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Twenty-Eight Hours – What Real Love Is All About

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Have you ever spent time with somebody with whom you look forward to spending every minute? You know, in life it’s so interesting how we date and date and date and date even more – all in an effort to find that someone we look forward to hanging out with and with whom we want to spend every minute.

Have you ever spent twenty-eight hours with somebody and it felt like one minute? Twenty-eight hours in which the conversation never ceased to stop? Twenty-eight hours in which the excitement kept building and where the connection kept getting stronger as each minute passed?

The Best Gift

Life is a gift. It’s time all of you started accepting the gift of life, because when you do what will happen is that you will actually start to meet people who are going to blow you away. When you’re open and you’re being honest, that is when you’re going to find someone who is also open and honest and then life is just going to seem to mesh.

You will be on the same page with this person about everything you think and feel. It’s amazing when you spend twenty-eight hours with somebody, and when they leave all you want to do is start another twenty-eight hours with them all over again. You don’t want that person to leave. You just want them to stay.

Of course we all have responsibilities in our lives. We all need to work. We all have things we need to do. We need to make money. We need to see our friends. We need to see our family. When someone leaves you after spending twenty-eight hours together and all you can think about is getting to spend twenty-nine (or even thirty-six) hours with them the next time you see them, however, you are in the midst of something amazing.

It’s about building. It’s about desire. It’s about experiencing someone so much that when they leave, you think about how amazing your time together was and look forward to more. That is what chemistry is all about.

The Chemistry Of Love

Chemistry is about connecting with somebody on every level, and having a very peaceful feeling as you connect with them. It’s is knowing that whatever you say is safe. It is knowing that whatever you’re feeling, they are on the same page with you.

Every word that is said and every moment that is exchanged is building a memory. It’s building things the two of you can talk about in the future. It is the foundation of a relationship.

The first few months you are hanging with someone is building the foundation for what you hope will be an amazing relationship for a long time. So for those of you who are dating someone new, enjoy every moment and every memory because those memories and moments are precious.

There will be a time when you will no longer see that person for twenty-eight hours and will see them all the time. You’ll be so entwined in each other’s lives, and you’ll get there naturally. You’ll get there because each twenty-eight hour period is building the desire to spend more time with each other, to get to know each other better, and to experience more and more of each other.

A Real Connection

Connecting with another soul on a deep level like this is amazing and is the best feeling you could ever have, because it’s a connection with no thought process that is 100% natural. That feeling is something that is really going to last and which will really build into more intense feelings.

I think the greatest thing you can have in life is being so content with yourself and so happy, that you are able to truly think about someone else and how you feel about them. I must admit that it’s addicting, and it’s an addiction that everyone needs to feel.

What are your thoughts on this? Are you dating someone about whom you feel this way? If you are dating someone and you don’t have this feeling about them, then you need to move on because this feeling is one that we all need to experience.

There is no other feeling you should experience with someone, because if you’re not feeling this way it means that you’re not connecting with that person on enough of a deep and soulful level. It’s all right if you discover you’re not with someone for whom you feel this way, because you can feel confident that if you move on that there is someone out there waiting for you with whom you will experience this feeling.

If you believe that this type of connection with someone is possible, it will show up. When it does, you need to embrace it because that person could be the love of your life. You’ve got to embrace every little moment of it, because the more you do the better it becomes.

Celebrate Your Love Every Day

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I had something interesting come up while I was just talking to a client. Actually, he’s a future client and a really good guy. His name is Tony, and I really want to dedicate this blog to him.

I’m dedicating this blog to Tony because I think we’re at the same point in our lives. Even though we are not particularly close in age (he’s 39 years old and I’m 46 years old), I believe he and I are at the same point in our lives when it comes to the kind of connection we want to have with women.

Tony and I had a discussion about how we want more than to “just connect” with women, because we’ve already had that with women. We also want more than to just have sex with women, because we’ve already done that with women. It’s about looking for something more than these things.

Connecting With Your Partner

It’s about connecting with someone on an emotional level so deep that you’re able to really let go of everything you ever wanted to be, to feel and to experience. Life should be all about doing that.

Not only that, but being in love is something that you need to celebrate every day. You need to celebrate being in love.

You need every single day to tell the person you love that you love them. You need every single day to share your thoughts, your feelings, and your emotions with the person you love. If you don’t, then you’re not celebrating your love.

When it comes down to intimacy, you have to really forget about everything you’ve ever done in the past. You need to forget about everything your body has learned, and then totally succumb and give yourself to somebody else.

