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You are here: Home / Archives for Dating Tips

Dating Tips: How To Make The First Approach

By vindicarlo

Dating starts when you first go up to a woman – but the way you do it can be crucial to how far you can go with her. Here’s how to make the initial introduction perfect.

So maybe you are out running an every day errand, maybe you are getting some drinks at a bar or club, either way, all you know is that you are going a long with your business and like a fly to a neon light, you see some girl that completely captures your attention. All you want is to be able to go up and talk to her, flirt with her, sweep her off her feet, and walk out with her.

However for some, this task simply remains an idea while they sit idly and watch the girl they admire walk away, many times to never be seen again. Well if one can apply the simple concepts presented in this article, difficulty making an introduction will become a thing of the past.

She Probably Won’t Introduce Herself To You

First thing you need to understand is that the girl will almost never make an introduction on you, per say. What I mean is that it is extremely rare that any girl will go out of her way, go up to you, and initiate the conversation, I don’t care how good looking you are, it almost never happens so get that idea out of your head and never wait around for it. Girls do however go out of their way to make themselves readily available for your introduction.

This is because it is your job, as the man, to go up, pick the girl you want, and initiate the conversation. It is your right as a man; never forget this. There is nothing socially wrong with it, if anything it is expected of you.

So the key to a successful first introduction is identifying what kind of girls want to be approached. Often times, it goes wrong for a guy it is because they are waiting around too long, missing opportunities the girl presents, or simply introduce yourself girls that are not currently open to flirting. So the step is identifying the two major things that a girl will do to open herself to your introduction.

How She Will Open Herself Up To You

Eye Contact

This is by far the most important window that a girl can present to you for you to open. Think about what its like when you walk through a busy street. As you walk on your way, there are naturally people that just catch your eye, sometimes it is a pretty girl, other times it is just someone in your vicinity, point is subconsciously your mind works to make yourself aware of your surroundings. We do this by making brief eye contact with the people around us and girls do the same exact thing.

If you are out and about and you happen to notice a girl look in your direction and you make eye contact with her, even for just a brief second, consider that your push in the butt to go up and talk to her. Because she has recognized you in her surroundings/subconscious, she will not be startled and taken aback by your introduction, in fact about 80% of the time girls make eye contact with a guy is because they found something about them attractive in one way. Think of it like an 80% chance that the dating will go well.

Proximity

Meaning that the girl is in your vicinity. Think of it like this, you are at bar or club and you see a girl you like within her group of friends. Her actions may show that she is in fact very open to being approached, regardless if they are on purpose or subconscious. If you notice the girl standing within a 10 foot radius of yourself for more than 3 mins, she has processed you in her surroundings and will be much more susceptible to an introduction. If you notice her walking by you on more than one occasion, you sure as hell better make an introduction. And lastly if you are noticing her facing you within her group or wherever she may be, she is opening herself to be approached by you.

Combining eye contact and proximity will make the dating go smoothly, especially if you can combine it with this very simple formula for introducing yourself to a girl you find attractive.

Now what I am about to share may sound like a pick up line to some but it should not be viewed like that. It should be viewed as a natural response to a women you find attractive. Although sometimes there are opportunities where something clever and situational can be made into an introduction, it is much simpler to have a natural response to women you find attractive so you don’t over think anything.

Foolproof Introduction To An Attractive Girl

Walk over. Stop. Make eye contact and say:

“Hey I know this seems random but I think you are really cute and I wanted to come over and introduce myself, my name is ______”

Then stick your hand out for a handshake.

This direct introduction works because it allows her to see your intentions from the start, showing you have a general interest in her, if she engages in the conversation, then she is accepting your interest and you already know from the start it is on. Also by putting your hand out and introducing yourself, it allows for her to accept your introduction and be open to a conversation cause you are just being friendly. It is a natural response to shake hands and introduce yourself to someone you just met so by encouraging her to do so after your introduction.

By saying “I know this seems random” in the beginning, you are also addressing the only real objection a girl has to a stranger approaching them, having it be random, so by saying it you take that fear away. Also if you had got eye contact with her or it had her in your proximity, your introduction will be anything but random.

If you can make this style of introduction your go to move when you have nothing clever to say or are otherwise at a loss for words, you will find that even the most attractive girls open up because you are showing social awareness and genuine interest.

Filed Under: Dating Tips Tagged With: approach women, ask a girl out, confidence, Dating Tips, flirting

Do Women Show Their Cleavage On Purpose?

