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Dating Tips: You Got Her Number – Now What?

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Scoring a girl’s phone number when dating can seem like a huge success – and it is. But the question is, what do you do after you get her number? The thought can definitely be nerve wracking because this is where you can really make or break the relationship. When you call her and what you say to her can make her blow you off completely or become super interested in you. So here’s the downlow on what to do after you get her number so you can get a second date – and maybe even more!

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What Are You Trying To Achieve With Her?

So you’ve chatted a super cute girl up at the bar and you’ve gotten her number – score! But now you’re just not quite sure what to do with it. You’re staring at it like it’s an alien that will take over your body if you touch it the wrong way and you can’t help but look at it every five seconds for fear that it will scamper off the counter and be lost forever. Many guys are so freaked out by what to say when they call a girl for the first time after getting her phone number that they don’t end up calling her at all – or they call so many days or weeks later that she barely remembers who he was. Before you call a girl, think about what you’re trying to achieve with her. Are you looking to date her and form a solid, long term relationship? Or are you looking for more of a casual friendship or a hook up? Thinking about what you really want first can help you set the stage for what to say next.

There’s Not A Right Time, But There Is A Wrong Time

The “right time” to call a girl after you score her phone number is pretty much whenever you feel the desire to talk to her or ask her out on a date. So really, there is no “right time.” The idea of waiting a certain number of days before you call her so you don’t seem desperate is an outdated myth that will only serve to make her think you’re not interested in her at all. So don’t worry about the “right” time to call her – instead, worry about the “wrong” time to make your move. Waiting too long to call her after you’ve gotten her number may make her think you’re not interested in her, or worse, she may have forgotten who you were by the time you get around to dialing her number. She won’t remember why she gave you her number and she’ll be more reluctant to set up a date with you if she does at all.

Keep It Simple

When calling a girl you just met, it’s definitely important to keep the conversation simple. Be honest, and let her know you really enjoyed talking with her when you met. Elaborating on how awesome, wonderful, sexy and hot she is will just make you seem creepy and stalker-ish. So keep the conversation short and simply let her know that you had a great time and you’d love to do it again. Be prepared with a date idea, but make sure it’s something casual like going out for a cup of coffee or grabbing a quick lunch together. This is especially true if you had a difficult time getting her number to begin with – suggesting a long, romantic dinner at the fancy restaurant downtown really isn’t going to get you anywhere here.

Texting Can Be Your Best Friend

In the age of technology, it’s important not to overlook texting as a mode of communication. Texts are wonderful ways to connect with a woman after getting her number and it won’t put either you or her on the spot. After meeting her and scoring her phone number, send her a short and sweet text the next day letting her know you enjoyed her company – and leave it at that. Chances are, she’ll text you back and let you know that she had fun too. You can also suggest going out on a date in a text, but again, make sure it’s a simple, short date like coffee or lunch. Don’t blow up her phone with tons of texts though – if you do, you’ll seem just as creepy and weird as if you called her a hundred times. Give her time to think about it and answer your text. Remember that she did give you her number and that means she liked you enough to do so. Play it cool and you’ll definitely score the opportunity to get to know her and let her get to know you.

How To Attract Women By Using The Power Of Sexual Tension

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Learning how to attract women begins with mastering sexual tension. Instead of behaving like an average guy who simply agrees with everything she says, I’m going to show you how to TEASE and TEST women so that you seem like a guy who is “hard to get.” This is the key to building sexual tension and amping up a woman’s attraction towards you — because when she senses that she can’t have you, she’s going to want you even more!

Learn This Powerful Method To Attract Women

I want to share with you my “secret tactic” to attract women and get them into bed fast…but first, I want you to imagine the following scenario.

Let’s say you’re talking to a girl and the conversation is flowing. You’ve got some things in common with her, she’s easy to talk to, and everything seems to be going pretty well.

After ten or twenty minutes (or even an hour) of friendly conversation, she tells you she needs to get going…so you take out your phone and get her phone number.

You figure this girl LIKES you. Seeing her again shouldn’t be a problem. But when you text her or call her the next day, you don’t get a response. Or if you do get a response, she can’t remember who you are at first…and when you try to ask her out on a date, she tells you she’s extremely busy this week (and next week, and the week after that…as far as going on a date with you, she’s apparently booked up for the next 40 years).

What’s up with this? How come a girl can seem “into” you during that first conversation, but she treats like you like a telemarketer when call to see her again?

It comes down to one word. You might have made her laugh…she may have found you interesting to talk to….but you failed to make her feel any ATTRACTION.

And in order for a girl to feel that deep, undeniable, gut-level attraction, she needs to feel one thing: SEXUAL TENSION.

The “Secret Weapon” To Attract Women

The words “sexual tension” might sound to you like a bad thing. But it’s not. What it really means is, she’s starting to feel attracted to you…but she’s not sure whether you feel the same way about her.

