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Dating Tips: How to Be Memorable Without Being Creepy

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When playing the dating game, it’s hard to do everything just right so you score a phone number or a date the next night. Too often, many men find themselves ending up being the guy that creeped her out instead of being the guy she remembers, who made her laugh and smile.

Here’s how to avoid being the “creepy guy” and instead, how to be the memorable guy she gives her number to or calls you the next day if you gave her your number.

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Dating Tip #1 – She’ll Remember How You Made Her Feel

When you meet a girl, she usually won’t remember what you looked like or what you said. She won’t remember what the two of you talked about and she won’t remember what songs were playing or even what drinks you ordered her. What she will remember, however, is how you made her feel when you were flirting with her. Did you make her feel good about herself? Did you make her feel like she was the only girl in the room and that you had eyes only for her? Of course, if you overwhelm her with unwanted attention, she’ll remember that too, but then you’ll be the creepy guy. Make her feel fabulous about herself and she’ll definitely remember you.

Dating Tip #2 – Truly Listen To What She’s Saying

All women want to be heard and want someone to listen to what they have to say. To get her to remember you, you have to be that person. When talking with a woman and listening to her, don’t just nod your head and say, “uh huh…uh huh.” She’ll catch on to that real quick and probably kick you to the curb. Instead, actively listen to her by being engaged in the conversation and not allowing any moments of awkward silence. Avoid talking about sports (since very few women enjoy talking about sports at all) and avoid talking about your job or hers. She probably doesn’t care about what happened to you at work today, and she most likely doesn’t want to talk shop when she’s not working. Talk about travel, “what-would-you-do-if” scenarios or favorite foods or hobbies. Make eye contact, but don’t stare.

Dating Tip #3 – Leave On A Good Note

Many men make the fatal dating mistake of waiting until the conversation has run out of steam before making their exit. Even if the conversation was going great at first and you and her were hitting it off really well, if you wait until you hit the conversation dead zone to leave and try to get her number, she’s not going to remember the beginning of the conversation. What she will remember is the awkward silence and then the request for her number – and she probably won’t give it out at that point. By making sure you leave the conversation on a good note, you’ll make her curious for more. Have an out pre-planned, such as getting home to walk the dog, etc. so you can have a good reason to leave before things get awkward.

Dating Tip #4 – Make Her Smile And Laugh

The best flirting move ever is to simply make her smile. Making her smile and laugh is the best thing you can do to make sure she remembers you when she goes home that night. Don’t tell lame jokes – instead, point out the humor that is present in every day life. Tell her something funny that happened to you the other day, or the hilarious thing your roommate did last night. Make sure your funny stories aren’t vulgar or involve painting you – or any other guy really – in a bad light. Seriously, this is not the time for frat boy jokes about how you got so drunk that your friends drew a penis on your face with a Sharpie. Make sure that when you’re flirting with her and telling funny stories to get her to laugh and smile that you’re also allowing her a chance to tell you funny stories that would make you laugh or smile as well.

Dating Tip #5 – Be Yourself

Above all, when you’re dating, it’s so important to be yourself and allow your true self to come through. Some people don’t have chemistry with each other and that’s okay. If you’re not clicking with her, make your exit and move on to someone else, allowing her to do the same. Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not to get her attention, get her number or to get her to remember you. If you’re not being yourself and she remembers you the next day or when you call her, it’s not really you she’s remembering is it? It’s a facade. Just be yourself!

Dating Tips: You Got Her Number – Now What?

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Scoring a girl’s phone number when dating can seem like a huge success – and it is. But the question is, what do you do after you get her number? The thought can definitely be nerve wracking because this is where you can really make or break the relationship. When you call her and what you say to her can make her blow you off completely or become super interested in you. So here’s the downlow on what to do after you get her number so you can get a second date – and maybe even more!

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What Are You Trying To Achieve With Her?