By loveandsex

When dating, do all ladies expose their breasts intentionally to get a man’s attention, or is it something that happens unintentionally? Do some girls do it deliberately while others do it by accident? Here’s the truth on why girls might expose their breasts deliberately, such as while dating, but also why it’s probably not intentional every time her breasts show.

Do you think girls frequently expose their breasts on purpose? How often do girls show it intentionally, or is it usually inadvertently?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2zyKXzk518c&feature=relmfu[/youtube]

It Depends On A Woman’s Mood

Whether a woman shows her breasts or not depends entirely on what mood she’s in. In fact, pretty much everything a woman does depends on what mood she’s in! Perhaps she’s dating around and feeling like flirting a little – she is probably going to be more inclined to show her breasts off in a low cut shirt. If she is not feeling as sexy, she will probably wear a shirt that doesn’t show as much.

However, if a woman’s breasts are showing, don’t assume that it is because she wanted it to.  It could possibly be unintentional as well. She may not have given it any thought at all – certainly not as much thought as many men do. Most ladies are very much into fashion and style – that’s a no brainer. So a woman might wear a shirt that is low cut and shows the tops of a her breasts simply because she likes the shirt, or it might go really well with an outfit or a favorite piece of jewelry.

Men Want To See Breasts

Girls know from experience in the dating field that men respond very well to short shorts and a little boob action. If a woman is trying to get a date, she might wear a lower cut shirt in the hopes that a guy will notice her and come up and introduce himself to her and possibly ask her out. There’s a reason that Victoria’s Secret push up bras are so popular! Chances are, if men responded as well to a long sleeve turtleneck as they did a deep v-neck top, turtlenecks would be the new “in fashion” item!

The same goes for lingerie. Lingerie wasn’t designed because ladies enjoy walking around in garter belts and crotchless panties. It’s almost never something a woman gets for herself if she doesn’t have a man who will get to see it on her. It was designed with men in mind. Men love to see girls’ bodies and lingerie was created to accent and show off certain parts of girls’ bodies that guys find attractive!

It Might Just Be Hot Out

Another reason a woman might be showing her breasts accidentally is if she’s wearing a low cut shirt or tank top because it’s hot out. Just like men take their shirts completely off or wear a tank top or thin shirt sometimes if it’s very warm out, a woman might wear a shirt that has a little less to it for comfort reasons or because she wants to get a little sun.

Also, ladies that have very large breasts get warmer up there more quickly than ladies with smaller breasts. It can get a little damp and sweaty up there if a woman has larger breasts, which can be extremely uncomfortable and even cause rashes or chafing. So it makes sense that wearing a low cut shirt would help keep a woman more cool and comfortable during the warmer months.

Are There Girls That Use Their Breasts To Entice And Manipulate Men?

There are girls out there that will use their bodies to their advantage to attract men and make them start thinking about sex from the get go. Whether they’re wearing itty bitty shorts, a low cut shirt, a backless dress or a miniskirt, they’re doing it because they know it will grab a lot of men’s attention and that’s what they’re after. But that doesn’t mean that all girls who expose their breasts are doing it for this particular reason.

While there are a portion of ladies that do expose their breasts intentionally to manipulate men, this number is far lower than the number of men who notice! Men think about it much more than girls do, so chances are, if you’re noticing a woman’s breasts in a low cut shirt, she probably didn’t do it deliberately. She probably has another reason for letting the girls out – like comfort or fashion.

Filed Under: Dating Tips Tagged With: body language, Dating Tips, flirting, self esteem

Achieve Your Goal Of Being Good With Women In 5 Easy Steps

By vindicarlo

Dating isn’t easy, and being good with ladies is even more difficult. Many guys are too shy to consider themselves suave when it comes to dating, but that doesn’t mean that they can’t work the ladies. If you’re a guy who has a tough time approaching or talking to girls, you’re definitely not alone. Not to worry – here’s how you can  your dating ambitions – today!

A Serious Plan Of Action

If you are not using objectives to attain what you desire in life (such as being great at dating), you are probably seeing very little success. People seem to think that fixing a problem is the way to bring success into their life. It is like people have tunnel vision just to find the things that are holding them back, or even more so, identifying problems as the things that are holding you back.

Here is the fact of the matter, no one is plagued with the tragedy that is perfection. In fact if someone was perfect, they would be terrible with girls simply because they would not be able to relate to anyone they meet, especially when they meet women. Being able to relate is a huge factor in attracting girls so by trying to solve all your problems, you are making your ability to be good with ladies even harder.

