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7 Things You Have Been Doing Wrong During Anal Sex All This Time

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Anal sex is something many couples try, but are they really getting it right? Maybe not. Are you making these seven anal sex mistakes?

For generations, anal sex has been considered a no-go by women out there. But although this “national epidemic” is widely reported, the reason that the situation is such escapes most men.

The fact is that women, as much as men, are telling researchers more and more often that they would like to experience anal sex. So what’s the deal, where does this contradiction come from? The answer is simple: in the vast majority of cases, it’s the men that the women are complaining about; men don’t know how to do it properly, so that their respective wives and girlfriends really experience the pleasure.

The secret is to persistently commit to fix the problem. If they don’t, the doors to the women’s derrieres will irreversibly slam shut in front of them.

1. You Don’t Think You Need To Learn Anything

When it comes to anal sex, you don’t just rely on your instincts, on what nature taught you unknowingly. You need to come prepared, with your lessons learned, if you want it to be an awesome experience for both of you, the first time and many times that will follow. Anal is not just sticking your penis inside her bootie and shaking it all around. You should be aware of her anatomy, how her body works, what you can do to stimulate her at the right time, etc. If you don’t enter the situation sufficiently informed, you are not going to rock her world, but convince her that “no” was the right answer after all.

2. Your Manual Is Porn

Another thing that confuses you and stops you from performing at your full potential is the misinterpretation given by the porn industry. Anal sex is not as easy to master and straightforward as you see it in your XXX collection. Those movies never show you that you need a lot of time to warm her up properly, the guy never uses lube and he’s hard hitting right from the start, while the girl screams with pleasure.

Professional porn stars are either stretched out or they are using a numbing cream or gel to dull the pain. Another possibility: they start filming after having injected tons of lube inside her bootie and after she’s been aroused to some extent, so that the act seems real and doable. Don’t believe those that are trying to convince you that it’s not a big deal, because, in fact, it is.

3. You Don’t Talk To Her Beforehand

Women are scared. Yes. They get cold sweats and shivers when they think about it and the only thing that would mend this is just a few words of encouragement from your part. Not the “you’ll see, you’ll like it” whispered by surprise, when you’re in bed, not that one. That doesn’t count as the talk. Approach the subject in a non-sexual environment, and make sure you give her all the support, promise of protection and patience she needs.

Take your time and assure her that it will be ok, it will feel good and it won’t hurt. Talk it over. Find out exactly what makes her hesitant to try it and then see what you can do to belie her fears. Communication is a big deal for women; you ought to know that by now.

4. You Don’t Stimulate Her Enough

It is important that she is very turned on before you even go near her derriere. When she’s really heated up, her body is much more open to you than if she is only mildly turned on. She needs to be aching for you to touch her there. Otherwise, instead of giving you the moans and groans and “keep doing it” look, she’ll just respond with a tense grimace. Rub her body all over with lube, get her relaxed with kisses and caresses, maybe a good dose of cunnilingus.

It’s also important to create a non-intimidating, sexy atmosphere. Lower the lights, put some good music, massage her, everything you know she needs in order to loosen up both physically and mentally. Anal sex is not suited for a quickie. Anticipation is one of the greatest sexual tools you have — use it to your advantage.

5. Once You’re There, You Lose Your Focus

Once the hardest part is over and you find yourself inside her, you need to continue to be highly aware of every move you make, since being too rough can cause her considerable pain. You cannot thrust into her anus as hard as you would into her vagina. Take it easy and pay attention to how it is making her feel.

If she tells you to stop, then stop. If she tells you to get out, then get out. If you get selfish and focus on your pleasure over her potential pain, this will probably be the last time you’ll have anal sex with her.

