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Oral Sex: Safety Considerations When Going Down On A Woman

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Oral sex is mostly safer than intercourse when it comes to STD’s, but the risk is still there. Find out how you can make oral sex as safe as possible.

Will She Really Enjoy It If You Use Precautions?

What are the proper precautions when practicing safer cunnilingus and other sexual foreplay involving the vulva? Well, they’re no fun. Safer sexual contact during these activities involves lots of latex and frankly, most women will be completely turned off by the mere suggestion of a dental dam.

Why use one then? If the woman is not going enjoy cunnilingus, why bother?

Well, for starters, if she’s that uptight about it, then don’t bother. Just think of it this way – men wear condoms. Men hate condoms. Why do they wear them? That’s easy – to keep from having children and contracting STD’s. Most men will sacrifice the extra pleasure of intercourse without a condom considering the alternatives. Certainly, a woman should be willing to sacrifice some pleasure for the sake of keeping both parties safe and STD-free. If there are valid risks associated with performing oral sex for a particular partner and she will not oblige to practicing safer sex, again we say: don’t bother.

Tools For Safer Oral Sex

But for those who are interested in practicing safer cunnilingus and other foreplay, there are a slew of tools that can be used at your discretion – you may even have some in your kitchen drawer right now. You may have heard of dental dams – you know, those little latex squares they use at the dentist’s office to isolate a tooth. Those are great for using during oral sex, but adult toy companies have started making what they call “lollyes” or “dental dams” – the same concept, but labeled specifically for oral sex.

If you’re in the heat of the moment and haven’t got anything else on hand, plastic wrap will work just fine (see, we told you it might be in your kitchen drawer). If you haven’t put two and two together yet, the dental dam/lollye/plastic wrap goes in between your partner’s vulva and your tongue. Lubrication is very, very important if you’re using any of these items during cunnilingus. Just imagine a very dry latex condom. Uncomfortable, right?

Plus, having lube on the vulva-side of the latex or plastic will mimic the feeling of a wet tongue more closely. Remember though, oil-based lubricant can cause latex to break down – always use water-based lubricant.

Gloves, Etc.

If you plan on engaging in foreplay of the vulva using your hands, you may want to consider using a latex glove if you’re concerned about the risk of transmitting STD’s. Truthfully, infections such as gonorrhea, Chlamydia and the like generally aren’t going to be transmitted through hand-to-vulva contact. If, however, there are open sores or cuts on the hands, fingers or vulva, you do run the risk of possibly transmitting or contracting an STD.

Unlike with cunnilingus, using a latex glove does not hinder the pleasurable feelings in the least – in fact, when properly lubricated; a gloved finger may feel more heavenly than one with calluses and hangnails. Just keep in mind that a dry latex glove doesn’t feel good – remember to use plenty of water-based lube. Although some of these ideas may seem like no fun, it really is better to be safe than sorry.

A caring partner will happily oblige if you request protection for both her and yourself if you are concerned about sexually transmitted diseases. And if she doesn’t happily oblige? You may want to reconsider sexual relations with this person entirely.

Q&A: First Time Sex – Is A Condom Enough?

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First time sex can be nerve wracking, even if you’re taking precautions. There are plenty of things to worry about when it comes to first time sex, such as pain, sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancy. Safe sex is always important, but is using a condom all you need to do?

Question: My boyfriend and I are planning on having our first time soon, and we both said condoms are a must, I’m very pleased with that, but I’m still afraid it will break or rip or leak and I will become pregnant. So I’m trying to find out what the best brand is. Thickest perhaps? We want a latex condom for sure though. Is there any way to help settle my nerves so I can enjoy our first time?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YtSvAjK2Q8w[/youtube]

Is A Condom Enough?

If you want to practice safer sex, using a condom during intercourse is an absolute must. But is using a condom all you need to do? Planned Parenthood says that each year, 2 out of every 100 women who always use condoms correctly will become pregnant. They go on to say that each year, 15 out of 100 women who use condoms incorrectly will become pregnant. So what does it mean to use a condom correctly? Surprisingly, it takes a lot to put on a condom “correctly,” including washing your hands before, leaving enough space for the semen at the tip and taking it off correctly. Many people fail to do this when they’re passionate and in the heat of the moment. Condoms are a must, but they really aren’t enough – they are, however, a great first layer of defense.

