Love & Sex Answers

Today's #1 Love & Sex Resource

You are here: Home / Archives for anal sex

Let Her Touch Your Most Sensitive Spot – And Win Her For Good

By

The prostate is one of the most sensitive parts on a man. By letting your girl finger your prostate, she’ll blow your mind – and want to do it over and over!

How Adventurous Are You?

Most men would say “Adventure is my middle name” and “absolutely” with utmost confidence when it comes to sexual intercourse and experimenting with sex positions thanks to PORN and the Kama Sutra.

Women would and answer “it depends on my mood” to both questions. Get the hint? No? Are you retarded or something? Oh man! She needs motivation you dork!

Satisfying a woman entails a lot of time spent on initiating foreplay until her batteries are all charged up and her libido spiking up to the maximum level. I don’t mean just mediocre foreplay and hard slapping and pounding sexual intercourse after dude! It has to give her a very electrifying, explosive, intense and invigorating and masterfully orgasmic experience prior to getting your Jerky, Johnson, Willy, Junior or whatever you call your penis spit-fully satisfied inside her sweet, wet, warm vagina.

Men treat foreplay as just a waste of time and are oh so eager to just get it on. What most men don’t understand is that women who get enough foreplay can go the distance of attempting what only a handful of women would do for their man – and that is, to stimulate the male G-spot.

What Is The Male G-Spot?

“Eeewww!”, “You want me to do what???,”Yuck!”, ”That’s so disgusting! Are you gay?” – Typical reaction of women, who are deprived of enough foreplay, asked or, since we’re talking about sensitive and emotional women, I should say “requested” to stimulate the male G-spot.

For those of you who are clueless about what the hell I’m talking about, brace yourselves – get a cup of coffee, a cigarette, a bottle of beer or anything that could keep you glued to reading what I intend to reveal to the less fortunate ones.

Alright, the male G-spot is the prostate gland and not the head of your penis or your balls. It is located and can be stimulated from the anus. Yup! Don’t blame or question God for engineering it that way. There is a reason for its anatomical position. It is there because it is situated close to the so-called ejaculatory ducts. The term ejaculatory ducts are quite self-explanatory isn’t it? Get the logic?

Getting Her To Do It

This may be such a turn-off but if you give women the pampering and satisfaction she yearns and needs during foreplay, she will go the distance of allowing you to lay on your back with your legs spread apart like when a woman is about to give birth and best achieved when a pillow us under your hips aiding elevation and giving the appropriate angle. Applying pressure on the perineum or the surface of your anus would prep you up.

Stimulating the male G-spot or the prostate gland that resembles the shape of a chestnut requires gentle probing using the middle finger initially, to about 2 inches inside the anus. And the crowd went wild! Geez! Ever heard of a LUBRICANT you chicken? Your partner can make it even more interesting and exhilarating when coupled with fellatio while probing and applying different levels of pressure and intensity on your G-spot.

Trust this soon-to-be sex guru – after such an experience you would surely need to take a very cold shower to keep the conflagration under control because it is definitely illuminatingly hot when a woman does this to you in exchange for treating her like a queen during foreplay.

5 Reasons Hardcore Anal Sex Isn’t A Good Idea

By

Hardcore anal sex may seem fun for folks into BDSM, but is the backdoor really the best place to get your freak on? The rear entrance isn’t built like a vagina – it’s not meant to stretch very far and it’s definitely not meant to take the kind of abuse that fetishists can deliver. Here’s why hardcore anal sex can hurt – and why you’re better off using the front entrance!

Tearing And Bleeding

This is probably one you’ve heard before. Tearing and bleeding of the rectum can happen at any time, but you are much more at risk for it when engaging in hardcore anal sex and even more so if you’re not using an adequate amount of lubrication.

If enough lube is used and both partners go slow and take their time, allowing the anus to stretch, it is unlikely that tearing or bleeding will occur. However, this is usually not the case with hardcore anal sex. Sometimes partners won’t use enough lube, or may use objects that are too large. Objects that aren’t designed for anal insertion are also often used during hardcore anal sex, which can increase the risk for tears and cuts.

