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How A Girl Sizes You Up (And How To Work It To Your Advantage)

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For seduction to work, you must understand the way a woman looks at you first. Put your best foot forward and the seduction can begin right away! So let’s talk about “regular” beautiful women for a moment—the ones who aren’t doing stripteases for a living.

Beautiful women, who are constantly being hit on, are naturally going to put up barriers when they get the sense that a guy is sexually interested in them. (This is sometimes referred to as a “bitch shield.”)

What Happens When You Start A Conversation With A Hot Girl

So when a random guy tries to start a conversation with a hot chick, one of two things will happen:

  1. If she is completely uninterested in the guy, she will ignore him or blow him off as soon as possible. (“Nice to meet you, but I need to go find my friends…”)
  2. If she’s having fun talking to the guy, or finds him interesting or attractive in some way, she will begin to screen him. She will use certain questions and behaviors to elicit responses from him. The manner in which he responds will allow her to form a judgment of him: is this a guy she can picture herself having sex with (or dating), or does he lack the qualities that she is screening him for?

(If so, she might continue talking to him out of politeness, and even give her phone number if he requests it, but there’s no way she’s ever going to have sex with him. She’s already made up her mind about that.)

Your goal, then, is to control the conversation so that you don’t give women the chance to start screening you. You want to “turn the tables” so that you are the one screening them.

How To Get To Where YOU Are “Screening” HER

Remember this—because it applies in and out of the strip clubs. The main things a woman “screens” you for are your status and value. If she senses that your status and value are lower than hers, she knows she doesn’t stand to gain anything by being with you. So she won’t be interested.

If she feels that your status and value are higher than hers, she’ll want to keep talking to you—and she’ll begin to feel attraction, if you push the right buttons.

This has nothing to do with how much money you’ve got, or what kind of car you drive. There are much more important ways in which any guy can demonstrate status and value.

For example, if you give a stripper (or any girl, for that matter) the impression that you know other people at the club, and you’re familiar with her profession and how the whole “game” works, you’re conveying a higher status than the typical customer.

If you tease her during the conversation (instead of trying to kiss her ass) and qualify her (which means you say things that indicate you’re not so impressed by her, and want to find out if she measures up to your standards), you’re also showing status.

Give her VALUE

Providing value means she can tell she will gain something, or improve her situation, by hanging out with you. (In a strip club, a guy’s “value” normally means what he’s carrying in his wallet—but you’re going to attract women by different means, and in a more powerful way.)

Bringing value can be as simple as making her laugh and feel relaxed with you. Other ways of providing value include getting her to share her ambitions and goals (strippers always have some other “plan” for their lives), and encouraging her to go after that goal.

You want women to feel that if they spend time with you, you’re going to make their lives fuller and more exciting, and you’re going to help them grow and better themselves. That’s super-valuable stuff.

Am I Leading Him On?

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Dating advice is essential if you want be on the right track with a man. Could you be making him think there’s more between you than there really is?

Nobody likes to be lead on. Usually the man is the one that will lead a girl on, however, this can happen the other way around. Leading a fella on can hurt him and his ego. When a man is lead to believe that the relationship is something that he didn’t expect, he can get angry and you might never hear from him again. If you have been seeing a fella and you’re not too sure if you’re leading him on, there are a few ways that you figure it out. Here are some signs that you’re leading him on.

You Need Something

Some girls are experts in the damsel in distress role. The thing about this is that men love to swoop in and save a girl from any situation. If you need something, it’s okay to call a friend, but helping out a girl makes a man feel like a man. Make sure that he knows you just need help and that you aren’t interested in him.

He’s A Fallback

Some men have instant chemistry with you while others take time to warm up. If you find yourself calling him when you have nothing to do, he might see it as a sign that you’re interested. If you find yourself using him a fallback, you might want to cut it out. Men tend to make excuses for girls that call them every once in a while. They might think that you’re busy and this is the first chance that you’ve had to call them.

You Haven’t Talked About The Relationship

Relationships can rely on signals to progress. However, signals can be very confusing. If you haven’t talked about your relationship, you might be leading him on. When you talk about the relationship, you give it definition. Defining the relationship lays all of your cards out on the table and leaves no room for confusion.

Your Friends Tell You You’re Leading Him On

Sometimes it takes an outside viewpoint and some good dating advice to let you know what you’re doing. If your friends are telling you you’re leading him on, they probably have good reason. Whether it be that they detect something that you don’t or they have inside knowledge that the fella likes you, listen to your friends. In this case, it’s best to have the talk with him and let him know that you’re not interested.

