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Online Dating – How To Tell The Real Deal From A Total Fake

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Here’s the thing with online dating and chat lines – some people are honest, and really want to find their mate, while others are there only to mess with people or worse – hurt them in some way. It’s better to play it safe when dating online, but it can be difficult to know if the person you’re dating has ulterior motives or not. Here’s how you can know for certain!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OQsa3d6WO-c[/youtube]

Always Trust Your Dating Instincts

Your dating instincts are the most powerful tool at your disposal for spotting a bad online dating profile or to tell if someone is lying to you. You definitely don’t want to underestimate your gut feelings and do something that the little voice in the back of your head is telling you not to do. If your gut is telling you that there’s something fishy going on, don’t ignore it!

Online dating can be especially challenging because your brain fills in the things you don’t know – with how you want the other person to be. You may be tempted to ignore the alarm bells that are going off because he or she is saying everything right, but if you sense that something isn’t right, it probably isn’t. They be really sweet, caring and seem perfect, but if your instinct is telling you to run, do it. There are other sweet, awesome people that you will meet online that won’t make you feel weird.

Keep An Eye Out For Lies

When dating online, keep an eye out for inconsistencies in their stories. Liars will almost always get tripped up in their lies, especially if they lie often. It’s often hard to keep lies straight, so the man or woman you’re dating may say one thing one time and say something completely different another time without even knowing it. If he says he hates football when you first talk to him and later he says he has to get to a game (or watch a game), that’s probably just the surface of the lies he’s telling you.

Keep an eye out for conflicting information about looks, hobbies, habits, friends, etc. Also, don’t be afraid to call them out on something that you’re not sure about – remember, you don’t them anything. You barely know them! If you come across an inconsistency in something they’ve said or done, speak up. Ask them about it. If they get flustered and can’t provide a good answer for you as to why they said one thing and did another (or whatever the situation may be), then you’ve probably caught them in a lie.

If It Sounds Too Good To Be True, It Usually Is

It’s hard to keep your ground when you’re being swept off your feet, but if the relationship seems too good to be true, it often is. It’s important to try to keep a level head when dating online or over a chat line, because if it seems like you’ve suddenly met Mr. or Mrs. Right and everything in your life is falling into place, you’re probably falling too hard for something that is definitely too good to be true.

A total fraud will try their absolute best to woo you, and if you’ve been looking for love for quite some time, it can be hard to resist someone who is doing and saying all of the right things. It’s important to stay vigilant when dating though, because something that seems perfect probably isn’t. A fake is probably working very hard to get you into their good graces so they can achieve whatever their goal is – whether that’s simply yanking people around or luring them into a trap that could cause you to end up in some very dangerous situations.

Try your best to keep your cool when you’re chatting online and don’t get too wrapped up in sweet phrases or gestures. Accept the niceties gracefully, but always keep your “weirdness radar” on so you can spot red flags right away. If the guy or girl you’re dating online seems totally perfect for you, take it with a grain of salt until they prove they are the real deal. Consider taking it offline, but make sure you take some safety precautions first such as meeting in public the first several times and letting a friend know where you’re going, who you’re going to be with and when you’ll be back. Once your date proves their motives are pure, you can relax (a little!)

Q&A: Condoms – What Size Do I Need?

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Condom shopping isn’t always easy because condoms come in a variety of different shapes and sizes. Condom sizes also differ from manufacturer to manufacturer, so it can be difficult to determine the best size for you in a particular brand. Getting the right size for you is important, because an ill fitting condom can reduce pleasurable sensations during sex at best or slip off and increase the risk of transmitting STD’s and unwanted pregnancy. Here’s how to find out what size YOU need!

