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The 3 Biggest Female Turn-Offs In Bed

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Most sex advice will tell you how to turn a woman ON, but not what you need to avoid. Most of the time, sex advice will go on about techniques to please a woman, but they fail to tell you what not to do to keep her from throwing you off her and walking out the door. Steer clear of these three major issues women have with guys during sex and you’re home free.

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Every Woman Is Different

There are tons of different turn-ons and turn offs when it comes to women. Each woman has her own set of things that turn her on, like foreplay or oral sex, and things that turn her off. These things will differ from woman to woman. However, there are some things that men do when getting it on that most women don’t like. When you’re with a girl for a period of time, you’re going to learn her specific likes and dislikes. However, you can be pretty sure that every woman isn’t going to like these three things:

Being Excessively Polite In Bed

Weak, wimpy guys do not turn women on. In fact, quite the opposite! So if you’re excessively polite in the sack, saying things like “Please can I do this,” or “What do you think about this” is going to turn her off completely. Instead, focus on being confident and assertive during sex. Girls prefer a strong, confident guy who knows what he wants to a guy who is constantly worried about what he’s doing or if he’s doing it wrong.

Examples Of What Not To Do

  • Asking permission for everything in bed.
  • Never showing any dominant, masculine energy.
  • Apologizing for anything while getting busy.

Just because you’re being strong and masculine doesn’t mean you need to treat a woman badly. You can still be dominant and assertive while still being loving and caring towards her. Being a jerk towards her doesn’t make you confident – it just makes you a jerk. Show girls your confidence by knowing what you want and knowing how to give a woman an orgasm.

Lack Of Emotion During Sex

Very few sex advice manuals out there talk about how to be emotional while knocking boots. They’re mostly technique driven, teaching you how to touch a woman’s clitoris or finger her g-spot. However, technique is only going to get you so far. Women are emotional creatures, and experience emotion deeply when getting busy. It’s just part of their nature. Failing to show emotion and acting like a robot while getting it on isn’t going to win you any points, even if you can touch her exactly the way the sex advice book you read told you to.

Don’t be afraid to show your emotional side when making love. Let pleasure, pain or ecstasy overcome you and let it out. Let it show on your face and in your voice. Let yourself be consumed by the moment instead of being focused on every technique you learned. A woman wants to experience that with you, and she wants to know that she’s doing a good job pleasing you.

Ways To Show Emotion

  • Make noises while making love.
  • Talk romantically to her or use dirty talk if she’s into it.
  • Show emotional vulnerability inside and outside the bedroom.

Going Straight For The Gold

Another big faux pas when getting it on – and perhaps the biggest complaint among women – is when a guy goes straight for the gold. He comes in, does his thing, has an orgasm and rolls over and goes to sleep. Chances are, you’re not going to get laid by this woman again. She will think you don’t care about her and only cared about yourself and your pleasure.

Instead, focus on her pleasure first. Give her oral sex before you even have intercourse with her. Read sex advice manuals and learn new techniques to bring her pleasure. Combine new techniques with being confident and emotional, and you’ll have her completely wrapped up in you. She’ll want to get busy with you all the time!

When you find new ways to turn her on and pleasure her, you’re both going to get more nookie in the end. Experimenting with new ways to have fun and mix it up is going to keep her interested in having sex with you. If you use the same techniques over and over, she’s going to get bored and want to find something – or someone – else to do. Always be learning new techniques to keep things fresh and exciting.

Women’s Masturbation Secrets – REVEALED!

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I have some shocking news. Girls like to masturbate. Of course they do, masturbation is really fun! They masturbate far more than you give them credit for. In fact, for a shockingly large amount of women, that is the only way they can achieve orgasm. While you’re aimlessly poking around down below, she’s thinking, “Whatever, just fake it so he’ll stop. I can take care of myself later.” This is not because of your inadequacies as a lover, nor is it unfixable. It’s simply a lack of understanding how her body works.

Men and women experience sex in very differently. For men it’s relatively easy: see woman, want to have sex with woman, hopefully penis will touch woman. Obviously that is an oversimplification, but, compared to the woman’s experience, that’s all it is. If you develop a better understanding of how women satisfy themselves, perhaps it would seem less complicated.

She Creates A Mood

In order to achieve orgasm, a woman needs the right atmosphere. She doesn’t light candles and get out the satin sheets every time she masturbates; she just needs to feel comfortable. If not, she can’t concentrate on the task at hand, so to speak. If she is too cold or too exposed or too anything that distracts her pleasure, it’s not going to happen. That sounds daunting, but finding the right ambient balance isn’t too difficult if her mind is calm. Plus, extreme horniness will always overtake any environmental distractions.

