Love & Sex Answers

Today's #1 Love & Sex Resource

You are here: Home / Archives for Singles & Dating

How To Plan An Incredible Date

By

Dating involves coming up with new ideas for dates all the time – check out these amazing tips if you really want to add the “WOW” factor to your next date!

Whether there’s a special occasion on the horizon, like your significant other’s birthday, or it’s just your turn to decide on Friday night’s date, you can make plans that will impress your partner. A little effort and forethought can go a long way toward coming up with a fantastic date concept.

How To Plan The Perfect Date

The key to planning the perfect date is to build it around your mate’s interests. In an ideal world, you’ll be able to find points of interest that you both share. Sometimes, however, you’ll find that you need to go with some ideas that won’t be quite as enjoyable to you as they are to your S.O. Either way, by demonstrating that you’ve paid attention to your partner’s interests, you will be sure to impress and please them.

So start mulling over your mate’s favorite activities, and think back to anything they might have mentioned in recent conversations. Is he/she a music fan, a sports fanatic or a film buff? Whether they’re a foodie, a bookworm, or a theater lover, try to find an out-of-the-ordinary event tied to their big interest.

How To Find Great Date Ideas

Check out the internet or the arts and entertainment section of your local newspaper for upcoming events. Then start thinking outside the box. If your boyfriend or girlfriend is an art lover, see if the city nearest you has a gallery crawl night. It’s like an extra-special trip to the museum. If she is in love with boos, take her to a reading by one of their favorite authors at a local bookstore.

If there’s not a particularly fitting event coming up, try finding a learning experience you can enjoy together. If your S.O. is a gourmand, try taking a cooking class or going to a wine or coffee tasting seminar. If you’re both fitness fiends, look for a walk-in yoga or kick boxing class to attend. Learning experiences are the dates that keep on giving, whether you end up signing up for more classes together or practicing your new skills as a team at home.

Great Dates Can Last All Day – Or Night!

Another key to planning the perfect date is going beyond one simple event. Don’t just buy two tickets to a hard to find foreign film playing at the art house theater near you. Make a full night or afternoon of it. Plan a meal before the movie at a nearby restaurant that serves your S.O.’s favorite kind of food. Then, after the film, grab coffee or drinks together at a new bar or café you haven’t gone to before.

Experiencing new places and things together helps give you both unique memories together. Likewise, you can go the opposite route and recreate elements of a favorite date from earlier in your relationship. Demonstrating that you paid such great attention to a previously beloved evening can be very romantic.

Planning A Theme Date

Going so far as to plan a theme for your date can also be very impressive. Say your boyfriend or girlfriend is a big jazz lover, and you get tickets to see a jazz band perform. Try planning a ‘50s beatnik evening, starting at a coffee house before the performance followed by dinner at a French bistro. You don’t have to dress the part or anything, but that extra attention to detail shows your S.O. how much thought you put into your date ideas.

Even a night in can be more fun with a theme. Instead of your normal Friday night of pizza and TV, try surprising your mate with something unexpected. A homemade Moroccan dinner followed by mint tea and Casablanca on DVD can make for a great evening. In the end, if you show that you considered your partner’s unique tastes and took the time to plan something special, you’ll be sure to have an amazing time together.

How To Be A Chick Magnet

By

Flirting tips aren’t going to help you if you can’t attract women to you in the first place. You can approach women easily, but if you’re not attracting them to you, you’re really not going to get very far when you start flirting with them. So what is it that guys who get tons of girls do? Here’s how to get women to flock to YOU!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cq4CKGtkXm4&feature=channel_video_title[/youtube]

Pay Attention To What Your Body Language Says To Girls

When a girl approaches you or you approach her, she’s going to size you up in about five seconds. She’s going to make a judgement about you based on several things, including the way you look, the way you dress and even how you smell. Your body language plays an important part in attracting women, because this is what will make you seem approachable to her or not. Subconsciously, she’s reading your body language to know if it’s okay to go up and talk to you or not.