So you’ve chatted a super cute girl up at the bar and you’ve gotten her number – score! But now you’re just not quite sure what to do with it. You’re staring at it like it’s an alien that will take over your body if you touch it the wrong way and you can’t help but look at it every five seconds for fear that it will scamper off the counter and be lost forever. Many guys are so freaked out by what to say when they call a girl for the first time after getting her phone number that they don’t end up calling her at all – or they call so many days or weeks later that she barely remembers who he was. Before you call a girl, think about what you’re trying to achieve with her. Are you looking to date her and form a solid, long term relationship? Or are you looking for more of a casual friendship or a hook up? Thinking about what you really want first can help you set the stage for what to say next.

There’s Not A Right Time, But There Is A Wrong Time

The “right time” to call a girl after you score her phone number is pretty much whenever you feel the desire to talk to her or ask her out on a date. So really, there is no “right time.” The idea of waiting a certain number of days before you call her so you don’t seem desperate is an outdated myth that will only serve to make her think you’re not interested in her at all. So don’t worry about the “right” time to call her – instead, worry about the “wrong” time to make your move. Waiting too long to call her after you’ve gotten her number may make her think you’re not interested in her, or worse, she may have forgotten who you were by the time you get around to dialing her number. She won’t remember why she gave you her number and she’ll be more reluctant to set up a date with you if she does at all.

Keep It Simple

When calling a girl you just met, it’s definitely important to keep the conversation simple. Be honest, and let her know you really enjoyed talking with her when you met. Elaborating on how awesome, wonderful, sexy and hot she is will just make you seem creepy and stalker-ish. So keep the conversation short and simply let her know that you had a great time and you’d love to do it again. Be prepared with a date idea, but make sure it’s something casual like going out for a cup of coffee or grabbing a quick lunch together. This is especially true if you had a difficult time getting her number to begin with – suggesting a long, romantic dinner at the fancy restaurant downtown really isn’t going to get you anywhere here.

Texting Can Be Your Best Friend

In the age of technology, it’s important not to overlook texting as a mode of communication. Texts are wonderful ways to connect with a woman after getting her number and it won’t put either you or her on the spot. After meeting her and scoring her phone number, send her a short and sweet text the next day letting her know you enjoyed her company – and leave it at that. Chances are, she’ll text you back and let you know that she had fun too. You can also suggest going out on a date in a text, but again, make sure it’s a simple, short date like coffee or lunch. Don’t blow up her phone with tons of texts though – if you do, you’ll seem just as creepy and weird as if you called her a hundred times. Give her time to think about it and answer your text. Remember that she did give you her number and that means she liked you enough to do so. Play it cool and you’ll definitely score the opportunity to get to know her and let her get to know you.

Top 5 Dating Mistakes That Women Make With Men

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Great men are hard to find and even harder to keep. So when you find one, don’t ruin your chances of turning it into a great relationship by making these deadly dating mistakes. Remember, attractive men have dated a lot of women, so they know what’s going on. The result? They’ll disappear before you realize you’ve done anything wrong. Here’s how to avoid the top five dating mistakes that women make with men so you can increase your chances of keeping a keeper.

Mistake #1: Sharing Your Feelings With Him Too Early

Men love their freedom and independence ­- no mysteries there! So when you announce that you love him, it often sets off a trigger that you might be one of those “clingy types.” This will no doubt send him running out the door as quick as he can manage. Play it safe and remember that the early stages of dating should always remain casual.

Only after you get to know each other really well should you pursue anything further. It’s also worth mentioning that you can’t logically convince someone to fall in love with you. Falling in love is a process that happens outside the conscious mind ­and there’s nothing you can do to make it happen, speed it up or make it stop. It will happen when it happens. It may happen for you well before it happens for him or vice versa. It is wise to keep your feelings to yourself until you’ve been dating them for quite some time or they’ve decided to say it first.