Depends, Anyone?

There are horror stories abound of incontinence after getting busy with the backdoor, but this typically is very rare – that is, if you’re going slow, using lube and allowing ample time for the rectum to stretch and accommodate whatever small sized object you’re trying to insert. Any fan of hardcore anal sex knows that the words “slow” and “small sized” aren’t part of the deal.

Hardcore anal sex puts you at more risk for incontinence because the activity typically involves using very large objects (many of which aren’t designed for this type of use) and insertion and penetration is usually hard and fast. This type of activity really puts a strain on the anus, which after time, can become damaged due to all the rough sex back there. After a certain amount of damage, the rectum just isn’t going to work like it used to.

Which means, you’re not going to be able to control your bowels like you used to. Depends, anyone?

Two Words: Emergency Surgery

A variety of objects are often used during hardcore anal sex, including ones that are not designed for anal insertion. Sex toys that have a wide base on the end are really all you should use for anal penetration, because it prevents the object from getting lost inside the anus. The anus isn’t at all like the vagina – there’s no stopping point. You can’t lose something in a vagina, but you can inside the anus.

If an object gets lost inside the rectum, it usually has to be removed surgically. If the object is sharp at all, is made from glass and might break, contains chemicals, or poses harm to the body in any other way, it must be removed immediately. If a dangerous object is lost inside the colon and is not removed immediately, it can cut the inside of the bowel and cause a lot more problems than you originally bargained for.

Extreme Pain

Pain is often associated with anal insertion, but with enough lube and time to allow the anus to stretch, the discomfort is usually minimal and passes quickly. Not so with hardcore anal sex. Masochists may enjoy the pain associated with hardcore anal sex, but the pain can be quite intense. When large objects are used, or objects that aren’t designed for insertion into the rectum, it can be extremely painful.

Many couples who enjoy hardcore anal sex use a desensitizing lube so they don’t feel as much discomfort. This is actually very dangerous, because you need to feel pain during anal penetration – if not, how will you know when to stop? The pain is your indicator that you’re taking things too far. If you can’t feel the pain because you’ve used a desensitizing lube, you may very well damage your rectum. You won’t feel it until the lube wears off, but you will later. And you’ll regret it!

Hemorrhoids And Anal Prolapse

Hemorrhoids and anal prolapse is very uncommon when you’re talking about normal anal penetration. However, the chances of getting hemorrhoids or having the anus prolapse outside the body increases when you start having hardcore anal sex. When the rectum takes a lot of damage, hemorrhoids will form. These can be simply annoying, or they can be downright painful.

In very rare cases, the bowels can actually begin to prolapse outside of the anus, because the rectum has become too loose to hold them in. This is perhaps the number one deterrent to having hardcore anal sex – do you really want your intestines hanging outside your body? All to get your jollies?

Stick to the front door for rough sex – the vagina can handle it.

6 Ways To Make Anal Sex Better For Her

By

Anal sex is something women do to make their men happy, right? They don’t actually enjoy it, right? Wrong! Lots of women really enjoy anal play. The anus is actually extremely sensitive and when stimulated the right way, can lead to intense and explosive orgasms! Many women enjoy anal play during sex and oral sex, and lots of girls like straight up anal sex and double penetration. However, there’s a lot of guys who don’t know how to make it safe and comfortable for a woman, so she can’t really enjoy it. If a guy doesn’t warm her up enough or use enough lube when engaging in anal play, it’s not going to be fun at all for her – in fact, it will actually be incredibly painful! Here’s how you can make anal sex something she loves.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cgAOYuBSH4M&feature=channel_video_title[/youtube]

Use Enough Lube

The main reason that women don’t enjoy anal sex is that it can hurt and it can hurt bad if it’s not done correctly! One thing that can contribute to pain during anal sex is not having enough lube. Lube is very important during this activity because the anus does not lubricate itself the way a vagina does. Without external lubrication, the anus can become very dry and the delicate tissues can tear and bleed. Don’t be afraid to dump a whole bottle of lube on her butt if you have to – when it comes to this activity, you really can’t use enough lube.