Sexual tension develops when she starts to WANT you…but she doesn’t know if she can HAVE you.

And women want what they can’t have! They love a guy who is a challenge. This is one of the big reasons why “bad boys,” who are cocky, playful, and obviously have a lot of sexual options, are able to attract women effortlessly. They’re sexually attractive to women on a gut level — even if they are the WORST kinds of guys for them to be in a relationship with!

This is why in order to attract women, you need to “shift gears” at some point during the conversation and start teasing her and framing yourself as a CHALLENGE. You can’t let the conversation stay stuck in “neutral.”

Here’s the basic formula: talk to her for a little while and get to know her, so that she feels comfortable with you, and THEN you start teasing her and acting like you’re “not sure” about her.

You make her feel that she has to EARN a spot on “your team.” And this is where the level of sexual tension goes through the roof!

Here Are Some Cocky, Playful Tactics To Help You Attract Women

Mention how you two could never date.

“You and I definitely have a lot of chemistry, but we could never be boyfriend and girlfriend. We’re way too much alike. We’d be breaking up all the time, and then having wild make-up sex and destroying all of my expensive furniture…it’s probably not a good idea.”

“It’s too bad I swore off dating girls like you…”

“You’re a nice girl—you really shouldn’t be hanging out with a guy like me. I could get you in all kinds of trouble.”

“You’re such a sweet girl…you should probably be talking to a nice boy like the one over there (point to some dorky-looking dude). I’m more like the guy your mom warned you about.”

Accuse her of hitting on you.

If it’s time to get her a drink—or she offers to buy you one—say, “Okay, one drink, but promise you won’t try to take advantage of me.”

Or, “It’s going to take more than a drink to get me into bed. I expect dinner and a movie at least.”

If she touches you, you can say “Hey, hands off the merchandise. That’ll be twenty dollars.”

When she asks you a question, say “You are totally hitting on me right now. That’s one of the questions I ask girls when I’m hitting on them. It’s okay, I just want you to know I expect you to buy me dinner and a movie before anything happens.”

Employ her/fire her.

When she mentions something that she’s good at, or an area where she is experienced, tell her you’re “hiring” her to help you with it. This frames you as the more powerful one in the conversation, and gives you a reason to “fire” her at any time (in a playful way).

“You seem like a smart girl who’s on the ball. I’m hiring you as my personal assistant.”

“So you know about all the nightclubs. I’m hiring you. From now on you’re my personal party planner whenever I have friends come to town.”

You get the idea. You can “hire” her to do anything. You can make her your personal party DJ, fashion stylist, gym trainer, or website designer. The fun part is that when she says something corny or lame, you can “fire” her:

“Oh my God, I can’t believe you just said that. That’s it—you’re fired. Tell the girl over there in the red dress she can submit her resume.”

It’s all in good fun, but you’re sending the message that you’re the one in control and calling the shots. As long as BEFORE the teasing you spent some time getting her to feel comfortable with you, and interested, these types of lines will create sexual tension and make her want to PROVE herself.

Use the point system.

“Okay, I’m going to ask you something but be careful how you answer, because this answer is worth ten points….”

(This is when you can use one of the “Hypotheticals” in my book, Mack Tactics. These are clever, provocative “hypothetical questions” you can pose to her, that will really make her think and cause her to expose deeper aspects of her personality.)

Whatever your question is, if she answers it “correctly” tell her she has earned ten points — and if she gets up to fifty points she wins a bonus (which can be a drink). This now becomes a theme that runs through the conversation. Deduct points for lame answers. Award points for good ones.

You’re building compliance and sending a message: it’s her job to impress you, not the other way around. You’re making her want to earn your approval. When you start “framing” your conversations this way, you’ll find it much easier to attract women on a sexual level instead of being the “nice guy” or the “friend” she has no interest in having sex with.

Online Social Networking Etiquette For Couples

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Facebook, Myspace, and other online social networks have become an integral part of our social and dating experience in recent years. Their use is ubiquitous, particularly among twenty- and thirty-somethings, yet they’re still fairly new mediums. That being the case, it can sometimes be difficult to decide what is and isn’t appropriate to discuss and post on these sites. When you change your status to “In a Relationship,” what counts as over-sharing, and what could be detrimental to your romance’s success? You’re putting your relationship out into the public eye, so it’s absolutely necessary to think before you type.

