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Q&A: 5 Ways To Make Condoms More Sexy

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While condoms are the best way to have safer sex, sometimes using a condom can seem to “kill the mood” or take away from you or your partner’s arousal. Does that mean you shouldn’t use a condom? Heck no! Here are some excellent ways to take putting on a condom and being safe from “blah” to sexy!

Question: I have a question, sometimes when I use a condom I lose my erection because I don’t get much stimulation and it’s a bit of a mood killer stopping and putting it on. Any advice?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oIzl1u-AoOM[/youtube]

Lube It Up

Putting a dab or two of lube on the inside of a condom before he puts it on can make a world of difference in how intercourse feels for him with a condom on. Better yet, get your man turned on by using lube to give him a great hand job before putting the condom on to get him revved up beyond the point of no return. Just remember to wash your hands with soap and warm water after the condom is on so you don’t accidentally get sperm or semen where you don’t want it.

Use Flavored Lubes

Condoms come in a variety of scents and flavors, which can make using a condom much more fun. Flavored condoms are absolutely essential for super safe oral sex, because giving your man a blow job with a regular condom on is just plain “yuck!” Try lots of different flavors to find the ones you and your partner like best, and don’t forget – flavored condoms also smell great too! Even if you’re not planning on oral sex, flavored condoms can still add that little extra sexy something.

Use Your Mouth

The biggest complaint about condoms is that stopping what you’re doing to put it on destroys the mood. Why not make putting on the condom a part of foreplay instead? Use your mouth to put on your partner’s condom, slowly unrolling it as your mouth moves down his penis. Use your lips instead of your teeth and before you know it, you and your partner will be having safer sex without a hitch!

Experiment With Different Condoms

In addition to the various fun flavors that condoms come in, there are also a variety of textures, thicknesses and brands for you to try too! Try ribbed or studded condoms, or ultra thin “skin like” condoms. Warming lubes are also great for her pleasure! Many online retailers that offer sex toys also offer condoms, and you can buy “sampler packs” at an incredible discount so you can try them all.

Put It On During Foreplay

Instead of waiting until you’re ready to have intercourse, try putting on a condom before foreplay. If it fits right, it’s not going to come off because the tapered base of the condom will hold it on nice and snug. By the time you get to the sex part, you might have even forgotten you have one on at all!

It’s A Safe Way To Get Some

One of the sexiest things about condoms is putting one on means you don’t have to freak out about STD’s and pregnancy36 while you’re getting some. You can relax and have fun instead!

Whoa, Nelly! Are You Moving Too Fast?

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There comes a time in every relationship when you want to learn all about the person you are dating. You want to hear stories from his childhood. You want to spend the whole weekend together in bed. You want to discuss names of your future babies.

Whoa, what? The future? Babies? Slow down there, missy! It’s natural for expectations to be high in the beginning of a new relationship. Before tension enters the picture, you can imagine all manners of a life together. You can easily see yourselves growing old together. But just as important as it is to want the relationship to sustain, it is equally so that you hold back before you send the man running into the night, wearing nothing but his unmentionables and a horrified expression.

How Do You Know If You’re Rushing The Relationship?

You are pushing to meet his family.

Getting to know the family is a very private affair, reserved only for the best of the best. He will not want to bring home every girl he dates for a month or two. He wants to wait to see if this will last before subjecting her to scrutiny from his mother. Let him call the shots on this one. He’ll know when the time is right.

You call and/or text much more than him.

You wake up and text, “Good morning.” He replies, asks how you’re doing. You follow up with three texts about a dream you had. He sends a curt “That’s nice.” At lunchtime, you call to see what he’s up to, to ask what he’s going to eat, to tell him you’re thinking of him. Then you call on your drive home to talk to him again. When he doesn’t answer, you send a text, asking where he is. That night, you send four more texts…and so on. Unless you are receiving a near equal amount of replies or he makes the effort to call you as much as you are calling him, your constant attention is probably smothering him.

You talk about the (distant) future.

