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Why Men Fail Miserably at Giving Their Women Orgasms – Even After Applying the Right Techniques

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As men, we are put under a lot of pressure in terms of how we perform as lovers. The media ensure’s this by battering us with statistics on the huge percentages of women that find it difficult to achieve orgasms.

In addition to that, men also have to measure up against porn and main stream movie stars that always seem to effortlessly give their lovers mind blowing orgasms.

Lastly, to complicate this stressed out situation even more, you are also obliged to give your partner multiple orgasms, g-spot orgasms, a-spot orgasms, clitoral orgasms and blended orgasms.

Techniques Don’t Always Work

Though there are many great guides that teach us powerful techniques in cunnilingus, fingering and intercourse, many men are rudely surprised that these techniques don’t always work out like they are supposed to.

This stresses them out even more, and soon the whole episode turns into a nightmare.

Okay, before you give up on the cause of becoming a masterful lover, take a deep breath, relax, and clear your mind. You are about to learn that being a great lover is not just about technique.

Yes, technique does play an important part in helping your partner achieve powerful orgasms, but only if it is applied with the right approach and mindset.

So, what is the Right Approach and Mindset?

Stop putting so much pressure on yourself in the bedroom. Have fun. After all, who ever wanted something as enjoyable as sex to turn into a chore, or worse yet, a science project?

You are not the only one that gets affected with the stress that is induced by this type of pressure. Your partner will notice how stressed you are, and ultimately, it will affect her overall performance in bed as well.

The last thing you want is for your lover to be worried that she might let you down by not reaching an orgasm. She will feel obliged to do anything she can in order to make you happy, even if it means having to lie by faking an orgasm. Ultimately, you will learn nothing, and she will gain nothing.

Approach your love making sessions with a sense of humor. Learn to laugh at yourself and the situation if things don’t go as planned. This will keep the environment between you and your lover relaxed and fun. Most importantly, it will help to keep the doors of communication wide open.

Communicate Openly

Once you are able to communicate openly and in a relaxed manner with your partner, everything will start to make sense.

Having the right approach and mindset will also make the task of learning new techniques in cunnilingus, fingering and intercourse easier. You will have a better understanding of how to apply these techniques because of the relaxed manner in which you and your partner are able to communicate.

You will realize that every woman will have different wants and needs when it comes to sex. You will also realize that it takes time to truly learn your lover. Most importantly, you will realize that there really is no hurry, because both of you are having fun. 

The Lazy Man’s Guide to Great Sex

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Everyone wants great sex, but because of a busy lifestyle that include kids, work, bills and a list of other everyday stresses we have to deal with, not everyone has the time or energy to give 100% during their lovemaking sessions.

Sometimes, we want to have mind blowing sex, but want to get it over with sooner than later, so we can get some sleep and get up for work the next morning!

Well, I’m here to tell you that you can have your cake and eat it too 🙂

The tips & techniques I’m about to show you are simple and energy-efficient. They’re great to use when you’re feeling tired, lack the physical stamina to do the karma sutra sex positions, don’t have the time to engage in all-night honeymoon-like sex, and most importantly, they are EFFECTIVE.

You’ll learn:

  • The best sex position for simultaneous orgasms
  • The best way to finger a girl
  • 1 simple ingredient you can add to oral sex that will give her goose bumps

Best Sex Position

Do you know what the best sex position is for giving you and your partner the feelings of intimacy? And at the same time, increasing your changes of simultaneous orgasms?

Before I share that with you, let me share something with you…

In many sex surveys, one of the most favorite sex position chosen by women is the missionary position.

At first I was a bit surprised to hear this; after all, there are other positions that can allow for greater feelings of physical pleasure. But after hearing the reason why women like this position, I can understand.

Here’s why: Women like the missionary position because of the face-to-face contact it provides. In other words, they liked the feeling of intimacy…

Even though this position isn’t ideal for female orgasms, it’s still a favorite among women.

Well, I’m sure you know exactly how to do the missionary mission, so I’m not going to teach you that 😛

But, the key idea here is this feeling of “Intimacy”.

Now, how can we better grasp this concept of “intimacy”? In other words, how can we increase the levels of intimacy, at the same time, increase the chances of female orgasms?

Enter the C.A.T

The Coital Alignment Technique (or CAT for short), is by far the best position for female orgasms.

Why?

Because this position is designed to maximize clitoral stimulation during intercourse…something that most other sex positions can’t!

The CAT position looks like the regular missionary position, but with a slight adjustment.