You Can’t Take Back What Is In Print

There are two hugely important things to remember about what you post online—everyone you’ve listed as a friend can read or see it, and it’s now officially in print. That means that you can’t take it back as easily as you could if you just said something in person. If you say something embarrassing about your significant other, post a picture that they’d prefer remain private, or something else that could similarly upset them, you can take it down after the fact. However, most people you know have already seen it. That’s an argument waiting to happen, no question. It’s probably best that you check in with your girlfriend or boyfriend before posting anything that directly involves them, and if you even remotely suspect they might be upset by it, just don’t do it. Additionally, remember that certain things you post will be visible to your significant other’s online friends, which could include their family members. The fear of your girlfriend’s mom reading that you think her butt is hot should be reason enough to keep things clean.

Don’t Argue With Your Partner Online

You should also always remember that Facebook and Myspace are not appropriate forums for arguing with your significant other. Not only will you make all of your online friends feel incredibly uncomfortable (no one likes to bear witness to other people’s disagreements), but once things calm down, it will be horribly embarrassing for you and your partner. Now other people know all about the dark side of your relationship. Furthermore, there can be legal implications down the line—some divorce lawyers are actually starting to use comments and posts from social networking sites as fodder in custody battles and settlements. This is a good reminder, yet again, that once things are in print, they can come back to bite you.

Don’t Be Overly Mushy Online

So what if you don’t argue online or post unflattering pictures of your S.O.? What else is there to worry about online? Believe it or not, posting too many positive or mushy remarks can be equally un-cool. If you’re posting on your mate’s wall once a day about how much you love them, you’re opening yourself and your relationship up to judgment from your online friends. Most people aren’t going to see that and just think that you’re the most romantic couple ever. They’re going to wonder if you’re making such a big deal publicly because things aren’t going so hot behind the scenes. Additionally, there’s just an element of the annoying to this behavior. You should be telling your significant other that you love them on a daily basis in person, not online. Someone’s Facebook wall isn’t an inbox, either—if you need to ask your spouse to pick up some milk or want to tell them about your day at work, do it over the phone or in an email. In general, don’t post anything on your girlfriend or boyfriend’s wall that you wouldn’t post on a regular friend’s wall, and you’ll be just fine in love and online.

How To Tell If He – Or She – Is Interested In You

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We’ve all heard the old cliché before—women are from Venus, men are from Mars. People wouldn’t say it if it weren’t at least partially true, right? Guys and girls may have a lot in common, but both genders certainly have their differences—not least of all when it comes to our dating skills and the way we communicate with each other. That being the case, how are the gents supposed to know when the ladies are into them? How can a woman be certain that the man she’s interested in is attracted to her?

Is She Into You?

Let’s start with the ladies. There are many different ways that women can indicate their interest in men. Some of their actions are thought out and intentional, some done entirely on a subconscious level. Imagine you, a guy, are at a friend’s party. You start talking with one of the girls there that you’ve not met before, and she’s flirting with you. She’s laughing at your jokes, asking you a lot of questions about yourself, maybe even making a point to touch your arm or shoulder once or twice during the conversation.

All of these are classic signs that she’s into you. Some women like to play hard to get, though, so if she walks off after several minutes of flirting, don’t automatically assume it’s over. Take note—even when she’s across the room talking to other people, does she glance over at you from time to time? Does she seem less animated when she’s talking with other guys than when she was talking to you? If so, you’re still on her mind—she’s just trying not to look too overly interested for fear you may think she’s desperate.

Some girls may also playfully tease you if they’re interested, so if she jokes about you and then leans in close to laugh, she clearly likes you. If a woman isn’t interested in you, she’ll try to be subtle about it at first. She’s not going to be mean to you, but she’ll probably do her best to keep from being alone with you. That may mean calling over a friend to join the conversation, or walking off the minute she gets a chance. If she’s taken, she’ll also make a point of bringing up her boyfriend or spouse pretty early on in the conversation. If she’s not taken, she may casually mention having feelings for some other guy (or, if he’s near, start flirting with him right in front of you).

Is He Into You?

So what if you’re the girl at the party teasing the fellow—how can you judge whether or not you’ve got him intrigued? Guys aren’t as subtle as girls can be, so that definitely helps out. If a guy is spending a lot of time talking to you, and, more importantly, actually listening to what you have to say, that’s a pretty good sign he finds you attractive. If he’s really turning on the charm (cracking jokes, flashing big grins, leaning in toward you a lot when he’s talking), then he is definitely interested in you.

But maybe the guy you’re conversing with is a tad on the shy side, so he’s not doing too much talking. As you interact with him, do you notice him increasingly coming out of his shell? Maybe at first you’re doing more of the talking, but the minute you hit on a common topic, he perks up and starts talking more in return. Any indication that he’s feeling more at ease with you than other people in the room is a good sign that he likes you. Shy (or just quiet) guys won’t open up for just anybody. Whether a guy is more bold or not, take note of how engaged he truly is in your conversation.

