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Q&A: Sex Toys For Virgins

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Sex toys aren’t just for advanced users. Virgins who choose not to have sex yet still want satisfaction! Whether you’re a teen looking into exploring your body before choosing to become sexually active, or you’re abstaining from sex but still want to have great orgasms, you definitely want to have a great sex toy in your nightstand! However, a huge dildo probably isn’t the best choice. What are good sex toy choices for virgins or women who are abstaining from intercourse?

Question: I’m a young virgin, and I want an inexpensive sex toy that won’t stretch me out. Any suggestions?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oy2kPlXOSRg[/youtube]

Clitoral Vibrators

First off, if you don’t want to deal with insertion at all, your best option is a vibrator designed specifically for the clitoris. All it does is sit on top of the clitoris and vibrate – no insertion required! This is also the perfect choice if you’re a virgin and don’t want to stretch yourself out or damage your hymen in any way. In fact, many women prefer clitoral vibrators over other styles of sex toys simply because they can provide some of the best orgasms! The clitoris was designed for sexual pleasure – and that’s it! It has no other function at all except to provide pleasure. Many women – even very sexually experienced ones – choose clitoral vibrators again and again simply because it’s one of the easiest and best ways to reach climax!

Small, Slender And Discreet Vibrators

There are many small and slender vibrators out there that are designed for insertion, but they are so slender, they’re not going to stretch you out at all. In fact, many slender vibrators are thinner than a tampon! While you definitely want to stay away from Rabbit style sex toys (those can be quite large and are better suited to advanced sex toy users) and large dildos, small and slender vibrators might just be right up your alley. Most of these types of sex toys are designed to be discreet, and can fit in your purse or may look like a tube of lipstick. These make excellent starter sex toys, especially if you’ve never had sex before and are just starting to experiment with sex toys!

Bullet And Torpedo Style Vibrators

A bullet style vibrator is a must have for every woman, simply because it is so small and versatile. A simple bullet vibe can be placed on the clitoris or in the vagina, and some of them can be inserted into cock rings and used for couples pleasure (when you get there). Torpedo style vibes are also popular – they’re generally just a longer version of the bullet vibe. Jimmy Jane makes excellent torpedo style vibrators – they’re extremely classy and barely even an inch in width. G-spot vibrators are also popular, because they typically have a larger bulb on the top, followed by very slender handle.

Remember That Your Vagina Is Made To Stretch

While you certainly don’t want to purchase any sex toys that make you feel uncomfortable or feel too big for you, keep in mind that your vagina is designed to stretch and return to it’s normal shape. It’s not as though you’re going to put a vibrator in there and your vagina is going to stretch out and never return to it’s normal size. It will! The vagina will even return to it’s normal size and shape after giving birth – and that is definitely stretching. The only thing that won’t return to normal after using an insertable sex toy if you’re a virgin is your hymen – once you break that, it’s done and over with. But also know that the hymen can be broken during a variety of non-sexual activities, such as horseback riding, gymnastics, or even inserting a tampon.

Inexpensive Sex Toys

While there are lots of inexpensive sex toys out there that are great, there are many that aren’t so great. While price is a good thing to keep in mind when shopping for sex toys, you really don’t want to compromise on quality. Make sure whatever toy you choose is manufactured with body safe, phthalate free materials (or slip a condom over it if you’re not sure) and is made by a reputable company. Buying cheap sex toys may make your wallet feel better now, but you won’t be pleased when you open the package and find that it stinks like chemicals or the vibrations are weak. If you can find actual user reviews on the sex toys you’re considering purchasing, read through them! They can really help you decide whether or not a particular toy is right for you.

Should You Have Sex Before Age 18?

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Teen sex is common these days – you see it on television and in movies, you hear about teenage celebrities getting busy and kids at school are trying it too. But is it right for YOU? Should you do it, or should you wait?

Legality

Let’s face it – it’s not legal for people to have sex if they’re under the age of eighteen. You can’t buy porn or sex toys if you’re underage either. While tons of underage boys and girls still do have sex before they’re eighteen and never get caught, it’s important to know the basics of when it is actually legal for you to engage in sexual activity.

That said, if you and your partner are both underage, it becomes less of a criminal issue and more of an issue with your parents. However, if you are underage and your partner is over the age of eighteen, or vice versa, you can get into a LOT more trouble. The older person may be charged criminally if it is ever reported that you are having sex with them, and they will be required to register as a sex offender after any jail time, probation or community service that is issued.

Being registered as a sex offender will haunt them for the rest of their lives and make it difficult for them to buy a home, have a job, have children and visit their children’s schools, and even impact their ability to vote. It’s not something that goes away after a few years – it’s a lifetime of being on a list with pedophiles and rapists. Think twice about having sex you or your partner are underage!

