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First Date Tips: How To Make It Perfect

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The first date is crucial – you want to make sure you get a second, right? We all know that first impressions can also be lasting impressions. As such, the first real date that you have with someone is extremely important. Even if you’ve already known each other as friends or acquaintances, that first date is when you’ll get to see each other in a non-platonic light.

You want to be able to learn more about the person you’re on the date with, and you want them to learn more about you. This is your first chance to show that individual how thoughtful you can be. One of the best ways to do that is to plan a great first date.

How To Stand Out From The Crowd

You not only want to make a good first impression on this date; you also want to stand out from the crowd of potential mates out there. That means planning a date that will be unique compared to most people’s typical first date. Eschew dinner and a movie or dinner and drinks for something more special.

Thinking outside the box will make your date sit up and notice you. Think about doing something that will shine a light on one of your better traits or talents. If you’re a good cook, invite your date over to your place for a dinner made by you, or make something that you can take on a picnic and enjoy together. Just make sure that you don’t come off as being full of yourself, or that the date seems to be centered around only what you enjoy.

Speaking of your date’s enjoyment, tailoring the night around their interests will show how thoughtful you can be. Is there anything you can remember about their hobbies or tastes from the previous conversations that you’ve had? Do you have a mutual friend who you can pump for some information to help plan the date?

Access whatever resources you can (without being a stalker about it, of course) to plot a date that shows you’re willing to put effort into a relationship with this person. If they like music, surprise them by taking them to a concert. If they’re into art or history, take them to the museum for the afternoon.

Take Advantage Of The Current Season

You can also look for special seasonal events that will create a memorable date. In the autumn you can go apple-picking, or in the spring you can visit a botanical garden. Does your date love animals? Take him or her to the zoo if the weather permits it. There are plenty of indoor special events out there, too. Just go online or check out the arts and entertainment section of your local paper.

Maybe a bar near you is having a special beer or wine tasting night, or there might be a touring musical or play in town over the weekend. There are so many options out there that go beyond dinner at a restaurant and two tickets to whatever rom-com is playing at a theater near you.

Most people are just too lazy to look into other first date ideas though, so that’s become the standard date. If you plan something above and beyond for your first date, there will be plenty of time to see movies and eat out on down the line. That initial impression will be certain to score you many more dates to come.

Say Goodbye To Dating Anxiety – Forever!

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Dating is enough to make anyone apprehensive.  Most people worry about saying the right thing, wearing the right clothes and not making any mistakes – but the truth is, you don’t have to be worried about it at all! Here’s how to get rid of dating apprehension for good.

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Most Guys Suffer From Dating Anxiety

If you get apprehensive when you start talking to a girl, you’re not alone. The far majority of guys get a little freaked out when they approach women and they often stutter, fidget or choke on their words. They seem really awkward – even when they’re smooth when they’re around their friends. Even though most guys have trouble with getting flustered and flubbing up when they approach women, you don’t have to!

Understanding Basic Social Anxiety

A lot of people who have apprehension when “dating” may actually just be apprehensive socially. If you find yourself getting flustered most of the time when you’re in a new situation with new people, it may not necessarily be that you are apprehensive about women at all – you may actually have social anxiety. Signs of apprehension in all social situations might be:

  • Freezing up in social situations that do or do not include women
  • Difficulty talking to new people in general
  • Being limited in your ability to express yourself

Being apprehensive in new social situations isn’t uncommon, but it can definitely wreak havoc not only on your love life, but your life in general. Things that should be simple, such as striking up a conversation with a girl or asking a girl out can seem impossible. Other ways it can affect your life might be:

  • Problems talking with new people in general, regardless of their gender
  • Trouble making friends with new people
  • Can lead to sadness, depression and reduced satisfaction with life in general

Relax!

The first thing you need to do when you struggle with getting flustered in new social situations is to make an effort to consciously relax. Any time you start to feel apprehensive, take a few minutes to calm down and breathe in and out slowly. Remember that it’s going to be okay!

You can also practice yoga or meditation in your spare time to learn great relaxation techniques that you can use any time. Yoga and meditation help you learn how to calm down overall, but they also teach techniques that you can use in the heat of the moment to collect yourself and decrease your stress right away.

Practice Makes Perfect

A lot of guys struggle with approaching new people and starting a conversation, simply because they’ve not done it a lot and don’t have any confidence in themselves to do it. It’s normal to be apprehensive about doing something that you’ve never done before or don’t do often – so get out there and practice talking to people! The more you talk to people – both men and women – the less apprehensive you will be about striking up a conversation out of the blue with a new person.

