lying – Page 3

Do You Now This Surefire Way To Catch A Liar Without Looking Suspicious Youself?

Like most people, I’m sure you hate being lied to. In short, other people’s lies make our lives more difficult to live.

The problem most people who think they’ve been lied to face, apart from finding out the truth, is confronting the person that’s been conning them. It’s a really tricky social situation – what if, by some chance, they weren’t lying?

Or what if they were lying but won’t admit it and instead just choose to blindly deny being deceptive? Dozens of questions and uncertainties make tackling a liar and untangling theirs lies a difficult task for anyone to face. But there ARE things you can do to help you succeed.

We’re going to look at just one technique of many that you can use to first discreetly acquire additional, hard proof of someone’s untruthfulness, and then use to confidently confront them safe in the knowledge that they cannot possibly deny what they’ve done…your evidence is simply too strong and damning. It’s called…

False Fact Contribution

This discreet detection technique is a favorite of many skilled natural lie detectors, purely because of its high level of effectiveness and reliability. In involves the adding of a fictional fact of your own that relates to their suspected lie, expressed as the truth, to evoke a telling response from them that you can use as a measure of their reliability.

Here’s an example. Your partner has supposedly been to the movies with a friend, but you have a sneaking suspicion that they may not be telling you the truth. When they return home you casually say hi in a non-threatening, relaxed way.

Once you have eye contact with them, you mention hearing on the radio that there was a massive road traffic accident outside of the movie theater and ask if it caused them any trouble when they had to leave. Now, if your partner IS lying, they are in a might tricky situation.

Do they go along with what you’ve said, assuming it to be true, and say that they saw the accident scene and got out fine, or do they risk saying they saw nothing? The key to using the false fact contribution technique lies in making the fact you use something they cannot have possibly missed (if it were true).

What You’ll Get

This means you’ll get a usable, telling response from them. Either they’ll make a reference to it and therefore expose their dishonesty. Or, having actually gone to the movies, they’ll say, truthfully, that they saw nothing. In this scenario, you quite casually brush the whole thing, and say you must have misheard the road name on the radio or something along those lines.

Remember, take note of how your partner, or whoever you’re using this technique on, reacts when you contribute the false fact. Watch for changes in their body language, a lessening of eye contact and any attempts they make to quickly change or ignore the subject you’ve raised. Looking for these signs give you the best chance of acquiring what you deserve: the truth.

3 Common Signs Your Partner May Be Cheating On You

By jimwalthby

An unfaithful husband, cheating wife, any kind of disloyal partner, is an ugly prospect. And that feeling of being betrayed by someone we thought we could trust more than anyone else is one of the worst.

People who discover their partners have been unfaithful to them go through a hurricane of different emotions – anger, sadness, shame, dejection, sometimes even relief. It’s a grieving process, not of a person that’s died, but of a relationship and level of trust that’s instantly disintegrated. In short, it sucks.

But before you can begin “grieve” that loss of trust, or simply throw caution to the wind and ditch your partner for good, you need to make absolutely sure your reaction will be 100% warranted. You need to know without doubt whether your lover has, in fact, double-crossed you by looking for, finding, and partaking in, an affair.

The only guaranteed way of knowing this, aside from finding damning physical evidence or seeing the affair with your own eyes (both pretty rare), is by hearing a confession straight from the horse’s mouth, by communicating your suspicions with your partner and listening to what they have to say however heartbreaking or relieving their response might be.

But before you take that big step, there are a few simpler and smaller steps you can take to make the whole process, the whole “investigation” and confrontation of your partner, easier and more factually accurate.

The first thing you should do is look for some of the most common signs/groups of signs people produce when they cheat. I’ve listed 3 of them below. Read over and think about each and carefully consider if they apply to you, your partner and your relationship.

1. Changes in sex drive and sexual behavior

Sex is almost always an integral part of a happy and healthy relationship between two people. So when one of the two, regardless of whether it’s the guy or the girl, begins to cheat, it doesn’t come as any surprise that changes in the way they feel about having sex with their partner can be brought about. There are two main ways these changes can manifest themselves.

