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Should You Combine Finances?

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You and your honey have been seeing each other for a while now. Perhaps you’re already living together (in sin, high five!) Things are going great and you have every reason to expect that they will continue to do so for as long as you care to imagine. So let’s talk a little business. To what extent should you two lovebirds combine your finances?

Will Combining Finances Destroy Your Relationship?

If you haven’t thought about it before, maybe it’s time. Sharing expenses can save you some good money. Rent on one pad is cheaper than two. Family cell phone plans save money. Why keep two Netflix accounts? What could possibly go wrong? The view through your fancy, Elton John-style, rose colored glasses might make it seem like the only things you’ll need to make your relationship work are love and lots of vigorous sex. In the real world, however, not many things can match money trouble for sheer, teeth-gnashing, relationship-destroying power.

Some couples will prefer to keep things separate: half-and-half on the rent and utilities; separate groceries and phones; and Dutch on every bar tab. Other couples will be perfectly comfortable pouring all of their bread into a joint checking account and letting fate sort it out. No one way will be right for everyone. Here are several things to consider.

If yours and your honey’s paycheck match dollar-for-dollar, you may expect that each of you will pitch in an equal amount of dough to keep to homestead running. However, if you’re a musician or a public school teacher and your significant other is a biochemist or a crooked lobbyist, it’s likely that one of you is supporting the other in ways that don’t involve money. In that case, it might not make sense to split expenses down the middle. Think about the different ways that you contribute when you’re deciding how to figure this all out.

Who Will Manage The Finances?

Another difference between partners might be their level of financial prowess. If you have a credit score lower than the monthly payment on your 1993 Ford Escort, and your partner’s score is best expressed in scientific notation, proceed with caution. That stellar credit score came from years of diligent responsibility and you don’t want to screw it up. On the other hand, one of you is clearly better at the whole money and bills business. Maybe you should let Mr. or Ms. Responsible handle all of the money stuff.

Two more important things to consider are trust and privacy. If you’re a shopaholic with poor financial self-control, that doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re not relationship material; we all have our little flaws. You just might want to make sure you’re playing Supermarket Sweep with your own money. Also, if you value your privacy when it comes to the purchases you make, you may want to make sure that you have at least a portion of the money you make kept separate from the joint account. After all, if you’re considering marrying your finances, marrying your selves might not be too far behind, and not many things can spoil a three-carat surprise like a joint checking account!

How to Chat Safely Both Online And Off

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Protecting your identity may seem like common sense, but when we start flirting, chatting, and enjoying ourselves a little too much, we can sometimes forget that there are predators (sexual, identity theft, etc) both online and off. Here are some key things to remember next time you start feeling a little too comfy with the person on the other end of the line – whom you’ve never actually met.

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Trust Your Instincts

Your instincts are one of the best ways to tell if someone is for real or not. Your body has ways of letting you know that something isn’t right, and if you start getting that feeling, it’s best to trust your gut. You may know exactly why you’re not feeling comfortable with someone when dating online, but then again, you may not. Someone may seem on the level at first and even second glance, and everything might seem to check out. Logically, there might not be any reason for you to be suspicious. You may only have a “feeling” that something isn’t quite right, but just because you don’t know “for sure” doesn’t mean you need to ignore it. If you feel like something is up, it likely is. Trust yourself. Don’t allow yourself to be uncomfortable with someone simply because you aren’t sure why. In many instances, it’s better to follow your gut.

Guard Your Privacy

It never hurts to be extra cautious and extra safe. Until you really, really get to know this person both online and off, it’s important that you guard all aspects of your privacy. Do any and all talking through a safe source, such as an anonymous phone chatline or an anonymous online dating website. Never give out your email address, your real name, your telephone number, your address or where you work. Instead of worrying about what is safe to share and what isn’t, keep it simple and don’t share anything until you’ve really gotten to know someone and are able to trust them.