Hormonal Birth Control

Many people choose to use hormonal birth control in addition to using condoms, especially for first time sex. There are many forms of birth control including the popular pill, the ring, the patch, injections and even implants that last for five years! There are lots of options, so be sure to talk with your doctor about the right options for you. Hormonal birth control does not protect against sexually transmitted diseases, so it’s important to continue using condoms if you’re with a partner who has not been tested or if you are not monogamous. Birth control will, however, significantly reduce your risk of an unplanned pregnancy, even more so if you use birth control and condoms together.

Barrier Methods

Barrier methods of birth control are often overlooked, simply because hormonal contraceptives are so popular. Some women can’t use hormonal birth control, so a barrier method is a great choice. You can use a barrier method in addition to condoms if you are unable to use birth control, or you can use a barrier method as yet another layer of defense against unplanned pregnancy. However, keep in mind that condoms are the only thing that help reduce your risk of contracting STD’s. Barrier methods include spermicide (available in gel, foam, suppository or a small, thin film that you can fold and place inside your vagina), as well as cervical caps and diaphragms which are usually available at your doctor’s office but may have to be specially made to fit you.

There Is Always A Small Chance

The only 100% effective form of birth control and STD prevention is abstinence. If you want to be absolutely, positively sure that you won’t get pregnant, consider abstinence. No method of birth control including condoms and barrier methods are 100% effective. Yes, they greatly reduce your risk of STD’s and pregnancy, but even with a double or triple layer defense, there is still a very tiny, very small chance that you could become pregnant or contract an STD.

Don’t assume that you are completely safe and fail to make plans if you should become pregnant. Have the conversation with yourself and your partner about what would happen if you did become pregnant. What would you do? How would you handle it? If you’re not ready to have this conversation in the event that your birth control fails, then you’re definitely not yet ready for first time sex. Dealing with the hard questions up front not only shows maturity, it also makes things easier for you later if something does actually happen – that way, you’re not completely unprepared. Recognizing the risk but taking as many precautions as possible and practicing safe sex is the best thing you can do if you want to make sex safer and reduce the risk of STD’s and unplanned pregnancy as much as you can.

 

Oral Sex: Why YOU Need To Think About Safer Fellatio!

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Oral sex isn’t as risky as intercourse when it comes to STD’s, but there is still plenty of risk involved. There’s even more risk involved if you swallow your partner’s semen. Here’s the reason YOU need to think about safer fellatio!

Safer Oral Sex

This is a question with a simple enough answer – or maybe not. Safer oral sex practices depend on the type of sexually transmitted disease that you’re trying to prevent against. If you’re trying to prevent them all, you might as well just go and get a trash bag to cover your partner’s penis and his entire genital area. This is why it is so, so important to have regular exams and STD testing if you and your partner are not monogamous or if you plan to be monogamous, just one STD test before hooking up.

Condoms Are Essential!

If you’d like to practice safer oral sex and don’t enjoy the trash bag idea, you can still protect yourself from many of the other sexually transmitted diseases by using condoms. Condoms will not protect you against genital herpes or the human papillomavirus, however they are so much safer than unprotected oral sex. If you’re fairly concerned about herpes or genital warts, you can combine a condom with plastic wrap (easily found at your local grocery store) to protect your hands and face from coming into contact with skin in your partner’s genital area.

What Kind Of Condoms To Use

The best condoms for fellatio are either the non-lubricated kind or the kind with flavored, edible lubricants. If you try to perform fellatio on a partner wearing a regular, lubricated condom (especially if it is lubricated with spermicide) you are going to be sorry! If you or your partner have a latex allergy, polyurethane condoms are available and can actually be much more useful during fellatio than regular condoms because they tend to be thinner. However, the flavored condoms (which usually come in their corresponding colors) add a bit of fun to a fellatio session while still protecting you and your partner against sexually transmitted diseases that can be contracted through fellatio.

Think About Gloves Too

Condoms are not the only safer-sex tool that you should have on hand if you’re planning on a great (and safer!) fellatio session. Many guys enjoy hand action in addition to oral when receiving fellatio and to be perfectly honest – if infected semen comes into contact with your hands and you happen to have a small cut or abrasion (such as a paper cut) on your skin, you are at a high risk of contracting a sexually transmitted disease. Latex or polyurethane gloves can be your best friend during a fellatio session! These are also great if you are planning to touch your partner’s anus and all and it even keeps long or untrimmed nails and hangnails from scratching your partner and making him uncomfortable.

