Introducing your partner to bondage – if that’s not something she’s already into – is tricky business. If you bring it up in the wrong way, or try the hardcore stuff first, you might just turn her off of bondage and BDSM for good. Here’s how to slowly introduce your partner to bondage so you have the best chance of allowing her to get into it!
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When To Bring It Up
Bringing up new things to try in the bedroom is not the best thing to do when you’re already in the bedroom. Never bring up new sex topics during sex, right before sex or right after sex. Also don’t bring it up during a fight or when you and your partner are tired and stressed out. So if you want your girl to get into bondage, when do you bring it up? Try talking to your girlfriend about light bondage during dinner, or after you both have had a couple glasses of wine. Bring the topic of BDSM or bondage up when you and your partner are both relaxed, stress free and are open to new ideas.
How To Bring It Up
If you have a fairly open and honest relationship with your partner, putting it out there as something you’d like to try may work well for you. However, if you’re not sure how your partner will react to your interest in bondage, you may want to be a little more creative on how you introduce the topic to her. Try telling her you read an article about bondage, or you have a friend that tried it with his girl and gauge her reaction to the information. If she seems interested, it’s probably okay to move forward with the conversation. If your girlfriend seems nervous, upset or even disgusted with the idea of BDSM or bondage, you can take that as your cue to zip it. Don’t get too hung up on your partner not wanting to try bondage, because there are lots of other fun ways you and your partner can connect in the bedroom!
What You Need
Assuming you and your partner have both agreed to try bondage, it’s best to start with light bondage rather than going straight for the hardcore handcuffs. There are a variety of products available online and at your nearest adult toy store that make bondage much more fun for both you and your partner. You don’t have to spend a lot of money on adult toys to start out with, but definitely get a few things such as a beginner’s fetish kit or japanese bondage rope. Don’t try to use regular rope you bought from the store – talk about ouch! You’ll have more success with getting your girlfriend to actually enjoy being tied up and tying you up if you have a few things that were actually made for what you want to do. If you and your partner really like the lighter stuff, you can consider graduating to some more hardcore bondage and BDSM. Remember to always have a safe word, and always stop whatever you’re doing immediately if your partner uses the safeword.