She Sets A Pace

Regardless of the method, a woman fingers herself rhythmically. Meaning, there is an even flow of strokes and caresses, allowing her to concentrate on the sensations each touch gives. A choppy technique can be distraction. Whereas a man responds to physical stimulation alone, a woman puts herself into an almost meditative state. Otherwise, no amount of touching will induce orgasm. Again, this sounds quite complicated to men, but a woman does know how to adjust her focus in different situations.

She Has A Specific Technique

All women have that one sure-fire orgasm making technique. This is not to say that a woman has only one way of satisfying herself, but she does have a method that guarantees her orgasm. I know that you are hoping that I’m about to tell you what it is, but I’m not. It is as diverse as ladies themselves. Some women like direct manual stimulation of the head of the clitoris, but some ladies are far too sensitive and require indirect stimulation. There are even girls who can get off just by rubbing their inner thighs. Whatever her technique, find out what it is, and learn to employ it in given situations.

She Uses A Vibrator

Many girls start out using their fingers during masturbation, but it doesn’t take long for them to graduate to sex toys when they get older. Once a woman tries a vibrator, there’s often no going back – simply because a vibrator offers pleasure whenever she wants it and can make her orgasm fast and hard. Girls are busy ladies after all, and they don’t always have time to sit around and finger themselves for an hour until they reach climax. Instead, using a vibrator can help her get things done quickly, with just as much – if not more – pleasure than if she used her hands alone.

She Reads Erotic Novels

Men look at porn when they masturbate, but women don’t respond to visual stimuli the way men do. They prefer to use their imaginations to think about sex and different sexual scenarios that turn them on. Sometimes, women can do this on their own without any help at all, but other times, she may enjoy reading a romantic or erotic novel before she masturbates or while she’s doing it. Girls love using erotic novels for masturbation because it really gets their biggest sexual organ involved – their brain!

She Does It More Than Once

If a girl reaches orgasm through masturbation once, it’s likely that she’ll do it again a few times before she’s thoroughly finished. Many times, girls will experience their first round of multiple orgasms through masturbation, simply because they stop after the first orgasm but realize they don’t feel quite done yet. Unlike men, girls don’t go back down to an unaroused state after their first orgasm. Instead, they go back to the “plateau” phase – which comes after the foreplay phase but before the orgasmic phase. That makes it much easier for her to reach orgasm again after the first time!

3 Ways Pocket Vibrators Will Blow Your Mind!

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Sex toys don’t have to be huge to get you off. Large sex toys often aren’t practical – they can be heavy and cumbersome to use, difficult to travel with and may use a lot of batteries or require plugging in to a wall outlet to operate. Often, better orgasms come in small packages! Here are three ways small vibrators will rock your world!

As a woman that likes to have things on demand (my favorite movies recorded, microwave meals in my fridge) I love to have a toy that is as instantly practical as it is tingly. Gyrating rabbits, and dildos that resemble the Incredible Hulk’s forearm, are all well and good for being stowed away at home; but are not the easiest of items to sneak away for a dirty weekend, or keep in your handbag.

Pocket-sized vibrators are the latest weapon in your arousal arsenal that will help you, and maybe a lucky male partner, enjoy naughty games on the go.

Hide It

As a ‘modern woman’ I reserve the right to masturbate at the office, the gym, or on my way to my boyfriend’s apartment; problem is all of those bright pink, spikey vibrators aren’t the easiest things to just ‘tuck away’ in the pocket of your handbag.

Pocket vibrators however, often come craftily disguised though as an unassuming article: there are the ‘butter fingers’ that look (ok, not that convincingly) like a candy bar; and then there are the ‘ lipstick vibe’s’. These small vibrators are sneakily shaped like a common place lipstick but conceal a naughty secret. Whether you’re more likely to have a candy bar or a lipstick in your handbag; there are pocket vibrators out there with enough stealth to make it through security at the airport; or your mother-in-law glaring into the contents of your carry on.

Play With It

Every girl should have a bullet!

These little devils are often only the size of the tip of your thumb but pack a punch. When inserted onto your clitoris they can vibrate so specifically that you’ll shudder more than with larger (and clumsier) vibrators.

Remote bullets are probably your best bet for fun and games with a deviant other half. Give your (lucky) boyfriend the remote control to adjust the speed and frequency of your vibrations; and then just pop the bullet into your panties. You can make this part of your normal foreplay routine; but I think it’s best to play some games instead.

If he wants to watch the football when you want some attention; get him to control your vibrations ‘remotely’ from the couch as you relax on your bed. Who knows he may even realize it would make great sense to join you during the commercial break!

In fact with a bullet you can forget ever having to have him cry ‘honey, dinner!!’ and get him to ‘buzz’ you instead.