Rather than planning the weekend, you are starting to plan your future in your mind. It’s good to feel optimistic that there could be a future for you two lovebirds…but don’t start wedding-dress shopping just yet. The quickest way to scare a man off is to have the “Where do you see this going?” talk too soon. Wait until you have more time together under your belt.

You want to see him every day.

Much like calling or texting too much, trying to see him every day will get old quickly. Not only could he (and you!) start to get burned out on all the couple-time, but he will think you are the possessive type by keeping him from seeing his friends. You each had a life before the other came along. Keep living that life. As you start to progress (naturally, without one person rushing it forward), you will start to develop a life that involves the two of you more. Enjoy this last bout of freedom, because if all goes well, it won’t last forever.

How to Get or Find a Girlfriend

Q&A: I Feel No Relief When Masturbating – Am I Doing It Wrong?

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Masturbation for women is a little different and much more involved than it is for a guy. Women, however, require a bit more mental, emotional and physical stimulation to reach orgasm, especially if they’re newer to masturbation. Here’s what you can do if masturbation isn’t satisfying your sexual needs.

Question: Hey Jenn, I’m going to ask you, since you’re a girl. When I do “that” by myself, a lot of times it’s not that great and leaves me still horny as hell! Am I doing something wrong?

–Facebook Fan

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=evOIljymcFw[/youtube]

Relaxing Before Masturbation

Women can’t have an orgasm when they’re stressed or thinking about work or the kids. This is one of the biggest problems that women have with masturbation. It’s so difficult to calm their mind down and get it off the “to do” list and in the mood that they either don’t masturbate at all or have trouble doing it and reaching orgasm. If you want to have a great masturbation session and feel satisfied afterwards, it’s essential that you relax before masturbating. Draw a bath, have a glass of wine if you’re of age, or do something else that you find relaxing and refreshing. Read a steamy romance novel or even an erotic novel to get your mind off of everyday stresses and start thinking about pleasure.

Start With Your Clitoris

If you’re new to masturbation, the easiest way to masturbate is to head straight for your clitoris. You don’t have to insert a dildo or other toy into your vagina to acheive orgasm. Once you get the hang of things, you may want to add g-spot stimulation to your masturbation but until then, you’ll have the most success by simply focusing on your clitoris. Use lots of lube to prevent discomfort, and use a vibrator if you like. Just explore the area until you find out what feels good – and then keep doing it. Don’t focus on going harder or faster, unless that’s what you like. If you want, go slow. Just remember to stay relaxed and keep your mind from wandering off into stressful territory. Another issue that women have when masturbating is not allowing themselves enough time to explore themselves. Instead, they focus on having a “quickie” instead of relaxing and letting the pleasure take over. Many times when women are so focused on the end result, they can’t get there at all.

Let Go When The Orgasm Comes

A lot of women have trouble letting go when orgasm approaches. When you’re about to have an orgasm, your muscles will tighten up and your breath will catch in your throat. Sometimes at this stage, women simply freak out, tense up and stop breathing and as a result, their bodies start to come down from the brink of orgasm instead of jump off the edge. When your body reaches the point of orgasm, it’s important to remember to breathe deeply and relax your muscles. Don’t focus so much on the orgasm itself, relax and just focus on the pleasure. Continue to do what feels good and the orgasm will come – no pun intended. You might even get multiple orgasms!

Is It a Relationship Rut Or About Time You Give Up?

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All relationships ebb and flow, regardless of their longevity or level of commitment. The relationships change over time because the people within those relationships are changing. Sometimes those ebbs can be particularly treacherous, though, threatening to dissolve years of a couple’s hard work. When unhappiness rears itself—whether it is because of loneliness, external stress, or one of the million reasons a couple drifts apart—it can be very difficult to decide whether the relationship is temporarily out of service…or bound for the junk yard.

Digging Deeper

The first thing to figure out is what are you unhappy about? This is very important for one reason: is it directly related to your spouse? If it is work stress or a sudden death in the family, chances are it has nothing to do with your relationship. Rather, your spouse has become a scapegoat for your frustrations. However, if it is because of something your partner is doing (or not doing), that may be different. Is it your partner’s decreased sex drive? Is he or she not showing enough affection anymore?