6. You Don’t Let Her Set The Pace

A big part of the fear that women feel when it comes to anal sex is that they are helpless in this game of power play. If you want her to agree to it and also love the experience, let the action happen on her own grounds. Let her hold your penis and guide it slowly inside of her anus. Even if it takes her half an hour to insert an inch, let her do it. If you surprise her with a sudden movement, the thought of having lost the control will make her even more scared. Just talk to her while she’s doing the job, seduce her mind and she’ll really let loose.

7. You Neglect Her Other Lady Parts

The sensation of touching the anus or rectum alone may feel uncomfortable for your girl, but couple it with penetration or oral sex, and suddenly it’ll feel much better. If you keep her mind busy with an awesome clitoral orgasm, she won’t mind the back action that much. For example, while you’re fingering her anus, kiss her really deep on the mouth, so that she feels you’re still connected.

6 Super Naughty Fingering Tips

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Fingering isn’t played out – at least these hotter than fire tips aren’t! Here’s how to engage in fingering with your girl and give her a WET orgasm!

1. Stirring The Pot

Another great all-round stimulator, this little trick allows you to stimulate the circumference of the vaginal wall at just about any depth, and is another type of sensation she may have never before experienced.

With one or two fingers inserted, slowly begin to make clockwise circles around the entire vaginal canal – bottom, left side, top, right side. You can change which direction your finger pads point to mix things up, or switch directions. Try to keep it up while thrusting!

2. Twist & Shout

A very special move using two to three fingers, this one allows you to stimulate her G or A-Spot, her clitoris, her urethra, her inner and outer labia; her entire vulva, in fact. A favorite in our house, this one has just the kind of sensations that are guaranteed to bring me over the edge after some stimulating massage and stretching.

Using your index and possibly your middle finger, penetrate and find the G-Spot, (or A-Spot, depending on how deep it is and how long your fingers are) thereby creating a “C” shape out of your hand, so that your thumb curls around to cover her clitoris. The sensitive inner webbing of your hand will cover her inner labia, and can stimulate her U-Spot here as well.

Once in position, slowly begin to twist your wrist from side to side, keeping your arm stationary. Not only will this rock back and forth inside her, causing her to lubricate and possibly squirt, but the changing pressure on her clit at just the right rhythm is certain to be a show-stopping favorite.

3. Upping The Ante

If you’re feeling extra frisky, you can add a second digit to any of the moves described above, either massaging her perineum and anus or fingering her clitoris. If you can figure out using multiple fingers and your tongue at the same time, you’re golden!

4. Three, Four And More

As she turns on, her vagina will begin to stretch and expand, preparing to accommodate something a bit bigger than a finger or two. As this happens, your wife will probably be interested in more stimulation, which is where these more complex moves come in. If you are still learning to read your wife’s reactions, take your time here to work up to them. She needs to be communicative; not just to ensure her pleasure here, but to avoid any unwanted pain.

5. The Three-Way

You can modify the Twist & Shout position above, with two fingers inserted to hit her G-Spot and A-Spot at the same time, along with her clitoris and possibly her urethra. Doesn’t that sound like the kind of party you want to get in on? As she turns on, her vagina will begin to stretch and expand, preparing to accommodate something a bit bigger than a finger or two.

As this happens, your wife will probably be interested in more stimulation. With your two fingers inserted deeply, trace your middle finger toward you, along the front wall of the vagina, until you find the A-Spot. Keep the finger in place as you crook your index finger closer yet, finding the G-Spot just inside the vaginal opening. Now that you have both spots in hand, you can reach your thumb for her clit.

In this position, you can both twist at the wrist as I mentioned earlier, and thrust very gently with your inserted fingers in the come-hither motion to stimulate all her special spots!

6. The Pubic Press

This movement actually puts a bit of pressure on her uterus and ovaries, giving you an opportunity to stimulate these internal reproductive organs from inside her vagina. Some women may find this a bit uncomfortable, if they aren’t used to it, so go slowly and gently and get lots of feedback. With your fingers inside her, let the heel of your other hand find her pubic bone.