Learn new things. Feel new things. Experience new things. By doing that, you are going to be able to achieve levels of intimacy that you’ve always craved and desired.

Getting Out Of That “Programmed” Way Of Thinking

A lot of people in life are very programmed. Sexually, for instance, if you ask a man or woman what they like they will tell you … but what they are telling you is really what they have liked up to that point. Where they are with you at that moment is not just what’s happened in the past.

Being with you is something that’s totally new and different. So you need to take old information into consideration while also moving forward learning new things, because in life celebrating your love is really all about experiencing and sharing new things every day with someone.

You want to celebrate that love by not always expecting things to be the same, and by being open to whatever the other person brings to the table. This pertains to all areas of your relationship.

One of the greatest ways to do this with your lover is to try something new or do something different with them every week. So, for example, let’s say that there is something that is part of your sexual routine every night (maybe it’s the position, that you always give oral sex, or that they always perform oral sex on you).

In that situation, one day a week you instead could spend time trying other things. You could spend time just touching each other in different ways, teasing each other in different ways, learning to do things in different ways or exploring each other in different ways.

Exchanging Roles Can Keep It Exciting

Outside of the sexual context, maybe you’ve taken on certain roles in the relationship that you could exchange. If your partner has been the person who always calls first, for instance, then try reaching out and being that other person by texting them first thing in the morning.

The bottom line is that you really need to do things that are going to celebrate your love every single day in new and exciting ways. It took so long to find this person and to realize what this person was going to be in your life. Why, then, would you do anything except celebrate that love every single day?

Space Invaders – When Your Ex Wants Back In Your Life

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This blog is an open letter to all of you space invaders out there.

You know who you are … or do you?

No, I’m not talking to those of you with an affinity for handling joysticks and playing early 80’s video games with poor graphics and creatures making funny “gobbling” noises as they ate things. This open letter has nothing to do with video games.

I’m also not talking rodents or anything else that invades your living space. Hell, I’m not even talking about clutter on your desk.

The space invaders I’m talking about here are ex boyfriends and ex girlfriends (we’ll just collectively call them “ex’s” here). This open letter is directed to all of you ex’s out there who are space invaders out there torturing your ex’s.

Now I know all you space invading ex’s know who you are, and this open letter is directed to you. So listen up and pay attention!

Weaseling Their Way In

It’s amazing. Ex’s always seem to find their way back into your life to drop their shit all over you at the very moment when you’re most happy with someone else. It’s like they have this beacon or special radar which alerts them that it is the perfect time to try to get you back at the very moment you are in this most happy place.

They will have an epiphany wherein they decide they are a new person and that they need to convince you to give your relationship with the “new them” a second chance. In their mind they will think “Wait! My ex is with someone else. How could they possibly be with someone else? I realize now that if we get back together, everything will be different because I’ve changed. They need to give our relationship another try with the new me!”

Here’s the thing that is really so crazy about these thoughts. Your ex is your ex for a reason.

They’re an ex because you already learned the lesson that they did not satisfy you in ways you needed to be satisfied. They are an ex because your heart was not touched by them in ways your heart needed to be touched. Your ex is an ex because they weren’t able to get into your soul and get deep into your core like you needed.

These are the reasons your ex is an ex. The same issues are still there. People don’t change, at least not in these ways. They really don’t.

Ex’s don’t go on some miracle trip or special retreat where the light bulb suddenly lights up over their head and they realize all of a sudden everything in the relationship will be different. The core of each person is still the same.

When an ex all of a sudden decides things will be different and invades your space when you are at your most happy place with someone else, the ex is doing it because in reality they are not happy. Deep down they still have feelings for you, but those feelings are all about their own issues and not about yours.

What To Do About A Space Invading Ex

An ex’s space invading is all about their issues. The only result for you when an ex invades the sacred space you’ve set up with a new person, is that stress will be brought into your life and your current relationship for no reason at all.

So at the first sign of an ex invading your space you need to be totally upfront and honest with your ex about everything. You are doing no one any favors when you “protect an ex’s feelings” by not being totally upfront with them.

By you not being totally honest with an ex, you are actually not protecting them from hurt. In fact, you are really causing them more hurt because you are not making it clear to your ex that there will be no second chance together.

It is also important for you to completely let your past with your ex go in order for you to move forward and have the love that you really deserve. You need to also remember that each time an ex invades your space, it hurts the sacred space you are forming with the person with whom you are currently in a relationship.

