romance – Page 2

The Secret to Lasting Love – Better Than Flowers And Chocolate

After you’ve been together for a while and the initial euphoria wears off, it’s easy to keep finding faults and to focus on the problems and bumps and forget the wonderful things that made you fall in love in the first place. Here’s the best way to keep the love and romance alive in your relationship, no flowers or chocolate required!

Gratitude Journal

When things get rough in your relationship, it’s important to remember what made you first fall in love with your partner. Chances are, the reasons you love your partner are still the reasons you love your partner but day to day stresses have just gotten in the way. It’s easy to focus on little annoyances when things aren’t going your way and this can often put a lot of strain on the relationship. Instead of going over and over why you’re mad at your partner or what they’re doing that really irks you, try focusing on what you love about your partner. Start a gratitude journal. Every day, write down five things that you love about your partner, or that made you fall in love with them in the beginning. Do this for thirty days and you’ll find that all those little annoyances aren’t such a big deal anymore and its easier to remember why your partner is important to you.

Create A LoveBook

A LoveBook is a great option for putting your gratitude journal into something you can give as a great gift and keep for years to come. Sign up for a free account online and start making your LoveBook right away. Pick between a hard or soft cover and choose your cover art. Then, pick from pre-made pages of things you love about your partner or create your very own page. Each page has an illustration on it to help bring the book to life. Once you’re finished putting it all together, order your LoveBook and have it sent to your home. Now you have something to look back on when you’re feeling frustrated in your relationship or give as a perfect romantic gift for birthdays, anniversaries, Valentine’s Day or just because.

LoveBook Gift Ideas

A LoveBook is a great gift for your husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend or partner. This is originally what the LoveBook was designed for, and you simply can’t get any more personal or original with your gift. Forget the bland “flowers-and-chocolate-or-dinner-reservations” gifts and get your partner something really special instead. LoveBooks also make great gifts for parents and grandparents to let them know how thankful you are and how much you appreciate them in your life. Make a LoveBook for your child on their birthday or on any day to let them know all the reasons you think they’re a stellar kid and why you’re proud of them. If you use your imagination, you can give a LoveBook to just about anyone and let them know why they’re important to you and why they’re a big part of your life! Of course, giving a LoveBook to your partner is super special, and it’s so easy you can make one every year to let them know how your love for them continues to grow and grow.

Save Your Marriage – Revive Romance and Passion with this Simple Trick

By melody

For the past 25 years I’ve had married couples come in to see me who have lost connection with each other and are contemplating divorce. Some are very committed to the idea of marriage and are traumatized by the idea, but they feel so unhappy they don’t have a clue how to revitalize what was once a passionate connection.

Sometimes these couples haven’t had sex in years, perhaps decades. But they stay together “for the kids” or because they “love” each other but they have no passion for each other any more. They also don’t feel emotionally connected and often feel lonely and sad.

Here’s what happened: they quit treating each other as friends. They stopped talking about important things because they were afraid of each other’s reactions. Most of the time, they blame their partner for the lack of connection and don’t recognize how their own choices led to a distant, passionless marriage.

Now, understand, I’m not saying you are “to blame”. What I am saying is that you have a choice about how to move forward, whether you are newly in a relationship or your marriage has gone south for years. And, you can’t “blame” your partner; this was a mutually acquired distance that took both of you to create. The good news is that only one of you has to begin to change gears for things to move out of neutral.

Why Does This Happen To A Marriage?

When we first get married or commit to someone, we see this person as our savior. We see them as the person who will rescue us from loneliness, sexlessness, and emotional isolation. Maybe we even see them as the person who will rescue us from our financial burdens. Our ideas of romance are like those of Edward and Bella in the Twilight series. We think that Edward will sweep us off our feet and make us feel like a princess, or Bella will love us no matter how many horrible things we have done. We will never fight, or have disagreements, we will always support each other and clean up after each other without having to discuss anything or challenge each other.

Now I know, your logically thinking “No, I didn’t expect that, I know people have conflict”. Yes, I know you “know” that to be true but the little kid inside each of us secretly longs for someone to be like our mother (or the mother we should have had) who was unconditionally loving and expected nothing from us. I am of course, talking about our unconscious desire for regression into infancy. We all have that pull, and it is what we emotionally crave from our spouse.