Mistake #2: Trying To Push It Too Far Too Soon

It’s natural to wonder about the nature of your relationship. “Does he want more? Or is this just a fling?” But remember, if you start talking about marriage after only 12 months, you could ruin your chances to take things further. And if you don’t live together, cooking dinner or doing his laundry isn’t a good idea.

A nice meal once in a while is okay, but don’t make it a regular thing. Yes, it’s true, many men are scared of commitment; but just because they don’t want it now, doesn’t mean they don’t want to settle down. They just need time. Let your man take the lead when it comes to announcing the state of the relationship or addressing the marriage, moving in or long term relationship issues. If you surprise him with something he’s not ready for, it will definitely freak him out and these things can’t be taken back once you’ve let them out in the open.

Mistake #3: Being Too Available

You might think this is playing a mind game or being manipulative, but putting your best side forward is also manipulative. Why? Because it’s done to get a desirable outcome. This is simply a reminder to be who you were before you met the man and continue to be that person, rather than use trickery.

Remember that your busy, interesting and fun life only has so much time for him, no matter how much you like him. And remember, men love a challenge, so this actually works in your favor. Don’t put aside everything you did before you met him to make room for him in your life. Instead, continue on about your business just as it was before you met him. He can wait a day or two for a dinner date if you have other things to do and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Mistake #4: Not Being Yourself

Men love confident women with a strong sense of self-worth. Unfortunately, women often try to guess how the man wants them to act and try to accommodate his mold, which leaves very little room for your own personality to shine. (And yes, men do this too.) Instead of trying to be what you think he wants you to be, simply be yourself and let him fall in love with you just the way you are.

Mistake #5: Putting Too Much Stock In Outward Appearances

Believe it or not, it’s NOT make-up, dyed hair, pretty clothes or even nice shoes that attract men, not into a successful long-term relationships anyway! While “looks” is the obvious factor that seems to get an instant response from men, long-term success comes with finding a man who admires and respects you regardless of your exterior. If your man only likes you for your looks, then he doesn’t really love you. Look your best, but don’t go out of your way. Don’t do anything you wouldn’t normally do to make yourself look good. Remember, you want him to fall in love with you.

Cell Phone Etiquette

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Long gone are the days of sitting beside your home phone waiting anxiously for your recent date to call you. The advent of the cell phone has done much to alter the way we communicate with those around us, including our romantic partners. Where do cell phone calls and texting fit into the dating landscape? How can you take maximum advantage of them in your relationship while still following proper dating etiquette?

Can You Answer Your Cell Phone On A Date?

First and foremost, let’s touch on a topic of frequent interest and dispute—when, if ever, is it appropriate to answer your cell phone on a date? With few exceptions (you’re a doctor or have some other on-call job, you’re expecting important news about a family member’s precarious health situation, etc.), you should put your phone on silent and forget about it. Nothing says “I’m bored with you,” faster than answering your cell or responding to a text in the middle of a dinner date. That’s a surefire way to convince your date that you feel they’re not worth your time. You’re not just hurting your date’s feelings, either—you are also distracting yourself from your own enjoyment of your time together. If you must check your phone, you can always wait until your date goes to use the restroom.

Can You Text Instead Of Call?

Another popular topic of contention is texting. In what situations is texting as appropriate as calling your significant other? A good rule of thumb is to consider texting someone to be a more casual form of communication than calling someone. If you just want to send your sweetie a sentence to let them know you’re thinking of them, or if you’re simply asking them to pick up some pizza for dinner, or sexting them something you want to do later, a text is totally acceptable. Not so if you’re asking them out on a date (especially if it’s the first or second date!), arguing, or apologizing for some sort of wrong-doing. Taking the time to call your boyfriend or girlfriend in these situations shows that you truly care. Additionally, remember that there is no good way to indicate sarcasm or sincerity in a text, so calling someone can save you from some serious (and possibly anger-inducing) confusion.