Vary It

Bullets also come in a few other varieties. Some of them are not remotely controlled but instead there is a cable that connects the bullet to the remote; much like you might have seen with vibrating cock rings. Something about wires is distinctly ‘unsexy’. However, if you’re using a bullet during sex to stimulate your clitoris it does stop the two small parts becoming separated: let’s face it, it would be a tragedy that if in the heat of the moment you lost the remote to your favorite toy down the side of your bed!

Durex’s bullet variant is a slightly stranger design. The ‘play touch finger’ resembles those fake ‘witch fingers’ that you once cracked out as a kid over Halloween before you went trick or treating. Its design means that a soft rubber ‘finger’ slides over your own index finger, on the end of which is a bullet.

The bullets themselves are individually battery operated which means that they pack a punch. However, whatever genius worked out that Durex’s pocket vibrator design gave the most “Kapow” was severely let down by a designer who failed to realize that masturbating with a huge, synthetic finger puppet is just plain weird.

Boost It

The ‘play touch finger’ is also something I’d be too chronically embarrassed to pull out in front of a partner (though it feels so good I could probably overlook its ugliness when I’m alone… and blindfolded). So it misses out the best use of pocket vibrators; that they add spice to your sex life, without making your partner feel seconded to seven inches of silicone.

If you’re new into your relationship and don’t know how your other half feels about sex toys, these discreet little weapons will allow you to introduce some more buzz to the bedroom without referencing ‘Crocodile Dundee’, “You call that a vibrator? THIS is a vibrator!”

Pocket sized vibrators can be chucked casually into your over night bag and brought out at the crucial moment to ensure your orgasm. The clitoris is notoriously hard to stimulate during missionary (unless someone’s hand can be taken away from balance to be put down there). But the bullet is much smaller than your frenzied fingers and can slot comfortably between you and your partner as he penetrates you.

These ‘magic’ bullets are then well worth adding to, or beginning, your sex toy collection. In fact if you’re a woman who likes her orgasms clitoral, they’re invaluable.

And if you’re a forward thinking man who likes to please women, or want to know how to really tease a girl in a club, then they’re not only small enough to fit in a handbag: but can be slotted into a wallet too.

Sex Toys: Man Vs. Vibrator

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Sex toys are great, but REAL sex is better, right?

In very recent human history, discussion of women’s sexuality has become increasingly acceptable, and her gratification is becoming just as important as a man’s. We are studying the female body more closely, unlocking the secrets to pleasure centers of which we had little previous knowledge. You can practically get a vibrator on every street corner (it’s true, they sell them at American Apparel). And vibrators are vastly superior to men at producing orgasms.

Vibrators Are Not Obsessed With Their Own Penises

The vibrator’s sole function is to get a woman off. It is not frantically poking away at her most sensitive bits muttering, “Come one, come on,” under its breath because it wants to get through her stupid orgasm as quickly as possible so it can get onto its own climax. Instead, a vibrator is very giving. It doesn’t care about it’s own pleasure, and it won’t rush a woman through sex just to get off. It is there for her and her alone.

They Never Complain About Her Smell

No vibrator has ever complained about the way she smells. Just as men are always obsessing about their size, women are worried about their vaginal odor. The fact that it doesn’t naturally taste like passion fruit doesn’t help the insecurity.  Many women have had men comment on their vaginal odor, even when they’re clean and fresh. Sex toys, on the other hand, won’t say a single word.

Let’s face it – your testicles don’t always smell like a bed of roses, now do they? Genitals – male or female – are usually trapped in a pair of pants all day and by the time you get home, you’re probably ready for a shower. Even after a shower, you’re genitals are going to smell like…well, genitals. If you’re uncomfortable with cunnilingus, that is fine. Just don’t make a big deal about how much you hate the taste or smell, or she’ll never be able to get wet with you again.

Vibrators Maintain A Rhythm

They don’t gently stroke her for a minute or two, then audibly sigh, and increase speed and pressure for another minute or two, and then again audibly sigh and repeat until her clit feels so attacked it’s running in fear. Contrary to general male practices, this is not the proper method of stimulation. The rhythm and pressure need to be consistent. It needs to start out slow and then increase as she gets more and more aroused, and many vibrators are programmed to do just this.

However fast or hard you do it depends on the woman and the day, but whatever it is, keep it going. Once you find something she really seems to like, make sure you stick to that move and only that move.  If you get too jerky she’ll be thinking, “What the hell is he doing?” and not, “Oh, this feels so good.” If you change it up, she’ll never reach orgasm. Worse, if you change it up just as she’s ready to climax, you’ll ruin everything.

You want relax her and allow her to appreciate the sensation. If you’re not creating a soothing rhythm, it interrupts her concentration. However, if she’s screaming, “Faster! Faster!” go ahead and speed up. If she’s giving you directions, make sure you follow them! Some men aren’t so lucky – so whatever she tells you to do, do it without complaint.