The main difference is that the male will penetrate from a higher angle (compared to the standard missionary position). And instead of thrusting in and out, the movement is more of a rocking or rubbing action.

Why The CAT Position Works

A woman can have an orgasm quickly and easily because the CAT position allows a woman’s clitoris to be stimulated. The stimulation from the base of the penis & pubic bone on the clitoris, combined with the rocking/rubbing action of the pelvis will allow a woman to reach orgasm. But it doesn’t end here… It’s a great sex position for men too. The woman’s legs are closer together, making the vagina feel “tighter”.

WARNING: The feeling of tightness might make men orgasm quicker than normal!

Combining the enhanced clitoral stimulation, tighter feel of the vagina, and face-to-face, body-pressed-on-body intimacy…achieving orgasms at the same time has never been easier!

How To Do The Coital Alignment Technique

Step 1: To get in the CAT position, slide your body 2-4 inches forward from the typical missionary position so that your pelvis is directly over hers.

Step 2: Your body should fall flat on hers (make sure that you support your body enough so you don’t crush her!).

Step 3: Both of your spines should be straight, and your bodies should be parallel to each other.

Step 4: You can be in between her legs, with her ankles wrapped around your calves. However, I’ve found from my experience that if she keeps her legs close together and you place your legs OUTSIDE of hers, it will produce a better response.

Step 5: Instead of thrusting in and out hard and fast like you would in the regular missionary position, what you’ll do is slowly and gently rock your hips. The base of your penis and your pubic bone will naturally rub up against her clitoris. Also, because you’re moving in a rhythmic rocking motion, you won’t be stimulate your penis as much compared to a thrusting motion, allowing you to last longer during sex.

Tip:

  • The pleasure will build gradually, and the both of you will have orgasms that are much more intense and intimate compared to the missionary position.
  • As you sense an orgasm coming (from her or yourself), don’t speed up! Just maintain the gentle rocking motion and the orgasm will come naturally instead of being chased.
  • When you feel the sensations getting stronger, don’t speed up the rocking movement! What you want to do is continue at the same pace, and allow the orgasm to overtake you. I know this sounds hard to understand, but trust me on this one.

Best Way To Finger A Girl

I’m going to teach you an awesome way to ‘finger a girl’. Actually, this technique doesn’t involve vaginal penetration, so technically, it’s not fingering. But no matter, it still works pretty well 😉

It’s actually a “technique” that women use all the time. When masturbating, some women will start from the position of using her first and fourth fingers to spread open her labia, while the middle finger strokes her clitoris.

You can modify this for your purposes by using one hand to hold her open and the other hand (middle finger only) to tease and rub on her clitoris.

In the woman-on-top sex position, she can incorporate this technique by stimulating her own clitoris while you’re making love.

Here’s how to do it:

Step 1: Locate her vaginal opening with the tips of your index and pointer fingers

Step 2: Slide your fingers directly upward along and between the inner labia of her vagina until you find her clitoris

Step 3: Spread your fingers apart so that your index finger is holding her left inner labia and your small fingers are holding her right labia away from the clitoris

Step 4: Your middle finger should be directly over the clitoris or within easy reach

Step 5: Begin light but circular strokes on and around the surface of the clitoris

Step 6: You can also occasionally dip your fingers down to the vaginal opening and stroke upward from the opening to the base of the clitoris

Step 7: Pay attention to how the clitoris responds to your touch As the clitoris becomes more stimulated and aroused it will swell and become harder and harder

Step 8: Use your sense of touch to determine the best angle, stroke, Pressure and timing for your partner. Let her responding clitoris be your guide.

Chew On This Before You Eat A Girl Out

You can enhance the pleasure of just about any oral sex technique with this one ingredient.

For this one to work, you’ll need to buy a box of Altoids Peppermints.

After you’ve eaten her out for a while, put one in your mouth and crunch it, letting the peppermint get on your tongue.

Go back and give her a few long slow licks covering her entire vulva. You want to spread the peppermint oil on her genitals…this will give her a cool tingling sensation.

Now, combine this with a “Cool Breath” by gently blowing onto her vulva.

Alternatively, you can try using cough drops, or even an ice cube to produce a similar effect.

BONUS TIP: When she’s performing oral sex on you, have her crunch down on an Altoid before hand. Trust me; you’ll like it just as much as she did!

Here’s What To Do Next

There you have it; now you know how to have time-pressed, great sex with little effort!  However, although these techniques are effective and efficient, you shouldn’t be using them all the time.  Especially when you DO have time to devote 100% to lovemaking and have all-night, “honeymoon-like” sex.

