Oral sex can be an excellent bridge to first time anal sex if you’re careful how you go about it. Here’s what to do to get the ball rolling on anal play.
The Connection Between Oral Sex And Anal Sex
What’s the connection? It’s best to start slowly introducing anal play to your partner while you’re giving them great oral sex. Why? Because you create an association in their mind with something they already like (oral sex) with the thing you’re trying to get them to like (anal sex). Creating that association is key.
So is going slowly. You cant go from cunnilingus to having anal sex with them right away. It’s never a good idea, especially if your relationship is newer and/or this is the first time the two of you have had anal. Slowly is the key word. While giving your partner oral sex, gently introduce a finger up their butt or massage or stroke their taint. That’s a good one. The taint is the gateway drug to anal sex. If they love it when you play with their taint, you’re golden. If you’re patient.
Are YOU Open To Anal Play?
Another thing when trying to introduce your partner to anal sex is to consider whether or not you would be open to reciving it. Yes, you. Most people who are trying to introduce their partner to anal sex (men) are interested in being the giver, not the reciever. You have to be open to receiving as well, if you really want to do it.
Maybe she’s willing to let you do it to her, after she gets to do it for you. Again, what’s good for the goose is good for the gander (we’re sure they were referring to anal sex when they came up with this saying, aren’t you?) and if you’re truly wanting her to open herself to the possiblity of anal play, you’re going to have to be willing to spread your own cheeks and take it like a man (literally).
Why men have such hang ups on this, we’ll never know. It doesn’t make you gay. Any sex act that occurs between two people of different genders is by default, heterosexual in nature. Just remember to go slow, breathe deep and use lots of lube. If you don’t follow those three steps, your transition from oral sex to anal sex will be a short trip. It will stop all the fun, and often leads to injury. The emergency rooms of the world are filled with people who didn’t heed this warning. Don’t believe us? Call the E.R. and ask.
Who Is Really After The Anal Play?
There’s a really big elephant in the room here, and it’s time we talked about it. Who wants to add anal sex to your oral sex and intercourse buffet of sex? You or your partner or both? Are you trying to tell your partner it’s okay to do, because you know deep down they secretly want to? Or is it something you want to do and you really don’t care if he/she’s into it or not. You can’t force anyone to do anything.
Unless you’re Rick James or Charlie Sheen. And even they would up paying for it eventually. Putting pressure on your partner to do something they really aren’t into and won’t enjoy is just not cool and always ends in disaster. It will blow up in your face (and not in a fun way). The only question is when and how bad. So don’t do that. It’s not worth jepardizing your relationship with your partner for something like this.
If that’s the case, talk about your desires with your partner and why your’e interested in going from oral sex to anal sex. Maybe it’s not the anal sex itself that turns you on. Maybe it’s something else. Starting a dialogue is always the first step to great sex, because it will get things out in the open, you’ll get a feel for what the other is into and open to and then you can come to some kind of understanding, and that leads to compromise. Which, honestly, at the end of the day is what relationships of all kinds are all about. Alot of give and take as it were. And no, that’s not code for a something.