The best lube for anal sex is a water based lube – a silicone lube is thick and can last longer (which is important for prolonged moisture) but it is not as easy to rinse off as water based lube. Search for a good, gentle water based lube that is made in a thicker formula. Never use a desensitizing lube for anal sex! While this may make her more “comfortable” in the beginning, she won’t be aware if the pain becomes too much. This can definitely lead to tears in the anus or bowel that require immediate medical attention. Good water based lube (and plenty of it) is all you need!

Use Small Toys First

Most guys get really excited at the prospect of trying anal sex with their partners and are eager to put their penises in right away. However, unless you’re a really small guy, you may be too big for her if she hasn’t tried anything else. Even with lube, if she’s not accommodated to taking something as large as your penis into her anus, you’re going to have to start smaller and work your way up.

Fingering the anus is a good starting point, since you can use one finger and gradually increase to two or even three fingers once she becomes more comfortable with it. You can also purchase small butt plugs that can be used to get her used to anal stimulation during sex. Even if you’re chomping at the bit to get it on with her backdoor, she’s going to like it a lot better if you don’t bombard her with something huge at first. She’ll also be more receptive to have anal sex more often if it doesn’t hurt!

Give Her Encouragement

Women love to know that they’re giving their men pleasure – and they want to hear about it first hand. While she’s having anal sex with you, don’t be too shy to let her know how much you enjoy it. Let it all out – moan, grunt and gasp so she knows that your pleasure is genuine! You can also give her a few words of encouragement as you’re warming her up with a sex toy or your fingers. Let her know how hot her butt is and how naughty and sexy she is for doing this with you. She’ll love hearing how much you’re enjoying it!

Don’t Act Like Poop Is A Big Deal

A huge reason that women don’t enjoy having anal sex with their partners is that they’re afraid or embarrassed to make a mess. This may keep her from ever having anal sex with you at all – she could be extremely apprehensive about fecal matter coming out during sex and she may think you’ll laugh at her or criticize her for it. Let her know up front that you know it might get dirty – and that it doesn’t bother you in the least. And if it happens – don’t freak out. Have a warm, wet washcloth nearby for clean up and take care of it as soon as you notice. If you can, don’t even mention it to her.

You can also ease her fears about making a mess during anal sex by encouraging her to have a bowel movement first or to do an enema first. Some women even find the enema process pleasurable, and it keeps things clean during sex later.

Make Sure She’s Aroused First

If she’s not aroused, she’s not going to enjoy anal sex, period. Her anus will be tight and puckered, and it won’t relax enough to allow you to put anything in, including your penis. So before you plan on heading to her backyard, play in the front a little first. Give her oral sex and get her really, really turned on. Lick her clitoris and get her to where she’s begging you to finish her off. Then, proceed to warm her up anally and don’t neglect her clitoris when you get started. With a combination of clitoral, anal and even vaginal or g-spot stimulation, you may end up giving her the best orgasm of her life!

Take Care Of Her Afterwards

When you’re finished, don’t just roll over and go to sleep, even if you’re tempted to. Instead, make an attempt to have a conversation with her. Help her get cleaned up, or join her in the shower if that’s what she wants to do afterwards. Let her know how much you enjoyed it and how glad you are that she did it. Let her know that you care about her and show her that you don’t think any less of her. Give her a sensual massage or make her a cup of hot tea to help her relax. Show her that she’s important to you and fulfill her emotionally as well. If you make her feel good emotionally after having anal sex, she’ll definitely want to have it again!

7 Sultry Things That Make His Toes Curl

By

Sex ruts are easy to get into when you’re in a relationship – but they’re not so easy to get out of. Without bringing some new moves to the bedroom, your man starts knowing what to expect – which can be a huge turn off for guys that like to mix it up. Make sex an incredibly new and wonderful experience for your man by surprising him with these sex tips that will blow his mind and leave him gasping for breath.

Suck On A Popsicle – And Then Suck On Him

Make oral sex super cool when the weather is hot by alternating sucking on a Popsicle and sucking on your partner’s penis. This is a great way to experiment with cold temperatures without scaring him off – let’s face it, a guy isn’t going to want you to do nothing but rub ice all over his penis. That’s just too dang cold!