When the cheater initially begins their affair they may, out of guilt and in an effort to avoid the newly formed affair being rumbled, actually increase the amount of attention they pay their real partners in bed. Conversely, and usually a little while after the affair has begun, the cheater may appear to have a loss of sex drive.

They, for some reason, seem to not want to be intimate with you as much as they used to. Once again, this can be attributed to guilt, but more often it’s to do with a fear they’ll reveal their infidelity through they way they behave before, during and after having sex with you.

2. Peculiar changes in habits & schedule

When people cheat, they invariably change their behavior and/or habits in some way, small or large. The reason they cannot avoid these alterations is because, no matter how infrequently or secretly they see the person they’re having an affair with, they MUST, at some point or another, go out of their way to do so (and thereby break or change habits and behavior).

So, look for recent and pronounced modifications in the times they come home/leave the house (and whether the changed times ‘repeat’ weekly), increased usage of the phone or computer for no obvious/innocent reason, and other differences in the way your partner acts and behaves.

You know your partner’s old habits and ways of living better than anyone, so draw from that knowledge to compare how they might have changed them and to decide if the changes are to be taken as possible indications of betrayal.

3. Miscellaneous indicators of infidelity

Lastly, there’s the group of infidelity indicators that don’t fit in any other box or under any other title. They’re the things you notice, question and cannot innocently explain away.

They’re the things you spot but almost choose to forget because you’re so unsure of what they may or may not mean and whether, ultimately, they are true signs that your partner is cheating on you with someone else. Here are just a couple of miscellaneous indications of infidelity:

Your partner no longer seems to get angry with you when in the past they always seemed to be picking a fight or getting worked up over any tiny issue. Cheaters often ‘let their partners off’ because they want as little confrontation (which could lead to a discovery on your part) as possible.
She or he frequently shifts the focus onto you. Cheaters often asks their partners more questions about how their day went, how they’re feeling, etc, again, to shift the attention away from them and their guilt.

Remember, when you suspect your partner may be cheating, always take the smaller steps, by looking for the kinds of subtle signs listed above, before taking the biggest step of all: confronting them. Doing so will give you the very best chance of a happy, or at least a more manageable, final outcome.

How to Tell If Someone’s Lying Just By Looking At Their Hands…

By simoncruise

It’s a fact: other people’s lies make our lives more difficult. They distort and twist the truth, con us into believing things never happened, or took place when they shouldn’t have.

There are literally thousands and thousands of ways people’s untruths and falsehoods taint and make living our daily lives more of an effort than it really should be.

So what can we do about it?

Putting a Stop to the Lies

How can we put a stop to lies the second we hear them and reveal the real truth, the actual facts, the exact situation?

The answer is natural lie detection – techniques, strategies and knowledge that give a person the rare and invaluable ability to separate the real from the fake and always know what to believe and what to question.

So, what does it consist of? Well, natural lie detection uses no machines, test papers, no video or audio recordings. It is, as the name suggests, a science based on human perception and skill.

The Three Main Components

It has 3 main components. They are the interpretation and analysis of: body language, psychology, and verbal communication. By having a deep and expert knowledge of all three, you can become capable of spotting 99 out of 100 lies, whether they’re spoken over the phone, in person or even over the internet or via text message.

Although learning these special techniques isn’t difficult when you have the time and proper reading material, it does require more space to explain than this short article allows. However, that doesn’t mean we can’t go over one way many liars give themselves away.

This collection of principles falls under the body language category of natural lie detection and focuses solely on how a dishonest person uses, or avoids using, their hands when they’re being deceitful.

Hand-Related Signals

There are 3 main hand-related signals of deceptiveness.

Signal #1: Hand Gesture Frequency

People use their hands to visually illustrate and emphasize their statements. It’s a way of painting an abstract picture in the air to better help the person or people they’re talking to understand the concepts being covered. When someone lies, however, their mind works differently to how it normally operates. Their thought process is dominated by the act of being dishonest convincingly and they therefore tend to change how they use their hands.

The first change you should look for is in how often they gesticulate with their hands while talking. The majority of people, when they lie, lessen the amount of movements they make with their hands because they subconsciously want to restrict the volume of information being given to the person they’re lying to out of fear of saying too much, either verbally or physically, and getting caught out or questioned.