Just above her mons and below her abdomen, you can press down to gently move her internal reproductive system closer to the vaginal canal, and the clitoral tissue that surrounds it. Thrusting in this position can be incredibly pleasurable.

How To Get Him To Reign In His Pubic Hair

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Shaving for a guy can often be an afterthought, but if you’re giving him head, he needs to keep his pubic hair under control. Here’s how to get him to do it.

While being clean is the first step to preparing for a great blowjob, you don’t want to completely overlook pubic hair. Wild, unkempt pubic hair can ruin fabulous oral sex, so make sure you and your partner agree on what kind of down there grooming he needs to do.

While you don’t want to have a conversation about how much he stinks and needs to take a shower because this can put a big nick in his self esteem, the same is not true of the pubic hair conversation. It is perfectly appropriate to discuss how pubic hair affects you when you’re giving him head and your opinions on how he can handle his bush.

Talking To Him About It

Don’t broach the subject right before sex. Even though it’s fine to talk about what to do with his pubes, it’s still not a conversation you want to be having right before you’re about to get it on. So talk about it after sex, or while you’re having breakfast the next morning. Choose a benign time to bring it up and don’t be critical about it. Simply tell him that it would make giving oral sex easier for you if he had more control over the growth of his pubic hair.

Remember though, you’re only offering opinions on what he could do with it that would make giving him a blowjob better for you. You are not the decision maker, nor can you force him to shave or wax if he’d prefer to go au natural. The end decision is his, but you certainly have the right to weigh in, considering it’s your face down there, not his.

Trimming

Trimming is probably one of the most popular male pubic hair grooming options. Trimming is easy and fast, and makes a guy feel less vulnerable than shaving or waxing does. To be honest, most men trim. All he needs to do is take a beard trimmer (works better than a hair trimmer because it is smaller and can more accurately trim angled areas) and use an attachment that will trim the hair at the length he wants. If he likes a lot of hair, you can compromise by using a longer trimming attachment that still keeps his mane under control without making him feel like he’s getting ready to slide into a Speedo.

If you would like his penis completely bald but he says there’s no way he’s going there, compromise with a close trim. A close trim is actually a favorite among couples, because it’s virtually impossible for a woman to get a pube stuck in her teeth during oral sex if he’s trimmed almost down to the skin, and men like it because the closer the trim, the larger his penis looks. If you have trouble convincing him to groom, let him know that it’s a proven fact that a penis looks smaller when it’s drowning in pubic hair.

If he gets his bush under control, he could easily add 2” to his visible penis length. This is usually all it takes to sell a guy on keeping his pubic hair trimmed. While many men are going to prefer trimming themselves, there are going to be a few hard to reach places. Offer to trim for him, but don’t be surprised if he turns you down.

Shaving

Shaving is another option, one that many guys couple with trimming, depending on how they like their pubic hair to look. Shaving is totally up to him – because many guys don’t like it. Shaving can cause wicked shaving bumps (sound familiar?) and it can be super uncomfortable when it grows back. And no, men won’t consider what they prefer on a woman during cunnilingus when they’re taking their own pubic hair status into account. He’ll never sympathize with you on shaving bumps, razor burn and itchy regrowth. He’ll still want you to shave.

If your man does shave, it’s unlikely that he’ll shave it all off, although some guys do prefer to do that and like the completely bald look. Or, he may shave everywhere except for a patch of hair in the front, like a woman’s “landing strip.” Either way, shaving is a lot of upkeep for a guy and doesn’t make that much of an impact on giving head, unless you want to lick and suck him from top to bottom and plan putting everything from his cut lines to his anus in your mouth. Then, you might want him to shave. But it’s still his call.

Waxing

Almost no guy will wax his pubic hair. Guys aren’t usually into taking pain for the sake of perceived beauty the way women are. Women are raised to believe that if it makes you look better, it doesn’t matter if it hurts. Not so with guys – they’d rather look like Chewbacca than pull all their pubes out by the root in one fell swoop.