Question:  According to a condom size chart I’m 5 inches long erect. What condom size do I need?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQ6CgYK05H4[/youtube]

Basic Condom Size Guidelines

If you look on the back of a condom box, each manufacturer provides basic guidelines on how large a condom is, in both length and width. You’ll also be able to find out what material it is made from and whether it comes lubricated or not. They may also provide information on how thick it is, so you can choose the thickness that provides the best and most pleasurable sensations. Most people will choose the thinnest condom that is available because this tends to allow both partners to feel more friction than their thicker counterparts. While getting a thin condom may help make sex better for you and your partner, it is much more important that you get the correct size, as this will make the biggest difference. Looking at the manufacturer’s specifications will give you a general idea of how large it is, and you can compare it to how large your penis is after you’ve measured it. Like most things though, the size of a condom will differ somewhat between manufacturers. An XL in one brand is not going to fit the same as an XL in another brand. Accurately measuring your penis and purchasing the correct size for it is an important part of having safer sex and preventing sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies.

Making Sure The Condom Fits Comfortably

When a condom is stretched lengthwise, it is much more stretchy and resilient than if it is stretched widthwise. Keep this in mind when going shopping – unless you have a very long penis, you’ll want to judge it mostly by its width, since there won’t be much give in that respect. You will be much more comfortable in one that fits the width of your penis properly! A condom that fits well lengthwise should actually be a little longer than your penis, with enough space at the tip to hold your semen when you orgasm. A condom that fits comfortably is going to benefit you and your partner during sex in many more ways than you would think. You (and your partner) will enjoy sex more, because one that doesn’t fit right will either hug you too tightly and cause discomfort or be too loose and decrease the pleasurable sensations from having sex.

Giving Condoms A Test Drive

A great way to find out which condoms fit you well and which don’t is to purchase a variety of them and give each one a test drive. Once you have a basic idea of how they should fit, you’ll be able to decide which one fits best on you and feels better for your partner. Many stores that sell sex toys also offer several different types of “variety packs” which give you one or two of each type of condom for you to try. It may seem silly, but don’t be afraid to take notes about which ones feel better than others and which condoms your partner seems to like the best. Once you determine which one is the right one for you, it will become your “go to” condom. Keep a good supply of your favorite one available, but don’t keep them in your wallet, your jeans pockets or your car. Women should not keep condoms in their purses unless they are protected by a hard case of some kind. The friction caused by a pair of pants or a wallet can cause the wrapper to degrade, possibly making holes in the wrapper and compromising the integrity of the condom. Keeping it in your car will expose the material to extreme heat and cold, possibly causing the latex or polyurethane to degrade, thereby decreasing it’s effectiveness at preventing pregnancy and reducing the risk of transmitting STD’s. Your best bet is to keep condoms stored in a cool, dry place to keep it “fresher” longer. Always inspect the wrapper thoroughly before using it for tears or holes.

Q&A: Dating Tips – How Do I Know If He’s Just In It For The Sex?

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Guys love sex. It’s just a fact of life. But if you’re with a guy who only seems to want to have sex or make out, you might be wondering if he’s only in the relationship for the sex. If you think he only cares about getting in between the sheets with you, there are some questions you can ask yourself to better understand the situation and his true motives. Here’s what to do if you think he’s only interested in sex, so you can figure out if that’s really what is going on or if he’s just a normal guy who can’t stop thinking about it.

Question: How do I know if a guy really loves and respects me, or if he is just into sex and making out?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0XOzOR43vJQ[/youtube]

All Guys Are Into Sex And Making Out – Don’t Hold It Against Him

If you think he’s only in the relationship for sex just because he wants to have sex or make out all the time, you could be very, very wrong. Most – if not all – guys are very into sex and making out and it’s constantly on their minds. He may really enjoy being in a relationship with you and may care a lot about you, but he may not be able to control his mind when it comes to thinking about you naked. Don’t hold it against him just because he loves sex, oral sex, kissing, making out and anything with you that involves getting to feel you up. Many girls think that if they want to find out if their guy only cares about the sex, they can withhold sex and see if he still enjoys hanging out with her. This is totally unfair to him! Don’t punish him – instead, there are some questions you can ask yourself that will give you a better handle on the situation without hurting your guy unnecessarily.

