As men, we are put under a lot of pressure in terms of how we perform as lovers. The media ensure’s this by battering us with statistics on the huge percentages of women that find it difficult to achieve orgasms.
In addition to that, men also have to measure up against porn and main stream movie stars that always seem to effortlessly give their lovers mind blowing orgasms.
Lastly, to complicate this stressed out situation even more, you are also obliged to give your partner multiple orgasms, g-spot orgasms, a-spot orgasms, clitoral orgasms and blended orgasms.
Techniques Don’t Always Work
Though there are many great guides that teach us powerful techniques in cunnilingus, fingering and intercourse, many men are rudely surprised that these techniques don’t always work out like they are supposed to.
This stresses them out even more, and soon the whole episode turns into a nightmare.
Okay, before you give up on the cause of becoming a masterful lover, take a deep breath, relax, and clear your mind. You are about to learn that being a great lover is not just about technique.
Yes, technique does play an important part in helping your partner achieve powerful orgasms, but only if it is applied with the right approach and mindset.
So, what is the Right Approach and Mindset?
Stop putting so much pressure on yourself in the bedroom. Have fun. After all, who ever wanted something as enjoyable as sex to turn into a chore, or worse yet, a science project?
You are not the only one that gets affected with the stress that is induced by this type of pressure. Your partner will notice how stressed you are, and ultimately, it will affect her overall performance in bed as well.
The last thing you want is for your lover to be worried that she might let you down by not reaching an orgasm. She will feel obliged to do anything she can in order to make you happy, even if it means having to lie by faking an orgasm. Ultimately, you will learn nothing, and she will gain nothing.
Approach your love making sessions with a sense of humor. Learn to laugh at yourself and the situation if things don’t go as planned. This will keep the environment between you and your lover relaxed and fun. Most importantly, it will help to keep the doors of communication wide open.
Communicate Openly
Once you are able to communicate openly and in a relaxed manner with your partner, everything will start to make sense.
Having the right approach and mindset will also make the task of learning new techniques in cunnilingus, fingering and intercourse easier. You will have a better understanding of how to apply these techniques because of the relaxed manner in which you and your partner are able to communicate.
You will realize that every woman will have different wants and needs when it comes to sex. You will also realize that it takes time to truly learn your lover. Most importantly, you will realize that there really is no hurry, because both of you are having fun.