Sex ed is a hot topic these days, with teens making pacts to get pregnant and STD’s on the rise. Kids obviously need sex ed – but are they getting it? Who is responsible for teaching kids about sex, and when and how should it be done? Are schools responsible for sex ed? Are books or the Internet responsible, or how about movies, music and TV? No – you, as a parent, are solely responsible for your child’s sexual education. So when should you talk to your kids about sex?
What is the right age to tell your kids about sex? 8? 10? 15? 18? Watch this video to hear what we think about talking to your kids about sex. Visit our YouTube Page to comment and share what you believe is the right age. We also want to hear about your funny ‘situations’ – what’s the most awkward question your kids have asked you about sex? When did they ask it? How did they ask it? How did you react to the question?
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p-ze4BMCmIw[/youtube]
Why We Don’t Want To Talk To Our Kids About Sex
We don’t want to talk to our kids about sex because it makes us uncomfortable. Maybe our parents didn’t talk to us about sex, or we’re embarassed about sex. Heck, most of us can’t even talk to our partners about sex, let alone talk to our kids! But we’re adults – we’re supposed to have the answers. That’s what parenthood is all about. If you don’t know the answers, go find them and live up to the responsibility of being a parent. Maybe it makes you uncomfortable to talk to your child about sex, but how uncomfortable are you going to be when your twelve year old daughter comes home pregnant? Or your teenage son has caught a nasty case of Chlamydia or worse – HIV? That’s a pretty uncomfortable situation and you will then, of course, have to talk to them about sex and why they’re pregnant or infected with a sexually transmitted disease. Why wait until it is too late?
The Right Time Is Now
Okay, we don’t mean “now” as in right this second, especially if your kid is still in diapers. We mean “now” as in talking to your kids about sex when they ask about it. If they don’t ask you about it, it means they’re getting their information from somewhere else, because they will ask. So if they ask you about sex, take the opportunity to answer their questions in an age appropriate manner and be grateful they’re not asking their teenage friends or worse, relying on movies and television to show them how it’s done.
There are three keys that you need to know when taking it upon yourself to discuss sex with your child – first, wait until they ask, but let them know beforehand that it’s okay to ask and make them feel comfortable and safe when asking about sex. Second, answer their questions in an age appropriate way. If your child is eight and asking about sex, you can explain to them simply that it is how children are made. Third, answer your child’s question and only your child’s question. Just because they asked a question about sex doesn’t mean you have to launch into an entire birds-and-the-bees lecture. Often, children will be satsified that their question was answered and go on about their business. They’ll ask more and want to know more along the way – so let them lead.
Stop Making Up Fairytales
You’ve known for a long time that children aren’t delivered by the stork, and that hospitals don’t deliver babies as a package. You’ve known how babies are born, did it yourself even, and have known for quite some time how sex really works. So why make up a story to tell to your children for the time being, only to have to tell them it was a lie later? Don’t tell your kids that babies come from the stork, or any other silly explanation about sex so you can escape the sex talk until a later date. It’s the 20th century people. Grow up!
Lead By Example
You want your kids to grow up and have loving, healthy relationships in which they can have smart, safe sex right? You want them to never have to deal with a sexually transmitted disease or infection, and you want them to have a baby when they are ready. You want them to love and be loved by their partner for who they are, right? So show them what a loving, healthy relationship is.