How To Tell If He’s Only In It For The Sex

If you’re really beginning to think that he only wants to be with you because he likes having sex with you, here are a few questions to ask yourself:

  • Do you engage in other activities with him?
  • How does he treat you outside the bedroom?
  • How does he treat you in front of friends and family?
  • Do you hang out together with his friends and your friends?
  • Is he truly interested in what you have to say or what is going on in your life?
  • Do you communicate outside the bedroom?
  • Does he call you late at night, only for booty calls?
  • Does he come by only for sex?

If he does ok on most of these questions, then he probably enjoys both being in a relationship with you or dating you and having sex with you. Guys that only want sex will tend not to hide it very well at all – men are definitely not masters of hiding their motives by nature. If that’s his game, he’ll basically meet up with you only for sex. He won’t try to fake it by alternating a nice date with a booty call – he’ll go straight for the booty call at 2 a.m. after he’s been partying with his friends all night. He won’t want to hang out with you in front of his friends, or hang out with yours at all. He won’t call or text you just to “chat.” He’ll almost always, if not every time, suggest sex right away. If you’re not up for hitting the sheets, he’ll make up an excuse later as to why he can’t hang out. No, Grandma really isn’t sick – he just found something better to do because you didn’t want to “do it.” If he spends time with you outside of the bedroom, hangs out with your friends and his (with you) and sometimes calls you just to say “hey,” he is probably not only in it for the sex – he’s just an ordinary guy who loves it and loves it with you!

What To Do If He Only Cares About Sex

If your guy fits the bill of someone who wants sex and only sex, stop and think about where you’re willing to go with this. Is the sex great and would you otherwise be single without any sex? Why not keep him as a booty call while you continue to date and look for the real deal? If you’re not into that, consider breaking it off with him. You don’t have to waste your time with someone who wants only sex unless that’s what you want too.

When You Have to Move Out

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We live in an age of cohabitation. It’s fairly common for boyfriends and girlfriends to move in together prior to marriage, especially in cities where rent is expensive and living alone proves financially impractical. That’s all fine and well as long the relationship is going great, but when a break up occurs, living together can make things that much more painful. Yet it would be crazy to stay in a bad relationship just to save on rent or avoid dividing up your things. Follow the advice ahead and the process will be as pain free as reasonably possible.

Who Will Be Moving Out?

The first very important thing to decide when a break up happens is who will be moving out from the house or apartment. Will one of you be staying and the other one leaving, or are you both going to move out to other places? If you decide that only one of you is leaving, the person at fault for the breakup needs to be the one to move to a new place. That means that the dumper should go, because the dump-ee may not have seen this coming. They don’t deserve to have their entire life thrown into upheaval, unless the dump-ee is truly at fault because they cheated or did something else equally as terrible. Then they should definitely be kicked out of the apartment or home. The other exception would be if the dumper owns the house solely in their name, in which case the dump-ee should move out. In that scenario, the dumper should take action to help the dump-ee find a place before making them leave the shared living space.

Divide Shared Possessions

Once you’ve decided who is staying and who has to go, you need to divide up anything that’s shared by both parties. This can be tough and lead to lot of arguing and fighting, but it is a completely necessary step. The best thing that you can do, especially if you’re the dumper or cause of the break up, is try to be as amicable as is possible. If there are items in your home that you both use, but only one of you paid for, the buyer should get first dibs on that item. If there are shared items that you paid for together, things get significantly more complex. The best solution here is to attempt to balance out the value of what you both end up with. If you and your significant other bought both the couch and the bed together, one of you should get the couch and the other the bed. If you know your now-ex really wants the bed, be the bigger person and take the couch. Even if you’re mad at each other, you’ll feel better about it in the end (and avoiding yet another argument doesn’t hurt, either).

What About Shared Friends And Shared Pets?