You need to be as open and honest with your ex about your feelings about them and about your current relationship as you are with the person you’re currently seeing. The reason you with the person you’re currently seeing is because you feel free to be yourself in the purest form.

Now back to all of you ex’s though, because there seem to be no shortage of ex’s who are space invaders no matter what the situation or what you are told. So I implore you to consider all the following things before you engage in any more space invading activities.

Are You A Space Invader?

It is no coincidence that so many ex’s experience the sudden revelation that they need to get their ex to give their relationship another try ONLY after that ex has found someone else with whom they are genuinely happy. You need to see this “epiphany-come-lately” for what it really is: your knee-jerk reaction to the fact that your ex is with someone else.

It is an only slightly more complicated version of the “you want them only now that you can’t have them” syndrome. While you may believe that you all of a sudden see things differently, it is really a function of feeling like you are about to lose your ex unless you say something right now.

Here’s another thing all you space invading ex’s need to remember. You are not an NFL coach gifted with a red flag that you are entitled to throw a certain number of times during a game demanding the refs review a play. You don’t get to just “decide” that your ex needs to give you and your relationship another chance and invade their space to do it.

Your ex’s touchdown (i.e., the new relationship they’ve found that is making them completely happy) stands. You don’t get to review the play. You don’t get to replay the down. Your ex’s new relationship takes place entirely in the last two minutes of the game and only they get to decide if any plays get reviewed.

Further, just because you believe you are a different person or that “things” are different than when you and your ex were together does not mean that the two of you are more compatible now than you were at the time your relationship ended. It is really irrelevant that you have made some miraculous change or turn-around in your own mind, because what ultimate made your relationship not work out with your ex was about something much deeper than that.

What made your relationship not work out the first time was that the two of you at your cores were different people, people whose hearts and souls did not have an ultimate connection. So while you very truly may have made some changes, deep down you are the same person (and so is your ex). You were two people with whom you did not share that ultimate peaceful feeling you have with someone with whom you share a true soul connection.

Ex’s also seem to inevitably show up at absolutely the most inopportune times. So many space invading ex’s seem to operate under the delusion that they are starring in their own romantic comedy movie.

You know the basic plot line: Boy had girl. Boy loses girl (becoming the “Ex”). Ex doesn’t think twice about girl he lost until girl finds someone else. Ex has “the epiphany” moment that he loves girl and needs to get her back (thus becoming a space invading ex). Space Invading Ex discovers that girl’s new boy is not the good guy that girl believes him to be and that HE is the right man for her. Space Invading Ex sets up large scheme to crash girl’s wedding/relationship and declare his true love to girl. Space Invading Ex gets girl back in entertaining romantic wedding-crashing scene.

Ahh – the tears fly, women frantically search for tissues in their purse. It all seems so romantic! This is great entertainment and is very fun to watch in your local movie theater … but is not a good model to follow in real life.

Life Is Not Always Like It Is In The Movies

Think about what this typical movie plot line involves, and what you have to assume to make it the great romantic story that is shown. First, notice that each and every one of these films rests on the major premise that the Space Invading Ex IS the right man for the girl and that the girl’s current guy is in reality NOT such a great guy.

As we’ve discussed, and as all you space invading ex’s know is true, that is not what is going on in your situation. Your ex is in a relationship with someone who is making them truly happy. You are not Patrick Demsey or Hugh Grant, so you need to stop trying to play the lead in this kind of movie plot with your ex!

Another flaw in these movie plots is that they paint the Space Invading Ex as the “hero” doing his ex a favor by exposing the rotten current boyfriend and having the Ex declare his undying love to her. Think about what you are really doing by being the space invading ex.

When you are a space invading ex into a relationship where your ex is genuinely happy, your invasion into that space is not romantic – it is selfish. Really, that’s what it is in its true sense.

Think about it. When you invade your ex’s space, you are bringing stress not only to your ex but to their relationship. Stated simply, you are bringing unhappiness into your ex’s happy space. The only person who is served by this space invasion is YOU.

Also, consider how you would feel if you were in a relationship with someone and that person’s ex continued to invade your relationship space. How do you think it feels to know that your significant other has been on the phone throughout the day with their ex. Let me tell you how it feels. It makes you feel disconnected with your significant other when someone is invading your relationship space. You can feel it happening. Then when you get emails from your significant other telling you how emotionally drained they feel because their ex keeps calling, it causes you to feel emotionally drained yourself. You become emotionally drained because you start wondering what your significant other’s ex said, and what your significant other thinks and feels about what the ex said.