Know When To Get Out Of A Freaky Situation

If you suspect you might be talking to someone who isn’t on the level, or have even met them in person, don’t be afraid to get yourself out of a bad situation A.S.A.P. You don’t owe anyone anything and your safety and well being is your top priority when dating and chatting online and over the phone. While there are some very good liars out there, many of them will give you several clues that will let you know that something just isn’t right. For example, be on the watch for angry outbursts and manipulative language or behavior. Do not tolerate disrespectful comments or any type of derogatory behavior towards you. Watch out for inconsistent information such as birthdays, horoscope signs, age, hobbies, likes and dislikes, etc. Many people who lie will tell you one thing at one time and something completely different another time because they’ve completely forgotten what they’ve lied about in the first place. Also, another telltale sign that something is amiss is evasiveness. Someone who is honest and straightforward won’t have any problems answering reasonable questions, but someone who has something to hide will often skirt the questions or provide evasive, vague answers. If you feel that you’re in a situation that is not 100% honest, it’s time to cut all ties and move on.

Your First Time… With A New Vibrator – Sex Toys 101

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If you’re new to using a vibrator, you’re not alone. As society becomes more and more accepting of masturbation, more and more people are starting to explore masturbation for themselves.

But getting your first vibrator and using it for the first time doesn’t have to be confusing. Here are some great tips on what to do when you get your first vibrator.

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6 Smart Rules For Using A Vibrator

1. Never insert any vibrator to the point where it cannot be controlled or removed. You may feel tempted to go a little deeper, but if you end up getting the vibrator lodged too far inside your vagina, you’re going to need assistance having it removed. This can result in a very painful and possibly damaging situation.

2. Always clean your vibrator after every use. Unwashed vibrators are excellent breeding grounds for all kinds of bacteria. Inserting a dirty vibrator in your vagina can easily give you a nasty bacterial infection that would require a doctor’s care to get rid of. Plus, clean, smooth and great smelling toys always feel so much better!

3. To make clean up easier, you can place a condom over the vibrator before use. If you often take your vibrator with you on the go, washing your vibrator with soap and water or toy cleaner may not always be a feasible option for you. Slip a condom over your vibrator before using and when you’re finished, simply take the condom off and throw it away!

4. Use only compatible water based lubes with your sex toy. Some sexual lubricants cause different types of vibrators’ material to break down and degrade. Not fun if you’ve spent a lot of money on the perfect vibrator! A good rule of thumb to remember is that water based lube works well with everything.

5. If it hurts, stop! While that seems simple enough to remember, such is not always the case. Many women compare themselves to women in adult movies, or that’s the only form of sex education they got and as a result they end up hurting themselves. Often, the way women use vibrators and dildos in adult movies is grossly exaggerated. Don’t feel like you have to make it hurt to make it good.

6. Do not use your vibrator on broken or irritated skin. You could possibly get an infection or at best, make your irritated skin feel even more uncomfortable and painful.

Additional Tips

  • Inspect your vibrator upon arrival. Look for tears, holes and other defects in the toy. Plug it in or charge it’s batteries and make sure it turns on and off, and that all the buttons work. If the toy has to be returned for any reason, it’s better that you find out before you use it.
  • Learn how to use it. Take some time just playing with the vibrator to see how it works and what it does. Learn how to work the vibrator first before you take it in the bedroom. Then you can experiment with the best techniques and positions for pleasure.
  • Wash your vibrator before using it for the first time. Manufacturing companies and packing plants aren’t very clean places for your vibrator to have hung out in before you bought it.
  • Use lube. It just feels better. Besides, vibrators aren’t self lubricating.
  • Get comfortable. Using your vibrator is about taking charge of your own pleasure.

May-To-December Romances: Can They Last Over Time?

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Lolita. Harold and Maude. American Pie. Marked age differences in a romance are nothing new to the world of literature and film. However, are they really conducive to modern-day relationships? Can two people of differing generations find a connection that transcends the decades?

Younger Man + Older Woman Or Older Man + Younger Woman?

The first aspect to consider is the genders as they relate to the ages. Would an older man/younger woman combination be more likely to succeed than an older woman/younger man relationship? Not necessarily, but it is more acceptable by society’s standards. Nowadays, a young woman on the arm of her older partner would not cause one to even bat an eyelash. The stigma of an older woman courting a young man is slowly dissipating, but the situation is still likely to draw jokes about her being a “cougar.” Because of that stigma, it is often harder to be taken seriously as a legitimate couple.

