Love & Sex Answers

Today's #1 Love & Sex Resource

You are here: Home / Archives for loveandsex

5 Signs They’re Really Interested In You

By

Picking up flirting signals isn’t always a piece of cake, especially if people are shy or covert about being into you. While some flirting signals are super easy to spot (say, a big kiss on the cheek or a quick smack on the rear end) others are a little harder to see on the radar. Here are some ways you can tell if a girl or guy is actually flirting with you and if they’re interested in you. If you see one or more of these telltale signals, it’s a safe bet that they’re into you. If you aren’t picking up any of them, you’re probably wasting your time.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEq8XVmAnQg[/youtube]

Eye Contact

Eye contact is a biggie when it comes to flirting. If they’re not looking you in the eye, they either have severe, crippling shyness or they’re just not that interested in what they think you have to offer. However, if he or she is looking you in the eyes when you’re talking, it’s a safe bet they’re totally captivated by what you’re saying. Someone that likes you and wants to date you is going to look at you when you speak and they’ll probably still be looking at you long after you’ve stopped talking. Even someone who is a little shy will glance up a few times at your face to gaze into your eyes. There’s a reason, after all, that it is said that the “eyes are the window to the soul!”

Frequent Touching

When someone makes a point to touch you often, they’re most likely flirting with you and want you to ask them out. They might make excuses to touch you by saying that you had a piece of dirt or lint on your shirt (conveniently placed on an area of your body that he or she wants to touch) or by spilling a drink on you and helping you mop it up. How many guys have gotten to feel a girl up because they “accidentally” spilled their wine on a girl’s shirt and help soak it up with a napkin placed in just the right location? If they lay their hand on your knee during a conversation, wipe an eyelash off your cheek or brush against you when they get up to get a drink or go to the bathroom, they’re definitely interested in you.

Focused On You

If someone is super interested in you, all of their attention is going to be on you. He or she is going to be interested in what you’re saying, listening to the jokes you’re making and offering feedback and stories of their own. This is all part of the dating game and lets the person of interest know that they want to hear what you have to say and are curious about who you are as a person. However, if the person you’re talking to is sneaking looks over at the game, conversing with their friends or are occupied by their cell phones, they’re probably not into hanging out with you. If the person you are flirting with seems distracted in any way, politely end the conversation and move on to get to know someone else. You don’t have to waste your time on account of being polite and friendly.

Smiling And Laughing

A person who is flirting and having a good time is going to be smiling and laughing. They’re going to be engaged in the conversation, and may be exhibiting some of the other telltale clues that they’re into you as well. On the other hand, someone who isn’t having fun or doesn’t seem to be hitting it off with you isn’t going to put on a fake happy face – and if they do, you’ll be able to tell right away. There’s a world of difference between a cheesy fake smile and a genuine smile on the face of a gorgeous guy or gal.

If you’re just not sure that the special someone you are thinking about is thinking about you too, just muster up the guts to ask them out on a date. Sure, you might get rejected or even politely turned down, but asking someone out on a great date is the best way to know if someone likes you for sure. It doesn’t have to be something super fancy or perfect – in fact, it can be a casual lunch or coffee date. While you may think that the clues definitely point to “yes,” there’s no way to tell for certain until you get their number and ask them out!

The “Deep Spot” Orgasm Technique

By

An orgasm is pretty much the holy grail of sex for both men and women. While many people have sex without aiming for an orgasm just to “do it,” most of the time, an orgasm is the goal and end result of sexual activity. That said, giving an orgasm is an incredibly personal and intimate thing. Whether you’ve tried and failed to give your partner a climax or have done so in numerous different ways and are looking to spice it up, this sex tip will add something new to your sexual arsenal.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gBTHLkHpMFY[/youtube]

Step One: Go As Far In As Possible

Insert your fingers into your partner’s vagina as far in as possible. The g-spot is located on the top wall of her vagina about 2 inches in, but you’re going to push your fingers in even further than that. Push them in until they won’t go any further and until your fingers are in her vagina as much as possible. While this won’t feel any different to you than the rest of her vaginal canal, you will know when you hit the right area because you’ll meet a lot of resistance and your fingers and hand won’t go in any further. While you can use one finger for a virgin or a woman that is extremely small or tight down there, two fingers or more are best for this intense technique. One finger may not apply enough pressure for an experienced woman.

