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4 Things You Need Before Giving A Handjob

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A handjob seems easy enough to do, not always. If you want to give your guy the handjob of his life, be sure to have these handjob essentials before you start.

There are several things you need to do before getting started on your man’s member. While he doesn’t have to do as much grooming and freshening up for a handjob (think of it as a great way to please your man after he’s mowed the lawn), you may have to put in a little more effort on your part.

1. Groom Your Hands

Make sure your hands are soft and your nails are clipped. Nothing can be more frustrating than for a man to be quite aroused but having his penis get snagged by a hangnail mid-job. Generally, women have soft hands but if you notice any calluses or rough spots, you might want to take care of those first before beginning the massage.

Get some good lotion and let the lanolin soak in so your hands will the soft as an infants. Last but not least, be aware if you have any cuts or open sores on your hand. If you do and aren’t sure if your partner has a sexually transmitted disease (or if you know that he does), be sure to wear latex or vinyl gloves for the job. Gloves are also great if you do have calluses or rough spots on your hands and most guys love them (contrary to popular belief) because it gives the massage a slicker, more uniform feeling.

2. Use Lube!

Get some lube. No, lotion simply won’t do – it is too thick and gloppy! Think twice before using oil if you plan on having intercourse using a condom later (it can break down a condom quickly). Lube isn’t that expensive and works much better for the task at hand (no pun intended) – make sure you get the water based lubricant as well.

Have it ready by the bed (or venue of choice) so that when you begin, you can easily coat your hands and your partner’s penis with the substance. You can put it in a bucket of hot water or even a small crock pot so it stays warm throughout the handjob. You will most likely need to reapply throughout the massage. Slipperier/wetter is better!

There are now all sorts of “fantasy” lubes on the market now. You can get lube that warms, lube that cools, is flavored, is organic (no chemicals) or even desensitizes which is good if your man comes too quickly with your touch.

Note: IF YOU ARE GOING TO USE OIL – one recommendation is to use grape seed oil. It slides well and is all natural. You can pull it out of the cabinet in the kitchen for an impromptu handjob while dinner is simmering. Never use oil if you plan to use a condom later – the oil will degrade the condom and make it more susceptible to tearing or breakage.

3. Get Your Stuff Together

Have other items of interest ready. This goes without saying, really. If you plan on using gloves or condoms for added protection, have those ready to go (it helps to have the condom already unwrapped). If you want to use edible items or other props (such as feathers, etc.) you will want to get those out and set up next to the area in which you will be giving the genital massage.

Less time fumbling around with items that you’re going to use equates to a more enjoyable experience with your partner. Also make sure any toys you might be using are within reach.

4. Get Comfortable

Make your partner comfortable – and you too! This is actually a very important part regarding erotic massage that is often given very little or no thought. First of all, if your partner is not comfortable, his enjoyment will be hindered somewhat – making it more difficult for him to have an orgasm or the fantastic one you are planning to give.

If the woman is uncomfortable, she will tire of massaging her partner’s genitals more quickly and easily than if she were set up well and relaxed. So, unless you are wanting the handjob to be “risky” or “surprising” (like in his office or in the woods), find a comfortable place in which to give your partner the genital massage. You can also add extra comfort by propping either you or your partner (or both!) up on soft pillows.

Be sure to position yourself so that your hands and arms will not become tired easily. The bed is an obvious choice but also consider a sofa (one that is protected or cleans up easily) or an office chair that leans back. Most men do like to lounge back while they are masturbating or receiving handjobs as it is usually a comfortable position and allows for the thrusting of the hips.

How To Get Her To Reveal Her Darkest Sexual Fantasies

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Sexual fantasies are one of the best tools in the pleasure arsenal. If you act out or talk about your partner’s fantasy during intercourse, you’re likely to amp up her arousal dramatically. Her sexual fantasies can also give you ideas about which techniques and positions she may be most open to trying.

Some Sexual Fantasies Should Stay Where They Belong

Remember that some fantasies are not meant to be act out. A client of mine from a few years back had a partner who fantasized about watching him receive oral sex from another woman. This was not a fantasy she wanted to really see, however. Instead, it represented how turned on she became by watching people having sex. Fantasies involving violence or bondage may represent a partner’s desire to take a more dominant or submissive role during sex but may not mean your partner literally wants to be hit or tied up.