The true way to succeed in dating through actions while learning to work with your problems. I don’t even want to go as far to call our flaws “problems” because they ultimately work in your favor if you are taking action and moving forward with your life. And that is what this article aims for you to do.

Step 1: Identify The Ultimate Objective

If you are reading this, I know why you are here, your ambition is to be successful with women, have options in your life when it comes to choosing girls you want to be with and developing the social skills to start dating successfully. All this falls under “Being Great with Girls” and that is your Ultimate Goal. What you define as being great with ladies will be determined in the next step.

Step 2: Create Objectives That Will Make You Better At Dating

As I’m sure you have heard being good with ladies is both an external and internal pathway of development. Your actions and thoughts must be aligned in the right way to attract the girls you want and your dating objectives should reflect this. Create 5 for your inner self-improvement, and 5 for your outer self.

What I mean is there are ambitions that will directly affect your inner thoughts/mindsets/beliefs and there are ones that will affect your appearance and social skills. Here are some examples but all the ambitions you write should be reflective of what you ultimately want to accomplish, being good with ladies.

Example:

Inner Objectives:

1. Rid myself of the fear to talk to an attractive girls I don’t know.

2. Identify and embraces my passion

3. Become more confident in my self-image

Outer Objectives

1. Be able to bring girls home the night I meet them

2. Not have conversations die when I am talking to ladies

3. Develop a better fashion sense.

You should ultimately create 10 dating objectives for yourself, if you are having trouble thinking of some I have provided a few ideas above but this is your own journey of self discovery and it is important some of them are that of your own.

Step 3: Prioritizing

It is important to reflect and find what ambitions are the most important to you in accomplishing – such as dating – while at the same time creating order to which ones you need to stay on top of. The great thing about this type of training is that if you constantly keep them in mind (I recommend printing a sheet of them and carrying it with you) you will see opportunities for you to take action and attain them.

Step 4: Create A Plan Of Action

I want you to sit down and reflect on each dating objective. Under each, list actual things you can start doing to make these things happen. You are essentially taking your aspirations and breaking them into the things you need to start doing to make them start manifesting. You are creating a plan of action and this is the most important step. This type of training works on success, finding things you can do to bring yourself to the next step.

Your focus will begin to shift away from your problems as you constantly find ways to continue to move forward in your life. As you accomplish each objective, you notice the next one becoming easier and easier because all these aspirations are reflective of each other. This is one of the few things where things get easier every step of the way. The hardest part is only in the beginning and by having a plan of action; the first step is not even that hard. Also the objectives you prioritized the highest should have the most plans of action because it is the area that needs the most work.

Remember a plan of action for each of your aspirations is something that you can physically do to bring yourself to the next level. Each plan for action should push you a bit further. Even if it seems impossible at the time, the impossible becomes possible if you keep working at it.

Example:

Inner Objective:

1. Rid myself of my fear to talk to women I don’t know

Plan of Action:

a. Start small talk with 10 strangers in a day while out and about

b. Start small talk with 5 girls you find attractive while out and about

c. Approach 3 girls you are attracted to by stating your attraction for them. “I think you are really cute”

d. Approach 5 girls in a row and have each one lead to a solid conversation.

Inner Objective:

2. Become more confident in myself image

Plan Of Action:

a. Loose 10 pounds

b. Put on 5 pounds in muscle mass

c. Find a hairdresser that will cut and style my hair. (No more barbers! Find a hot hairdresser that cares about you looking good)

d. Have a girl compliment me on my looks while out and about

Outer Objective:

1. Be able to bring girls home the night I meet them

Plan Of Action:

a. Find and become a regular at a place near my house to take girls on dates

b. Think of non sex reasons for girls to come over

c. Get a car

d. Find social venues near by your place to meet girls.

Outer Objective:

2. Not have conversations die when I am talking to girls

Plan Of Action:

a. Hold a conversation for 3 minutes with a girl

b. Hold a conversation for 10 minutes with a girl

c. Hold a conversation with a large group of ladies for 10 minutes

d. Go an entire conversation without asking about mundane things like names, jobs, and college majors

Outer Objective:

3. Develop a better fashion sense.

Plan Of Action:

a. Subscribe to a magazine like GQ

b. Set a day aside to spend a decent amount on a new wardrobe

c. Cultivate a female friendship where she can help you find what looks good on you

d. Make sure you get a new wardrobe at least every season as they come along

Step 5: TAKE ACTION!

