More sex with their wives is something every husband wants – especially when the fire has died. After a man and a woman have been married for a long period of time, they naturally grow apart sexually. This can be extremely frustrating, because you’re wondering why the sex just isn’t as good (or why you’re not having it as often) as when you and your partner were younger. Getting back into the swing of things just takes a little work though use these three easy tips to get more nookie with your spouse!
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Stop Putting Pressure On Her To Have Sex
You’ve done it before – you’re in the mood and you really want to do it with your partner. However, she really doesn’t feel like doing it at all. She may have had a rough day at work, or she may be worrying about other things. She may even use the classic “headache” excuse to let you know that it’s just not something she’s into right now. However, you’re very into it, so you start pressuring her to have sex with you. Sometimes this works, but it usually only gets you a quickie – if you pressure her to do it and she does, she’s basically getting busy with you just to shut you up.
There’s another problem with this though. If she was even the least little bit turned on before you started pressuring her, it went away as soon as you opened your mouth. Even with the best foreplay and the best techniques, if you pressure her, she’s just not going to get or stay very aroused at all. People face enough pressure in their day to day lives with work, school, bills and children that there’s just no reason to bring it into the bedroom too. Give her a break and don’t pressure her or guilt trip her next time you want to have sex. Just resign yourself to a great masturbation session instead.
Learn How To Tease Her To Build Arousal
Instead of making your lover feel obligated to get it on with you, it’s important to make her want it. She does want it, but her libido is buried underneath layers of stress, worry and items on the to-do list. It’s up to you to tease her and peel those layers away to expose the sexual side within her. A quickie can be a good thing, but women don’t always want to “just go do it real quick right now.” Since women take a while to warm up and become aroused, a quickie is just going to be all about you.
Instead, learn to tease your woman and build her arousal. How do you do that?
Flirting. Flirt with her over the phone, in text messages, in emails and in person. This helps you build her anticipation to see you and to be close to you.
Have Fun. Learn to stop taking life so seriously. If you learn to have fun and let go, your partner is generally going to want to be around you more and spend more time with you because your happiness is infectious.
Touch Her. Start touching her all the time, whether you’re sitting next to each other in the car or just having dinner together after work. Place your hand on her leg, brush up against her. This teasing and touching will get her brain in an aroused mode as she begins to anticipate more and more touching later.
Don’t Expect Sex
If you do all of these things with the expectation that she’s going to do it with you at the end of the day, you’ve already blown it. The whole idea here is to do these things just for the sake of doing them, because you enjoy flirting with your partner, touching her and spending time with her. Let her desire for it develop naturally, without her feeling expected or obligated to. She will come to you for sex when she feels ready.
Be Willing To Walk Away
If you’re doing everything possible to build a sexual relationship between you and your spouse, but she doesn’t seem to want to meet you halfway, you may have to realize that this marriage isn’t for you. Give marriage counseling a good, solid try first before you make a final decision to end it with your spouse but everyone deserves to be happy in a relationship and to feel sexually satisfied. If you can’t get fulfillment with your current partner, it may be time to find someone new.