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Q&A: Tips For Talking Dirty – With Examples

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Talking dirty is a great way to spice up your sex life with your partner. However, many people are uncomfortable with talking dirty, are embarassed about it or aren’t sure what to say. How can you do dirty talk without sounding ridiculous? Here’s how to talk dirty in the bedroom with your partner, with some sexy examples!

Question: Hi Dan and Jenn, do you have any tips for dirty talk? My boyfriend is really into it, but I have no idea what I’m supposed to say without sounding like a washed-up porn star. Please help!

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uPfGwt6z_lY[/youtube]

Talking Dirty Got A Bad Rap

Talking dirty isn’t “dirty.” Actually, it can be quite sexy and a lot of people enjoy talking during sex. Talking dirty in the bedroom got a bad rap because back in the day, it wasn’t considered “polite” or “proper” to talk that way during relations. Fortunately, society has come a long way sexually since those days but the fact that sexy talk is considered “taboo” in the bedroom is half the fun! If your partner wants to hear you talk dirty to him during sex, it’s time to learn how.

Ways To Talk Dirty

There are lots of ways to talk sexy to your partner, and not all of it has to be during the actual act of sex. You can talk sexy to your partner over the phone, or via text, called sexting. Send him a racy email to find at a random time, or leave a hot note by the coffee that he can find before he goes to work (which will get him hot for you all day!) These are also great ways to “break the ice” when it comes to dirty talk, because it’s a lot easier to send a dirty text at first than to jump right in to talking dirty during sex.

Get Comfortable With Talking Dirty

Remember that when talking dirty, your partner is going to appreciate the effort. Even if you don’t sound super sexy at first because you’re still getting comfortable with it, he’ll be glad you tried. Try practicing talking dirty to yourself in the mirror at first, because if you can’t talk sexy to yourself in the mirror, how are you going to do it to him? If you’re unsure of what to say in the bedroom, start by talking about what feels good, why it feels good or describing how it feels. Get some ideas from an erotic book. Yes, some of them are cheesy but there are a lot of good, realistic erotic novels that can give you an idea of exactly what to say. When you feel more comfortable with the idea of talking dirty in the bedroom, take a little time to find out exactly what gets your partner off. What are his fantasies when it comes to dirty talk? Does he like it a certain way? Don’t be afraid to ask him questions or use a “fantasy box.” Your efforts will be much more effective if you’re talking dirty right up his alley.

How To Date A Single Parent

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You are jogging in the park one sunny morning, when you find yourself keeping time with a beautiful woman. She smiles, you smile, and eventually, when you slow down, you ask her out on a date. “Sure,” she says, “but can I bring my kid along?” Eek! Don’t worry. This is not typical of single parents, although that seems to be a big fear in the minds of kid-less folks. Here’s what it’s like to really date a single parent.

Finding The Time

Regardless of whether or not you like kids, you may find yourself in a situation where you are drawn to single mom. Depending on your depth of emotion for this person, you may decide it is worth the extra time and effort. The first hurdle you’ll encounter is her abundant lack of time. As a single parent (presumably working), she is always on the go. Doing the job of two parents means doing double-duty. In order to go on dates, you need to be prepared to book pretty far in advance. Not only that, but dates may be cancelled at the last minute due to flaky babysitters or sick kids. You will have to be patient and understanding, two things that can be very hard to remember by the third rain check.

One of the most important things to remember in dating a single parent is to let them run the show where their child is concerned. Rushing them along before they’re ready for the next step will not make your relationship progress faster. It’ll make it die harder.

Getting Accustomed To The Child

The child presents a multitude of new issues in himself. For one thing, he may have lingering issues about his father (whether he’s absent or in the child’s life still) and who the heck is this new guy? Another situation is that the child can feel jealous of his mother’s attention (once completely wrapped around his finger) now being somewhat focused on a stranger. This all depends on the child’s personality. He may love or hate you, want to be around you all the time, or want his mother all to himself.