Step Two: Add Pressure And The “Come Hither” Motion

Once you’ve pushed your fingers in all the way, curl them upwards in a “come hither” motion. This is the same motion you would use if you were aiming to stimulate your lover’s g-spot. Add some firm pressure (this is not the time to tickle lightly) and move your fingers forward and backwards. Pay attention to your partner’s body language and what movements she is responding to. If she pushes against you harder and grinds herself against your hand, it’s a pretty safe bet that she’s enjoying it and wouldn’t mind you to do it a little harder. If you notice that she’s backing away or isn’t making much noise, she may be in discomfort or pain and be afraid to tell you she doesn’t like it. Let your girl’s body language dictate your next moves.

Step Three: Add Oral Sex (Optional)

Once you’ve gotten the fingering down pat, you can stimulate your lover’s clitoris with your tongue and give her oral sex. While this isn’t always necessary to give her the orgasm, it will add to her pleasure and may even give her a blended orgasm! Some women need clitoral stimulation to achieve orgasm at all, so if your partner seems to be grinding her pubic area and clitoris against your hand or starts masturbating herself, you know it’s time to put your tongue into play.

Use Lots Of Lube And Foreplay

Don’t forget to start with a great deal of foreplay and use lots and lots of water based lube. Silicone lube will work fine too, but it is harder to wash off and your lover may not be able to get her vaginal canal completely clean afterwards. Water based lube is inexpensive, easy to use and rinse off and is available just about anywhere including drugstores and grocery or superstores. It’s important to use foreplay to warm her up before you start, because inserting your fingers inside her may be uncomfortable or painful if she’s not adequately aroused. Lube will also help keep things comfortable for both you and your partner, because even if she’s completely turned on and begging for more, she may not produce enough natural lubrication to help things go smoothly.

If It Hurts, Stop!

While this may seem like a no-brainer, you wouldn’t believe how many people continue doing a certain activity even if it hurts or causes extreme discomfort. Sex should be fun and exciting, and certainly shouldn’t hurt or feel bad in any way (unless you dig that sort of thing). Before you begin, let your partner know that it is ok to tell you if it hurts or if she wants you to stop. Tell her that it’s also ok to let you know what feels good and what doesn’t – and what she’d like you to do next. While great sex doesn’t always come naturally and must be learned in a lot of cases, nothing can replace good communication between two partners when it comes to sex.

How To Leave A Message & Get A Return Call

By

You’ve been dating and you’ve got someone’s number. Congratulations! You’re riding the high but you’ve yet to actually call them – what if you get their voicemail? Getting the answering machine make most people lock up, stutter and leave the most awkward messages. What kind of message do you need to leave to get a return call? If you’ve struck out in the past and have left voicemails that don’t get callbacks, here’s how you can leave a message and get a call back – every time!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-9fl6lHtEUM[/youtube]

Speak Slowly And Clearly

When leaving a voicemail, whether you’re phone dating or calling a number that you’ve scored, it’s important to speak slowly and clearly so you can be understood. When people get stuck with the answering machine instead of the person they want to be dating, they tend to get very nervous clam up. They may not speak at all for several minutes, or they may talk so fast that they’ll never be understood. Speak normally, but slowly and clearly enough that the person listening can understand each word that you’re saying. Just don’t talk too slowly, or the person that’s listening may actually think you’re “slow!”