It’s A Two Way Street

Conversations about your fantasies should also be a two-way street. If you’re asking her to confide her innermost secrets, then you need to be willing to confess yours as well. Let me give you a word of caution about revealing your fantasies. Most of us have multiple fantasies and some of those fantasies may involve women other than our partners.

If that’s the case for you, keep those fantasies to yourself. Nothing makes a woman feel less desirable than knowing her partner is fantasizing about other women. It may even make her feel like you’re cheating, even though you’re technically not. Fantasy discussions can take place almost anywhere. The bedroom is a good place because sometimes just talking about fantasies can turn one or both of you on. However, you could also have the discussion anywhere you have some privacy. Also, it should be obvious but it’s worth stating anyway that whatever your partner reveals to you should remain confidential.

Keep It A Secret

Don’t go running off to people you know and telling them what your partner fantasizes about. When she finds out, and she will, her trust in you will plummet and you’ll never get her to confide in you again.

Of course, you should also share with her the details of your own fantasy. If she tells you her fantasy first, then follow her lead. The more details she includes in hers the more details you need to include in yours. It wouldn’t seem fair for her to provide an elaborate description of her fantasy only to have you say, “I dream about having sex with you on the hood of a car” or something similar.

If she’s not comfortable talking to you about her fantasy, then you may want to go ahead and tell her yours. Once you’ve confided your secret it may make her feel more secure about telling hers. If not, drop the subject and come back to it after you’ve been together a little longer. The more trust you build between you in the relationship the more likely she is to tell you her secrets.

Female Masturbation – 5 Shower Favorites!

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Female masturbation exists and the tub is one of the ladies’ preferred places because it’s so easy and private. Here are five ways women masturbate in the tub!

With A Detachable/Massage Showerhead

This is perhaps the easiest female masturbation techniques for the bathtub. A detachable showerhead is perfect, because it allows the girl to aim the stream of water wherever she wants it – either on her whole vulva or directly on the clitoris. A massage showerhead is even better, because it features several different pulsating patterns. A detachable massage showerhead is pretty much a water squirting vibrator.

A massage showerhead that doesn’t detach is still a female masturbation fave, because a girl can still lie on the bottom of the tub underneath the water, and let the water pulsate on her vulva. She can angle her body any way she likes to get the sensations she desires.

Under The Bathtub Faucet

This works well for women who either have only a tub or can’t use their showerhead for female masturbation for one reason or another. A woman will scoot her bottom up all the way to the front of the tub, so she can place her vulva directly underneath the running tub faucet. This works better for smaller women or ladies who are more flexible, because the position required to get adequate stimulation to the clitoris can be quite difficult to get into.

With A Waterproof Sex Toy

Having a waterproof sex toy on hand is probably the easiest way to get off in the water. Female masturbation has endless possibilities when you use sex toys to reach orgasm. A waterproof sex toy can be used while standing in the water or submerged in the tub.

A few tips for buying sex toys for the tub:

  • Look for rechargeable ones that don’t require batteries. They are longer lasting and much easier to use.
  • Pay attention to whether it is “waterproof” or “splashproof.” “Splashproof” generally means that bodily fluids and some splashing won’t bother it, but it’s not really suitable for the tub. Don’t assume anything is waterproof just because it looks like it is – make sure the box or toy specs state that it is.
  • Invest in silicone lube. It works much, much better in the water and doesn’t rinse right off like water based lube does. Yeah, you’ll need soap and water to get it all the way off, but it lasts longer in a wet environment. Just make sure any sex toys you’re using with silicone lube aren’t also made out of silicone as this will degrade your toy more quickly.

Good, Old Fashioned Fingering

Some girls are incredibly discreet about their female masturbation habits. For this reason, many of them choose not to use any sex toys that could get them caught. This is also why the bathroom is such a great place for masturbation – you can do so under the ruse of washing up and usually no one will bother you.

Many women will simply use their fingers when masturbating in the bathroom. Fingers are readily available and covering up what you’re doing should someone walk in the bathroom is much easier since you don’t really have anything to hide anywhere.

Electric Toothbrushes, Shampoo Bottles, Etc.