To get you started, I’ve compiled a PDF preview copy of The Female Orgasm Black Book.  It’s filled with TONNES of techniques (oral, manual stimulation, positions etc) just to give you a small taste of what my book is about.

Also, it has pictures!

To see them, visit the The Female Orgasm Black Book, tell me where you want your PDF preview copy, and I’ll send it to you.

For Women Only! How to Make Sex More Pleasurable for YOU…

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Many women find it hard to convey to men what they really want in bed. This is due to many reasons from lack of self-confidence to lack of self-awareness.

Another reason is what makes many relationships, sexual and otherwise, fail: the expectation that men can read a woman’s mind and automatically know what she wants in bed!

It is possible for men to discover what works best for you.  But this takes a special kind of man who have dedicated himself to becoming a fantastic lover.

However, not all women have the luxury of being with a man who is skilled in bed.

To experience better sex, you should know what turns you on and love yourself enough to take compliments as they are provided. Here are a few tips to keep in mind:

Clear Your Mind

If you’re self-conscious about something, your mind will be consumed by this and so you can’t focus on sexual pleasure. So better get rid of what’s bothering you even before you engage in sex.

For example, if you’re always insecure of how you smell ‘down there’ then make sure you always shower before engaging in sex. If you’re afraid you might accidentally pee while your G-spot is being stimulated, then go have a bathroom break before making love.

Know What Turns You ON

How can you guide him into what brings you pleasure if you yourself don’t know what does?

Some women have a hard time figuring out what turns them on.  Compare this to men; for the most part, it’s very easy to figure what what turns a man on.

This can actually be a fun time for you.  To know what turns you on, try renting some porn videos and see how you react to what you see. Buy some dirty magazines, romance novels and maybe even some sex toys.

You’ll have to do a bit of self exploration on this one because unlike men, what turns women on is a bit less ‘clear cut’. Once you know what turns you on, experiment with him in bed!

Understand That Men Are Not Mind Readers

Get this straight: Men are NOT mind readers. They cannot instinctively know what brings you the most pleasure. Communicating what is working for you (and making sure that he keeps on doing it) can speed things up towards your female orgasm.

So if you already know what turns you on, don’t be afraid to tell him how best to pleasure you.

Be Specific

For example, if he’s eating you out, tell him exactly how you like to be licked and where.

Communication is key to maximizing your pleasure in bed.  The more you know about yourself, and the more you communicate with him, the more pleasure you’ll have.  The best part is, you’ll enhance the bond you already have with him by making intimate communication a regular activity in bed.

If You Can Orgasm By Yourself, You Can Orgasm During Sex

Take control of your own orgasm and don’t be so dependant on him to “give” it to you.  You can guide him to help you climax during sex, but the quickest way to reach an orgasm (if he’s not sexually skilled) is to help yourself.  There’s nothing wrong with it, and trust me, both parties will be happier in the end.

You can apply clitoral stimulation during intercourse, however, not all sex positions are great for self-stimulation.  There are a few good positions, like the woman-on-top position that lends itself well to clitoral stimulation.

Taming The Tiger: Exploring Female Sexual Pleasure

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Female sexuality has always been a source of mystery and power.  Even during ancient times, philosophers and poets often devoted themselves to discovering the hidden secrets of female sexuality.

However, many of these exposed “secrets” painted female sexuality as something to be feared as opposed to celebrated.

The Sexuality of Women is a Mystery

Today, the sexuality of women is still a mysterious subject for many including females themselves!  Thanks to the nearly impossible work schedules of our work lives and the hectic demands from our family and friends, women often leave their own sexuality on the back burner, choosing instead to put the needs of others before their own.

It’s not entirely a conscious choice, either, as many women feel more comfortable catering to the needs of their family, friends and lovers before paying attention to their own.

Modern Life Affects Women’s Sexuality

Modern life can also have a draining effect on female sexual power, as the daily stresses of our day-to-day schedules can not only have a negative effect on women’s emotional and mental well-being, but her sexual force as well.

Women, think about it this way: how many nights have you returned home from work or a social outing, only to reject the advances of your lover because you were too tired or stressed to even think about making love?

It’s easy to see that female sexuality is often adversely affected by modern life, as stress can prevent a woman’s sexuality from blossoming into the sheer sexual energy that it deserves to be.

