Cheating shouldn’t happen in a relationship, but it does. What are some of the motives behind infidelity?
What She Said:
- Alienation of affection. If my partner cut me off physically and emotionally, I’d start thinking about looking elsewhere.
- Unhealthy/dangerous habits. If my partner seriously got into drugs and was resisting all help, it would ultimately be a deal-breaker.
- If he cheated on me first, I just might “have to” retaliate!
- Meeting someone with whom I had crazy, undeniable chemistry.
- Midlife crisis!
Honestly, I had trouble coming up with five reasons why I would cheat. It’s not something I believe I would do – though each situation is unique, so no judgment if this is something you’ve chosen.
Cheating happens – there are a myriad of reasons why, as we’ve seen above. For myself, my choice would be to end my current relationship before embarking on something new – as much out of respect for my partner as for myself. Think about it: Would you want to be cheated on? Most likely the answer is “no” – so don’t put your partner in a situation you wouldn’t want to be in yourself, even if the love has faded.
Cheating is usually a sign that something is wrong with the relationship. Hello, obvious! Instead of heaping more drama on the problem (even if it feels good at the time), why not stop and attempt to fix what’s wrong? Your next lover should be willing to wait in the wings while you work on wrapping up your previous entanglement. A clean slate – what’s sexier than that?
What He Said:
- Chris Rock rule of LTRs: He said, “Show me the hottest girl on the planet, and I’ll show you a guy who’s tired of having sex with her.” So you’re partner is great, but you just need some “strange ass.” Not better, or worse, just unfamiliar.
- You met your celebrity crush, and they are “good to go.” I don’t care how faithful a woman is, if she meets Brad Pitt or that dude from Twilight and he wants her, he’s going to have her. Plain and simple.
- Your partner ain’t handling their business any more. To quote the wise philosopher, Shaft “it’s my duty to please that booty.” If they are not meeting this requirement, you’re probably going to look for someone who will and you probably won’t feel too bad about it.
- You think you can get away with it. No, you KNOW you can get away with it. You’re in Vegas, or you’re away on business, on vacation, whatever. You know you will never come into contact with this person again, and even if they did, they can’t pin anything on you. They don’t know your cell number, name, etc. They can’t trace you. This sex act is like bigfoot: everyone knows it probably exists, but no credible evidence existing that can prove it.
- Cause you’re human. Monogamy is not natural. It’s not unrealistic, but it’s not how we were designed. You were designed to screw around and still have someone waiting for you at home. You feel entitled to do as nature intended you to.