What Are You Waiting For?

If teen sex isn’t something you want to be involved in, think about the “why.” Are you waiting for marriage? Are you waiting until the age of eighteen to do it so you or your partner don’t get into trouble? Whatever your reason for waiting is, it’s a good reason – and it’s important that you fully understand the reason why you’re waiting so you can stay strong and continue to abstain.

If you’re not “waiting” but you just haven’t had sex yet, think about some of the reasons you should wait. Are you in a serious, committed relationship? If not, perhaps you should wait until you’re in love. Think about possibly getting yourself or your partner in legal trouble, or going against your personal beliefs. There are lots of good reasons to abstain and there are many of them that will apply to you and you alone. Perhaps you don’t want to abstain until marriage, but you just want to abstain until you’re older, smarter, more confident and ready. Every reason is a good one!

Considering Consequences

No one likes to think about the consequences of teen sex, but it’s a must if you’re considering losing your virginity. Having sex is an adult activity, and if you feel like you’re adult enough to handle it, then you’re definitely adult enough to think about the possible consequences beforehand. A lot of teenagers are afraid that if they think about the consequences of teen sex before they have it, they might talk themselves out of it. That’s not necessarily a bad thing!

If you’re sure you want to do it and “being talked out of it” isn’t something you feel will happen, considering the consequences will help you effectively plan for anything that might happen as a result of your decision. Think about the possibility of getting an STD – and all the different ways that they can be transmitted – and think about what you can do to reduce your risk as well as what you’ll do in the event that it does happen. Unwanted pregnancy is similar – before you have sex, think about how you can prevent an unwanted pregnancy and how you might deal with one should it actually happen.

Staying Safe

If you’ve thought long and hard and have decided that now is the right time to have sex, take the time to look into all safety options that you have available to you – and there are a LOT! Think about going to your doctor and getting on birth control. If you’re too young to go to the doctor by yourself and can’t tell your parents that you’ve made the decision to have sex and want to get on birth control, you don’t need to be having sex.

Also, think about using condoms and spermicide. Get flavored condoms and dental dams for oral sex. Talk to your doctor about other ways you can practice safe sex. Sex isn’t fun if all you’re worried about is getting pregnant or an STD. It’s also not fun if you’re worried about your partner going to jail.

If you can’t get it on with a clear conscience, try waiting until you can!

Q&A: How To Make Sex Better For Her

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Making first time sex special is a concern for many couples who ready for sex but haven’t taken that big plunge yet. Many guys are worried that their girlfriend won’t find the first time pleasurable, and they’re afraid of sex being uncomfortable for her. Here’s how you can make the first time – or any time – better for her.

Hey, my question is – this will be mine and my girlfriends first time, and I would like to know how to make this very special for her. I’m a little worried it will be too short and I would like to know the best way to keep it going to satisfy her.

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vqlk7JfJGk4[/youtube]

Make Sex About Her

If you want to ensure your partner enjoys sex, make the sex all about her. Focus on her pleasure instead of your own. This is where foreplay can really become handy, because instead of rushing into penetration (which likely will be uncomfortable at the very least if it’s her first time) you can focus on getting her aroused through foreplay.  Start out by helping her to relax with an erotic massage, and make sure you take your time. Don’t rush into anything, even if you are tempted to hurry up and get your own pleasure. Taking the time to pleasure your partner is well worth it, because in the end sex will be more pleasurable for the both of you.

Give Her Oral Sex

Women love oral sex. That’s a fact! Most women, actually, can’t climax through vaginal stimulation alone and require some degree of clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm. Helping your partner reach orgasm through oral sex before the actual act of penetration will help get her aroused and more physically receptive to your penis. This is especially helpful if your partner is having sex for the first time, as it will be more comfortable and pleasurable for her if she’s naturally lubed up. Another benefit of oral sex is that your women actually find it emotionally fulfilling as well. She’s going to love the fact that in that moment, even if it is just for a few minutes, she is the complete and total focus of your efforts. She gets to lie back, relax and enjoy receiving your efforts to please her!

How To Make It Last Longer

Many guys who haven’t had sex before or who haven’t had sex in a long time are worried about reaching climax too quickly once they start having sex with their partners. This is definitely a common concern, because many guys report they reach the brink of orgasm more quickly than they would like. To make sure you don’t climax too soon the first time, try masturbating often before the big event. Masturbation will help relieve pent up sexual tension, so you don’t feel the need to climax right away. This will give you more time to spend with her focusing on her pleasure and ensure that first time sex doesn’t go too quickly. These are actually all great tips that you can use beyond the first time as well, to make each and every time as amazing for her as it is for you.

