Knowing how to approach women is a vital skill every man needs to know, because approaching women is the first step in creating a relationship with the girl of your dreams…

You have to know how to approach a girl in the right manner  if you want to have success with your pickup.

The following are some proven tips I’d recommend you do to help you be successful in meeting women!  Remember a situation where you were going to approach a girl, and before you could even get a single word out, she freaked out and simply rejected you?

Know this – getting shot down has little to do with what you were going to say or what your intentions were.  It’s all about how you go about actually approaching your target. It’s important to do this right the first time, because it’s hard to recover when you make a mistake right off the bat. The key to approaching women is to approach them in a NON-THREATENING manner that does not telegraph your interest.

This is known as “coming in under the radar.”

Understand: Most women have trained themselves to just REJECT men outright when they sense they are being picked up on. This is because women get hit on SO MUCH by men, they just don’t want to deal with yet another guy coming up and wasting their time.

But despite all this, the girl WILL be receptive to you if you know how to approach her in the RIGHT WAY.

So what’s the right way to approach a woman?

Act fast!

First – YOU MUST ACT FAST.

If you hesitate and let the opportunity pass you by, you’re never going to experience success.  Giving yourself time to talk yourself out of approaching a girl will never get you
anywhere, so it’s important you act quickly and JUST DO IT.

Know what to say before you say it

Secondly, know what you’re going to start the conversation with BEFORE you approach the girl.  This will make meeting women much easier because you don’t have to spend time
thinking of what to say before you feel comfortable walking up to meet her. When it comes to a situation like this, you should probably have a good, proven “pick up line” memorized that will help start a conversation.

But don’t confuse the term “pick up line” with sleazy saying like “Nice shoes, let’s have sex!”  The goal here is to be NON-THREATENING, remember?

The best lines usually engage the girl in an innocent conversation. You can do so by asking her opinion on something and then following that up with more questions. When approaching a woman, it’s important that you approach her from an ANGLE.  Most guys charge towards the girl they want to meet like they’re marching to war!  Coming in at an angle is much less  confrontational and will put the girl at ease on a subconscious level.

Practice, practice, practice

Remember: great pick ups can only happen when the girl is comfortable with you. That’s why it’s so important for YOU to feel comfortable when you’re talking to girls! If you’re not  comfortable approaching women, the best way to overcome it is to go out there and start approaching women right away! After all, practice makes perfect, right?

The sad fact is, you’re not going to get good at approaching women if all you do is sit around reading about it and studying it like a test.  If you want to get good and have success, you actually have to go out and DO IT so you can build your experience level. (The good news – it gets easier the more you do it!)

If you’re worried about being rejected, just look at it as a game. The ONLY thing you’re doing is approaching women. You’re not asking her out, you’re not trying to get her into
bed, your only goal is to carry on some type of conversation.

That’s all you need to do!

See how many girls you can talk to in one night, and keep trying to beat your score.

Using time constraints

One last note – try and use a “time constraint” whenever you approach a woman.  This is as easy as  saying you can only talk for a minute before you have to run.

Effective use of time constraints will better engage the woman you’re talking to, because she won’t feel that she’s committing to a time-consuming endeavor.  Instead, you’re only a momentary “distraction.”  This helps eliminate any reason to reject you right off the bat.

If the initial approach goes well and the conversation continues, she will eventually forget you said you can only talk for a “minute” and you can talk as long as you want. The whole point is just to get your “foot in the door.”

The dating game is a numbers game.  The more women you’re able to meet, the greater your chances at finding a great girlfriend, and possibly even a future wife.

To find out more, sign up for Joseph Matthew’s free Meet Women Secrets newsletter for all the most recent tips and methods for meeting and seducing women.

I’m a big believer in self talk.  Over the last couple of years, I’ve learned that the things we tell ourselves determine our outcomes.  If you fill your mind with positive thoughts, then you’ll achieve quality results.  On the other hand, when think pessimistically, you’ll end up with only negative outcomes.

There’s an expression that best sums up this outlook- “Garbage in, garbage out”

What this means is when you fill your mind with negative thoughts, you severely limit your success in life.  The funny thing is we men use self-talk so much that it’s become a major part of our dating lives.  We often “convince” ourselves that we’re not “worth” dating the truly desirable women.

Negative thoughts often take the form of a “Self-Limiting Belief”.   The definition is simple- A self limiting belief is any sort of self-talk that limits your ability to achieve something.

It’s called “limiting”, because you literally limit your capacity to do well in life.  And in the dating sense, a self-limiting belief is any thought that prevents you from succeeding with women.