How Not To Use Your Cell Phone When Dating

There are still more hazards of cell phone use when it comes to relationships. Drunk-dialing is a terrible idea and a really good way to say something you’ll regret. Breaking up with someone over the phone is cowardly, but doing it via text message is even worse. Call things off in person and rest assured that your reputation won’t take a hit after the fact. No one wants to date the girl or guy who becomes notorious for dumping their exes in text form. Yet cell phones also have their benefits. If you’re in a serious relationship and go out of town on business, a quick check-in call or text each night can be a great way to show you care. Plus, you can use these rules to stand out in a sea of ill-mannered singles that don’t know how to behave better. Good cell phone etiquette, not unlike good manners in general, can give you an extra leg up in the dating scene. Just remember, when you use what you’ve learned here to find the person worth saying it to, that first “I love you” should be spoken in person. That means not on the phone, and certainly not in a text!

Dishing The Dating Dirt

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Okay, so you’ve been working on getting yourself ready for your next great relationship. You’ve dealt with the demons in your past and laid them to rest, you’ve built up a strong relationship with yourself, and now all you need is someone to share your life with! Suddenly, you start feeling doubtful and vulnerable at the thought of putting yourself out there again, making yourself available for heartache and pain. But it doesn’t have to be like that, and that’s why I want to tell you about part of my tried-and-tested inner-view process. If you can learn how to navigate the sea of 1.45 million potential mates out there for you, you have a much greater chance of finding someone who might be a good match!

Key Rules For Successful Dating

Here’s something to think about: why are you single right now? It sounds like a silly question, but understanding why you want to start the process of moving toward a healthy relationship is just as important as knowing how to do it. This is certainly where we often go wrong when we meet someone we think we like.

So, the game plan, if you’re ready to get started:

  1. Relax. This is supposed to be enjoyable, and it is!
  2. Non-negotiables are called that for a reason – don’t compromise on the things you really want.
  3. Don’t forget who you are and what you want, instead of spending your effort being what other people want.
  4. You may think that The Real You is not as attractive as Seductive You, but do you want someone to get to know your seduction routine, or who you really are?

Inner-Viewing For Success

You don’t have time to get to know 1.45 million people, so how do you weed out some serious candidates? Intuition is the best way to figure out who deserves a little more of your time and who doesn’t. With 97% of our incoming information being processed pre-cognitively, you can learn pretty much everything you need to know from your gut feelings.

Remember these things about GREAT relationships:

  • Love is not external. You create and generate it inside yourself, and there is an endless supply. It is not something people can give or take away from you.
  • Intimacy is not a tool used on the first date to try to get a second date. It grows over time as two people learn to trust each other.
  • There is only one chance to have a first kiss with someone, and the anticipation can be just as wonderful. So don’t rush to get it out of the way. If someone is interested in a real relationship, they will wait with you until the time is right.

Questions To Ask A Potential Mate Before The Date

Here are some essential questions to ask before you give out your contact information and make the first date:

  1. What is this person connected to? Okay, you just met, but you should be able to build at least some context around a person, even if you’ve just started getting to know them. Where did they go to college? Do they live nearby? Do you have any mutual friends? At the risk of sounding dramatic, getting basic information about a person and checking them out can be a life-or-death thing. Don’t be afraid to use Google to help you learn more about someone. Get their full name and do a little investigating.
  2. Where do they live? Long distance relationships may sound romantic and very Hollywood, but in reality they’re extremely hard work, and usually end up either with someone relocating, or with a breakup. If you’re not up for that, then make sure this person lives in your local area before you start connecting with them.
  3. Are they single AND available? Just because someone is paying attention to you or flirting like mad doesn’t mean they’re not married. And just because someone is not married doesn’t mean they’re ready or wanting to be in a relationship! Find out right at the beginning if someone is just playing around with you.

Asking these questions may seem corny, but it’s not difficult, and it can cut out a lot of exasperation later. If you respect yourself enough not to waste time with all the wrong people, then the right people will start respecting you in return. It’s a great way to look after both your heart and your safety.