Many ladies get creative when it comes to female masturbation in the bathroom. If they don’t have any sex toys on hand (which many girls don’t because they don’t want to spend the money or are afraid someone will find their stash), they can use a variety of things that are already in the bathroom.

For example, some girls use a spinning toothbrush on their clitoris instead of a vibrator. While a sex toy is much, much easier to use (and better) than a toothbrush, you can’t usually leave your sex toys out on the counter next to everyone else’s toothbrushes without getting caught. Slick shampoo bottles and even bars of soap can be used to slide around the clitoris during a bath.

Investing in a great sex toy to use in the bath is probably your best bet, but if you’re in a pinch, look around – you probably have something you can use. Just steer clear of razors of any kind (ouch!) and make sure you have another toothbrush on hand you can use if you end up getting yours “dirty.” In fact, buying a brand new one from the store so you can distinguish between the two is probably a really good idea.

8 Sex Fantasies That She’s Absolutely Dying To Try

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Every woman has secret sex fantasies that she wants to try, but many girls are too shy or nervous to introduce their sex fantasies to their boyfriends or husbands. Here are eight sex fantasies that almost every woman wants to try at one time or another and how you can gently lead her into playing along with you in the sex fantasies of her dreams!

She Wants To Teach You A Lesson

It’s a good bet that your partner wants to teach you a sexy lesson. The teacher/student fantasy is one that a lot of women (and men) have and it’s an easy one to do. You don’t have to have any special costumes or spend money on anything to get started. Call her “Mrs. ____” and ask her to “teach” you how to give her oral sex or finger her. See if she gives you “detention” for being a bad boy!

She Wants To Do It With Someone She’s Never Met

Sex with a stranger is something every woman fantasizes about at one time or another. While you probably don’t want to see her go out and bang someone she’s never met before, you can play into her fantasy with just a little bit of dirty talk. When she comes home from work and the two of you sit down for dinner, introduce yourself to her and tell her that you’ve been eyeing her from across the room and would love to meet her. If she plays along, lead her to the bathroom for a quick and dirty romp.

She Wants You To Pull Her Hair

In many cultures, women are taught to be submissive to men. In fact, the desire to be submissive to a man stems from generations and generations ago when women had to rely on men for many more things than they do now. Play into your partner’s desire to be dominated by you and tug her hair a little when she gives you a blowjob. If she likes it, make a point to spank her a little when you start getting busy!

She Wants To Tie You Up

A part of her wants to be dominated by you, but the other part of her wants to dominate you. Chances are, she’s fantasized at one point or another about doing bondage with you and tying you up while she has her way with you. Since this is probably something you would love her to do as well, introduce her to it by wearing a blindfold to bed (a silk tie or scarf works well) and handing her a pair of handcuffs or a tie for your hands. This also works well if you do it on her first and then let her do it to you!

She Wants To Have Sex In Public

Most women dream about having sex in public, but they’ve never taken the chance in real life to actually do it. Satisfy her desire for exhibitionism by taking her somewhere you can have sex (check out these amazing sex places) or surprising her next time she’s in the dressing room at the mall.

She Wants To Play With Your Prostate

Sure, she’s given you an amazing orgasm by just giving you a blowjob or a handjob. But she’s probably read about the “male g-spot” or a man’s prostate and how much better an orgasm can be for a guy with a little prostate massage thrown in. She’s most likely fantasized about being the first one to touch you there, or about being the woman that can give you the most amazing orgasms. Let her insert her finger next time she goes down on you and see what happens!

She Wants You To Rim Her

A lot of women fantasize about their partners going down on them, but her idea of great oral sex and your idea of giving great oral sex may be very different. Lots of girls imagine their guys going down on them and putting their tongue everywhere and exploring places that have never been licked or sucked before. Satisfy her craving for amazing oral sex by spreading her legs and letting your tongue go places it has never gone before instead of just licking her clitoris.

She Wants You To Talk Dirty To Her

Almost every woman has fantasized about dirty talk at one time or another. She wants to hear exactly how good it feels when she touches you, licks you or gives you a handjob. She also wants to hear how much you love doing things to her!

9 Turn Ons You Haven’t Tried – But Should!

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Foreplay doesn’t just start in the bedroom. You can use foreplay anytime, whether it’s in the morning before he leaves for work (so he’s thinking about you all day) or just here and there to entice him out of the blue. Here are nine tips you can use anytime that you probably haven’t tried – and they’ll have your man begging for sex!