Men can’t hide their boredom as well as women do, and if he’s not interested, he won’t be making a lot of eye contact with you. Instead, he’ll be too busy looking around for an excuse to step away from you. Boys also tend to step up their manners a bit when they first meet a girl they’re attracted to—he’ll try to be on his best behavior to impress you. If he’s belching, making a lot of crude jokes or, worst of all, making crass remarks about other girls in the room, odds are good that he doesn’t think you’re a potential date.

How To Tell When He – Or She – Is NOT Into You

If all goes well in your first encounter, and you exchange phone numbers, know this– a lot of guys really do believe you should wait three to five days before calling a girl you’ve just met. This is a ridiculous but popular “rule,” so ladies, don’t get too offended if it takes a few days for them to reach out. If more than a week passes by though, it’s pretty safe to assume they’re not interested in you.

Men, some women will definitely call you within a day or two of the first date if they’re really interested. However, a lot of other women are still a little old-fashioned when it comes to phone etiquette, and would prefer for the guy to make the first move. So if she doesn’t call you in a few days, just call her. Don’t let it make you think she’s not attracted to you. If she screens your calls and doesn’t pick up, that is, of course, a whole other story.

There is one final telltale sign of attraction that both the guys and the gals can’t help but display. If you’re trying to figure out if he or she has the hots for you, look into his/her eyes. As mentioned in the article “How to Read His Body Language” by Amber Madison on Shine from Yahoo, when you’re attracted to someone, your pupils dilate and become larger than normal. So take a good long look into your potential paramour’s peepers, and you may just find the evidence you’re looking for!

Top 5 Dating Mistakes That Women Make With Men

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Great men are hard to find and even harder to keep. So when you find one, don’t ruin your chances of turning it into a great relationship by making these deadly dating mistakes. Remember, attractive men have dated a lot of women, so they know what’s going on. The result? They’ll disappear before you realize you’ve done anything wrong. Here’s how to avoid the top five dating mistakes that women make with men so you can increase your chances of keeping a keeper.

Mistake #1: Sharing Your Feelings With Him Too Early

Men love their freedom and independence ­- no mysteries there! So when you announce that you love him, it often sets off a trigger that you might be one of those “clingy types.” This will no doubt send him running out the door as quick as he can manage. Play it safe and remember that the early stages of dating should always remain casual.

Only after you get to know each other really well should you pursue anything further. It’s also worth mentioning that you can’t logically convince someone to fall in love with you. Falling in love is a process that happens outside the conscious mind ­and there’s nothing you can do to make it happen, speed it up or make it stop. It will happen when it happens. It may happen for you well before it happens for him or vice versa. It is wise to keep your feelings to yourself until you’ve been dating them for quite some time or they’ve decided to say it first.

Mistake #2: Trying To Push It Too Far Too Soon

It’s natural to wonder about the nature of your relationship. “Does he want more? Or is this just a fling?” But remember, if you start talking about marriage after only 12 months, you could ruin your chances to take things further. And if you don’t live together, cooking dinner or doing his laundry isn’t a good idea.

A nice meal once in a while is okay, but don’t make it a regular thing. Yes, it’s true, many men are scared of commitment; but just because they don’t want it now, doesn’t mean they don’t want to settle down. They just need time. Let your man take the lead when it comes to announcing the state of the relationship or addressing the marriage, moving in or long term relationship issues. If you surprise him with something he’s not ready for, it will definitely freak him out and these things can’t be taken back once you’ve let them out in the open.

Mistake #3: Being Too Available

You might think this is playing a mind game or being manipulative, but putting your best side forward is also manipulative. Why? Because it’s done to get a desirable outcome. This is simply a reminder to be who you were before you met the man and continue to be that person, rather than use trickery.

Remember that your busy, interesting and fun life only has so much time for him, no matter how much you like him. And remember, men love a challenge, so this actually works in your favor. Don’t put aside everything you did before you met him to make room for him in your life. Instead, continue on about your business just as it was before you met him. He can wait a day or two for a dinner date if you have other things to do and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Mistake #4: Not Being Yourself

Men love confident women with a strong sense of self-worth. Unfortunately, women often try to guess how the man wants them to act and try to accommodate his mold, which leaves very little room for your own personality to shine. (And yes, men do this too.) Instead of trying to be what you think he wants you to be, simply be yourself and let him fall in love with you just the way you are.

Mistake #5: Putting Too Much Stock In Outward Appearances

Believe it or not, it’s NOT make-up, dyed hair, pretty clothes or even nice shoes that attract men, not into a successful long-term relationships anyway! While “looks” is the obvious factor that seems to get an instant response from men, long-term success comes with finding a man who admires and respects you regardless of your exterior. If your man only likes you for your looks, then he doesn’t really love you. Look your best, but don’t go out of your way. Don’t do anything you wouldn’t normally do to make yourself look good. Remember, you want him to fall in love with you.