how often you do it, but how it is affecting the other aspects of your life and the lives of those around you.

Why Do You Masturbate So Often?

Saying that you masturbate often only because it feels good or because you’re bored probably isn’t the real reason you are masturbating a lot. There are often emotional reasons behind frequent masturbation, such as being lonely or stressed, or having ended a relationship that was important to you. Daily masturbation makes a very effective escape mechanism, but it can quickly become addicting as you look to escape your problems more and more often. Think about what is going on in your life emotionally that may be causing you to masturbate excessively. Finding the actual root of the problem is one of the first steps to breaking the bad habit.

Breaking The Habit

If masturbation begins taking over your life and you fear you may have a very real sex addiction, it’s time to break the habit. Try using the “rubber band trick,” which involves wearing a rubber band around your wrist and snapping it when you begin to think of masturbating and then immediately thinking of something else. If you find that you masturbate at certain times during the day, try making plans to do other things during that time of the day instead. It won’t be easy, and it will take some real effort on your part. But it’s not impossible. If you’ve tried breaking the masturbation addiction on your own, don’t be afraid to ask for help from a qualified therapist or counselor with whom you feel comfortable with. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s actually the opposite. It takes a lot of strength to admit you have a problem, but it’s one of the first steps to real recovery.

Filed Under: Masturbation Tagged With: how to masturbate, masturbation, sex advice, sexual addiction

Q&A: Does Masturbation Reduce Penis Sensitivity?

By loveandsex

As you get older, your body changes and mature in a variety of ways which sometimes can be a surprise. As you age, your sexual organs and libido change as well, and you might find yourself wanting more or less sex or finding that masturbation feels different than when you were younger. Other factors change genital sensitivity as well, such as medication or frequency of masturbation.

Question: Dear Dan and Jenn, I’ve been masturbating since I was 9 and since I turned 18, the the sensitivity of my penis started to change and now its takes me longer to reach orgasm. I wanted to know does masturbation reduce the sensitivity of the penis or is that the intensity of orgasm changes overtime as you get older?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBBp-GsE0Ic[/youtube]

Hormonal Changes

When you hit puberty, your hormones go into overdrive and you may find that your penis is extremely sensitive and can be aroused by even the smallest trigger. As you age, your body stops producing so many hormones and you’ll find that your penis isn’t as sensitive as it was when you were going through puberty. Although this sounds like it’s a bad thing (after all, who doesn’t want a sensitive penis) it’s actually a good thing. Did you really want to be getting erections at the wrong time throughout your life, or even suffering from premature ejaculation? The reduction of penis sensitivity as you get older is preparing you for a healthy and happy sex life in the future.

Frequency Of Masturbation

How often you masturbate plays a big part in how sensitive your penis is. If you masturbate only once a week or even less, you’ll find that your penis is more sensitive to other triggers. However, if you masturbate daily or even a few times a day, your penis isn’t going to respond to every little thing that touches it. This can actually be used to your advantage. If you want a more sensitive penis, masturbate less. Frequent masturbation helps prevent getting erections at the wrong time, and can be used before a first date or other event.

Other Factors That Change Penis Sensitivity

Other things that can change your penis sensitivity and sexual desire are prescription medications, illegal drugs and alcohol. These things can change your penis sensitivity very drastically, even to the point of making it difficult to get an erection or causing you to lose your erection when masturbating. It is not at all uncommon for prescription medications to change genital sensitivity and libido a great deal and if you suspect that your medications are to blame for a less sensitive penis or a reduced sex drive, talk to your doctor about it and find out if you can make a medication switch. Penis sensitivity can also change between intercourse and masturbation, or how long it’s been since you’ve had sex or masturbated. If you find that your penis is becoming drastically less sensitive and it is causing you to have problems in your sex life or with your partner, visit your doctor to rule out any medical causes.

Filed Under: Masturbation Tagged With: how to masturbate, masturbation, orgasm, sex advice

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