Make sure that your body language communicates that you’re a strong, confident man, who is also friendly and fun to hang out with. When you’re flirting with a woman, you want to make a lot of strong, masculine gestures and also make sure that you’re not stooping over – if you have poor posture, you’re not going to look confident at all. Make sure your facial expressions convey a happy, confident and fun to be around personality – if you’re scowling the whole time, no girl is going to want to approach you or carry on a conversation with you.

Have Friends That Are Also Confident And Fun To Be Around

Who your friends are and who is in your social circle really says a lot about you, especially to a woman. When choosing friends, know that your friends really show who you are, so you want to make sure that you and your friends have similar ideals. If you’re hanging around a bunch of bullies or jerks, girls are going to think that you’re a bully or a jerk, even if you’re not. Your friends should be just as nice and friendly to others as you are.

Learn To Love Yourself

Women want to be dating confident men – they don’t want to be dating a wuss. So you want to project an air of self confidence and to do that, you must truly learn to love yourself for who you really are. Know that each person is special and unique (including you) and each person has something they can offer other people that no one else can. Each person is an individual and no two people are exactly alike. Learn to love yourself and be confident in what YOU can offer, because it’s special!

How To Break The Ice

You’ve got the first five seconds down, but now you actually have to talk to her! What do you talk to her about? How can you break the ice without choking up?

Start flirting with her. Engage her in conversation. Start by asking her questions. Don’t just ask questions like, “What do you think about the crazy weather we’ve been having lately?” That’s lame. Ask her intellectual questions about her, things around you or things that matter to her. For example, ask her what she is passionate about. No, not what her hobbies are or what sports she plays. Ask her questions that really make her think, like, “What is it that makes you want to wake up every morning?”

Talk About Your Passions

While you definitely want to break the ice by asking her about her passions first, there’s probably going to be an opening at some point for you to talk about what drives you. Be honest with her and let her know what you truly love and what really makes you tick. Hopefully, you and her share some of the same passions or at least ones that are similar so you can start building some common ground, which is essential when you start dating someone.

However, you’re never going to know if you and a girl would really hit it off unless you’re completely honest about your passions and what you love, even though it makes you more vulnerable to rejection. When it comes to dating, women know that a man is risking rejection each time he is flirting with a girl or asks a woman out. You can really make a difference by revealing yourself to a girl, instead of trying to be the guy you think she wants.

Stay Positive

Girls always remember how they feel when they meet a guy. She may not remember exactly what he looks like or exactly what he said, but if he made her feel great, she’s going to remember him and either be waiting for his call or be dialing his digits herself. If a guy makes her feel amazing, she’s definitely going to want to be dating him.

If you make women feel great when they’re around you, they’re going to remember you and want to hang out with you even more. If you’re a downer while they’re around, or if you’re pessimistic or constantly complaining about things, a woman is going to want to run for the hills at the first chance she gets. Even if you’re nervous, focus on flirting with her and making her laugh. Smile, relax and remember to have fun. Show her a good time and make her feel like she’s the only girl in the room. If you do, it’s pretty much guaranteed that you’ll score a date with her.

You’ve Got To Do More Than Talk

While you may be able to talk a good game, that’s not the only thing you have to do if you want to keep women you want to be dating coming back to you for more. Use body language and gestures to show a woman that you’re really interested in her. For example, you can look in her eyes just a few seconds longer than is comfortable and touch her arm while she’s talking to you or you’re talking to her.

If things are going really well between you and a girl, don’t be afraid to take it a step further. If you and her seem to be really hitting it off, don’t be afraid to take a risk and go in for a kiss. Even if you get rejected 10 times out of 11, all that really mattered was that you got 1 “Yes!”