When you suck on the Popsicle, it cools your mouth down quite a bit, but not so much that it is going to be painful for him. As you continue to lick and suck on his member, your mouth heats back up and the process is repeated. He’ll love the feeling of alternating hot and cold, and you’ll love the idea of oral sex being a little bit more fun (and tastier) for you.

Give Him A Handjob With A Masturbator

Most guys don’t use male sex toys when they’re masturbating – they simply just use some lube and their hands. A lot of guys don’t even use lube! Show your man the difference that a sex toy can make when you’re flying solo by introducing it to him during a handjob given by you.

Put some lube on the inside of a masturbation sleeve of your choice and slowly slip it over his member after you’ve gotten him nice and warmed up with your hands. At this point, he’s not going to ask you to stop and he’ll get to experiment with the feeling of a masturbation sleeve even if he’s been a little apprehensive about doing it in the past. He’ll be amazed at the difference in the way it feels!

Let Him Videotape Or Take Pictures Of You

Since guys are such visual creatures, they usually need something like pictures or a video to help them get off, unless you’re there in the flesh of course. If you’re confident that you’re in a relationship with a guy you can trust with something like this, surprise him by allowing him to take a few pictures or even a video of you while having sex or while you’re masturbating. It’s almost guaranteed that a video or pictures of you will be more cherished than any porn he’s ever downloaded.

Give Anal Sex A Try

Your man might not have ever asked you for anal sex (because he’s afraid it will hurt you or he doesn’t want to offend you) but it’s almost a sure thing that he’s thought of doing it with you before. Treat him to something special by letting him know one night that he can try it up your rear if he’d like, but make sure you practice on your own at first.

Buy a small butt plug or just use your fingers (along with plenty of lube) and try inserting them into your anus the next time you’re masturbating. It will be uncomfortable at first, but much easier than if you just let your man try it without ever having prepped yourself.

Next, move up in size until you’re comfortable with inserting something into your anus that is about as thick as your man is. When you actually do let him do it, he’ll be so surprised at the fact that you can take his penis – because he’ll be expecting you to freak out.

Leave Him A Sexy Voicemail While He’s At Work

The sound of your voice – especially during dirty talk – can do wonders for him. Take advantage of this fact and leave him a dirty voicemail on his cell phone while he’s at work. Plan to tell him what you want to do to him when he gets home, or what you want him to do to you. Of course, you can also do a combination of both!

If you’re shy, write it down first so you know what you’re saying and you don’t choke on your words – which is easy to do once you know you’re being recorded. After listening to the message, your man won’t be able to wait to get home and have sex with you. He may have to arrange to leave work early!

Use The Cowgirl Sex Position (With A Twist)

The “Cowgirl” sex position is pretty much just the woman on top position, but with a twist. In the real Cowgirl position, you’re going to sit up instead of laying your torso down onto his. Then, you’re going to take it a step further and lean back, placing your hands behind you on the bed (or whatever surface you’ve chosen for your tryst). This will give him the most incredible view of you and him having sex that he’s ever had. In fact, you may want to wait to let him do the videotaping until you try this!

Practice Your Kegels

You’ve probably heard of Kegel exercises – where you squeeze your vaginal muscles like you’re stopping the flow of urine. These muscles can actually become very strong if you exercise them regularly. Squeezing them during sex can give your man divine waves of pleasure, but not if your muscles aren’t strong enough to actually give him a good squeeze.

Practice your Kegels while he’s not around, or get a pair of Ben Wa balls that will help you exercise your vagina while you go on about your busy day. When you feel that you’re vaginal muscles are comparable to the female Hulk’s, try them out next time you and your partner have sex. Give him a squeeze as he’s pulling out and watch as he gasps and begs for more.

What Is Double Penetration?

By

Anal sex can be even more fun when you involve insertion of an object in the vagina in addition to the anus. It can increase the frequency and intensity of orgasms during sex and it can be just the boost you need if your sex life is in a rut. It can also help you add a whole new level of pleasure to masturbation. But what exactly is double penetration, how do you do it and how do you keep it safe and clean?

