Oral sex is something that almost every girl loves once she’s tried it, but a lot of women haven’t been brave enough to let their partners put their heads down there. Is your woman a cunnilingus virgin? Lucky you, it’s your sexual duty to initiate her in the erotic joys of cunnilingus!
This may come as a surprise to you but not all women come with full knowledge and acceptance of cunnilingus or ‘being eaten out’. From a woman’s point of view, oral sex is often a matter of trust, i.e., opening up her most ‘scared place’ for ‘close scrutiny’ to you. In fact, believe it or not, there are plenty of women out there who are more open to sexual intercourse than cunnilingus. They claim that the latter is a more ‘private affair’. I know, go figure.
If your partner is a oral sex virgin, don’t lose hope end assume she’s deadest against it. For all you know, she’s simply waiting for the right guy to show her the high sexual pleasure that it brings.
Discuss, Don’t Dictate
The wrong approach to take is to STATE that she ‘needs’ to experience cunnilingus. For one, you probably don’t even know why she’s not into being muff dived yet so don’t assume anything. Instead, communicate with her about it. Ask if she has any negative impressions or bad experiences regarding oral sex so that you’re better able to address whatever it is that’s eating her up (pun intended).
Also, showing that you’re willing to discuss and understand her shows your caring side, which in turn makes her trust you more, which in turn makes her more open to the thought of you going down on her.
Try, Don’t Force
As a cunnilingus virgin, it’s understandable that she may be a bit squeamish about the whole affair the first time. Don’t expect compete and wild abandon here. And don’t force her to feel great about it either by ramming your tongue deeper into her or propelling it like helicopter blades. You might hurt her, making her think oral sex is not pleasurable at all!
Also, don’t be offended by immediate reaction she has. For example, here’s a story from one of my clients, let’s just call him Jack.
So Jack was eating his lady out. Since she was new to cunnilingus, her emotions about all the new sexual feelings where everywhere. Her physical response to this was to bring her thighs tightly together – that’s right, squeezing Jack’s head between her legs! Anyway, Jack understood this so he GENTLY pried her legs apart and licked her clitoris more gently to make her relax.
Can you imagine if, feeling a bit of pain, Jack drastically pulled his head away? That would rudely abruptly her sexual pleasure and might even make her think he doesn’t like eating her out after all.
Explore, Don’t Just Apply
Although she may be a oral sex virgin, it doesn’t mean that techniques that worked for your previous partners will work on her. For one, some women, like it rough, others don’t. Some women like their g-spot massaged while being licked, others don’t. And so on.
So for her first time, just be gentle and go with the flow. Be attuned with her body and its reactions instead of trying to apply – what you think – is a great cunnilingus formula.
Encourage Trust, Not Misgivings
Again, since this is her first time with oral sex, it’s important to start gently so that you earn her trust. If you go down there like Rambo, and chances are she’s not ready for that at all, she will instinctively assume that she’ll experience some sort of pain or discomfort. As a result, she will not be completely open to the whole thing anymore.
Also, at the very least, she may not feel much sexual pleasure at all, enabling her to incorrectly assume that oral sex is no big deal.
Make It All About HER Pleasure
Try not to be the great Casanova as you go down on her or revel in the fact that you’re her sexual teacher, and she your helpless sex student who wants nothing more than to accept your moves.
Sometimes, men can get so full in their heads about how they’re such great lovers that the focus is all wrong. So this time, make it all about her. Her body, her reactions, her sexual pleasure. If she achieves an orgasm during cunnilingus, GREAT but it’s not your goal.
Your goal is to simply let her know how sexually enriching cunnilingus is and that it’s another way you can enrich your relationship – sexually and otherwise. Good luck!