In my experience, there are a number of beliefs that hold men back.  In order to improve your success with women, it’s important that you identify these thoughts, then actively eliminate them.

Here are 7 of the most common self-limiting beliefs:

#1- “I want somebody to love the REAL me…”

I’m going to be honest here.  Guys use this belief as an excuse to be lazy.  Many secretly desire a change to their life, but don’t want to make any effort.  So they think that coming up with some line about “being themselves” will somehow make them morally superior to the men who seek outside help.

The truth is, many guys require some guidance with meeting women.  Don’t make an excuse about wanting a woman to love the “real you”.  Instead, try to understand that life should be about constant improvement.  If you want success with women, you need to get out there and find out what really attracts them.

#2- “Love will find me…Eventually”

I once heard a great story about a man who prays to God every day about winning the lottery.  After weeks of having nothing happen, he finally screams at God and asks why his prayers go unanswered.  Seconds later, he hears a booming voice that says: “Buy a lottery ticket!”

The belief that “love will find me eventually” is another excuse that limits your success.  Don’t sit around waiting for the “dating lottery ticket” to arrive.

In order to improve your life, you must be willing to get out there and put yourself in a position to meet women.  It won’t happen if you believe the woman of your dreams will magically show up with little to no effort on your part.

#3- “I’m not good-looking…”

This is one of my favorites!  We men have it lucky in the dating game.  While our attraction to a woman is built primarily on HER looks, they look for something completely different.

A woman’s attraction starts when she makes an emotional connection to a guy.  Sure, looks are an important element.  But, any guy can improve his conversation skills to the point where they can transcend a deficiency in his looks.

#4- “I never have anything interesting to say…”

Guys often let nervousness and anxiety affect their conversations with women. The end result is their mind goes blank and they have trouble thinking of things to say.

The truth is we ALL have interesting things to say!  But sometimes, it takes a little coaxing to get them out.

A technique I recommend to my readers is to cultivate a unique personality through the art of storytelling.  Women are strongly attracted to things like health, status, adventure, leadership, wealth, and preselection.

When you craft a story from your own life, with these traits in mind, you’ll have plenty of material to use when there’s a lull in the conversation.

#5- “Some guys are just naturally successful with women…”

This self limiting belief is another personal favorite.  A lot of guys think there’s no way they can change their success with women.  What they don’t know is this is an area of their life that is like any other skill.  It involves a process that’s easily learnable and predictable.

Think of it this way.  Everything you’ve learned in your life started out as something you didn’t know how to do.  Only through learning and practicing were you able turn it into a skill.

Learning how to attract women is the same way!  With the right kind of information, you can easily become proficient at meeting interesting girls.

#6- “I have no confidence around women”

A lack of confidence is common among single men.  What’s unfortunate is this is the one quality that’s incredibly unattractive to women.  So, in order to improve your success with women, you must overcome the notion that you can’t be confident when meeting a new girl.

Confidence comes from competence in a skill. In the last belief, I discussed how you can improve your success simply through learning and practice.  As you work on your “dating skills”, you’ll discover it’s easy to dramatically improve your self-esteem.  While you might feel that you lack confidence now, this is something that can be easily fixed through repeated success!

#7- “I’ll start tomorrow, or maybe next week…”

This belief is the creed of all serial procrastinators.  Almost every single guy in the world feels he’s missing something in his life.  Some might say they want to make a change.  But most of the time, they’ll put off doing something about it.

If you want success with women, then it’s time to do something about it.  Don’t delay. Do something right NOW!  Even the simple step of writing down a plan of action can have a dramatic effect on your dating life.  The only thing that’s holding you back is allowing limited thinking to prevent you from making a change!

Self limiting beliefs can restrict your success.  When you allow negative thought patterns to be in control, the opportunities to date quality women will be quickly diminished.

Here’s some simple advice.  ANY time you experience one of the negative thoughts I’ve just described, immediately challenge it!  You’ll discover that the simple act of working through your self-talk will have an immediate effect on your success with women.

Are You Tired of Striking Out Night After Night?

Most guys think that women like ‘bad’ boys so they try to portray this image and simply end up looking like a jerk. What a woman really wants is a man who will keep her interest, has great confidence, who is not afraid to stand out, and is not afraid to disagree with the status quo – A guy who is comfortable in his own skin…

Here’s a great article on approaching women from David Wygant, one of today’s most popular and successful dating coaches. David is not a ‘pick up artist’, but a real dating coach who offers good solid advice that actually works. In this article, he talks about some of the biggest mistakes that almost all men make when approaching women and how you can avoid them and actually capture her attention and create a real spark.