You Pull Away When Things Get Real

Do you make excuses for why you can’t have dinner with him or go out on a real date? If so, you might be leading him on. When a fella offers to take you out to dinner or to a show, more than likely it’s not a friendly invite. He’s interested and he wants you to go with him. If you make up fake excuses on why can’t go with him, you’re obviously not interested. Tell him that you’re not interested to diffuse the situation.

You Only Call Him For Sex

This can actually be an extension of #5. If you’re sleeping with him and he asks you to spend more time with him out of the bedroom, you are definitely leading him on. Sex to a man is one of the most important aspects of a relationship. If the sex is good, he’s probably wondering how he can make the relationship official. Explain to him that you are not looking for anything serious and he might actually be more receptive to a friends with benefits situation.

You’re Too Flirtatious

Flirting is one thing, but if you’re flirting too much, you might be sending the wrong signals. It’s best to keep the flirting to a minimum. Touching a guy’s shoulder or telling him how attractive he is can lead him on quickly. Make sure that you’re not make flirtatious gestures when are around him. He might get the wrong idea and this could cause a rift between the two you.

Leading a guy on can be damaging to any relationship. If you are friends with a fella or you’re sleeping with him, it’s best to make sure that he’s knows what the relationship actually is. When a man likes you, he will bend over backward to do what is needed to make you his girlfriend. Because of this power that women have over men, they tend to take it too far without even realizing it. Take a careful inventory of how you interact with your male friends and listen to the people around you if they say that you could be leading him on.

How To Seduce An Older Woman

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Seduction isn’t always easy, especially if you’re honing in on an experienced cougar. Here’s how you can seduce a lady who’s a bit wiser (in years) than you.

The allure of a more mature woman can be intoxicating to younger men. Older women have more experience, know exactly what they want and they can be a lot of fun. Men in their early to mid 20s love older women because they tend to be more mature and straightforward both in the bedroom and out of it. Women in their early 20s like to play head games and beat around the bush in what they want out of a relationship. Older women take all of the hassle out of dating and are usually established financially and emotionally. If you would like to know how to seduce a mature woman but don’t know how to engage them, there are a few things that you should know beforehand.

Forget Everything You Think You Know About Women

One of the biggest aspects of using seduction on younger girls is using flare. Money, power, job titles all come into play when you are seducing a younger girl. This doesn’t apply to older women. Seducing a mature woman doesn’t require a position at a high paying law firm or a sports car. More than likely, an older girl will be financially secure. In fact, they will probably make more money that you do. This is okay. You just have to learn how to use your other attributes to appeal to them. Forget everything that you think you know about women when you are trying to seduce an older girl. Talk to them as you would a friend or a colleague, but keep sexual tension.

Have Confidence

Older women can be intimidating. This is not a new concept. Many men get hung up on whether or not a mature woman would actually date them instead of the other way around. A woman in her 40’s wants confidence. Attraction is not built through physicality alone. You must be confident and show her what you have to offer other than what is in your pants. Appeal to her emotional side. Challenge her thinking in conversation. All women want a challenge, but to seduce an mature woman you need to take it to the next level. Do everything that you wouldn’t do with a younger girl. Talk about politics, religion or other controversial issues without allowing the conversation to get heated. This shows your confidence and will separate you from the rest of the guys trying to gain her affection.

Be Established

Yes, she’s established, but that doesn’t mean that she’s going to pay your bills. Older women don’t want a leach. They want somebody that is going to hold their own. This doesn’t mean that you need to be a millionaire; it just means that you need to be in a position where you can pick up the bill every once in a while. Show her that you are ambitious and that you know what you want out of life. Younger guys tend to use older women as a crutch. You want to separate yourself from the other guys trying to date her.

Be Mature

Everything about you should present an image of maturity. The way that you dress, the way that you speak, the food that you eat and the way that you handle yourself are all taken into account when trying to seduce. The days of bummy t-shirts and ripped pants should be over. Tuck in your shirt and get a decent pair of dress shoes when taking them out. Maturity is in the details. Ironing your clothes, keeping your car and your home clean are all signs that you are mature. Take pride in yourself and in her. This will show the ultimate amount of maturity.

Be Physical Without Being Creepy

Seducing an older girl is all about comfort. The age difference could make the situation awkward from the beginning. However, if you are getting the vibe from an older woman, be as physical as possible without being creepy. Don’t touch her legs at first. Go for the lower back, shoulders or arms to start out. These are key stepping-stones to get you into the majors. Older women love sex, but they need to feel comfortable first. Don’t mess it up by getting too touchy right off the bat. Build rapport and then you can start getting bold.