Many single parents are extremely protective and may choose to not introduce you to the child until you are both serious about this relationship. This will help you to determine if both of you are ready to take the next step.

Dating Another Single Parent

When you are a single father, dating another single parent can be great – or it can be the Apocolypse. When you think about how hard it is to date a woman when there is a child involved, think of how much harder it would be with two or more children involved. All of a sudden, he’s worried about her kids liking him while she’s worried about his children. To make it even more complicated, the kids may not like the other kids. It certainly adds a very complex level, yet if you can make it work, it can be turned into a unique, but loving family unit.

Q&A: Relationship Trouble – Should I Stay Or Should I Go?

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Relationship problems can come in a variety of forms, and they differ greatly from relationship to relationship. Some relationship troubles can be worked out, but other, more serious issues can pave the way to a breakup. How do you know if your relationship problems can be fixed or if you just need to walk away?

Question: Hi Dan and Jenn. I need help with my relationship. I have a big problem with my boyfriend. We’ve been together over a year now and the problem we have is getting worse. I’ve told him how I feel and how much what he does hurts me and makes me feel insignificant, and when he says he’ll stop it, he does it again and again. The three main problems are:
1. He doesn’t talk or text for long periods of time because he’s too busy playing computer games.
2. He regularly shouts over top of me or interrupts me when I’m speaking, whether it’s a serious situation or not. I can be crying my eyes out talking to him and he will still do it.
3. Finally, he sometimes shouts at me, and not just raising his voice, he really shouts loudly, my parents worry about it and ask if I’m okay, and it honestly does frighten me sometimes.

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-mLcFPKR8Ec[/youtube]

He Won’t Change

If you’ve talked to your partner about the behavior that bothers you, especially if you’ve mentioned it more than once and communicated to him clearly how you feel, and he refuses to change, it’s time to consider the fact that he probably won’t ever change. You can’t force someone to change their behavior, you can only talk to them about how it affects you and hope that they see how much better the relationship can be if they change their ways. If he won’t change, the only thing you can do is change yourself. You can change how you react to his behavior, but stop and think before you do. Do you want to be ignoring his behavior forever?

Respect Yourself

An abusive relationship isn’t always one where one partner physically hits another. A lot of abuse is verbal and emotional. If you stay in an abusive relationship – no matter what kind of abuse you’re living with – you’re doing yourself a disservice and disrespecting yourself. Many times, if your partner can’t or won’t change his ways, you’ve got to take a stand for yourself. If he won’t respect you, you have to respect you – or who will? Don’t rely on other people to treat you with respect. Treat yourself with respect and don’t stand for any kind of abuse, be it physical, sexual or verbal and emotional.

You Deserve A Happy Relationship

No matter what you think or what your partner may tell you, you absolutely deserve a relationship that makes you happy. If you aren’t happy with who you’re with now, it’s time to find someone you are happy with. Life is too short and your time is too precious to spend it being unhappy with someone who refuses to respect you and be respectful to you. While no man can “make” you happy, you don’t have to be miserable with someone who treats you poorly. If your current relationship isn’t giving you what you want, it’s time to walk away. Take some time and think about what you do want in a relationship and start looking for that.

Q&A: Does Masturbation Reduce Penis Sensitivity?

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As you get older, your body changes and mature in a variety of ways which sometimes can be a surprise. As you age, your sexual organs and libido change as well, and you might find yourself wanting more or less sex or finding that masturbation feels different than when you were younger. Other factors change genital sensitivity as well, such as medication or frequency of masturbation.