Leave Your Phone Number

You would be surprised at how many people get nervous and forget to leave who they are or their phone number in the message. If you have to, write it down. Sure, you know your own name and phone number but it’s easy to get so nervous that you forget to say it. Also, remember to say where you met them at the beginning of the call and repeat your phone number again at the end of the call. It may unnerve you to think that they may have forgotten who you are or where they met you from, but we all get busy and things slip from time to time. If they don’t remember where they met you, you’re probably not getting a call back. If you leave a long message, the person listening to it may not have the time to rewind it and listen to the phone number again. Saying your number again at the end of the voicemail gives whoever you want to be dating the opportunity to write it down after they’ve had a chance to listen to who you are and where they know you from.

Practice What You’re Going To Say First

It’s easy to get really nervous during different steps in the dating process, especially if you’ve never talked to the object of your affection before. If you’re super nervous, practice what you’re going to say before you actually make the call. You want to sound confident and casual, not scared and stuttering! Even if you’re a pretty chill person, the pressure is totally on after the beep. Your confidence will suddenly drop and you may not remember what you were going to say! Making a few notes about what you’re going to say before you make the call and having them in front of you when you dial will make it easier for you to leave a great message.

Let Them Know You Like Them

How many times have you left a message letting someone know who you are, where you met them and what your phone number is – but have forgotten to let whoever you’re calling know that you really like them and enjoyed meeting them? Lots of people forget how important telling someone you’re into them is, which often leads to getting stuck in the friend zone instead of actually dating them. Don’t be afraid to let someone know that you like them and you’d like to meet them again or schedule a first date with them. Just be honest about how you feel!

Don’t Be Afraid To Call Back

After leaving a voicemail, give it a few days and if you don’t hear from them, call again. There’s no “phone dating rule” that says you can’t call more than once. Lots of things can happen to sabotage your message actually getting through (in its entirety) to the person you’re looking to start dating. They might not have gotten the message if their voicemail was full, or your phone – or theirs – may have cut out before they got to write down your entire number and they’re not sure how to get a hold of you. The message may have accidentally been deleted, or they simply may have listened to it, meant to call you back and just forgot. There’s no shame in calling again to see if the message actually went through. Just don’t end up on the stalker list – calling back more than a few times is a little creepy.

How To Get Your Girlfriend To Masturbate For You

By

So you want her to masturbate, and you want her to masturbate in front of you. Question is, how do you get her to do it? Some women are cool with talking about masturbation, but some women just aren’t comfortable clicking their own mouse, let alone talking about it with their lovers.  Whether your girl does enjoys flying solo or has never tried it before, watching her get her freak on by herself is something that can entice both of you and make your sex life hotter. Here’s how you can convince her to masturbate – and then do it in front of you!

Tell Her You Want To Watch

Very few women want to watch men masturbate – so telling her that you want to watch her do it may sound unbelievable to her at first. She may think it’s a crazy idea, or that you’re trying to manipulate her in some way so that you can scrutinize her. Of course this isn’t true, but getting her to believe that the idea of watching her masturbate for you is a huge turn on is a different story all together. Try some dirty talk in the bedroom next time you and your lover have sex. While you’re touching her clitoris, let her know how much it would turn you on to see her touch it. Start small and work your way up to the big stuff. She may only start out with letting you watch her play with herself a little, but with constant encouragment and enthusiasm on your part, it won’t be very long before she’s giving you a show.

Give Her Some Assistance During Foreplay

While you’re fingering her or giving her oral sex, place your hand over hers and take it along for the ride. Slowly rub her breasts, hips and lower stomach with your hand underneath hers so she can feel what you feel when you’re having sex with her. Look into her eyes and show her how hot it makes you when you see her touch herself. As you move your hand down to her vagina, let her take the lead once you feel she is sufficiently turned on to keep going. Again, you want to do this slowly because if you move too fast, you could freak her out. You want to let her take the lead and go however fast or slow she wants to. You can also join in and touch her breasts, her buttocks or finger her vagina while she touches her clitoris. If she wants to fly completely solo while you watch though, you can masturbate on your own while you watch her do it!