How To Talk To A Woman About Sex – Without Freaking Her Out

By

Guys need sex advice, especially when it comes to talking to a woman about doing the nasty. Sex is something you want, but you’re not exactly sure how to ask for it. You could be getting along great with a girl and bring up the topic of sex, only to end up scaring her off completely. Here’s how to have a conversation with a girl about sex, without sending her running.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4shxL5GFTyI[/youtube]

Bringing Up The Topic Of Sex Is Risky Business

If you’re nervous about bringing up the topic of sex to a woman – even if you’ve been seeing her for awhile – you have good reason to be. There are many women that will be offended by the discussion of sex, no matter how polite or discreet you are about it.

Every woman will react differently to the topic of sex and the same woman may react in different ways to the same topic, depending on her mood. When talking about sex with a woman, you’re liable to strike out at any moment – but approaching it the right way can make all the difference.

The Indirect Approach

Probably the easiest and most friendly way to bring up the topic of sex with a girl is indirectly. Start talking about sex in a way that doesn’t directly involve you or her. For example, you’re definitely going to get shot down if you start talking about what kind of sex positions she likes. However, if you bring up the topic in an indirect way, such as telling a funny story about sex positions gone wrong, she’s more likely to laugh with you and open up to the idea of talking about sex with you.

Make sure that when using the indirect approach, you keep everything about other people in other situations. Don’t directly reference you or her, and definitely not you and her together. If you start talking about what “she” likes or what “you” want, you’re going to scare her off instantly.

Start Learning About Sex

For a girl to be comfortable talking about sex with you, you’ve got to be comfortable with the idea of sex yourself first. If a little dirty talk makes you blush or stutter, you’re not going to convince any girl to carry on a conversation with you like that. It can be difficult if you come from a conservative family, however, the more you learn about sex the more you will be able to talk about it smoothly and confidently. Read a sex advice column, or check out some online resources for sex tips and sex advice.

Pay Attention To Her Response

One thing that a lot of guys miss when having a conversation of this nature is reading a woman’s cues and knowing when it’s gone too far – and when to stop. There are many cues a woman will give you to let you know that now is not the right time to talk about this and she’s not into what you’re saying. If she’s exhibiting these signs during the conversation and you press the issue, you may end up turning her off for good.

  • Turning or looking away from you.
  • Acting embarrassed or blushing.
  • Stuttering her responses or acting nervous in general.
  • Short responses or refusal to answer any questions
  • Trying to change the topic

If She Engages You

If you’ve stayed confident and cool, made her laugh and created a little bit of playful sexual tension, she might end up engaging you in the conversation about sex and even contribute to it, taking things further. If she does engage in the conversation with you, you know that you can take it to the next level and start talking about things that have more to do with you and her. Signs that she’s into it are:

  • Making eye contact with you or looking at her lips
  • Laughing at your jokes
  • Joking with you, cracking jokes of her own
  • Touching you or accidentally brushing up against you
  • Standing close to you

Building Sexual Tension

If she seems responsive to talking about sex at first, it’s up to you to create sexual tension between you and her. This is what will ultimately lead to actually getting to have sex with her! The best sex advice to get a woman into bed is to always leave her guessing and keep a flirty element of mystery about you. When revealing information about yourself, don’t give away too much at once. Let her wonder a little bit and allow her imagination to go wild.

Being Sexually Confident

Girls are naturally attracted to sexually confident guys. They’re not attracted to wimpy looking guys that don’t look like they’re secure in themselves at all – so to even get her to want to talk to you, you’ve got to exude an air of self confidence and friendliness. However, you must remember that sexual confidence can go too far and suddenly become creepy and obsessive. Make sure that your sexual confidence doesn’t border on the strange side. You definitely don’t want to come across as just another horny guy looking to score – because this will turn her off immediately.

Relax And Have Fun

Remember that dating and talking to women is all about having fun and getting to know people. If you’re too uptight, worried or nervous about talking to women about sex, you’re not going to get very far. Relax, be yourself and focus on having a good time and making sure others have a good time as well. If you get your date laughing, talking and having fun, she’ll become more and more relaxed around you – giving you the opportunity to bring up the topic of sex without her shying away.