Her Vibrator Doesn’t Beg For Sex

It just shows up and does its job when she needs it. If she’s had a long day, or if she’s in the middle of something, or if she’s just plain tired, her vibrator will not whine or complain or try to guilt her into using it. Her vibrator patiently waits for HER to be ready. When she is feeling horny, her vibrator has not irritated her to the point of being inutile in relation to her pleasure. And her vibrator has probably lasted longer than most of her relationships.

A Sex Toy Can’t Replace Intimacy

No matter how great sex toys are, they’re not going to replace the much needed intimacy between a man and a woman. This is where YOU come out ahead! So don’t be more concerned with your own orgasm than hers and don’t complain about how she smells or tastes. Maintain a steady rhythm and don’t pressure her to get busy when she doesn’t want to. If you do all of these things AND give her a great emotional connection, she may never go back to her vibrator again.

Dry Orgasms – Do You Suffer From Retrograde Ejaculation?

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An orgasm doesn’t always involve ejaculation. When most men climax, fluid is expelled from their penis. However, some men don’t always expel ejaculatory fluid when they climax. What happens when a man has a normal orgasm sometimes and doesn’t ejaculate at other times? Where does the semen go?

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Is There Such A Thing As A Dry Orgasm?

It is commonly thought that men will ejaculate every time they have an orgasm, but scientific studies and reports from men across the globe have proven otherwise. It is possible for a man to have an orgasm apart from ejaculation – meaning, that although a man has experienced a climax, no fluid is expelled from the penis during the orgasm.

This is especially true if a man is able to have multiple orgasms. Since it takes about fifteen to twenty minutes for a man to produce more ejaculatory fluid, if he has another orgasm within this time frame, it will most likely be “dry” or without semen.

What Is Retrograde Ejaculation?

A “dry” orgasm can mean that a man simply has not produced ejaculate during that particular climax, but it can also mean that a man did produce ejaculatory fluid during the orgasm and that it just didn’t end up coming out of the penis.

So where did it go?

With retrograde ejaculation, the semen is expelled from the testicles, but does not travel through the urethra and out the penis. Instead, the fluid goes up and into the bladder. For men who experience this problem, it’s not always consistent, so it’s a little harder to figure out what exactly is going on. For example, a man who experiences multiple orgasms and has a “dry” orgasm, he probably isn’t experiencing retrograde ejaculation. It is possible for no ejaculatory fluid to be released at all during climax. However, a man that is simply having normal sex and sometimes ejaculates and sometimes doesn’t probably is.

A urinalysis test is needed to confirm the presence of semen inside the bladder to determine whether or not a man is experiencing actual retrograde ejaculation.

What Causes Retrograde Ejaculation?

A common cause of this condition is when teenagers – hoping not to make a mess and get caught masturbating – pinch the tip of the penis and close off the urethra during orgasm. Also, some types of medications can cause retrograde ejaculation, including anti-depressant and anti-psychotic medications. Health conditions can also cause this condition, and rarely, an obstruction in the ejaculatory duct can prevent ejaculatory fluid from being released.

Although it isn’t technically harmful to pinch the tip of the penis right before ejaculation to prevent semen from being expelled, it can be uncomfortable and you may end up having a much less satisfying orgasm than if you had simply let it go. If you’re worried about making a mess, masturbate in the shower (it goes right down the drain) or use toilet paper or facial tissue to catch your semen when you ejaculate.

Is Retrograde Ejaculation Harmful?

When a man experiences retrograde ejaculation, it’s not going to harm his body at all. There is no damage done to the ejaculatory duct, the penis, the testicles or the bladder when this occurs. It’s not a dangerous condition to have, however, that doesn’t mean that men shouldn’t be concerned about it:

  • Many men who experience this condition report that orgasms are much less pleasurable when the semen is redirected to the bladder instead of being expelled from the penis. Sex is supposed to be pleasurable – and you want to make it as good as you can!
  • Men with retrograde ejaculation may become infertile – but whether that’s due to the fact that the semen simply doesn’t come out (after all, the sperm have to come out of the penis and travel up the vagina to fertilize an egg) or that the process of redirection into the bladder makes a man infertile over time is unknown.

What Should You Do If You Have Dry Orgasms?

If you experience a dry orgasm outside of having multiple orgasms, whether it happens seldom or frequently, seek the advice of your doctor. If you’re not comfortable enough with your current doctor to talk about this, find a new one! Your doctor is best equipped to deal with this sort of condition, and he or she has the tests available at hand to confirm whether you’re really experiencing retrograde ejaculation or not.

Once you get a confirmation on whether you have the condition or not, you can begin talking to your doctor about real options that are available to you.