What if the shared item isn’t an item so much as an entity? If you have a pet together and can remain somewhat amicable, you can try to share the pet. Perhaps you can switch off who keeps it every other week or so, not unlike a divorced couple shares custody of their children. If the break up was too sour, and you can’t stand the idea of having an on-going link to your ex, then the person who was at fault needs to let the other person keep the pet. Ditto for shared friends. If you aren’t okay with seeing each other at group events that mutual friends are involved in, you either need to rotate events for awhile, or decide who gets to see which friends. That could easily be the most difficult discussion of your entire relationship, but it can prevent a lot of future drama (and you can still see these friends one-on-one as often as you wish).

In the end, if you make every effort to be the biggest person and think somewhat rationally during an otherwise emotional experience, you will greatly reduce the amount of drama involved with moving out after a breakup.

Q&A: Masturbation – Does It Make Sex Better?

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Just about everyone masturbates, starting from when they’re a teenager and continuing on into their adult life. It is perfectly healthy and normal for both men and women to masturbate regularly, but the question is, does it help improve your sex life? Does masturbating when you’re young make sex better when you’re older and does it also help make your sex life better when you’re alternating between having sex and pleasuring yourself?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tc91fWZ725E[/youtube]

How Masturbation Can Make Sex Worse – For Guys

When guys are growing up, they tend to learn how to masturbate and give themselves an orgasm in secret. In many cultures, where masturbation is taboo or considered “wrong,” nobody talks about how to masturbate or when to masturbate. As a result, many young men learn how to masturbate the wrong way and end up teaching their body the wrong things – and this will actually make your sex life worse when you do start to have sex. Usually, young men will masturbate in secret and do it quickly for fear of being caught – quite literally – with their pants down. This trains the body to reach orgasm too quickly, and can lead to problems with premature ejaculation when a man gets older and begins having sex. This can cause problems in a sexual relationship, because the sex just isn’t lasting long enough and his partner will often have to go without sexual satisfaction because there just wasn’t enough time before he reached climax.

How Guys – And Girls – Can Use Masturbation As A Sexual Training Tool

When done correctly, masturbation can be a great sexual training tool for both girls and guys. For guys, masturbating the right way can help him learn when he’s about to reach climax and teach him how to control his orgasm. When a man learns how to control his orgasm through masturbation, it will also allow him to control his orgasm during sex and better please his partner. To do this, go slow when masturbating. Get close to orgasm and back off a bit. Do this again and again until you’ve lasted as long as you can. Female masturbation will also help a woman learn more about her body and her sexuality. When a woman explores masturbation freely, she will learn how she likes to be touched and exactly where her hot spots are. This will help her to reach orgasm more easily during sex! Many girls who have never masturbated have actually never had an orgasm – simply because she’s not quite sure of how to get there. Guys in relationships with girls who have never masturbated can be equally as frustrated, because if she doesn’t know where and how to touch herself to have an orgasm, how is he supposed to know? If as a young guy or girl, you didn’t learn how to masturbate the right way, don’t worry too much about it. You can actually teach yourself to masturbate the right way right now!

Masturbation Is A Great Stress Reliever

Of course, having an orgasm is a huge stress reliever. That’s why people enjoy sex so much! Not only does it feel good while you’re doing it, but the body produces so many feel good hormones during sex that you’re definitely going to ride a “sex high” well after you’ve finished getting it on. Does this mean that if you’re single or aren’t having much sex with your partner that you are going to miss out on all the great benefits of having sex? Not hardly! Masturbation will create the same great after-sex feelings that sex does, because it’s simply a physiological response to the body having an orgasm. Masturbation will relieve stress much the same way that sex does, and can make you feel more confident in yourself and super sexy. Instead of using masturbation to “get off quickly” though, spend some time with yourself making yourself feel good. This will not only make your sex life better, it will also help get you in tune with your own sexuality. Make masturbation better by watching your favorite porn flick, or reading a steamy, erotic novel that really turns you on. Girls, touch your clitoris slowly, or use more lube if that is what feels good. Guys, the more lube you use, the better. Water based lube functions much better for masturbation than lotion or other substances. If you use masturbation to your advantage, you can make your sex life much, much hotter – whether you’re waiting to have sex or in a sexual relationship right now.