The More Proficient the Liar, The More Hand Gestures They Use

More proficient liars, or people who have rehearsed or planned a lie before telling it, actually tend to increase the frequency of their hand gestures. They’ll slice the air more with the blade of their hand or point their finger and clench their fists more frequently to illustrate and back-up what they’re saying.

So, in short, look for a marked difference between the amount of hand gesticulations a person uses when in normal, day-to-day, obviously truthful conversation and when you suspect they may be lying to you or have a good reason to twist or otherwise alter the truth.

Signal #2: Hand-To-Face Actions

The second signal you should look out for is an increase in the number of hand-to-face actions a person makes when you think they could be lying. The main reason they touch their faces more often when lying than when telling the truth is because of the internal social pressure they’re feeling, which leaks out in the form of hand-to-face actions.

Look for moments when the person momentarily covers their mouth with their hand or fingers. This is a subconscious attempt to stifle themselves and physically block the lie from leaving their lips. They do this to futilely try to block their falsehood from reaching you and thereby decrease the chance of getting caught and lessen their feeling of guilt.

However, many people are on some level aware of how mouth covers may be interpreted (as a sign that they’re lying) so instead try to camouflage the action by instead lightly touching their nose (which indirectly covers their mouth with their hand).

Another reason many liars touch their noses is because of the increased blood-flow that occurs in its deep tissues, which creates an almost imperceptible tingle that, although not consciously felt and reacted to, causes the liar to unwittingly touch their nose for a moment.

So, always keep an eye out for increased hand-to-face actions, especially those that cover a person’s mouth in some way or another.

Signal #3: The Hand Shrug

When people don’t know the answer to something or want to convey the messages: “I’m not sure,” or “I don’t care,” they often lift and quickly drop their shoulders in a shrugging motion. A variation of shoulder shrugging is the hand shrug: a quick lifting and dropping of one or both upturned hands.

What It Means

Like shrugging with the shoulders, it’s a way of expressing a type of diminished responsibility in regards to an issue or topic, and that’s why liars tend to overuse the hand shrug while being dishonest.

Instead of using it only to accompany words that express a feeling of uncertainty or ambivalence, the way people do when being honest, liars use the hand shrug alongside verbal statements that don’t relate to “not knowing” or “not caring.” They do this subconsciously to distance themselves from the lie they’re telling.

Look for these 3 signs of potential dishonesty whenever you suspect someone might be lying and you’ll be a step closer to becoming a true master of deceit detection – a human lie detector.

8 Ways You May be Betraying Your Lover

By scottstephenpetullo

Infidelity comes in many different forms besides having a sexual relationship with someone other than your lover, assuming you’ve agreed to a monogamous relationship with that person.

We’re often asked how romantic betrayal relates to spiritual tenets such as karma and personal destiny. In two words, a lot. Our long-term empirical research firmly indicates that everything you do and say will return to you, and usually not in the same lifetime.

The Big Picture

When looking at the big picture in relation to your love life, it’s important to realize that key circumstances and events, “good” and “bad,” happen because that’s the way your soul (not your personality) planned them before birth so you can learn your lessons and grow spiritually.

However, you do have free will to make the most of every situation. You can also limit your future life karma by treating others as you want to be treated now. Below we list five ways you may be betraying your lover, possibly even without realizing you’re doing so.

1. Emotional Cheating

You have an emotionally intimate relationship with someone other than your spouse. You’re not sleeping with this other person, but still you have an intimate connection that you explore and nurture. If this sort of relationship isn’t acceptable with your spouse, then you are betraying them.

2. Fantasizing Outside the Relationship

You’re regularly fantasizing about someone else, even while in bed with your partner. If you and your partner have an agreement that it’s okay to do so, then fine, but beyond that, it’s a form of betrayal.

3. Disregarding Personal Health

You stop maintaining your health, take up unhealthy habits that cause your looks to deteriorate and, or otherwise are not making the most of your appearance and looking your best for your partner.

4. Decreasing Sexual Frequency

You limit the amount of sex between you and your significant other. Worse, you start to offer sex to your partner only under certain conditions, perhaps in exchange for something such as giving you more of his or her disposable income.