And anything that indicates we will not get what the little kid in us wants feels like a violation of our contract with our partner. We pout, we stomp our feet, or we dance around and try to please or we hold our tongue so as to not threaten loss of what we hoped we could have.

The bottom line is that we stop seeing the other person as our friend, and we see them as the person who is denying us the one thing that we most need. Because of this, we go into a self protective mode and stop treating each other with the kindness and respect that we treat our friends.

Take the Risk

Step back from your self, from your marriage, and take a really hard look at the way YOU act toward your partner. Start talking to them like someone you respect and want to get to know better. Trust me, there is more to your partner than you know.

So what if it upsets your spouse for you to discuss money, sex, housework (or whoever the topic)? In order to develop intimacy we have to be willing to let the other person have whatever feelings they have, even if they cry, storm around, or yell. Short of physical or verbal abuse, expression of emotion is needed between spouses. Learning to express your needs requires that you learn to deal with your partners unhappy feelings. No matter who you are, you are going to have thoughts, feelings and desires different from those of your spouse, and sometimes, they will cause conflict.

Chose to Be Emotionally Available

Being emotionally available means being able to tolerate you own feelings, as well as those of your partner. Being a full partner in a marriage means being willing to listen empathetically to your partners feelings without judging them or attempting to curtail them. That said, I know it’s not an easy thing to do. Our survival brain yells at us that we are risking being abandoned, divorced, or maybe even hurt and the truth is; we are, it is risky. But in reality it is no riskier than pretending those feelings aren’t there. When we ignore the real feelings that exist in our self or in our partner, we risk distance, emotional divorce, infidelity, and long-suffering loneliness.

So take the risk, feel the fear, and do it anyway. In the long run, you, and your spouse will fare better. Marriage or no marriage, you will have more honestly, intimacy, and understanding between you.

How To Write Sultry Valentine’s Day Poems (And Get Her In Your Bed)

By loveandsex

Valentine’s Day poems don’t have to be sweet all the time! While a poem full of romance is perfect for the 14th, sometimes that’s just not where you want to go with it. If you want to write something for your lover’s gift, but you also want to have some great sex, here’s how you can make it so hot, you’ll get laid (and she’ll still think it’s romantic!)

Write What You Mean And Mean What You Write

Don’t write something just to write it. Don’t do it because you think you should, or because you think love poems have to be a certain way. Start with your feelings. Write what you mean. If you write it, mean it. Don’t inject fake emotions into the poem because you think they should be there or because you think it sounds better if you do.

Your girl will easily be able to tell if you’re just giving her lines, so writing a super fancy love poem with words she knows you don’t fully understand (and using language that you would never use in a hundred years) isn’t going to get you very far. In fact, you’ll put a lot more effort into it than you’ll get out.

Here’s a hint: When you stay true to yourself and your feelings, it doesn’t feel like it takes much effort at all and the rewards are great.

Go “Sensual,” Not “Sexual”

This Valentine’s Day, you want to have incredible sex. You also want to try your hand at seducing your lover with poetry. If this is your goal, you don’t want to go with anything “sexual.” Talking about how hot she is, how hard she makes you or how horny you are isn’t going to do much in the way of getting her to go to bed with you. This is not what is going to get her to respond.

Instead, go “sensual.” Talk about her curves, how supple her skin looks in the moonlight and how you love kissing her soft lips. Compare parts of her to things you can find in nature – eyes the precise color of a sparkling river, lips like rose petals, etc. Use words like “wet, hard, delicious, supple, dirty, etc.” but not to describe her. She’ll get the underlying meaning. If you think of something sexual to write, just stop and think of how a woman might right that same thing. Would she say, “Your hot body makes me so hard,” or would she say, “Your sensuous curves set me on fire!” Think about it!

Don’t Be Afraid To “Get Inspired”

Guys look at porn. Women read romance and erotic novels. So if you’re going to try to seduce your lover on Valentine’s Day with poetry, why not go to the source of all women’s desire? Yes, it means you’ll have to read. Girly stuff. But it will be well worth it to understand a sexual situation from a woman’s perspective. Romance and erotic novels are nothing but situations in which a woman’s perfect scenario with someone is acted out word for word, play by play.