After connecting with your significant other at an emotional and spiritual level deeper than than you have with anyone in your life, to be in the dark about what was said by an ex is a terrible feeling. You want to be there for them and to help them through this, but you also don’t want to be in the dark yourself. Also, this space invasion causes your ex’s energy to be directed totally away from their currently happy relationship, and into a place where they shouldn’t have to explain themselves.

What If You Want To Be “Just Friends?”

Many space invading ex’s will invade an ex’s happy relationship space under the guise of “wanting to become friends.” This is another very selfish act dressed up as an altruistic one. You can’t be friends with all of your ex’s. It all comes down to whether you and your ex were friends in the first place. If you were, then you would not be invading their relationship space in this way. You would already be a part of their life.

You trying to create this sudden friendship with your ex when it wasn’t there before is again nothing more than a selfish act, because a true friend would not want to cause their friend all this stress and pain. A true friend would see that their ex had moved on and has given their heart to someone else, and would not want to do something to directly disrupt that.

Finally, a bit of advice to all you space invading ex’s. Did it ever occur to you that the reason why you all of a sudden feel the urgent need to get your ex back is that you see them feeling the kind of peace, connection and happiness with someone that you wish you had in your own life?

Instead of invading your ex’s happy relationship space and causing damage to the happiness they are feeling, why not instead take your ex’s happiness as the inspiration for you to go out there and find the same kind of happiness for yourself. This is the perfect time to work on yourself so you can find the same kind of true soul connection that your ex has found.

So, to all of you space invading ex’s, I hope this open letter has opened your eyes to what kind of impact your space invading is really having on your ex and their relationship. If you are someone who still has feelings for an ex who has moved on and found a truly happy relationship with someone else, then it’s time you let them move on and be happy.

It’s time that the only space invading you do from here on out is with a joystick and on a vintage arcade game. Stop pining over an ex who is not the right person for you … and stop torturing that ex you claim to love so much!

Start working on yourself so you can cultivate a wonderful relationship for you with someone with whom you share a true and deep heart and soul connection. Maybe once you find them, the four of you can meet up at an arcade for a friendly game of Space Invaders…

Great Relationships Can Get You Lost In Time

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Have you ever met someone whom, when you’re with them, time just seems to disappear? You are talking to them for what feels like five minutes and all of a sudden you realize it’s actually been five hours. Do you ever get lost in somebody so much that you feed off of each other’s energy? Then as you’re feeding off each other’s energy, you just want to learn more and more about that person.

Really Getting To Know Someone

You not only want to know what they’re all about, you want to know everything about them. You want to know what they were like as a kid, what they’re afraid of, what they feel, what their favorite things are, their favorite foods, their favorite bands and their favorite vacation spots. Every time you learn something about them, you want to learn more. You want to know what they like to do, because the more you talk to them the more you get lost in this incredible world you’re in when you’re talking to them. Have you every met somebody with whom you can sit across a table at a restaurant for three hours without even one moment of silence? I’m not really even talking, though, about moments of silence. I’m talking about how you feed off each other’s energy. It’s the way you laugh, the way you smile and the way you talk. It’s how every time one of you tells a story that the other will have a story having to do with the same subject, and you find you connect in so many different ways. Every time you get to learn more about them, their energy keeps going into you. You feel more of their energy, get to know more of their energy and you crave more of their energy. You start to crave that connection you have with them.

Getting Lost In Time

You just get lost in time, and time doesn’t matter. You could be absolutely exhausted at the end of a long day when you speak with them, then all of a sudden a five minute conversation turns into a three hour conversation because you feed off of each other’s energy. It’s like a high. You get this incredible feeling when you talk to that person. You get lost in time. Really, what is “lost in time?” Lost in time is just amazing chemistry with somebody. The reason we all spend so much time hoping and desiring to find someone is so we can have the feeling of being “lost in time.” There’s nothing better than feeling lost in time with somebody, because time doesn’t really matter. If you think about it, there’s no such thing as time. What matters is the feelings and emotions you experience in every given situation. So the next time you meet somebody and you get lost in a little world with them, enjoy it! That is what magic is all about . . . connecting with another person, feeding off of everything they say and wanting to learn every little thing about them. This is what you experience when you get lost in time with someone.

Is Something Magical Happening?