Don’t Brush It Under The Rug

Sure, insisting on condoms or even gloves during oral sex might make you feel like you’re “ruining the mood,” and it may even make your partner look at you like you’ve lost your mind. That is, however, better than the nurse at the health clinic looking at you like she’s about to tell you that you have HIV.

Fellatio & STD’s – What You Need To Know

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Fellatio is less risky for STD’s than vaginal or anal sex, but is it completely risk free? Not hardly. Here’s what to watch for when giving a blowjob.

Monogamy Is Safer

It is important to note here that most monogamous couples need not worry too much about the health risks and sexually transmitted diseases that are related to fellatio. If you begin becoming sexually active (whether this includes intercourse or not is irrelevant) it is important that both partners are tested for sexually transmitted diseases. If both partners test negative and remain monogamous, unprotected fellatio can be considered a fairly safe activity. However, sexually transmitted diseases can be contracted through fellatio, so it is important to practice safer fellatio with a condom if you are sexually active with a partner that has not been tested for sexually transmitted diseases and/or is not monogamous. Non-monogamous partners should be tested for sexually transmitted diseases regularly.

Yes, The Risk Is Lower – But It’s Still Not Zero

Generally, the risk of contracting a sexually transmitted disease if you’re receiving fellatio is considered fairly low, however, unprotected fellatio (without a condom) can put the receiving partner at a low risk of Hepatitis B and C as well as HIV. The receiving partner may be at a higher risk of gonorrhea, syphilis, Chlamydia, genital herpes and genital warts and in some cases, pubic lice and scabies.

More Risk To The Giving Partner

The giving partner, however, is much more at risk than the receiving especially if she takes her partner’s ejaculate into her mouth. It is important to become familiar with the various types of sexually transmitted diseases that one can contract by giving or receiving fellatio as well as becoming familiar with the ways to have safer oral sex.

STD’s That Can Be Spread Through Fellatio

  • HIV and Hepatitis C – both of these sexually transmitted diseases are spread through blood to blood contact, although, HIV can also be found in other bodily fluids such as breast milk, vaginal secretions and most importantly, semen. In addition, due to eating, chewing gum, brushing their teeth and the like, many people have small cuts to the inside of their gums and cheeks that would make the perfect reception site for a particularly deadly strain of HIV or Hepatitis C. As for your partner, the chances of him contracting HIV or Hepatitis C from your mouth during fellatio is slim, but remember, if there are any abrasions in your mouth or any abrasions on his penis, that risk increases dramatically. You may not be able to see microscopic cuts or lacerations from brushing your teeth and you may not notice a tiny scrape or something similar on your partner’s penis – but HIV and Hepatitis C will notice! For the safety of both the giving and receiving partner – if you are unsure of the other’s STD status, practice safer oral sex!
  • Hepatitis A and B – these diseases are a little less serious than HIV and Hepatitis C, for the simple fact that both can be prevented with a vaccine and if contracted, can be treated with medication. However, care should still be taken when performing fellatio to avoid contracting these harmful sexually transmitted diseases. Hepatitis B is contracted through the same types of bodily fluids as HIV, such as vaginal fluids, semen, and breast milk. Hepatitis A can only be contracted through oral contact with feces, therefore should always be guarded against very carefully if you plan on coming into contact with your partner’s anus.
  • Genital and Oral Herpes – this is perhaps the most commonly spread sexually transmitted disease through oral to genital contact. That’s because there are two types of herpes – oral herpes and genital herpes. That does not, however, mean that oral herpes can only be spread by mouth to mouth contact and genital herpes can be spread by genital to genital contact. A person with an oral herpes outbreak can transmit the herpes virus from her mouth to her partner’s penis while performing fellatio and similarly, he can transmit genital herpes to her mouth in the same way. Although genital and oral herpes generally cannot be spread while there is no outbreak (that is, there are no pimples or pustules on the skin) that does not mean that this sexually transmitted disease should be taken less seriously if the infected partner does not have a breakout.
  • Genital Warts (Human Papillomavirus) – This particular sexually transmitted disease spreads the same way as genital herpes does and can even appear in the oral area, making it a highly contagious and serious disease when considering performing or receiving fellatio. Again, follow the same safer oral sex guidelines as genital and oral herpes – don’t perform or receive fellatio from a person showing symptoms of genital warts (small, white and cauliflower-like pustules). Bear in mind, however, that a person can carry the human papillomavirus without ever experiencing an outbreak of genital warts and as far as mucous-membrane contact is concerned, this person can still spread the disease.
  • Bacterial Infections (Chlamydia, Gonorrhea and Syphilis) – although it is a fairly well known fact that if caught early enough, bacterial infections such as Chlamydia, gonorrhea and syphilis can be treated and most likely cured with antibiotics, this is no reason to treat these sexually transmitted diseases less seriously than one would treat HIV or Hepatitis C. To be honest, the partner giving fellatio is more at risk for these bacterial sexually transmitted diseases because these diseases usually infect mucous membranes – meaning anywhere soft, dark and wet. Isn’t a mouth soft, dark and wet? Many of these sexually transmitted diseases bear no symptoms (especially Chlamydia) and if left untreated, they can become very serious and even deadly (in the case of syphilis). If you are performing fellatio on a partner who has not recently had an STD test or a non-monogamous partner, it is best to utilize safer oral sex practices.