Google some short erotic stories – you’ll get to the good stuff a lot sooner than if you try to crack open a Harlequin. Take note of what the main woman in the story is seeing, feeling and thinking. Use this to inspire you to write your own story of sorts. Notice the slow buildup before anything erotic is introduced – this is definitely something you want your own poetry to reflect!

Play On Her Fantasies

Again, this is where either knowing your partner really well or knowing how women think about sexual situations well. Don’t think you’ll be able to write excellent Valentine’s Day poems without doing a little homework first. Think about what your lover likes in bed. Has she expressed to you what her desires or fantasies are? If so, you’re lucky! If you’re not quite sure, just write your poetry based on what you know she likes.

So to sum it all up, you want to be genuine when you write, get an idea of what to write from erotic or romance novels and choose topics that reflect your lover’s hidden desires. Be sensual and put some personality into it and you’re golden! Even if you’re not a brilliant author, your partner will know that you spent time and effort on her this Valentine’s Day. For a woman, that’s the best gift of all!

How To Be A Sensual Lover

By loveandsex

Sex tips can help you perfect your technique, but how do you become a sweet, kind and giving lover? Sex tips aren’t going to tell you THIS!

What Does It Take To Be Great At Lovemaking?

A great lover’s heightened sensuality is his ace. He understands what the senses are for and rouses them with full abandon. He offers stimulus bombardment and makes a woman feel so alive. With him, she experiences excitement, exhilaration, romance, danger, passion, even cluelessness. With the sensual one, sex becomes something else entirely.

The boring dude, his antithesis, couldn’t even stir up emotions and he barely knows how to touch – he thinks sex is a penis and vagina affair. He’s so dull and mundane, being with him is like watching paint peel.

So take your pick – do you want to be sensual or boring? One type of guy gets laid much more than the other.

Can you guess which one?

Mastering Your Senses

But to be a sensual lover, you need to forget about learning “sex tips” and instead, master your senses. Not just during lovemaking, but in daily activities also. What you are in daily living easily translates in the bedroom. You can’t live a hurried and harried existence and expect to be a sensual phenomenon in bed.

Don’t go running around and missing the stream of stimulation life offers you. A high-paced lifestyle may accomplish you a million things, but it makes you default on 10 million others. Speed makes stimulation dissipate rapidly giving the brain no chance to process it. Result? No perception.

Imagine driving your car at 100 miles per hour. Look out the windows. The view moves so fast so you can’t really see much, you’re bound to miss on some important details. You could have missed “the-one-that-got-away,” the woman of your dreams, walking her poodle on the side of the road. So she got away – again.

Now, imagine driving at 20 miles per hour. Notice that things become clearer this time. You see that girl from years ago and scheduled a night out with her. You see the coffee table and bargained successfully for it.

It’s a totally different ballgame; it’s a totally different life! All because you moved slower. No, this is not a motivation to be late for meetings or miss your deadlines. This is a call for AWARENESS – honing your senses and connecting with your surroundings.

Sometimes, this requires some slowing down.

How To Slow Down And Take Stock Of Everything

Go to your kitchen. Open the refrigerator, take out a fruit. (Notice how cold that thing is?) Wash it. Now, close your eyes. Close them shut. Hold the fruit near your snout and give it a whiff. Smell its essence.

Next, with eyes still closed, let your teeth slowly sink into that thing. Have a bite, feel every fiber snap with the force of your mandibles and let nature’s juice cascade into your tingling tongue. Savor every drop. Is it sweet? Sour? Bitter?

How was it?

When your eyes were closed, all visual concerns ceased – you were able to zero-in on smell & taste. Did you notice how these senses became more potent?

That’s the power of focus. When a sense is completely blocked, you experience an instant upgrade on the others. The remaining channels become more lucid and clear.

How To Translate This To Sex

People close eyes when kissing not only to avoid cross-eyes, but for a more intense preoccupation of the liplock. This also explains why sight-impaired people have elevated sense of hearing and touch – it compensates for the lost of sight. That’s why Stevie Wonder has one of the sharpest ears in the music industry.

