Lube is essential for sex to be really great – no matter what you might have heard before. Here’s what to get and why.
Why Lube?
Sexual lubricants add a lot to the lovemaking process. Depending on their function, timing, and use, they can help a woman achieve orgasm faster, make sex feel better, and alleviate uncomfortable aftereffects (like chafing or burning). Sure, your own spit works just fine it’s free, always available, and works. But it only works for a short time, and sometimes you want a lubricant that will last a bit longer, taste somewhat different, or serve another function that will heighten the sexual pleasure for both of you.
Factors That Decrease Lubrication
There are some factors that will add or decrease from a woman’s natural lubricant, such as:
- Age: Plays an important part of the lubrication process. As a woman gets older, she stops producing as much natural lubrication because of hormonal fluctuations.
- Having Kids: It’s common for a woman to have extra moisture when she’s pregnant, and less when she’s breastfeeding. Blame it on the hormones again.
- Drugs: A large number of drugs (both prescribed and otherwise) play with a woman’s wetness. Any medication that warns of dry mouth, antidepressants, cold medicines and alcohol all contribute to lower lubrication.
- Stress and Travel: Stress reduces anyone’s sexy feelings, but travel could go either way. Some folks use traveling as a way to relax and enjoy some space away from home, but those who travel for work, for instance, may see it as a chore or necessity. Some women who fly a lot have even coined a term called ‘lube lag’, where they find their natural lubrication severely reduced because of their lengthy travel times.
- Condoms and Dental Dams: Even though lubricated themselves, condoms have a tendency to dry a woman out, so make sure to have extra lubricant on hand when playing with either.
- Menstrual Cycle: It goes without saying that during a woman’s cycle, the amount of lubrication available to her is going to differ. However, you’ll notice that, for some women, the middle of the month (around ovulation) is when she’ll be the wettest, only secondary to when she’s actually menstruating.
- Extended Sex Sessions: If you’ve ever had a marathon oral sex session, you’ll be nodding your head as you read this. Not only will you feel raw and dry after about 30 minutes of stimulation, but she’ll be walking a bit funny the next day because of the lack of wetness.
Different Types Of Lube
There are different types of lube to look out for when going shopping. Look for these:
- Water Based: Most lubricants on the market today are water based, such as the infamous KY Jelly. This type of lubricant is most people’s favorite because it doesn’t stain and can be used anywhere on the body even ingested in small amounts so there’s little worry when going down on a woman. Having said that, even the best water-based lubricants dry out with extended use, and some folks have developed allergies to them.
- Oil Based: Oil based lubes are fantastic for anal play, because they last forever and warm to the touch. They are also lovely for body massage. The only caveats with oil-based lubricants is that they make things so slippery that condoms and dental dams can slide right off, as well as if you’re using latex based products, the oil in the lube will break the latex down.
- Petroleum Based: These lubes, such as Vaseline or baby oil, are also great for anal play, but they will degrade condoms or dental dams and can potentially cause infections in a woman’s vagina so most people avoid these lubricants.
- Silicone Based: It isn’t as easy to find silicone lubricants as the others, although most sex shops do carry them. They have a silky, soft feel to them and last longer than all of the other types other than oil-based. They are safe to use on all parts of the body and will not stain. However, make sure to test silicone lubricants before using them internally, as more than a few people have allergies.
Whichever lubricants you decide on with your partner, just remember to not squirt it directly on your partner. Instead, put the lubricant in your hands, rub them together a bit, and warm it before putting it wherever it is you’d like to get slippery.