So don’t suggest waxing to your guy – just don’t. He’ll probably look at you like you’re nuts or think you get off on causing guys immeasurable pain. However, if you are with one of the few guys who do prefer waxing as their means of pubic hair grooming, good for you. Be thankful he cares that much.

Once your man has completed his grooming ritual, do not forget to let him know how much his newly manscaped genitals turn you on. Lavish them with lots of attention, and don’t skimp on the praise. And of course, make sure you’re groomed too when he goes to return the favor. If you want him to trim or shave, you’d better not look like you stepped out of a time machine from the 70’s when he takes your pants off.

The REAL Truth About The G-Spot (And How To Find It!)

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The g-spot is often considered the holy grail of sex – if you can find her g-spot and get her to orgasm with it, you’re in for a wild ride! Here’s how.

Who Invented The G-Spot?

Nobody! It has always been there, silently awaiting discovery.

In the 1950’s, Dr. Grafenberg (hence the term “G”-spot) discovered the zone. Of course, he was ecstatic to write about it, but like most great finds, his work has to undergo the painful process of gathering dust in the bookshelves. For the next 30 years, nobody paid it much attention. Then came 1982. Dr.’s Whipple, Perry and Ladas did more extensive study on the area, and it was with the publishing of their work on the G-spot that consciousness really caught on.

Where Is It?

The G-spot is located between the back of the pubic bone and the cervix. That means you’re dealing here with the TOP WALL of her vagina.

Unlike the clitoris, the g-spot is stimulated INTERNALLY. Hunting for it is best done when a woman lies on her back, bringing her knees to her chest. Here’s what you do: Palms up, slowly and teasingly insert your middle and index fingers 2-3 inches into the vagina. Then point your fingers up, remember the area is behind the pubic bone. Now, imagine you’re beckoning somebody to come to you. Simulate that “Come Here” finger motion by curling your fingers back towards the wrist.

You’ll know you’ve hit the spot because the texture there is different from the adjacent areas. It feels rough and you may find a raised spot or ridge. On average, it’s the size of a pea. You’ll feel it become firm & engorged when the lady is aroused. She’ll know when you’re there because she’ll feel something different.

While performing all this hunting inside, position your other palm a few inches below her belly button. Gently but firmly press towards your fingers inside. This bearing down helps isolate the G zone and results in more intense sensations.

How To Find & Stimulate The G-Spot

Do not consider the it as merely a pea-sized locale – it’s better to think of it as a zone or region. Begin by fingering her and let your fingers play around and stimulate areas adjacent to the rough spot itself. This indirectly stimulates the g-spot and animates your partner as you go nearer and nearer the post.

You may utilize 1-3 fingers, but more than that, when it comes to curling, you could execute simultaneously or serially. Again, these will seem trivial to you, but these simple variations have profound effects on the woman whose core you’re invading. A woman notices the tiny details men couldn’t care less of.

Do vertical and horizontal firm sweeps of the area. Run circles around the spot. You may also execute a 2-finger squeeze using the forefinger and the middle finger.

But I Still Can’t Find It!

Let’s make this clear, the G-spot is not found inside the vagina, it is accessed through the vagina. And if you would have any chance of finding it, you need to apply FIRMER, DEEPER PRESSURE. Firmer than the ones you use for the clit – do not baby the G-spot.

Simply rubbing the area won’t work, as pressure is needed to get THROUGH the vaginal walls. No matter how many thousand curls you administer, doing it with insufficient pressure won’t result in any heavenly experience. Men who have been stirring the same zone without result suddenly struck gold just by making the wonderful mistake of increasing pressure. They were dead-on all this time, but the pressure just wasn’t enough.

You don’t want weak, tentative fingers curling back and forth. You want well-trained marines to get in and get the job done, troops that are confident and know exactly what they’re doing.

It’s not a cavity exam, but be firm with it.

Unfortunately, for women with very thick vaginal linings, access to the G-spot may not even be possible.