It’s no surprise that female sexuality continues to remain an enigmatic puzzle! Yet if you’re looking to reclaim the power and beauty of your own sexuality, then look no further than Tantric text to reawaken the sexual tiger within!

When you think of Tantra, do you think of intense sack sessions full of mind-bending positions that seem nearly impossible? While many may limit their view of Tantra to this picture, Tantra is actually a way of channeling and controlling the sexual energy that courses through our bodies.

What is Tantra?

This method of achieving sexual nirvana actually originated with the Zami cult, a group of women who used Tantra as a way to celebrate the power and beauty of female sexuality.  When Tantra merged with Hindu and Buddhist influences, it became the Tantra that we know of today, a celebratory blend of male and female pleasure, where two lovers can reach sexual nirvana by appreciating the power of each other’s sexual power and energy.

Yet female sexuality cannot be celebrated if women don’t take the time to release and explore their own sexual power.  Want to celebrate your divine sexuality?  Here’s how to battle the modern stresses that women face today in order to reclaim and release the tiger that is female sexuality!

Celebrating Women’s Divine Sexuality

Before you can begin to take charge of your own sexual power, you have to take the time to get in touch with your own inner selves.  Meditation is a perfect means towards achieving this, as you’ll learn to control the energies that flow through your body through breathing and imagery exercises.

Pull down the shades, unplug the phone and find a quiet spot in your house or apartment that brings you peace and pleasure.  Once you’ve settled into a seating position, focus on your controlled breathing.  Image yourself as a blossoming flower or a flaming dragon; feel the energy and power rise up in your body as you imagine your sexuality as an unlimited force, full of potential and endless pleasure.

Practice this meditation exercise each day and you’ll not only find yourself to be more relaxed and tranquil. You’ll come to view your sexuality as the tiger that it is!

The Pursuit of Female Pleasure

Once you’re well-practiced with this meditation exercise, it’s time to move on towards the pursuit of female pleasure.  While laying flat and imaging the same powerful images, use your hands to explore every part of your body.  Don’t rush through this with the goal of orgasm in mind.

Instead, focus on the pleasure that comes with becoming familiar with your sexuality.  As your pleasure increases, imagine that flaming dragon becoming more and more vibrant, until it’s practically an explosion of light and energy.  In this way, you’ll come to associate the pleasurable sensations of exploring your own body with energy and power which is exactly how you should view your own sexuality!

This kind of exploration will take time and practice, as female sexuality is not something that can be explored through only a few meditation sessions.  Yet with practice comes perfection, and once you unleash your new-found sexual energy on your lover, you’ll soon release just how wonderful and powerful female sexuality can be!

G-Spot Amplification: What Everybody Ought to Know About The “G-Shot”

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Do you know how to find the G-Spot?  Despite the tales of mind-blowing, bone-jarring sexual escapades, millions of women have never experienced a G-spot orgasm through intercourse. It remains a frustration in spite of our bodies’ seemingly-perfect design to tap into that well of pleasure.

In fact, many people doubt that the G-spot exists (it does). Our instinctive tendency is to find a “quick fix.”

As our collective sexual frustration and our natural penchant for the speedy solution converge, a potential remedy has surfaced. Known as the “G-Shot”, this remedy promises to transform the “hard to hit” G-spot into a “can’t miss” target. Below, we’ll take a closer look at the controversial G-Shot.

We’ll describe how it works, the risks involved and whether it truly offers access to the mythical G-spot orgasm.

Understanding How The G-Shot Works

In its simplest form, the G-Shot makes a woman’s G-spot larger. In fact, the procedure is often called G-Spot Amplification®. It involves injecting a small amount of collagen into the area of the vaginal wall where the G-spot is located.

The collagen enlarges the G-spot, making it easier for men to stimulate the area. Ultimately, the increased stimulation can lead to stronger, longer-lasting orgasms.

The G-Shot is administered by a doctor and requires local anesthesia. Women who have undergone the procedure claim the entire process takes less than 30 minutes. However, even though the procedure is convenient, it’s important to note that there are risks involved.

Risks Associated With The G-Shot

While many women who have had the G-spot collagen injection claim that it makes achieving orgasms easier, the G-Shot is not without potential unpleasant side effects. For example, some have experienced bladder discomfort. Others have noticed blood present in their urine.

Still others report experiencing a feeling of constant sexual arousal. Other side effects that are associated with the G-Shot procedure include allergic reactions, urinary tract infections, off-putting vaginal discharges and pain during intercourse.