Question: Dear Dan and Jenn, I’ve been masturbating since I was 9 and since I turned 18, the the sensitivity of my penis started to change and now its takes me longer to reach orgasm. I wanted to know does masturbation reduce the sensitivity of the penis or is that the intensity of orgasm changes overtime as you get older?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBBp-GsE0Ic[/youtube]

Hormonal Changes

When you hit puberty, your hormones go into overdrive and you may find that your penis is extremely sensitive and can be aroused by even the smallest trigger. As you age, your body stops producing so many hormones and you’ll find that your penis isn’t as sensitive as it was when you were going through puberty. Although this sounds like it’s a bad thing (after all, who doesn’t want a sensitive penis) it’s actually a good thing. Did you really want to be getting erections at the wrong time throughout your life, or even suffering from premature ejaculation? The reduction of penis sensitivity as you get older is preparing you for a healthy and happy sex life in the future.

Frequency Of Masturbation

How often you masturbate plays a big part in how sensitive your penis is. If you masturbate only once a week or even less, you’ll find that your penis is more sensitive to other triggers. However, if you masturbate daily or even a few times a day, your penis isn’t going to respond to every little thing that touches it. This can actually be used to your advantage. If you want a more sensitive penis, masturbate less. Frequent masturbation helps prevent getting erections at the wrong time, and can be used before a first date or other event.

Other Factors That Change Penis Sensitivity

Other things that can change your penis sensitivity and sexual desire are prescription medications, illegal drugs and alcohol. These things can change your penis sensitivity very drastically, even to the point of making it difficult to get an erection or causing you to lose your erection when masturbating. It is not at all uncommon for prescription medications to change genital sensitivity and libido a great deal and if you suspect that your medications are to blame for a less sensitive penis or a reduced sex drive, talk to your doctor about it and find out if you can make a medication switch. Penis sensitivity can also change between intercourse and masturbation, or how long it’s been since you’ve had sex or masturbated. If you find that your penis is becoming drastically less sensitive and it is causing you to have problems in your sex life or with your partner, visit your doctor to rule out any medical causes.

How Does Your Parents’ Relationship Affect Your Own?

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Every family has its quirks and faults, its cultures and traditions. Every relationship has its neuroses and its deep-seeded, psychological behaviors, which are many times related to those families. It is no secret that how your parents treated one another can trickle down to you, providing you with the motivations or ideals to bring to your own relationships.

Affection

Were your parents loving and affectionate toward one another? Were they open about hugging and kissing? The easiest way to create an affectionate child is, well, to show affection. That child will then grow up to treat their partner with the same loving gestures that they witnessed in their own folks.

Sex

Eek! I know, no one wants to think of their parents having sex. However, if you were raised in a home in which your parents were not embarrassed about sex, didn’t mind answering questions or talking about sex, you will likely carry that same tendency throughout all your relationships. This can make you a more attentive partner, more open-minded, and more accepting of the sexual world around you.

Argument Styles

How did your parents handle fights? Did they calmly discuss the matter in the bedroom, away from prying ears? Or did they yell and scream and throw things? Having grown up in such an atmosphere, you are more likely to handle fights like this, as well. If you start to feel like you’re losing control, leave the situation immediately. Sticking around will only escalate the argument, possibly to violence.

Multiple Marriages

It wasn’t long ago that second, third, and fourth (and so on) marriages were against the norm and looked down upon. In today’s society, though, it is becoming much more prevalent and acceptable. While in the past, studies have shown that people who were married multiple times were more likely to divorce again. It seems the way this affects the children is that they may be less likely to endure or struggle to improve a bad relationship.

Cheating

While much of how the parent handles the relationship seems to directly “inspire” the child’s, it is not always the case. While talking with a group of women about their parents’ relationships, a great many of them mentioned that one or both parents cheated on the other. Rather than this behavior passing down to their own relationships, the women instead took on a very firm stance against cheating. This seems to be one trait which so negatively impacts the child, that it is ingrained in them to despise all forms of cheating.

The Final Word

Regardless of how your parents carried out their relationships, you don’t have to do the same with yours. While the inclination to act a certain way may be strong within you, it is not mandated. By being conscious of your decisions to act a certain way or your ideals for what a relationship should be like, you can rise above (or emulate, if you desire) the relationship model which you have always known.