Follow Him Into The Shower – With A White T-Shirt On

The wet t-shirt is almost every man’s sex fantasy, but surprisingly enough, many women have never thought about throwing on a white t-shirt and stepping into the shower. However, this simple move will have your man hard in seconds and he probably won’t be able to keep his hands off you. Next time your man heads for the shower, give him a few minutes to get started and then surprise him by stepping in the shower with him, while wearing a white t-shirt. Thumbs up for shower sex!

Flash Him Out Of The Blue

Guys like to see nudity anytime and anywhere. Surprise him before he goes to work (or when he comes home, or in the car, or at dinner…you get the picture) by flashing him your breasts or even your butt. Do it quickly when he’s least expecting it, then go on about your business as though nothing happened. He’ll be thinking about it all day, or at least until he can’t stand it anymore and rips your clothes off!

Drink A Beer Before Making Out

Most girls pick something light or fruity when drinking, like a margarita or a cosmopolitan. He probably doesn’t mind, because he’s just looking forward to some hot sex once your inhibitions are down a little after a drink or two. But next time, surprise him and get a beer. Almost every guy appreciates a girl that can enjoy a good beer, especially if she has good taste in beer. Plan on a super hot make out session after you down your beer. The taste and smell it on your breath will be especially naughty.

Get A Pedicure

You probably never thought that indulging yourself in a pedicure could be a turn on for a guy, but it can – especially if your guy has a foot fetish. Even if he doesn’t have a fetish for feet persay, lots of guys still find well manicured feet and sexy shoes attractive. Get your toes done, then splurge on a cute ankle bracelet or toe ring. Walk around the house barefoot, or watch a movie with your guy and prop your feet up on the table or his lap. You might just get another foot rub out of the deal because he won’t be able to keep his hands off them!

Order A Steak At Dinner

Just like a guy appreciates a girl who can chug a beer, he also appreciates a girl who can actually eat. Sure, you’re probably ordering salads at dinner, but next time, order a steak – and don’t order it well done because you’re afraid of bacteria. Sit down in front of your man and cut into a thick, juicy, medium rare steak. Eat it slowly and enjoy it. Let him watch you eat it and offer him a bite. You may have to ask for a to-go box so you can get it on in the car.

Give Him An Impromptu Handjob – While Standing Behind Him

Impromptu foreplay is a huge turn on for a guy, but give him a different view by slipping your hands down his pants while standing behind him to give him a handjob. He won’t be able to see you, but he’ll be able to feel and see your hands when he looks down at his member. Stroke him lightly, teasing him until he can’t take it anymore. Bonus points if you’re both shirtless so he can feel your breasts on his back.

Buy A Bag Of Lollipops

Lollipops aren’t just for kids. Next time you’re at the store, pick up a bag of your favorite suckers and stash them somewhere in the house where your man won’t immediately find them. When you’re hankering for something sweet, break out a lollipop and enjoy it in front of your guy. The trick here is to enjoy it slowly, licking and sucking provocatively while he watches – it will instantly make him think of oral sex. If you can avoid being blatant about it while you’re doing it and convince him that you’re just really enjoying your lollipop, even better.

Rock Fire Engine Red Lipstick

This can work both if you’re donning your dressy work clothes, or if you’re dressing up to go out for dinner – especially if you’re wearing red or black. Next time you’re ready to go, don’t smooth on your traditional nude lipstick. Grab a stick of hot, fire engine red lipstick instead. Play down your eye makeup so you don’t look overdone and so your man will focus on your mouth. Of course, confidence is everything here. Smile big and watch as your man’s eyes never looks away from your mouth.

Sexting

Sexting is an excellent tool to for foreplay, but a lot of women think that guys won’t really get off on it. However, men like dirty talk and sexts just as much as women do – but you might want to be a little more explicit when it’s for a guy. Men aren’t going to enjoy a text that describes “smoldering desire” or “burning lust.” He’ll want to hear about the specifics. Send him a racy text while you’re both at work, telling him that you can’t wait to get home. Don’t be shy – describe what you plan on doing to him and how much you want it. You’ll be all he thinks about until he gets home!