How To Talk A Woman Into Bed

By

Sex isn’t something you can just jump right into – most of the time, anyway. Girls need a little warm up time before getting in the mood, and they don’t get turned on the same way guys do, just by looking at someone of the opposite sex naked. Girls respond better to sensual, seductive language. Here’s what you can say before sex to get her hot – and ready to jump in bed with you!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RMAbaP3kXoc&feature=relmfu[/youtube]

Girls Love Words

Remembering the fundamental difference between men and women is probably going to be your key to success in getting a woman to have sex with you. Men are essentially visual creatures and respond well to visual stimuli such as porn, but girls on the other hand, enjoy words more, such as sexy stories and erotic novels. This is why you will see a woman not really care about a porn, but get completely horny after reading a sensual novel.

Be Aware Of Her Insecurities

Guys love to compliment girls and girls love to be complimented – however, if you’re complimenting the parts of her body that she’s insecure about, it’s going to turn her off. For example, you may think her belly is so cute or hot and she may think her belly is her most flawed body part. Women don’t look at themselves the same way men do – as just being hot from head to toe. A woman will stand in front of a mirror and pick out her “flaws,” even when she looks great.

When talking to her and telling her how amazing she looks, find out what she likes best about herself. It may not even be something sexual – she may think her feet are really cute (especially if she gets pedicures often) or she may love her hair. It doesn’t matter what it is – if you find a way to compliment what she loves about herself, it will get her turned on more than anything else you can say.

Compliment Her With Emotion

When you do find something to compliment or talk about, it’s important that you do it with emotion and sensual words. Telling her that her hair looks “great” or her legs are “hot” isn’t going to get you anywhere with a woman. Instead, make sure that the words you choose to use are full of emotion. Tell her that her legs look “amazing” or “incredible.” Touch her hair and talk about how “soft” and “silky” it is and how you love the feel of it on your skin.

Remember that giving empty sounding compliments can actually do more damage than good. If you and your partner have used the “L” word to tell each other how you feel, don’t be afraid to use it now. Tell your partner how much you love her and care deeply for her – this will get her emotions on fire!

Use Descriptive Language

Because women are such verbal creatures, choosing descriptive language is extremely important. Telling your lover how “horny” you are or saying that she looks “hot” isn’t going to cut it if you’re trying to get her in bed. Instead, try these easy to use, descriptive words next time your talking to a woman:

  • “Soft” as in: “Your skin is so soft and smooth.”
  • “Silky” as in: “Your silky pajamas make my skin tingle.”
  • “Hard” as in: “It has been so hard waiting for you all day.”
  • “Ravish” as in: “I can’t wait to ravish your body.”
  • “Luscious” as in: “Your lips are so luscious, can I kiss them?”
  • “Intoxicate” as in: “The sultry sound of your voice is completely intoxicating.”

Make Sure Your Body Language And Facial Expressions Match Your Emotions

Once you’ve gotten the language down pat, you want to make sure that your body language and your facial expressions not only match your emotions, but also match the descriptive words you’re using. If you’re telling her how luscious her lips are, lick your lips and look deeply into her eyes, switching your gaze from her eyes to her lips until you move in for the kiss.

You don’t want to tell her how soft and silky her hair is if you’re not going to run your fingers through it and pull her in for a deep, sensual kiss. You don’t want to tell her how difficult it was waiting for her all day if you’re not actually showing her how you feel through your facial expressions and your body language. Make sure that you’re not only communicating with your verbal language, but you’re also communicating through your actions and facial expressions as well.

How To Talk To Women Without Freezing Up

By

Dating can be intimidating if you don’t know how to talk to women. Many guys get nervous or frustrated when they try to talk to women, because they’re just not sure what to say, how to act or what to do. Here’s what you can to do make sure you don’t clam up and make a fool out of yourself!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wD2UBF0Q1og[/youtube]

Relax!

The most important thing you can do when dating and talking to women is to relax and take everything in stride. When you start getting stressed out and worried about doing well or what she’ll think of you, everything will go downhill quickly. Give off an energy of being quiet, calm and confident. Relax and be fun to be around. Laugh at things around you that are funny and stay calm. Don’t allow yourself to get too nervous or worked up over dating, because if you do, you’ve already sealed your fate and you won’t do well at all.