Q&A: Sexual Virgin – I’m Not Sure I’m Ready

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Losing your virginity is a big step, and it’s one that you have to be emotionally and physically ready for. If you’re being pressured to have sex with someone and you’re a virgin, you may be tempted to lose your virginity just to get it “over with.” Fortunately, you don’t have to take that approach to losing your virginity. If you’re not ready, here’s how to be true to yourself and let your partner know what you’re comfortable with – and what you’re not comfortable with.

Question: Dear Dan and Jenn,I am 14 years old and I have been in a relationship with a guy for 2 years. Recently he said he wanted to have sex and I am not sure if I do, but I am worried if I tell him that I don’t want to lose my virginity to him, he will think I am not into him anymore. What do I do?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qcsDyZS9Zo[/youtube]

Staying True To Yourself

Being honest with yourself and staying true to yourself is the most important thing in this type of situation. If you’re not emotionally ready or physically ready for sex, there is absolutely no reason you should have to do it. Don’t try to convince yourself that having sex with your partner will make your relationship better or that your partner won’t think you like them if you don’t have sex with them. The only thing that matters here is what you’re comfortable with. If you’re not comfortable with having sex, don’t do it! There are no external factors here. It’s only about you and what you do or don’t want to do. If your partner pressures you to have sex when you’re not ready, or doesn’t respect your decision to wait, it’s definitely time to move on so you can be with someone who really loves you and respects your decisions.

Being Emotionally Ready For Sex – And The Consequences

Sex can bring great pleasure, but if you’re not emotionally ready for sex, it can bring a lot of trouble too. If you break up with your boyfriend or girlfriend after losing your virginity to them (especially when you’re very young), it will most likely be more painful for you than if the breakup happened without you and your partner having had sex. You never forget your first time, so before you lose your virginity, make sure you’re having sex for the first time with the person you really want your first time to be with. Sex can also bring other consequences that make the situation more complicated, such as pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Take some time to think it through and consider all the possible outcomes of having sex before you actually do it. You can’t go back after you’ve done it and do it differently or take more time. Once you do it, it can’t be undone, so really think it through first.

Educate Yourself About Sex

You may think you know what you need to know about sex, but you’d really be surprised at what you haven’t learned yet. Take some time to educate yourself about safe sex, condoms, the morning after pill, pregnancy and various types of sexually transmitted diseases and the different ways you can get them or pass them on. Don’t rely on someone else to tell yo what’s up when it comes to sex, and don’t wait until after you’ve had sex for the first time to find these things out. If you do decide to have sex with your partner and have decided you’re emotionally ready for it, make sure you know how to keep yourself safe too.

First Time Sex Tips – How To Lose Your Virginity In Style

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First time sex is field with anticipation (the good kind) and excitement. But I bet you are also tense and apprehensive about losing your virginity. If you’re like most girls, you probably want to be a sex bombshell as early as your first time. Is it possible to be good in bed if you have had zero experience in the past?

To answer that question, yes. You are capable of turning your man on and being great in bed even without prior experience in the erotic arts. How? Here are some tips on how you can lose your virginity in style.

Choose a Fabulous Outfit

Your first time is an event worth celebrating, even if you’re the only one who thinks it’s a big deal. When you’re alone, imagine yourself with the man you love and think of what would make you feel sexy at that moment. Imagine the scene from undressing to going under the covers.

It’s impossible for you to be dressed in your usual clothes one minute and be completely naked the next. The transition from dressed to undressed is a crucial part of sex. You’ll be in your underwear, so you’d better look great.

Go out to the shopping mall and look for the most stunning, sexy lingerie you can find. When you see a lacy pair, ask yourself if you want to lose your virginity in that outfit. If you’re hesitant about splurging money for your first time, just remind yourself that this is a once in a lifetime experience and you’d rather spend it in lace than in your usual cotton bloomers.

Feel Sexy

There are some things that women do to feel sexy. Some girls wear their hair a certain way. Some love putting on sheer lip gloss (the ultra-wet variety), and some use dark mascara and eyeliner to emphasize their eyes. Some spend time in the spa or the beauty parlor with girlfriends to moisturize their skin and feel refreshed.

Whatever will make you feel sexy, do it. The more sexy you feel, the more you will lose the awkwardness of knowing it’s your first, while it may be his twentieth time in the bedroom with a girl. At the very least, knowing that you look your best will help you feel more comfortable about baring your whole body in front of a guy.

Connect With Your Man Romantically

Sex with love involved feels a lot better than “just sex”. If you’re feeling so much distance in your relationship, don’t have sex. Do it when the right time comes, and usually, this means you need to be more than a bit in love with the guy before you give up your virginity.

Romance will get you in the right mood. Have something prepared to make him feel more romantic towards you. Put on some music, light some scented candles and go for whispered conversation rather than a normal one. Make sure you feed your man dessert with your hands so that you can transition from the dining room to the bedroom easily.