If you focus on meeting new people and putting yourself in new social situations, you’re going to be uncomfortable at first, but you’re going to get used to it and soon it will be like second nature to you. There’s a reason all those “suave” guys are so suave – they go up to women and talk to them all the time!

Getting Help For Serious Anxiety

While most people are at least a little apprehensive in new situations, there are some people who struggle with anxiety all the time. The symptoms of clinical anxiety are similar to general apprehension in new social situations, but can be more persistent or severe. If you struggle with nervousness often, you may want to seek the advice of your doctor or another medical professional. They can help you:

  • Find a counselor or someone to talk to about your feelings
  • Recommend medication for some people
  • Suggest other treatments that may help you lead a more normal, happy life

It’s All About Having Fun

Remember that dating is all about putting yourself out there and having fun. Yes, you risk getting rejected and the more women you approach, the more you might get rejected. However, think of it this way – learn to appreciate any successes you have, no matter how small they are. If you ask out twenty girls and only one of them says yes, don’t think of it as getting nineteen refusals. You have a date soon! Forget all the “no’s” and go get ready for a really great first date.

How To Plan An Incredible Date

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Dating involves coming up with new ideas for dates all the time – check out these amazing tips if you really want to add the “WOW” factor to your next date!

Whether there’s a special occasion on the horizon, like your significant other’s birthday, or it’s just your turn to decide on Friday night’s date, you can make plans that will impress your partner. A little effort and forethought can go a long way toward coming up with a fantastic date concept.

How To Plan The Perfect Date

The key to planning the perfect date is to build it around your mate’s interests. In an ideal world, you’ll be able to find points of interest that you both share. Sometimes, however, you’ll find that you need to go with some ideas that won’t be quite as enjoyable to you as they are to your S.O. Either way, by demonstrating that you’ve paid attention to your partner’s interests, you will be sure to impress and please them.

So start mulling over your mate’s favorite activities, and think back to anything they might have mentioned in recent conversations. Is he/she a music fan, a sports fanatic or a film buff? Whether they’re a foodie, a bookworm, or a theater lover, try to find an out-of-the-ordinary event tied to their big interest.

How To Find Great Date Ideas

Check out the internet or the arts and entertainment section of your local newspaper for upcoming events. Then start thinking outside the box. If your boyfriend or girlfriend is an art lover, see if the city nearest you has a gallery crawl night. It’s like an extra-special trip to the museum. If she is in love with boos, take her to a reading by one of their favorite authors at a local bookstore.

If there’s not a particularly fitting event coming up, try finding a learning experience you can enjoy together. If your S.O. is a gourmand, try taking a cooking class or going to a wine or coffee tasting seminar. If you’re both fitness fiends, look for a walk-in yoga or kick boxing class to attend. Learning experiences are the dates that keep on giving, whether you end up signing up for more classes together or practicing your new skills as a team at home.

Great Dates Can Last All Day – Or Night!

Another key to planning the perfect date is going beyond one simple event. Don’t just buy two tickets to a hard to find foreign film playing at the art house theater near you. Make a full night or afternoon of it. Plan a meal before the movie at a nearby restaurant that serves your S.O.’s favorite kind of food. Then, after the film, grab coffee or drinks together at a new bar or café you haven’t gone to before.

Experiencing new places and things together helps give you both unique memories together. Likewise, you can go the opposite route and recreate elements of a favorite date from earlier in your relationship. Demonstrating that you paid such great attention to a previously beloved evening can be very romantic.

Planning A Theme Date

Going so far as to plan a theme for your date can also be very impressive. Say your boyfriend or girlfriend is a big jazz lover, and you get tickets to see a jazz band perform. Try planning a ‘50s beatnik evening, starting at a coffee house before the performance followed by dinner at a French bistro. You don’t have to dress the part or anything, but that extra attention to detail shows your S.O. how much thought you put into your date ideas.

Even a night in can be more fun with a theme. Instead of your normal Friday night of pizza and TV, try surprising your mate with something unexpected. A homemade Moroccan dinner followed by mint tea and Casablanca on DVD can make for a great evening. In the end, if you show that you considered your partner’s unique tastes and took the time to plan something special, you’ll be sure to have an amazing time together.

What To Talk About On Your First Date

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The first date can be nerve wracking, because you’re just not sure what you’re going to say. Keeping the conversation going between you and a girl isn’t always easy. Here’s how to make the first date go smoothly.

At A Loss For Words?

So say you mustered up the courage to go and approach a girl you find attractive, and she responded well and is engaged in conversation with you, but then all of a sudden you find yourself at a loss for words, and now you are digging for any topic that may keep conversation going. This is a common problem with many men when interacting with women but by simply changing the way you view the interaction can bring your conversation skills through the roof.