I Swear Man, My Girl Doesn’t Have One!

She has one, they all have one. You just expected her reaction to be “Oh Danny that feels so good. Don’t stop. Please don’t stop!”

All eyes may be for seeing, and ears for hearing, but stimulating the G-spot has DIFFERENT EFFECTS for DIFFERENT WOMEN. Some love it and orgasm only through it, some don’t. Some are very sensitive, others couldn’t care less.

When a guy plays with a woman’s G, she will typically feel the need to pee. Why? Because the area you’re dealing with runs alongside her bladder, that’s why. (Just to be sure, make her pee before proceedings begin). When you continue with the stimulation, that need to urinate will gradually turn into a feeling of pleasure. And that pleasure, nurtured will soon result into a raging, wet and possibly squirting orgasm.

OR, stimulation may get you nothing. A woman may simply feel NOTHING. That’s right, NOTHING. In that case, you stop and watch “Friends” reruns instead.

But that doesn’t mean you’ll go nowhere with her every time. Her sensitivity and your skill will improve as you clock in several sessions. For all you know, she may feel zilch that evening, but on a different night, it’ll be gold. She can have different reactions on different occasions, so don’t give up so easily.

OR, a woman will hate every irritating minute of it. That’s right, it can have a negative effect on her. In that case, stop stimulation, turn on the TV and watch “Seinfeld” reruns instead.

Women can have different G-Spot reactions. When people expect it to work in the same manner, for all women, every time, that’s when the debate on its existence and purpose really heats up.

People have been conditioned to think that G-Spot stimulation will always shoot her through the stratosphere. Truth is, sometimes it’ll work, sometimes it will work against you. Sometimes she’s crazy about it, sometimes not so much. There will even be times when you’ll think her spot has disappeared or will doubt if you’ve actually found the real deal when she’s not as responsive as before!

You may have to awaken and train her G-spot in the first place – over a period of several sessions. Such is the nature of the Grafenberg Spot. So when dealing with it, better check your ego at the counter.

6 Side By Side Sex Positions That Will Leave Her Breathless

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Sex positions will ramp up your sex life in ways you never thought possible! Try these killer “cuddle” sex positions that your girl will absolutely LOVE!

Sideways sex positions are more of a hybrid than a category of positions in their own right; they offer all the benefits of rear-entry without the physical taxation that most partners experience doing it doggy style. Side-by-side sex also offers unique angles for penetration and usually a strong G-Spot aspect, all of which are beneficial to your gal’s bottom line. The perfect time to try a sideways sex position is when either (or both) of you need a bit of a relaxing sex session, or have exhausted yourself before reaching the Big O.

1. Three Quarter Cross

Lie your partner down on her side with her hand supporting her head. Bend her knees and get her to lift one of her legs. Lie on your side and squeeze in between her legs so that your bodies form a T. Put yourself into her, and lean forward slightly. Hold onto her hip for support and thrust into her. She can move her upper leg to determine how much you can penetrate, and it’ll be easier for you if you use her upper leg to prop yourself up.

CLIMAX CUE

Both of your hands are free to play with her breasts or clitoris, so move around to make sure it’s comfy for you both before going to town. Your legs are also in a prime position to rub up against her mons pubis and clitoral hood, and she can tilt her groin towards you to increase the pressure. Because this is an easy position for both of you to perform, use it when she knows it might be a while for her to orgasm, or when either of you are in the mood for a long, languorous love session.

2. Just Chillin’

You’ll need a bench or the side of the bed for this position. Have your lover lie down on one side with her legs bent, right at the side of the bed or bench. Get her to raise up her top leg so her knee points toward the ceiling, and put your whole body in the hole her legs create. Put your outside leg on the ground and place your other leg on the bench or bed. Hook her leg in the air with your elbow and pull it tight in to your body before entering her. You can move by pushing with your legs or moving her captured leg under your arm, and she can rotate her hips or clench her buttocks for some extra tension.