Next, how long has this been happening? Are you on Day Three or Year Three of feeling like your marriage is doomed? While there is no definitive length of time within which you can consider your relationship to be in a rut, you may want to give it at least a couple months. Within that time, circumstances can drastically change, behaviors can adapt, and a looming problem can be resolved. However, this does not mean you should stick your head in the sand during this time. By all means, work on these problems as they crop up…but don’t consider your relationship null and void after a bad couple of weeks.

Can You Work It Out?

Third, is there a light at the end of the tunnel? Is there anything present which gives you hope for the future? Maybe it is an unexpected, passionate kiss in the kitchen while cooking dinner. Maybe it is the admission that he or she was thinking about you all day. While these gestures are small, they can give just enough hope to the desperate partner to keep trying.

Next, is your partner willing to work on these issues, as well? You can read all the self-help books in the world, apply the techniques created by experts, plan extravagant dates to sweep your spouse off his or her feet; but if that person is not reciprocating or even trying, your efforts are in vain. It takes two people keep a relationship going. While the amount of effort may change over time, there must be at least a little exertion coming from each spouse.

Saying Goodbye

Finally, think about your life without this person. Would you be happier without this person in your life? This is the most telling sign of whether your bad relationship has reached its expiration date. Even in the gloomiest lulls or the most volatile arguments, a person can still think objectively: “My partner may frustrate the bejeezus out of me, but I still want him/her in my life.” If you think of a life without your spouse and all you feel is relief or hope, however, it is time to call it quits.

Q&A: Can Ejaculation Cause Blindness?

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Many stories have been told about sex, masturbation and ejaculation to try to scare people into not having sex or not masturbating. Several years ago, masturbation was believed to be wrong for a man (and enjoying sexual pleasure was believed to be wrong for women) and that ejaculation would cause blindness. Can it?

Question: Can ejaculation cause blindness? This is something that I heard from various sources (people I know and people I talked to on the Internet) but I don’t know if there has actually been proven cases about this. Is it true or is this something that people made up?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o30J-qFYrTQ[/youtube]

Ejaculation Does Not Cause Blindness

Ejaculation – during sex or masturbation – never has and never will cause a man to go blind. This is what is known as a sex myth, and there are many of them. Other sex myths about masturbation and ejaculation are that it will cause a man to grow hairy palms. Going blind or growing hair on your palms is not something that will happen from simply ejaculating during sex or masturbation. There are no special or “rare” cases of this happening – it won’t happen, ever. It never did. If these sex myths were true, just about every guy in the world would be blind or have hair on his palms.

Where These Myths Come From

Generally, sex myths like this come from the last hundred years or so, when many religious and philisophical organizations decided it was bad or morally wrong to masturbate and shouldn’t be done. Rumors were spread that bad things would happen if you masturbated or ejaculated, such as going blind or growing hair on your palms. People who went blind were often looked down upon, almost as though they were proof that this affliction existed. Young boys and men were afraid to masturbate or ejaculate, because they were afraid horrible things would happen to them. Rumors and sex myths such as these were a form of control, a way for religious and philisophical organizations to force people to do what they believed was right.

What To Do When Someone Tells You A Sex Myth

If someone you know, or someone on the Internet tells you something you know is false, just dismiss it. Although the vast majority of civilization has realized that masturbation and ejaculation won’t in fact cause blindness or hair to grow on the palms, some people are still suggesting this is true to try to continue to force people to adhere to their own belief system. There is absolutely nothing wrong with masturbation and ejaculation – in fact, it’s a normal and healthy way to discover and enjoy your sexuality. A man’s body was designed to ejaculate, as a form of sexual release and to help make babies. Sometimes, if a man does not ejaculate after sexual tension has built up, this can cause some discomfort or pain. Masturbation is an excellent way to relieve sexual tension without the consequences that sex can bring, such as sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy.