Love & Sex Answers

Today's #1 Love & Sex Resource

You are here: Home / Archives for loveandsex

Q&A: How Can I Make My Girlfriend Want To Kiss Me?

By

Your first kiss in a new relationship is an important milestone, whether you’ve had dozens of kisses before or have never kissed anyone at all. If you’re going for your first kiss in a new relationship, rushing your partner into it before she wants to can actually backfire on you. Here’s what to do if you’re ready – and she’s not.

Question: Dear Dan and Jenn, I recently got a girlfriend and I really want to kiss her, but she says she doesn’t want to kiss because  this is her first relationship and she doesn’t want to kiss until we are older. But I REALLY like her and I was wondering what I can do to make her want to kiss?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXI_N2cyE1k[/youtube]

Respect Her Boundaries

Whenever someone says “no” to something, you absolutely have to respect that. Regardless of whether they’re a guy or a girl or what stage your relationship is in, you simply can’t ignore someone if they’re telling you they’re uncomfortable doing something that you want them to do. This applies to kissing, as well as sex. If your partner isn’t ready to kiss you yet, you can’t try to push her past her boundaries. Instead, learn to respect these boundaries because if you were the one who wasn’t comfortable with something, you wouldn’t want her to pressure you about it.

Practice Patience

In any situation where your partner lets you know that they’re not ready to do something or aren’t comfortable with something, it’s important that you learn to practice patience. Having patience when your partner says “no” isn’t always easy, especially if she says “no” to something you want very badly, but it’s the right thing to do. Even if you’re convinced that kissing her will take your relationship to a new and exciting level and she’ll really like it once she tries it, if she’s not ready that’s it. It’s over. Try to fill your time with your partner with other fun things, like playing baseball together or hanging out with friends. If you find yourself tempted to kiss your partner often, plan things to do with her that don’t create quiet, awkward moments alone together. Avoid going to the movies where other people are making out and try to stay busy doing fun activities together so you don’t think so much about kissing her and instead you’re focusing on just being with her and having fun with her.

Could It Harm Your Relationship?

Pressuring your partner to kiss you before she is ready can actually do harm to your relationship. At first she will be annoyed, and then she will become frustrated with you and come to resent you for not respecting her wants and needs. Trying to talk her into doing something she’s made clear she’s uncomfortable with doesn’t win you any brownie points. Even if she gives in and gives you what you want in the end, chances are she’ll remember the hurt for a long time. This definitely has the potential to damage your relationship, so if you value what you have with your partner at all, you won’t pressure her to do something she’s just not ready for.

Q&A: What Does Sperm Taste Like?

By

When giving a blowjob, you know eventually the inevitable will happen. Your man will have an orgasm and you’ll have semen in your mouth. Many people are weirded out by the idea of sperm in their mouth, especially if they’ve heard horror stories from their girlfriends. So what does sperm really taste like, and is it harmful to swallow it?

Question: What does sperm taste like? Is it okay to swallow it? If so, can it do any harm?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KPT4z_B_VmU&feature=channel[/youtube]

What Affects The Taste Of Sperm

Not all sperm is equal. Every man’s semen tastes different and it may even have a different texture or an aftertaste too. There are a great deal of things that affect the flavor of a man’s ejaculate, from what they eat to how healthy they are. Smoking, drinking and doing drugs or taking prescription medications are often said to give semen a bad, bitter taste, while the semen of healthy men is said to taste cleaner. Just think about it this way – whatever you put into your body is coming out, via sweat, urine and yes, semen. Eating fresh fruits and vegetables is a great way to improve the taste of your semen, and many people report that pineapples and pineapple juice can make ejaculate taste exceptionally sweet.

What Do You Like?

Not only does every man’s semen taste different from each other, each woman has her own flavor preferences as well. Some women can’t stand the texture of semen, regardless of the taste while other women love the taste of semen and can’t seem to get enough of it. You may have preferred the taste of an ex-boyfriend’s semen while your current beau’s just doesn’t do it for you or vice versa. One woman may report that one man’s semen tastes good, while another women can report that the same man’s semen is very bitter and has a bad taste to it. It’s difficult to give semen a solid thumbs up or thumbs down as far as taste is concerned, because there are so many different variables to consider. It’s perfectly normal to want him to finish in your mouth or to dislike it, or even to like one man’s semen but not another’s. You just like what you like!

It’s Ok To Swallow

Swallowing semen is not harmful in and of itself, provided something extraordinary doesn’t happen such as choking on it, etc. Some people even report that semen is good for you, as it contains a great deal of protein. The taste of semen and whether to spit or swallow is a personal choice, because neither will have any harmful side effects. Never do something that makes you uncomfortable, regardless of how much your partner wants it, and if you don’t want to swallow that’s all there is to it. Just don’t. If swallowing is something that turns you on and it’s something you enjoy doing, go for it! Just remember that semen can and will carry sexually transmitted diseases if a person is infected, which can easily spread to you if you swallow the ejaculate. If you really want to swallow, make sure you’re being safe and your partner has passed an STD test first.

Q&A: It’s My First Time With Another Female

By

First time sex with a new partner is always nerve wracking. You don’t know what they like, they don’t know what you like and being nervous is just the icing on the cake. It can be especially nerve wracking if you’re having sex with another person of the same sex for the first time! Here’s how you can handle it and end up having a great time.

Question: Hey you two, my question would be me and my fiancé (who is also female) plans to come visit me in a few months and were planning on you know, doing adult things. Neither one of us has ever been with another female, so both of us are a little nervous about it. How do you get past the first time jitters?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VFGWPYcJEEM[/youtube]

Build An Intimate Bond

While you may be really nervous about having sex with your partner for the first time, take some time to focus on building an intimate bond when you first meet your partner. Go out to dinner, have a few glasses of wine and talk, just getting to know each other. Share stories with each other and allow yourself to get comfortable with your partner and vice versa. When you take the conversation home, play a fun sex game like 20 questions or Truth or Dare. Loosen up with your partner and allow yourself to laugh and have a good time before focusing so much on “doing it.” These kinds of sexy games are great at putting you and your partner at ease while setting the mood for a sexy evening with each other.

Remember To Have Fun

A lot of people in this situation end up taking themselves too seriously at first and that can make it even more awkward than it already is. Remember to have fun and relax, and let whatever happens happen. Take it slow, and don’t worry about putting pressure on your partner or yourself to perform. It’s not about getting it right or getting it perfect. Enjoy yourself with your partner and focus on having a good time, even if there are a few bumps along the way. Even if you don’t end up having sex right away or even the first night together, it’s ok. You’re in it for the long haul, so it’s ok to take your time and allow yourself to become comfortable with your partner and comfortable with the situation.

How To Please Another Woman

Learning how to please another woman isn’t difficult, it’s just intimidating. You already have a leg up on the competition, so to speak, because you’re a woman and you know how you like to be touched. Chances are, your partner will like something very similar. If you’re still not sure about how to please another woman, gather some resources on female orgasm and take the orgasm quiz. Read up on how exactly to please your partner move for move. Learning the specific techniques you can use in the bedroom with your partner will give you more confidence when the time comes.

Q&A: How Can I Control My Excessive Masturbation Habit?

By

Masturbation is normal for both men and women, as well as teens and young adults. It’s a healthy part of any sex life! But how often can you masturbate without it being “too much?” How do you know if you’re masturbating is getting excessive? Here’s how to control your masturbation if you find that getting off starts taking over your life.

Question: I am 17 years old and i think i am masturbating too much, like 3 times a day – 18 times a week or less! Please help me, how can I control myself?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rJLl7OqEPbM[/youtube]

Is The Indicator Of A Masturbation Addiction Really Frequency?