CLIMAX CUE

Even while moving your penis inside your partner, you’ll still be closely connected in the most intimate of ways. This is a really snug position where clitoral contact is almost constant but it is definitely more of a grinding movement than a thrust. You can put a bit of power behind the movement if you like, really pushing her up and down along your penis, which will thrill many women immensely. Just make sure that your pubic bone is in constant contact with her mons pubis and labia, and you’ll be well poised for the kind of stimulation she’ll need for orgasm.

3. Leg Up On The Competition

Start with your partner on her side with her knee on top bent to face the ceiling. Have her grab onto the ankle of her bent leg for support. Lie down on top or beside your partner, depending on how your bodies line up, then hook your top leg over her bent leg and put your foot on the ground for support. Leave your other leg straight, and line it up with your partner’s outstretched limb, perhaps intertwining your legs if you so desire.

Put your hands above her head to use as leverage. In this position, you can move as you would if you were in missionary position, just at a slightly different angle. You have full control over the depth of penetration and the speed in which you do it in this position, so mix it up a little!

CLIMAX CUE

There’s a lot of depth to this position, and she’s wide open for the taking. You are raised up higher than you normally would be in plain ole missionary style, so you will be hitting her clitoris exactly where she needs it. She can control the angle of penetration by rolling from side to side and taking you along for the ride.

4. The Figure Eight Mambo

Your partner lies on her side with her knees bent, her ankles touching and her legs parted as wide as she can. Have her prop herself up on the arm beneath her. Lie down in front of her on your side and face her feet. Slowly move forward until she has to open her legs even more to accommodate your body, and your pelvic areas meet. Get her to wrap her legs around you, and do the same to her. Insert yourself into her. You may have to move down her body somewhat, press your penis down, and have her tilt her bum toward the ceiling to fit. Either of you can move by pushing forward, backward, or to either side.

HOW TO GET HER TO ORGASM USING THIS POSITION

The magic of this position, as with most sideways positions, is in the tilting of her body. She can rock back and forth to find the perfect angle, and you can thrust away while she’s looking. Both your hands are free to play with buttocks, nipples and other sexy parts, and you’ve both got a great view of the action. She can also grind herself on your leg or tuck her hips up for more clitoral stimulation.

5. Scissors

Lie down next to each other, with your feet at each other’s head. Have her spread her legs with her knees bent, and squirm your way over so that one leg is underneath her lower leg, and the other lies between her parted thighs. Join together by entering her, and hold onto her knee which should end up around your armpit or mid-torso so you can push against her. Her leverage comes from planting her body into the bed, and holding onto your bent leg closest to her. Move by pulling on her leg, pushing with your hips, or opening and closing her legs.

CLIMAX CUE

Quite a few of these sex positions look a lot more complex than they really are, and this is one pays off in spades, if you just give it a try. When you push your upper thigh down, you will rub up against her pleasure palace. Grinding and shallow movements are the name of the game, and the highly unusual angle offers some amazing sensations. She can easily play with herself as well, or move around to ensure she’s getting the clitoral stimulation required for orgasm, and can even make eye contact with she really wants to feel connected.

6. Reverse Snuggle

Lay down on your side with your body straight and legs together. Have her lay down next to you, facing away and also on her side, with her head at your feet and her buttocks pressed firmly into your crotch. Enter her from behind, asking her to move further down your body and tilt her bum towards her belly button if you have a hard time entering her. Move with either her pushing back against you, or you pushing into her.

CLIMAX CUE

It’ll be a tight squeeze getting into position, but one well worth trying out. With her legs held together, you’ll both feel every inch of one another, and there are few positions like this one for G-Spot play because your penis will push right up inside where it needs to be. Both of you can reach over and play with her clitoris, and she can also get some breast stimulation if she chooses to masturbate. Either of you can control how fast sex propels her toward orgasm, all without anyone expending too much effort to get there.