This step is by far the most important. Now that you have a plan to take action go and do so. Organize your list and create an action plan for each and every one. The more plans of action you have the better. Now print out a list of them that you can carry on you and make an effort to accomplish at least one a week.

If you continue this exercise, I GUARENTEE you will be better with girls. It is the only time I can give a 100% not a single doubt in my mind guarantee that doing this will drastically improve your results with them. I honestly don’t know what other motivation besides that I can give you. Best of luck.

Filed Under: Dating Tips Tagged With: confidence, Dating Tips

How To Use Eye Contact To Approach Women

By vindicarlo

Dating is most successful when you use body language to your advantage. Eye contact is one of the most powerful forms of body language and it alone can attract a woman to you. Girls are actually CONSTANTLY trying to approach and talk to you. Now you might be saying that you have never had a girl come up and talk to you out of the blue, however by no means does this mean that she did not approach you. Girls just view approaching a stranger very different than men do.

Women Definitely Want To Be Approached

When they’re dating (not in a relationship), girls are constantly giving signs for people to come up and talk to them. Sometimes it is a blatant sign directed towards one guy, or it can just be the way she is carrying herself to hope that any guy comes up to spark a conversation. For the most part, I feel 80% of men miss out on these signs or misread them.

Just accept by rule of thumb that a girl will not go out of her way and directly spark a conversation up with you, however she will throw up all kinds of signs for you to come over and talk to her. As someone that is naturally good at dating women, it is your job to be able to read these signs and immediately act upon them.

Before we get into specific signs that girls give, I want to introduce you to the most powerful weapon in any naturals’ arsenal. It is by far the best tool we have for creating a fast and strong connection with the opposite sex. It is in effect before you even say your first words, all the way to the moment she is back in your bedroom. This tool is non-other than eye contact.

Using Your Eyes The Right Way

To master this dating tool you must know how to use your eyes in the right way. If you are like I used to be, you probably never really thought about the eye contact you were making. However, once I started incorporating it properly, I don’t know how I ever did without it.

I first noticed its power as I was walking through a mall. When you are walking in any busy area, there are constantly people you just happen to notice. Many people walk by without catching your eye, while others just seem to draw your attention. Sometimes it is just your mind creating awareness of the space around you, and other time it is something like a pretty girl walking by that catches your attention, either way your focus is always shifting from person to person.

It goes the same way with girls, as they are walking down the street they are constantly looking at people, sometimes you may see them walk right by you without them noticing you, and other times you will catch them make brief eye contact with you. This is your moment to go up to her and start flirting. If a girl walking by has made some form of eye contact with you, it is either her creating awareness of her surroundings, or there is something about you that caught her attention. Either way you have just entered her conscious awareness, making any approach you make with less likely to catch her off guard and will lead to a smoother interaction.

Being Aware Of The People Around You

Try to take note of all the people walking by that you make eye contact with, and then start to get into the habit of approaching these people, you will notice a much warmer response because just from her noticing you for a brief second, you have become less of a stranger in her mind. There is a slight level of familiarity that will help you get your foot in the door with every interaction.

There are more blatant signs that girls give in a variety of situations that are even more powerful than just the passing glance. If you go out to a bar, club, or any place of social nature, you are bound to run into three types of girls giving off very unique signs for you to talk to them. Learn to recognize these types of girls and always approach them.

Signs She Wants To Talk To You

The Gazing Girl

This is the most common sign/type of girl you will see. It is similar to the passing glance we were talking about but is a little more direct. Say you are sitting with your friends at one end of the bar and you notice a girl at another end look over at you and your friends. She is not going to do anything overly seductive; she is just going to make a brief second of eye contact with you then break it.

Now girls already think this a big sign for a guy to approach them but they do not realize how subtle and easy to dismiss it is. So they will follow up once more with a look over. If you have not already gotten and up and are on your way to approach, then consider this second glance a flashing neon light saying GO TALK TO HER. Girls think this sign is obvious and get frustrated that guys miss it. She will not keep going out of her way to make eye contact with you. In almost all cases she will only make it twice (if that) then move on.

The Wandering Girl

Another form of body language girls will use to show they want to be approached is by creating proximity to you. They will either leave to go the bathroom or get a drink, and in turn walk past you, or they will choose to form their group somewhere within a 15 to 20 foot proximity of yourself.