Avoid Trying Too Hard

A lot of guys end up trying to hard when dating. They try too hard to be funny, but end up telling really lame or offensive jokes. Or, they may try too hard to be sexy or to turn a woman on, but they end up coming across as really overbearing, sexual or creepy. The best thing you can do is to avoid trying TOO hard. You definitely want to put your best foot forward, but this is where relaxing comes into play. You want to keep from trying to hard, because you’ll probably end up turning her off, big time.

Be Yourself

A girl is going to find out who you really are anyway once you start dating her, so why not just be yourself from the very get go? Along with trying too hard, a lot of men try to be the kind of guy they think a woman wants, but it usually ends up backfiring. While you definitely want to be the best you that there is, don’t pretend to like things you don’t like, do things you don’t do or dislike things you actually really enjoy. Be confident in who you are and put yourself out there. There are definitely going to be women who will appreciate that you took the risk to be honest and true to yourself.

Things To Talk About

Most guys worry about what to say when it comes to dating. They want specific things that they can discuss during a date so they never have a lull in the conversation or those awkward silences. While following where the conversation naturally leads is the best thing you can do, here are some things you can say (and things you need to avoid) to be successful.

  • Do you have anything in common? This can be movies, music, hobbies or whatever. Think about the things you like and ask her if she likes any of the same things.
  • Don’t talk too much about yourself. This can make you seem egotistical and self absorbed – which every woman hates. Make sure you ask her questions about herself too and genuinely listen to her answers.
  • Don’t complain about things. While you might be getting really crappy service at the restaurant you’re at, or you spilled on yourself and your car won’t start, it’s important that you laugh things off – especially on the first date. Don’t come off too pessimistic.

Focus On Her

Do you know how many times a girl has been on a date with a guy that won’t shut up about himself? Tons. So don’t be that guy. Instead, put the focus on her. Ask her questions (that aren’t too creepy) and be interested in the answers. What does she like to do for fun? What kind of music does she like or what kind of movies does she like to watch? What is she passionate about? What drives her? What is she proud of in her life? If you ask a woman about herself and are actually interested in what she has to say (and she will sense if you’re faking it) she’ll be smitten with you from the get go.

Don’t Be Afraid To Flirt

Girls love flirting – that’s all there is too it. Flirting can be so much fun for both the guy and the girl. Tease her, compliment her, touch her lightly on the arm or leg and get close to her. Laugh at things that are funny and give her a genuine smile with some smoldering eye contact. Witty banter is priceless when it comes to talking to women, but make sure you’re not teasing her too hard. Mixing up a little teasing with genuine compliments and good, engaging conversation is an excellent formula for flirting success.

Things To Remember

While you definitely want everything to develop on its own naturally, there are some things you want to keep in mind when you’re out dating and making friends with women:

  • You’re not “performing.” Relax and have fun!
  • Avoid pick up lines. Pick up lines almost never work.
  • Women are attracted to men that give off a fun, confident energy. Be that guy! People will start to flock to you (girls included) if you are fun to hang out with.
  • Don’t be afraid of pauses in the conversation. All conversations have natural pauses, especially if you’re having dinner – you definitely need to take a few minutes here and there to eat! Let the conversation develop naturally, without worrying about awkward silences. Pauses in the conversation actually create sexual tension – which is a very good thing!

Practice Makes Perfect

Like with anything, practice makes perfect when it comes to dating and having a conversation with a woman. If you struggle with being comfortable talking to women, practice doing it even with girls you’re not interested in dating. Go up to women on a daily basis and make an effort to strike up conversations with them. It may be difficult for you to do at first, but as you continue doing it, you’re going to become more and more comfortable with the concept of just approaching women and making conversation with them. This means that when the right girl finally does come along, you’re going to be well prepared for having a fun, successful conversation with her.