What Is Double Penetration?

Usually during sex or masturbation, a man’s penis or a sex toy penetrates the vagina only. During anal sex, a penis or sex toy will penetrate the anus only. With this sex activity, a penis or toy will penetrate the vagina and the anus at the same time. This can be very pleasurable for a woman who enjoys feeling very “full” during sex, and it can increase the amount and intensity of a woman’s orgasms significantly.

For women who have trouble having a g-spot orgasm, double penetration can be the key. The object inserted into the anus actually rubs up against back side of the g-spot, stimulating it from the other side. It also helps push the g-spot forward into the object that is inserted into the vagina, so that it receives more stimulation from the front side as well. Combine stimulation of the clitoris with insertion of an object into the vagina and rectum for a really wild orgasm!

How To Get Started

As with anal sex, it’s important to start small and work your way up. Giant sex toys aren’t the best choice for the first time you try it. Remember that the anus doesn’t stretch like the vagina does and objects that you think are pretty small are actually going to feel very big once you insert them into your rectum. Consider trying a tiny butt plug to begin with, and then work your way up to larger and larger objects as you become more accustomed to bigger sizes.

It’s also important to use a very generous amount of lube during double penetration. The anus does not self lubricate like a vagina does and even small objects will cause pain and may tear the delicate anal tissues if there’s not enough lubricant down there. Lube is inexpensive and available almost anywhere, so there’s really no reason not to use it! Anal sex of any kind is much more pleasurable when everything is going smoothly.

Tools Of The Trade

Unless you’re with two guys, you’re going to have to use a sex toy of some kind in addition to your partner if you want to achieve double penetration. During masturbation, you’re going to need even more equipment. Here’s a breakdown of the different tools of the trade.

During Sex With A Partner

If he’s going to be entering your vagina, you’ll want to have a small butt plug on hand to insert into your rectum. If you’re more advanced with this sex technique, you can try using a larger sex toy for anal sex.

If he’s going to be entering your anus, you’ll want to have a larger sex toy on hand that will provide stimulation of the vagina. This can be as simple as a torpedo vibrator or as complicated as a Rabbit vibrator that stimulates the g-spot and the clitoris at the same time.

During Masturbation

Double penetration is a little different with masturbation since you’ll be doing all the work yourself. The most important thing during masturbation is to find a comfortable position to lie in that allows you full access to both your vagina and anus without restricting the movement of your hands or arms. You may want to have a few pillows on hand to help you do this.

As far as sex toys go, you really can use whatever you want here! Again, if you’re a beginner, choose a smaller sex toy for your anus. If you use a butt plug, both of your hands will be free to operate the sex toy you’re using on your vagina. Some sex toys have components for the anus, the vagina and the clitoris to provide stimulation of all three areas at once.

During A Threesome

This can also be achieved during a threesome if you’re having sex with two men. A lot of women really enjoy the thrill of being penetrated by a man in both the vagina and the anus and this is actually a sexual fantasy that a lot of women have but don’t often get to really act out.

Staying Safe

Because double penetration involves anal sex, there are some things you need to do to make sure everything stays clean and safe.

Use condoms on your sex toys. Do not insert a sex toy into the anus and then into the vagina without first taking the condom used in the anus off and putting a new one on. This prevents serious bacterial infections.

Do not use sex toys in the anus that aren’t designed for anal sex. If it doesn’t have a wide base or a ring on the end of it that prevents the toy from slipping inside the rectum in its entirety, it’s not something you want to use for anal stimulation. If it’s not designed for anal sex, it can slip up inside and get lost, requiring expensive urgent medical care.

If you’re having sex with two men, use condoms. STD’s can be transmitted easily this way, especially if the men swap between the anus and the vagina. As with sex toys, do not allow anal to vagina activity without a fresh condom being put on in between.

Go slow and use lube. The anal tissues can tear and bleed if you’re not using lube, go too fast or are using something that is too large.

If it hurts, stop. Never use desensitizing lube during anal sex because you definitely want to feel it if it hurts, because if it does, you need to stop! Never continue with penetration if there’s pain of any kind.