Train your senses in a similar manner. Block stimulation from one, and focus on another. For example, mute the TV and notice an increased ability to read body language and facial expressions.

Or listen to the TV like a radio and notice the range and tones of people hosting a talk show. Close your eyes and get a whiff of that hot pepperoni pizza. It will make the whole eating experience a thing of beauty.

Once you start doing this on a daily basis, you will start doing this while having sex as well, without even thinking about it. You will automatically close your eyes and breathe in your partner’s scent and taste. You will automatically begin to savor every sensation and you’ll be going slow enough that she’ll be able to savor them too.

In essence, you will BE the sensual lover!

How To Write Valentine’s Day Poems For Your Guy

By romymorgan

Valentine’s Day isn’t all about her, it’s about him too! Surprise him with romantic Valentine’s Day poems (yes, he’ll love it and here’s why!)

Valentine’s Day is a day where you can express how much you love your partner. Men all over the world celebrate it by giving gifts, cooking dinners and sending flowers to their partner’s work. But what about your guy? Despite what you may thing, guys need to be told how much you love them too.

Men love a woman that tells them how much they care about them and February 14th is the perfect time to do so. Writing Valentine’s Day poems for your man will show you how much you love them and make them feel special. If you have never written Valentine’s Day poems before, there are a few things that you should know before you get started!

Do It From The Heart

Valentine’s Day poems are not acceptable unless they are written from the heart. Sincerity is the key. When you pen something that is overly embellished, your guy will know that you’re not being sincere. Think about all of the qualities that you love about him and try to express them in your poem. Talk about your first date or other aspects of your relationship. Try to make it as sincere as possible, but do not under embellish either.

Avoid Cliches

Cliches like “we have a love more vast than the sands of time” can come off as extremely cheesy. Avoid any cliches that you have heard before. Cliches do not sound sincere and can easily be mistaken for laziness. You want your partner to feel appreciated, not like you took a shortcut on his gift. Using metaphors is a great method to writing Valentine’s Day poems, but be careful that you’re not using common cliches with your metaphors. The same rule applies to similes so watch out for these mistakes.

Mention The Little Things

Talk about the little things that you love about him. Whether this is how he brushes your hair out of your eyes, kisses you softly every night before you fall asleep or holds you tight when you’re scared, bring these qualities to your poem. Not only will this get your emotions going, he will feel appreciated. Love is not about the monetary items that your partner buys you, it’s about the little things. Telling him that you love the little things that he does for you will show your dedication to him in it’s most sincere form.

Avoid Rhyming

Valentine’s Day poems do not have to rhyme. Some of the most famous ones do not even have rhyme schemes. Don’t feel pressured to rhyme the words in your poem. Sometimes the rhyming can even take away from the poem. Having one that does not rhyme can come off as less cheesy and more romantic. If you decide to pen one that does rhyme, keep it consistent throughout the poem. Choose a rhyme scheme that you feel comfortable with and take it from there.

Choose Your Words Well

Choose your words carefully. When you’re writing Valentine’s Day poems you don’t want the poem to come off the wrong way. If you don’t know what a word means, look it up. The last thing that you want to do is offend your partner with your gift. Choose words that are romantic and masculine to make him feel like a man. If you are too corny with your poem, you could embarrass him.

Be Funny

Another route to take is to do a funny poem. These come off as fun and do not run the risk of being too cheesy or making him uncomfortable. When you’re coming up with funny Valentine’s Day poems, it’s best to have a rhyme scheme (even though we suggested not to earlier). This shows off your sense of humor while also giving him a gift he will love. If you have a good funny bone in you, consider being humorous and romantic instead of just romantic.

Writing Valentine’s Day poems for your partner can be a rewarding way to show him how much you love him. If you don’t research the words that you’re using with your poem, you might turn him off immediately. The same can happen if you don’t do it from the heart. Valentine’s Day is not all about gifts, but this is a gift that you are constructing from your heart. Because it’s coming from your heart, you should put time and effort into it. Follow these simple guidelines and your gift will be a real hit with your fella!