Penis Extensions – Can They Spice Up Your Sex Life?

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Penis extensions are for guys who can’t please a woman with their penis, right? Wrong! They can actually make great sex with your lover even better. You might think, “Why would a guy want to put a fake one on?” Truth is, they do make it a little more difficult to feel sex with your lover – but wouldn’t that make it ideal for men with premature ejaculation? Also, lots of couples enjoy how different intercourse feels when the male partner is wearing a penis extension – he feels bigger going in and it certainly feels bigger to her. Experimenting with penis extensions can be a lot of fun, even if you have average or larger sized genitals!

What Are Penis Extensions?

Think of penis extensions as dildos that fit over the head of your member. They are generally made of similar material (such as jelly, silicone or realistic skin-like material) and look very realistic. They extend the length of the penis considerably, allowing a shorter man to penetrate further into his partner’s vagina.

Average sized men can also use penis extensions if their partners desire a very deep, intense penetration. Some penis extensions require straps to keep them in place, while others simply slip over the head and stay there due to the soft, stretchy material that hugs the shaft.

Don’t They Reduce Pleasure? Why Would A Guy Want To Wear One?

It is true that penis extensions reduce some of the pleasurable sensations experienced during intercourse. However, many men and couples feel as though the benefits outweigh this. And of course, many men choose to wear a penis extension some of the time – while still having intimate, pleasurable sex with their partners without wearing one.

  • Men who suffer from premature ejaculation may find penis extensions incredibly useful. They reduce the amount of sensation that the nerves in the shaft feel, so he may be able to last longer.
  • Men who have smaller penises or simply just want more than what they already have will find that they can reach farther and stimulate more of their partner’s hot spots than with their own.
  • Many guys enjoy the feeling of being able to penetrate their lovers so deeply. And many women enjoy being penetrated exceptionally deep. This is one of the key reasons that guys with average or larger sized genitals would want a penis extension. It can be totally erotic to go as deep as possible!

During Role Play

Sexual role play is another fun thing you can do with penis extensions. This works well if you and your lover have agreed on monogamy, but want to spice things up and experience something a little different every once in a while. A penis extension will make the male partner feel like he’s a different man to both lovers! Incorporate this into a sexy role play scenario. Use costumes if you like, and definitely up the ante with some dirty talk.

Care & Safety

Care for penis extensions is much like the care of any sex toy. You want to be aware of the material it is made from, because latex can be broken down by using petroleum jelly or oil based lubes, while silicone can be broken down by using other silicone lubes. If you use a water based lube, you’re pretty much safe all around. Most penis extensions can be cleaned with simple soap and water, but if you purchase one made of life-like skin material, you’ll need to dust it with plain cornstarch to keep it soft and supple.

Although a penis extension covers the top of the penis, it does not completely prevent semen from spilling into the vagina. It is not designed for safe sex – so it won’t protect you or your partner from pregnancy or any kind of sexually transmitted diseases. If you are in a monogamous relationship with someone and you are both STD free, a condom may not be necessary for you when wearing a penis extension if you are either using birth control methods or are planning a pregnancy. However, if you wish to practice safe sex, you’ll want to wear a condom underneath the penis extension to be sure you’re protecting against unwanted pregnancies and STD’s.

A penis extension can be a lot of fun to experiment with if you’re looking for something a little different in the bedroom. It’s not a replacement for intimate, natural sex with your lover, but it can definitely add some spice in situations that are lacking it!