Though the G-Shot is routinely advertised as a “quick fix” solution for an inability to have dependable G-spot orgasms, there are significant risks. In fact, because the number of potential side effects is extensive, a woman is typically required to sign a consent form prior to having the procedure performed.

Doubt From The Medical Community

Adding to the controversy is the fact that many in the medical establishment scoff at the G-Shot’s effectiveness. Their misgivings are largely based upon the lack of clinical evidence supporting the procedure’s efficacy. While many women who have received the collagen injection contend that the shot has a positive effect on their ability to reach a G-spot orgasm, data is limited.

Lack of Clinical Evidence

First, the sample size of those surveyed lacks the breadth to have any significant implications. Second, there is no evidence that a double-blind study (an experiment in which some participants receive the collagen while other participants receive a placebo injection) was performed. Many doctors claim that the G-Shot’s effectiveness remains unproven.

Other Potential Drawbacks Of The G-Shot

There are other criticisms of the procedure. First, it’s expensive. Receiving the collagen injection into the vaginal wall costs approximately $1,800. Many people may initially consider $1,800 to be a small price to pay for sexual satisfaction. But, the inclination to pay that amount of money for what constitutes a natural, healthy sexual result implies a deeper problem:

Lack of sufficient sexual skills.

Another problem with the G-Shot is the need for ongoing treatments. The collagen injection enlarges the G-spot for approximately 4 months. After that time has passed, the collagen deposit is absorbed into the body. To experience the benefit of the G-Shot perpetually, a woman is required to have the procedure performed every 4 months. At $1,800 per injection, the price of sexual fulfillment (which arguably can be easily achieved by developing fundamental sexual skills) can be substantial.

Alternatives To The G-Shot

Many women (and their partners) are stunned to discover the high cost of the G-Shot injections. The need for ongoing treatments makes the procedure even less attractive. However, there are alternatives. Most sex therapists agree that enlarging the G-spot artificially by injecting the area with collagen is not only unnecessary for sexual ecstasy; it’s also unhealthy.

They argue that the body is meant to function sexually without the use of such injections. By developing sufficient sexual skills, most women can achieve powerful G-spot orgasms naturally.

Rather than relying upon a costly invasive procedure, men and women should instead devote time to improving their lovemaking abilities. Men should talk with their partners and identify where the G-spot is located. They should also know which sexual positions are most likely to stimulate a woman’s G-spot. Improving their dexterity and endurance should also be priorities.

Women should take the time to refine their own sexual performance in the bedroom. That includes learning to move their bodies in a way that allows men to hit their G-spot easily.

An Invasive Procedure Is Not The Answer

If a woman is not able to achieve a G-spot orgasm, she should communicate with her partner. Often, the issue lies in her partner’s lack of sexual prowess. That’s also where the solution should be found. That is, her partner can easily learn the ability to stimulate her G-spot.

An invasive procedure like the G-Shot isn’t necessary. Formidable sexual skills can be developed by any man. Once those skills are developed, he can help a woman achieve orgasms on demand.

G-Shot Versus Better Love Making Skills

Many people argue that receiving the G-Shot injection precludes either partner from having to spend time learning the necessary sexual skills. Specifically, a man doesn’t need to learn anything to satisfy the woman. But, that perspective poses 3 problems.

First, using the G-Shot as a means of achieving sexual fulfillment is inconsistent with our bodies’ natural ability to function sexually. In truth, every man and woman should develop sexual proficiency.

Second, relying upon the G-Shot injection could mean spending $1,800 every 4 months (that’s $5400 per year) into the foreseeable future. While that may seem like a workable solution at first, it may be prohibitively costly after a few treatments.

Third, if a couple decides to go their separate ways, neither will have developed the necessary sexual skills for future partners’ satisfaction.

Knowing The Risks And Costs

Making an informed decision requires having enough information. Unfortunately, much is unknown about the G-Shot. There has been no apparent double blind study conducted. Plus, the long-term side effects of undergoing repeated collagen treatments in the vaginal wall has not yet been determined.

The G-Shot injection is a “quick fix” solution to a problem that involves deeper symptoms. Some may liken it to a costly band-aid that forever needs to be replaced.

In the end, the choice is yours. Many people will continue to choose the G-Shot as a “quick fix” solution to their lack of sexual fulfillment (despite the ongoing expense and lack of information about long-term health impacts).

That said, developing the sexual skills you need to please every partner would make the G-Shot irrelevant. In truth, being able to find and hit your partner’s G-spot every time is a simple skill to develop. And it can pay off for the rest of your life.