You know what else is magical about getting lost in time? It’s the moment you realize something magical is happening. You know it. You can feel it. Your gut and your intuition tell you. Then you savor every moment. It’s like every phone conversation is just amazing. Every time you hang out, it’s amazing. The feeling of getting to know somebody with whom you truly connect and share intense chemistry is incredible. I know personally that I savor every moment, because when you meet somebody with whom you get lost in time when you hang with them then you know something special and magical is happening. You need to really just embrace it and realize these “lost in time” moments are something that will put a smile on your face for a long time. My brother and his wife are a great example of this. If you would ask my brother what the most magical feeling was when he met his wife, he would say it was the first year they spent together because that’s when they built the foundation for a lifetime of love. He remembers every conversation, the first cuddle and every kiss, because being able to experience magic with somebody is a gift. That magic is something that all of us are craving, and that we all desire. The problem some of us have is that we are scared to death of it. We’re scared to death of letting go, so we can actually have this. The amazing thing about getting lost in time with someone is knowing they’re on the same page with you. It takes two strong people to let down all the walls and enjoy the moment. There is nothing more powerful than getting lost in time. I know, because I’m experiencing it and I’m enjoying every second of whatever we call time.

What Is Great Sex?

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What is it about sex (besides that it’s fun and amazing) that makes it great? I mean, what is great sex to you?

All of us have different versions of great sex, each with different emotions that are conveyed during sex. Some people like dirty talk. Some people like romantic talk.

Connecting With Your Partner

I’ve got to tell you that to me, though, great sex is when you connect with somebody on all levels – emotionally, mentally and physically. Great sex is also when you feel so at ease with each other’s minds, bodies, and souls that you are able to explore each other totally and everything feels great. Really great sex involves both the anticipation of what’s happening in the moment and what’s going to happen next.

What is so interesting to me about the concept of great sex, is that in my lifetime I want to be able to continuously get to new levels with people. I don’t want the same sex forever. I don’t want the same type of relationships forever.

As I go through the cycles of life and the cycles of relationships, I get to know myself better and better over time. What that means is that I am going to be able to give more of myself when the right person comes into my life.

When it comes down to sex, I don’t want to experience the same thing over and over again. I want to feel things I’ve never felt before, and I want to experience a connection that’s deeper, more erotic and more passionate that I’ve ever had previously.

I don’t want the same, because nothing in life should ever be the same. Life should be about getting to new levels, getting deeper with you and getting deeper with your partner.

What Do You Like During Sex?

Some people say they like to kiss during sex. Have you ever kissed somebody during sex, though, where your mouths are so hungry for each other that as you kiss you feel like your whole body is connected from head to toe?

I’m talking about the kind of kiss that is so deep, so passionate and so hungry, that as you’re moving together the kiss is a truly bonding thing. It’s like your souls are so hungry to taste one another, that you just can’t control yourselves.

What is great sex for you? I know for me, it’s everything I’ve just been listing. I know what I want. What I want is the most incredible connection I can possibly feel.

Have you ever had sex with someone and after only the first few times, you can’t believe it’s only been a few times because you feel (in a really good way) like you’ve been having sex with them forever? You feel like you’ve been having sex with them forever because you immediately started learning each other’s bodies and really letting go, and you’re so comfortable with them that you feel like you’ve been connected with their soul and their body forever. At the same time you also know that there are so many other places you want to go with them.

Truly Great Sex

Truly great sex (the kind I’m describing) is something I don’t think happens that often. I think you can have a great and sexually satisfying experience with a lot of people, but I think it’s much more rare to have great sex – the kind where you souls are talking to each other – with someone.

So to me, truly great sex is where your souls are not only connecting, but you know deep down in your heart and soul that you are with a person with whom you can experience things that are more passionate, more erotic and more sensual than with anyone else you’ve ever been with before them. It is almost like you have saved a piece of yourself for this person.

It is like you waited to give that last bit of yourself until you found that someone who just blows you away on an unprecedented soulful and passionate level. The truth is that I think all of us should hold back just a little piece of ourselves until we find that person who has all the keys to unlock all of our secrets.

This kind of great sex is what I strive to have. As a matter of fact, I’m having it now.

What are you having in your life right now? This is what your journey to meet the opposite sex is really all about – this is why you’re learning how to flirt with members of the opposite sex.

You are doing it so you can float on a magic carpet ride. Have you ever moved somebody where every time you move, you feel their soul and their body moving with you in such a rhythm that you feel like you are floating while still 100% connected with that person?

Let’s open up the dialog today and talk about this. Let’s stay on topic, and let’s talk about great sex.