5. Cutting Off Your Partner

You cut off your lover emotionally or intellectually, or otherwise limit or sever vital human contact. Sure, relationships go through certain stages where you may change the way you relate, but to intentionally starve him or her of the type of emotional or mental contact you had prior is a form of betrayal.

6. Financial Irresponsibility

You are not financially responsible, spend more than you both make or have, and risk his or her good credit standing. Telling your lover he or she should be making more money isn’t an excuse for spending too much.

7. Just Pretending

You pretend you are in lust and love but you aren’t. Nobody likes to be with someone who really isn’t into them, but pretends to be.

8. Loving Someone Else

You are in love with someone else and, or you simply don’t love your partner anymore, yet you remain with them and pretend everything is great because you don’t want to hurt their feelings. This is actually selfish because you are keeping them from being with someone more compatible.

In a karmic sense, all of this behavior is ultimately betrayal and just as negative as fooling around behind your lover’s back. In fact, altering your behavior in any way, to your lover’s detriment, after a commitment has been made, is cheating. What to do if you are on the receiving end, you ask? We don’t recommend retaliating with similar behavior, since it will incur negative karma.

But if you’ve done all you can do to help your relationship, and your partner refuses to do their part, it is your right to sever the connection and leave if the betrayal or betrayals push the union beyond repair. You won’t incur any negative karma if you leave as peacefully and fairly as you can.

Should I Give My Cheating Man Another Chance?

By loveandsex

Whether you’re in a brand new relationship or a years old marriage, being cheated on is devastating. The idea of losing a relationship and the person you love can be even more devastating.

Should you give your cheating partner another chance or does it end here?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

I’ve had the feeling my bf was cheating on me. I’ve caught him in multiple lies about were he was, why it was taking him hours to get home from work, where his money was going… In the end through checking his voicemail and email I found out that he was cheating. I have even gone so far as to show him the emails and tell him about the voicemails. He still insists that it never happened. I am willing to give him one more chance if and only if he comes clean and is completely honest with me. Am I foolish to think that our relationship can be saved?

–Marie, MA

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JGVvt4xcseE[/youtube]

Cheating And Apologizing

Everyone makes mistakes, its human nature. It might have happened because your partner was a little too drunk or it might have been a flat out mistake. A person who cheats and it was obviously a mistake may try to hide it, because they’re afraid of what might happen if they’re honest.

When confronted about the cheating, however, this type of person will usually own up to the mistake and apologize for it. In these cases, it can be easier to forgive and forget and give your partner another chance.

Cheating And Lying

On the other side of the coin, there’s the type of person who will cheat, continually even, and deny or lie about it even when confronted with evidence that they’ve been cheating. Even worse is when this person continues to cheat even after they’ve been confronted about it and denied it!

This type of cheater is definitely more difficult to forgive and in some cases, it’s better to move on and find a new relationship. If your partner isn’t willing to own up to their mistakes and promise to be honest and move past the cheating, there’s really no way you can forgive them.

How can you forgive someone who isn’t sorry or who won’t even stop cheating? This is something you really have to think about on your own and figure out what you can live with. This type of cheater is generally the type that is considered “once a cheater, always a cheater.”

Giving A Cheater Another Chance

For a relationship to be successful, you need to have a level of trust, understanding and confidence in each other. You need to be able to trust your partner and have confidence that they love you and won’t cheat on you. Regardless of how they cheated or with whom they cheated, if you can once again build your relationship on a foundation of trust and honesty, your relationship may stand a chance.

This is essential though. If you try to rebuild your relationship on mistrust, lies and dishonesty, the only way your relationship will be headed is in the dumps. You can try to prolong the inevitable, but if your partner continues to lie to you, continues to cheat or in any way isn’t open and honest with you, your relationship isn’t going to be worthwhile.

You will eventually get tired of lies and mistrust and move on, but knowing ahead of time whether you can really save your relationship can save you a great deal of time and heartache in the long run.

Whether or not to give your cheating partner another chance is not a decision to make lightly. It’s something you really need to sit down and think about before making your choice. Try to talk to your partner and find out what their feelings are towards the situation as well.

Does your partner want forgiveness or do they seem to not care? A lot of your decisions will come from how your partner reacts when you approach them about the cheating.