Masturbate With Her

It’s no problem if you get so turned on by watching her play with herself that you have to touch yourself also. This will actually encourage her to do more! Sit in a chair by the bed, watching her masturbate while she watches you. If you or your partner want it to be less of a “spectator sport” and more intimate, try laying next to each other on the bed, facing each other. Ask her if she likes watching you masturbate as much as you like watching her. Remind her over and over that you absolutely love what she’s doing and simply can’t help but play with yourself! If you still have a hard time getting her to really let go and masturbate for you, try touching yourself while you give her cunnilingus. Let her know that you find her vagina extremely sexy. If she believes that you really enjoy licking it, sucking it and looking at it, she won’t be as self concious about revealing all in front of you.

Dirty Talk

The real secret to getting her to touch herself for you is to talk to her the entire time and let her know how much it really turns you on. Don’t be afraid to be vocal about it, whether it’s groaning while giving yourself a handjob while she masturbates or telling her with words exactly what you like to see. If you make it absolutely clear that watching her touch herself is what makes you super hot and horny, she’ll end up being more than willing to do it for you. Try asking her for a tutorial on how she does it herself, or try directing each move that she makes and have her touch herself where you tell her to. Get creative and most of all, remember to have fun with it. If she’s still uncomfortable with the idea of masturbating in front of you, let it go until she’s ready to do it.

Relationship Advice: Are You Spending Too Much Time Together?

By

When you’re in relationship with someone, it can be so easy to want to spend every moment you have with them, particularly in the beginning of the relationship. However, there’s a fine line between what is and isn’t healthy. If you start to notice that you never see your friends anymore, or you’re dropping activities you used to love from your schedule, things may have gone too far.

You may even realize that you’re beginning to grow bored with dating your boyfriend and girlfriend because you’re slipping into a routine. We can’t expect one person to satisfy all of our needs, so we have to have a well-rounded life. You may be surprised to find that pursuing your own interests and friendships can actually make you and your mate that much more intrigued by each other.

How Much Is Too Much?

Perhaps you are feeling smothered by your relationship, or you suspect you’ve lost your sense of self. Think back to the things you did when you were single. Did you have a regular ladies’ or guys’ night? Were you a member of a club or sports team, or taking a class to pursue a hobby? While you may not want to pursue every activity from when you were single, it’s worth adding a few back into your lifestyle. You don’t even have to do something as frequently as you used to. If you and your girlfriends had a weekly movie night, perhaps you can try to attend at least twice a month.

Maybe your monthly camping trip with the boys can now be done three times a year. As long as you’re maintaining at least one other important relationship in your life and taking some time out of your schedule for them, that’s a start. Absence really does make the heart grow fonder. You may find that your girlfriend is that much more excited about spending the following weekend with you upon your return from that camping trip.

Keep Up With Your Own Hobbies And Interests

It is also important to keep up with hobbies and other interests you have, whether you invite your significant other to participate in them with you or keep them an alone-time activity. This isn’t just because you’ll feel happier, but also because it makes you a more interesting person. Your partner loves you for all the things that make you a unique individual, and that includes the fact that you love to read, or cook, or go running every morning.

Maybe you can no longer play video games for an entire Saturday afternoon, but that doesn’t mean you can’t fit in an hour here or there. Plus, this helps encourage your S.O. to develop his or her own interests. While you’re busy baking that cake, your mate can head outside and practice free throws. Now you have that much more to discuss with and learn from each other.

Don’t Shoulder Your Partner With The Responsibility Of Making You Happy

Truthfully, it boils down to this—if you drop all of your friends and hobbies for a relationship, you’re now reliant on your partner for all of your happiness. That’s not fair to either of you, and it can place a strain on your relationship in the long run. You will both feel better if you can learn how to maintain a sense of self-worth. It’s important to have friends there for the times when things aren’t going so great with your boy/girlfriend.

You need a network of support, just as you need to know that you can make yourself happy through hobbies and solo fun. Having two well-rounded people in a relationship will make that relationship that much more compelling. That’s the best way to ensure a long, happy and interesting romance.