Many people are under the assumption that the real indicator of a masturbation addiction is how often you masturbate, but there are many people who masturbate several times per day or more and don’t have an addiction to it at all. So what is the real indicator of a masturbation addiction? Start digging deeper and asking yourself some important questions. Do you find that masturbation is taking over your life? Do you masturbate instead of doing other things that you enjoy doing, or do you masturbate instead of taking care of your responsibilities to yourself and others? The true indicator of a sex addiction is not how often you do it, but how it is affecting the other aspects of your life and the lives of those around you.

Why Do You Masturbate So Often?

Saying that you masturbate often only because it feels good or because you’re bored probably isn’t the real reason you are masturbating a lot. There are often emotional reasons behind frequent masturbation, such as being lonely or stressed, or having ended a relationship that was important to you. Daily masturbation makes a very effective escape mechanism, but it can quickly become addicting as you look to escape your problems more and more often. Think about what is going on in your life emotionally that may be causing you to masturbate excessively. Finding the actual root of the problem is one of the first steps to breaking the bad habit.

Breaking The Habit

If masturbation begins taking over your life and you fear you may have a very real sex addiction, it’s time to break the habit. Try using the “rubber band trick,” which involves wearing a rubber band around your wrist and snapping it when you begin to think of masturbating and then immediately thinking of something else. If you find that you masturbate at certain times during the day, try making plans to do other things during that time of the day instead. It won’t be easy, and it will take some real effort on your part. But it’s not impossible. If you’ve tried breaking the masturbation addiction on your own, don’t be afraid to ask for help from a qualified therapist or counselor with whom you feel comfortable with. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s actually the opposite. It takes a lot of strength to admit you have a problem, but it’s one of the first steps to real recovery.

Q&A: My Girlfriend Doesn’t Want Oral Sex

By

Oral sex is one of the greatest sexual gifts that someone can give another person because you’re focusing only on their pleasure and theirs alone. Many people enjoy the feeling oral sex more than penetration and intercourse, but what do you do if your partner doesn’t want to give or receive oral sex?

Question: My girlfriend & I are extremely happy with each other, but she is extremely against oral sex, she refuses to give me blow jobs and “doesn’t need” me to give her oral pleasure. Is there a way to make this work, because I’ve never had oral sex given to me or vise-versa. She said she would maybe possibly consider it while she is drunk, but that is honestly worthless to me because I want it to mean something.

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPW19Ghj-6w[/youtube]

Oral Sex And Hygiene

Many people who have issues with oral sex don’t necessarily have issues with performing oral sex itself, but rather, they have issues with hygiene. They may have had a bad experience before where they performed oral sex on someone and didn’t like the way it tasted or smelled. Fortunately, hygiene issues are fixable. Make sure that you are always clean and showered, use deodorant and cologne if she likes it. Keep your genital area clean and trimmed, and if you’re uncircumcised, make sure you clean underneath the foreskin. Encourage her to lick or kiss around your thighs and tummy. When she gets close enough, she’ll know that you’re clean and fresh and may feel more comfortable with oral sex.

Getting Comfortable With Oral Sex

For a woman, being on the receiving end of cunnilingus can be emotionally uncomfortable. Essentially, she has to open herself up physically and emotionally to you, allowing you to be face to face with her most intimate and sensitive parts. This is enough to make any woman uncomfortable and it may be the reason she wants to get drunk first. If you want to perform oral sex on your partner, the first thing you need to do is get her relaxed. Draw her a hot bath, give her a massage and kiss and lick in that general area to see how she responds. Go slow and don’t rush her.

Communicate With Your Partner

An aversion to oral sex isn’t always what it seems on the surface. She may have some deep rooted issues about oral sex that makes her feel the way she does about it, such as abuse. These emotional roots may go deeper than either you or her expect, and she may not even remember why she started not liking oral sex to begin with. Communicate with her and talk about why she doesn’t feel comfortable with getting or giving oral sex. Just listen to her, and find out where her boundaries are. Don’t criticise her, and allow her to open up and feel that you are there for her. This in and of itself may be what it takes to get her to feel like you are trustworthy enough to experience oral sex with! Just remember never to push her or make her do something she doesn’t want to do.