Most men think that they need a clever line to approach a woman, which in some cases may garner a reaction. But through all my years of coaching men and women I have found that it is not what you say that’s important, but how you approach.

Most women put more importance on visual clues to assess a man’s character. They don’t care what you say as long as you say it without hesitation and with authority. Unfortunately, most men don’t know this, so they walk over and approach a woman like a wounded animal expecting to be rejected.

When you approach like a wounded animal you will be rejected every single time no matter how clever of a line or remark you may have. Sound familiar?

With eighty percent of human interaction based on non-verbal body language, what is a man to do?

The key to impressing her right off the bat is you need to be different than all other men that are approaching her that evening in the bar or lounge. It is really competitive at night, and most women will start to lose interest in men after a few jerks have hit on them, so you need to learn to use a few of these tips to make you stand out from the crowd of drunk testosterone-laden men.

Here a few sure-fire ways to make your approach more powerful and convincing even if you are not sure what you are going to say:

1. When you see a woman that you are attracted to you need to walk right over.

Stand up straight and walk over slowly but with confidence. Make sure your chest is puffed out and your posture is looking strong and not slumped over. You need to keep eye contact as you approach so you do not spook her. You also need to walk directly over to her without any hesitation.

With practice, you will get comfortable doing this. Most men linger in the background like a scared animal for a period of time before they approach. When they finally do approach, the woman is quick to turn her back on him. The reason is he did not exude confidence.

Most women notice who is observing them. When you do not approach within seconds of spotting her you might as well go home and get your game on for another night or day.

2. When out on the town, avoid being seen with the drunken testosterone pack of males.

One of the biggest turn-offs for women is the “male pack” — you with five of your buddies high-fiving each other, drinking and checking out other women. Yes, women make note of this childlike behavior and when you approach them with your buddies waiting on the sideline they will impulsively reject you in front of the pack to avoid being scrutinized later. You need to break away from the male pack and find one other guy who is like you to go out on the town with.

Save the male bonding and excessive testosterone for a sports bar.

3. Dress in clothing that gives you a strong appearance.

Make sure you’re not sabotaging your efforts with your attire. Following the steps above will fall short of projecting great body language if you are wearing a pair of baggy khakis and ratty sneakers out at night. If you look like a slob it will not matter what your body language says because you will look like every other man who put no thought into what he was going to wear that night to attract women.

Start buying clothing that makes you stand out from the rest of the men. Find a cool pair of jeans and some great shirts that give you an edge so when you walk into a bar or lounge with the right body language women will see you. When you are dressed the part, women will give you a double take and follow your every move. Keep in mind shoes are really important too, so find a few pairs that look great on you.

4. After you walk over you need to create a spark within her.

Most men’s conversation will center on being agreeable and non-confrontational in the hope that she likes him. The key word here is “hope” — That is the mindset of the average man. They are so jazzed that she is actually speaking with him, so they play it safe and hope that she likes him.

In the mind of a woman, playing it safe equals boring!

So you need to spark her interest by being a bit disagreeable. For example, you get into the conversation about summer movies and she says that Spiderman III was her favorite Spidey movie so far. The typical male would agree with her even if his opinion is that the first Spiderman was superior. Instead of being agreeable, you would look her right in the eye with confidence and tell her that she is so wrong — the first Spiderman was superior. Then proceed to tell her why you think so. This will create a fun, friendly, flirtateous verbal sparring which will create a spark in her brain.

She will realize that you are not a pushover like most men and attraction will start to form in her head.

5. Maintain some tension after you meet.

Flirting with women is all about gathering information, so the better listener you are, the more you will know about her. So when you call her you will have many things to speak with her about. What I like to do is, before I call I think about everything she said and then I pick the most juicy topic or opinion and challenge her with it.

For example, going back to the example of Spiderman III, I would text her the next day and challenge her with this text:
I was thinking U & I need 2 re-watch Spiderman. U R so wrong. Name the time & place & I’ll bring the DVD.

By challenging her, you are bringing her back to a moment of tension that she shared with you. She will immediately respond to the challenge and text you back. You have just learned the secret of re-creating the tension that you shared with her plus you are being totally unlike every other guy who waits three days to call her and schedule a predictable dinner date.

The secret to capturing her attention and creating that spark is do not be like everyone else. Follow the above tips and you will become the alpha male that women desire.