Have A Genuine Interest In Her

The number one important thing to finding what to discuss is actually having a genuine interest in the girl you are conversing with. When people try to improve their abilities to converse with and attract the opposite sex, they seem to view many conversations as “practice” and just being able to hold a conversation for an extended period of time becomes the goal at had.

You need to remove yourself from this mindset and make sure your focus is in the right place. If you are focusing on what to say next, there is a good chance you are not listening to or taking in what the girl has to say. Instead always keep your focus on the girl and keep the mindset that you WANT to find more about this person. Every girl you converse with should spark intrigue in you, this will make you ask genuine questions hat lead to genuine answers.

Find Common Ground First

To establish a strong string of conversation, there are two ways you should view the way the conversation you are having. First off, your number one goal with all of this is to find a commonality between the two of you, that is when natural conversation emerges, when you are both discussing something similar you share. The best way to do this is by asking questions that appeal to the girl on an emotional level.

Really Get To Know Her

Instead of just asking one generic question after the other, dig deeper because you actually care to get to know this girl. Ask questions that ask how she feels about that subject, or why she associates with it, or how she plans on engaging what you are discussing. It is like being a good sports reporter. You will never hear the reporter ask simply what the athlete did to score the touchdown, instead they ask how the athlete feels after scoring it. All questions you ask should come from your own expressive curiosity in the girl, only ask things you actually care about.

Listen To What She Is Saying

Next, when the girl is responding to your questions, you want to be listening with an active appreciation for what she is saying. Be happy that this girl is taking the time to open up to you and listen to everything she is saying. Do not worry about what to say next but simply take in her response, if you have gotten her on a semi-emotional level, you will naturally want to respond by opening up about something in your life, which becomes the basis for your first commonality/connection, making the rest of the conversation go very smoothly.

Once You’ve Achieved An Emotional Connection

You have the opportunity to create a connection because you have gotten her on the emotional level, there are so many ways to respond once the girl reaches this state of conversation. For example you could discuss where you lived when you were young, your experiences at the beach, or your favorite childhood memory. Just remember to open up on an emotional conversational level after the girl does and a strong bond will be made, cementing your first conversation on a level like no other.

Foolproof Ways To Get His Or Her Number

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Dating isn’t something you can even think about until you get a phone number. When you meet someone new that sparks your interest, it can be pretty thrilling. In the midst of your flirty conversation, it can be easy to get swept up in the excitement of meeting someone new. All that happiness will mean nothing, however, if you don’t get their contact information.

Though it can feel awkward outright requesting someone’s phone number, you’ll have to find a way to ask for it before your initial meeting is over. A little tact and flirting can go a long way in helping you get that all-important information.

How To Get Their Contact Information

Say you’re out at a party making conversation with a guy or girl who has managed to get your attention. The night is winding down, and you know that you want to see this intriguing individual again. What’s the best way to get their contact information? There are a few different approaches. Simple honesty may be the best. As it’s time to say goodbye, matter-of-factly state that you’re so glad you met, you had a wonderful time talking during the party, and you’d like to see him/her again.

Then ask for a phone number or, at the very least, their email. You can always email them for their number later. If you’re not up to explaining your motives so plainly, mention an upcoming party or group event you’d like to invite them to, and request their number or email so you can send them more information about it. Of course, you’ll have to actually bring them to the event you reference, but that doesn’t mean you can’t call and ask them on a date before then.

Use Social Networking To Your Advantage

If asking for a phone number or email address makes you too nervous, or if you forget to ask while you’re at the party, social networking can save you. It’s not exactly the most impressive way to contact someone, but if you can find them on Facebook or Myspace, you can friend them. Then you can ask for their number in a message. Make a witty remark when you send that message, mentioning that you meant to ask for their number that night, but were so caught up in your great conversation that you forgot to.

A little flattery will get you somewhere, and jokingly acknowledging that you should’ve asked in person helps, too. Another option that will keep you from having to ask is even simpler. While at the party, offer your own number. If you hand over your phone number, the person you’re speaking with is likely to offer you theirs in return, no asking required.

What Not To Do

All of these methods are good, but what should you avoid doing when attempting to get a phone number? Cheesy pick up lines only work if you’re joking, and he or she knows it. Unless you know you’re being so obviously funny that you won’t offend, sleazy lines will ensure you strike out.

Never just walk up to a person, tell them you think they’re cute, and ask for their digits. Have an actual conversation first, and you’re more likely to be taken seriously when the time comes to get his/her number. Most importantly, don’t let on that you’re nervous. This isn’t a wedding proposal—you’re just asking for a phone number! Keep that in mind, remain calm and confident, and you’ll be calling each other in no time.