An more mature woman is sophisticated and can be a lot of fun. They will challenge you in the way that you see yourself. Presenting yourself as an equal is the best way to seduce a mature woman. Although you may not have the financial means to be an equal with her, an emotional equality will be enough to get you through to the next round.

Best Online Dating Tips Of 2011

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Online dating can be an excellent way to meet new people – so check out our best suggestions of this year and make a goal to meet someone in 2012!

Don’t forget to take a look at some of our all-time favorite online dating articles! The tips and advice here will help you pimp your profile to the max so you get maximum exposure to the people you’re interested in, as well as teach you what to say and what to do when you find someone you really like. You won’t have success in online dating without these great suggestions!

We’ve also spent this year searching for great dating resources to help you up your game and meet more people than ever before. We want you to have the confidence and the know-how to approach someone you’re interested in, ask them out, get a number, wow them with an incredible first date and sweep them off their feet! Although these resources aren’t specifically for online dating, they contain the SECRETS to dating (online or otherwise) that every man should know – that is, if he ever wants to snag a date!

  • Pandora’s Box (THE definitive resource on ALL things dating – after this, you’ll be able to date ANY woman you want!)
  • 300 Creative Dates (great for when you actually take your online romance into the real world – you’ll learn unique, inexpensive dates that will totally capture a woman’s heart! NO OTHER GUY has ever taken her on dates like these before!)

Body Language That Turns Women Off

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Body language is an important tool to use to attract ladies. But are your actions actually sending girls the other way?

Body Language That Women Don’t Like

It has been said that 80% of all communication comes from body language. This is a form of non-verbal communiqué that has the ability to instantly turn women off. When you use the right actions, you send a message to women telling them you are confident and available. When you use the wrong actions, the thought of dating you can go out the window in just a couple of seconds.

If you are not completely aware of your non-verbal communication, you could easily lose her. When you implement the right kind of non-verbal communication, you will be able to instantly show your qualifications as a potential date. Here are some examples of body language that women don’t like.

Eye Contact

Eye contact is essential to showing your confidence. When you make eye contact with a woman, the most natural thing to do is look away. If you instantly look away, the amount of confidence being conveyed goes through the floor. The best way to overcome this is to make contact with the woman and then keep the eye contact until she looks away. This will usually occur within a couple of seconds. When she looks away first, it shows submission.

Here is a guideline:

  • Make eye contact with her.
  • Wait for her to reciprocate.
  • Maintain the eye contact.
  • Wait for her to look away.
  • You look away.

Posture

Posture can be a magnet to women. Do you remember your teachers showing you how to properly sit in a chair during grammar school? Regress back to the 3rd grade and implement this back into your life. Posture is non-verbal communication that can turn women off from a distance. Slouching while sitting or standing does not convey confidence. Posture can convey power. The best way to overcome bad posture is to suck in your stomach a little and hold your head up. Arch your back slightly to pull back your shoulders.

This might feel a little strange at first, but it works. Try to make yourself look as big as possible. Women are not attracted to men who slouch. Just think, how attractive was Al Bundy?

Fidgeting

Fidgeting is definitely something that turns women off. When you fidget you suggest nervousness. Women don’t want a man that is nervous when they are talking to them. This can apply to when you approach her and during the opening conversation. Making really fast movements and playing with your belt or zipper instantly shows that you are submissive to her power. The most frequent signs that a girl is into you involve HER playing with her hair, playing with jewelry or any other nervous tick.

So when you think about it, this role should be reversed. Instead of you making these movements, you should be making her fidget. When you are talking to a woman, have a mental picture of a hypnotist. A hypnotist makes very slow and calculated movements. These are there for a reason. These movements make the person being hypnotized anticipate the movements. This brings mysteriousness to your personality and will convey dominance.

The Tone Of Your Voice

The tone of your voice is technically “language” but it’s also a form of body language that can turn women off. There is a certain tone that must be applied when talking to women. If you have ever taken a public speaking class, you should know that your voice sends a message. This is applicable to talking to women also. Weak and squeaky voice tone is not attractive. There is a breathing exercise that will help you out. Breath in to fill your stomach instead of your lungs. Talk as you breath out to achieve a deeper voice.

Body language is essential to showing that you are a confidence man with a lot to offer both sexually and from a personality standpoint. When you use body language that turns women off, you aren’t getting the message through. When you fully implement the right actions, you could see a rise in the amount of women that respond to you in a positive manner.

Eye contact is your first point of interaction. Once she has submitted to your eye contact, you can approach with confidence. Use the correct posture in your walk when you approach her and she will be instantly open to a conversation. Make slow movements while you are talking to her and watch for the signs of fidgeting. Implement your deeper voice tone and she will be putty in your hands.