Consider all girls within 20 feet of you as a girl that wants to be approached by you. The closer she is, the more she wants to be approached. If she is this close to you, she is aware of your existence in one form of another so even if she was not intentionally making herself closer to you, she is comfortable with you being in her near proximity. This in turn will result in a more successful and warmer response to any approach you make.

The Dancing Girl

This girl is easy to spot, she will be hanging out with her group of friends, not really paying attention and simply dancing or bobbing her head to the song that is being played. Simply go up and approach and before the conversation can really even spark say how you like this song and tell her to “come dance.” Very assertive and easy.

After the song is over you can suggest walking off the dance floor and talking to her. Chat her up and ask her out on a date. Also look for this sign when you are talking up any girl at a bar or club, if you are having a good conversation and she starts to seem into the song, it is her sign that she wants to dance with you and is often a great way to begin any form of escalation towards sex.

The key to this dating advice is being more aware of your surroundings and to pay attention to the people looking at you/near you. You will begin to notice countless opportunities for you to approach and they all start with a simple subtle glance. Don’t miss them!

Final note on eye contact: When conversing with a girl, make an effort to hold eye contact just a few seconds longer than you normally would. Girls naturally hold eye contact about two seconds longer than guys feel comfortable doing so and if you have eye contact and your focus in the right place, the girl will start to feel an immediate strong bond with you.

It is also a great tool for creating sexual tension and sometimes eye contact can fill any void in conversation. If the girl likes you, she will make an effort to hold eye contact with you, allow her to and be comfortable with it.

Filed Under: Dating Tips Tagged With: ask a girl out, body language, confidence, Dating Tips, flirting

Dating Tips: How To Keep A Group Date From Becoming A Total Disaster

By loveandsex

While dating is typically only about you and your significant other, there are times when you’ll end up heading out with other couples. Group dates can be highly enjoyable, especially when you’re with a group of mutual friends and have fun plans. They can also go horribly awry—the more people involved, the higher the chance that someone’s not having a good time. Before you and your S.O. accept an invitation to a group date, make sure to think over a few important points.

Who To Invite

First and foremost, you need to consider who all is going to be heading out together on the date. How well do you know everyone? Is there a person whom you or your partner find particularly difficult to spend time with? If you learn that someone you really don’t enjoy being around will be there, you may want to skip this particular group date. If you don’t know one or two of the people who are coming along, you should try to find out more about them from your other friends.

It’s best to go into a group date situation knowing at least a little about everyone involved. It will make conversations easier and rule out the element of the unknown. It’s important to avoid group dates with another couple that’s volatile—you don’t want someone else’s fighting to cause drama in your own relationship. Plus, even if their fighting doesn’t spread to you, they’ll make your whole date a downer. It’s also important to consider how many couples should go out together on the date.

The more people you add to the mix, the higher the odds of someone having a bad time and bringing the rest of the group down. You may have a lot more fun having dinner with one other couple that you both like than two or three other couples you don’t know very well.

What To Do

Once you know that you’ve got a fun group lined up to hang out, you’ll need to consider what kind of activity works well for a group date. Sporty activities like bowling, a game of softball, or a round of mini golf can be fun with a group. However, if one or two of your friends is hyper-competitive, or you know a few people really don’t like sports, it’s worth planning something else.

It’s key to make sure that you find something everyone will enjoy, otherwise you might find one or two people in the group are moping around. If not everyone in the group already knows each other, you might want to do something that will provide you with a talking point. Go to a movie or show and then have drinks afterward, that way you’ll all have something to discuss. That also lets everyone relax for the first part of the night, since you can’t really talk during a film or performance.

Group dates can also be a good way for you to introduce your significant other to your friends, or vice versa. If everyone’s having a great time, your friends will probably appreciate your new boyfriend or girlfriend even more. That’s part of why it’s important to pick out an activity that will be fun for everyone involved.

Why Group Dates Can Be Fun

While you should still spend most of your dating time one-on-one with your significant other, having a group date every now and again is a great idea. It helps you connect with your friends and your boyfriend or girlfriend at the same time, and it adds some variety to your dating plans. It can be a really good way to get out of a rut. Even if a group date goes horribly wrong, you might still get something good out of it. Sometimes just seeing another couple have a meltdown can make you realize just how good you’ve got it in your own relationship!

Filed Under: Dating Tips Tagged With: Dating Tips, first date, flirting

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