Spring-Time Perks

One of the best ways to succeed in a May-to-December romance is to find a way of bridging the gap. For instance, if you are a young woman (or man) with no interest in the wild dating scene, you may be looking for someone to settle down with right away. Meanwhile, an older man (or woman) has focused on his/her career for most of their adult life, and now they are ready to start a family. These people are able to meet halfway to fulfill their common goals or desires.

Cold Weather Drawbacks

The relationships that seem doomed to fail are the ones in which the couple does not have a connection deeper than appearances, money, or other superficial perks. For example, an older man may proudly find himself the target of his friends’ jealousy when he starts dating a hot 18-year-old. However, the disappointments quickly pile up when he realizes what may accompany this particular age: no previous adult relationships, insecurity, partying lifestyle, and little “real world” experience. Also, you may enjoy the vigor of your younger lover. Yet, what happens if you are ready to have a baby or to move to the countryside, but your energetic partner isn’t ready to settle down?

And Over Time?

Moreover, generations have widely varying ideals, values, and goals from the next. One woman, whose parents are 20 years apart in age, shared her experiences. While the age difference didn’t matter when they were in their 30s and 50s, respectively, it certainly made an impact when they hit their 60s and 80s. When she was younger, the mother hadn’t minded her husband’s old-fashioned views about “a woman’s duties,” such as rearing the kids, cooking, and cleaning. Yet as an aging woman, she no longer had the energy to do all the housework. Also, as he grew older, he became less interested in such activities as traveling—even though she was still into traveling the world.

“While a big age difference is irrelevant for a time,” she concluded, “it’s almost guaranteed to cause problems if you’re still together when the older person is actually old. They have a good relationship despite their differences, though. They knew what they were getting into and decided they loved each other enough that they’d deal with it.”

How To Achieve A Spectacular Orgasm

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Focusing on your partner’s pleasure and giving her a fabulous orgasm is a great way to make sure you’re having awesome sex, but what about making your own orgasm even better and even more spectacular? After she’s gotten hers, here are some excellent tips on how to make your orgasm the best you’ve ever had.

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Take just a minute to check out ‘The Sex God Method’: “If You Want to Give Women Screaming Orgasms, This Video May Be The Most Important Video You’ll Ever Watch”

Prolong Ejaculation As Long As You Can

Instead of letting your orgasm come when it comes (no pun intended), try prolonging ejaculation as long as you can. Many men who hold out do so to help give their partners time to have an orgasm, however, this technique will also work to give you a stronger, harder orgasm when you finally ejaculate. Go slow, and don’t rush to have an orgasm. Instead, simply focus on feeling each wave of pleasure pass through you rather than focusing on the end result. When you feel you’re getting close to orgasm, you can stop for awhile, or just go slower. Take this time to give your partner some more pleasure, such as giving her oral sex while you back down from the brink of orgasm for a few minutes. Repeat this process until you just can’t hold it in anymore!

Hold Your Orgasm In

When you feel yourself physically starting to orgasm, squeeze your PC muscles to try to hold it in as long as you can. Your PC muscles are the same muscles that you use to stop the flow of urine. When your orgasm bursts through all of your efforts to hold it at bay, your orgasm will be amazingly powerful and the final release will be mind blowing. If you find this difficult to do, however, you’re not alone. Some men aren’t able to effectively use their PC muscles right away because just like any muscle, they need to be exercised to become strong. Practice doing kegel exercises on your own by squeezing and holding your PC muscles several times a day. These exercises will help you to strengthen your PC muscles so when you use them to hold your orgasm back, you are able to do so effectively.

How An Awesome Orgasm Will Turn HER On Too!

When you have a great orgasm, your partner will feel amazing too. She’ll feel super sexy and awesome for having given you such a mind blowing and intense orgasm and she’ll want to do it again and again. Women truly love giving their partners pleasure and get a great emotional high from it, so when you have a spectacular orgasm, she’ll feel great too. After sex, be sure to tell her how much she turned you on and how amazing it felt to finally explode inside her. She will love hearing how much pleasure she gave you and how wonderful your orgasm was, and it’s a great way for both of you to bask in the afterglow of amazing sex!