intimacy – Page 3

How To Cope With Unrequited Love

Love – the unrequited kind – is something most of us have experienced at some point in our lives. You fall in love with someone, they don’t return your feelings, and you just can’t seem to let go. Logic would dictate that you shouldn’t care for someone who doesn’t care for you, but you’re so lovesick that logic no longer matters.

So how can you get over your heart break and your lingering feelings? You owe it to yourself to move forward. It’s important, not least of all because you might miss out on the person you should really be with while you’re mooning over the wrong guy or girl.

People You Can’t Pursue A Relationship With

It can be pretty difficult to see the forest for the trees when you’re head over hills for someone. When that individual doesn’t love you back, however, you need to have a reality check with yourself. Sometimes there are obvious reasons why you shouldn’t pursue a relationship with someone. No matter how attracted you are to them, if the object of your affection is married or in a happy relationship, you need to back down and look elsewhere.

If the person is your boss, your direct report, your current teacher or student, it’s inappropriate to pursue them until you no longer work together directly. When there are overt roadblocks like these, it can be easier to convince yourself to move on. But sometimes the only reason to move forward is because your crush just wants to be friends. Worse, maybe they don’t want anything to do with you at all. In either case, it’s in your best interest to spend a decent amount of time away from this person while focusing on your own happiness.

How To Deal With Rejection

You need to harness optimism in this situation, but it needs to be the healthy and not harmful kind. Move away from wishful thinking regarding the guy or girl who rejected you. There’s no point daydreaming that your married flame will suddenly leave their spouse for you, or that they’ll wake up one morning and realize they actually are in love with you.

Harness that source of hope inside yourself and direct it toward better things. Don’t sit at home and sulk night after night. Instead, enlist the help of your friends to make sure you get out of the house and have some fun. Don’t waste your time looking forward to an impossible relationship. Look forward to your fun weekend plans, to your morning run, or to completing that big project at work. Relegate thinking about love to the background for now, and you’ll find you’re able to take a step or two forward.

Moving On

The most important reason to move on is that there truly are other fish in the sea to date. If you’re busy fixating on one person, you’re missing all the other people out there who could easily be a better fit for you. If you’re out in the world enjoying yourself, you just might bump into Mr. or Ms. Right, and then you won’t give a flip about Mr. or Ms. Rejection anymore. So don’t close yourself off to the world, and don’t cling to false hope.

Instead, embrace the knowledge that there could be someone else out there a thousand times more perfect for you. Go out and live your life to the fullest, and you just might find them when you least expect it. There is no point in puppy dogging around after a lost cause. If they don’t see the value in being with you, they’re not worth it anyway.

Top 5 Ways To Keep Your Man Happy

By dicksinthecity

A great relationship has finally come your way and you’re with a great guy. Congratulations! But just how exactly do you keep your guy blissed out for the next umpteen years while you grow old together? Here are five insightful tips on how to make sure your man stays satisfied and content – and keep him from looking for another relationship?

What She Said

How do you make sure your man stays blissed out in this relationship?

An active sex life – lots of it and make it hot!
Get him a membership to a Beer of the Month Club – it worked for me!
Be a good friend – be sure to have fun together in activities you both enjoy.
Give him some freedom – enjoy the trust and don’t cling.
Offer to skip Valentine’s Day – you’ll be a trendsetting heroine.

The best way to “make” someone else happy is by being confident and joyous in your own life. That shines through to everyone you meet and will also be very appealing to your mate. The bonus? Both your quality of life and your relationship will improve. A happy, confident woman doesn’t rely on someone else to take care of her – and that instantly relieves a lot of stress from a guy’s shoulders.

What Not To Do

Most men I know don’t like crying fits, pouting or being made to feel guilty. I’ve also heard a rumor that they’re not too hip on Valentine’s Day either. This doesn’t mean you can never be sad, be in a bad mood or will be forced to forgo flowers and chocolate. It means for every kind thing he does for you, from comforting you when you’re down to taking you out to dinner, is also deserving of a reciprocal action. It’s not a game of tit-for-tat – it’s a way to keep up a mutual appreciation and admiration within your duo.

Long-term relationships equal work and compromise – but that doesn’t mean it has to be a drag. Skip the drama, be honest and have fun. Treat him like your best friend – because hopefully that’s exactly what he is!

What He Said

Be his own personal slut
Regularly send him to the strip club (with a stack of $1 dollar bills!)
Make him feel like a king
Save the crazy for your girlfriends
Be as fun to be around with your clothes on as you are when your clothes are off

I’m going to get a lot of flack for #1, but let me explain. This is one of those differences between men and women. When a woman hears another woman called a slut or whore, it’s an insult. When a guy hears a girl called a slut or whore it’s a compliment. He doesn’t want you to go out and bang the Pittsburgh Steelers, though. Men aren’t looking for a girl that is “a” whore, they are looking for a girl that is “their” whore. Big difference. If you have moves that make porn stars blush, your man won’t be watching any and he certainly won’t be looking elsewhere.

Making Him Feel Awesome

Sending him to the strip club may seem like it’s a good thing only for him, but really you’re the one that benefits. You look like the coolest chick on the planet (to your man and all his friends) and you have some other girl get him all hot and bothered. All you have to do is wait for him to come home and enjoy.

Making him feel like a king is huge, especially these days. Many hen pecking, man hating feminists have taken great pleasure in cutting the collective balls off of men everywhere. Every man wants to feel like the king of his castle. Make him feel that way. You’ll be glad you did.

Try Not To Be Crazy – Around Him At Least

Save the crazy for your girlfriends (and gay men). Men don’t want to know how neurotic women are. We kind of know already, but don’t remind us. It will send your man running faster than you can say Trophy Wife. Vent to your girlfriends and to your gays (if you don’t have any gays in your life, I really have to question why) and not to your man. You’ll both be glad you did.

The Key To It All

Men love sex, this is true. We also love low maintenance (whoever said men love a ‘challenge,’ ‘the chase’ or ‘the thrill of the hunt’ is out of their damn mind), so be easy about it. Don’t put any pressure or drama (at least any that can be avoided). Just be a super awesome chick that he always wants to hang out with (even when you’re not boning each other) and you will be worth your weight in gold in his eyes (not that you’re fat. You’re totally skinny).

How To Make After-Sex Moments Romantic

By loveandsex

After sex, guys are notorious for rolling over and going to sleep. Girls, on the other hand, may get up and rush to the bathroom to get cleaned up right after a man ejaculates inside her. However, these activities can absolutely kill any romantic mood you had going and make the sex seem less than amazing. Try these tips to bask in the after-sex glow and turn up the romance after getting busy.

Get Unplugged

In the age of technology, hardly anyone goes anywhere without their laptops, Kindles or iPhones and this includes the bedroom. Your guy may want to flip on the game after doing it, while you may want to text your best friend to tell her the amazing new thing your man did during oral sex.

Instead of turning on the television, checking your email or uploading a book to your e-reader, take some time to get unplugged after having sex. If you have to, turn everything off before you get busy so you’re not tempted. You may want to even go so far as to turn off your phones so that no one can bother you while you enjoy some quiet time with your partner after an amazing orgasm or two.

Soap Down With An After-Sex Shower

You and your lover may both want to clean up after sex, but that doesn’t mean you have to make it all business and no fun. Shower sex is great, but you can make having a shower after sex just as much fun! Light some candles or use dimmer switches if you have them and create a little ambiance before you start the water. You can also use your favorite scented body wash or soap and make an event out of it.

Relish the feel of your partner’s skin underneath your hands as you lather up, taking special care of his package to show your partner how good it made you feel just minutes earlier. Wash each other’s hair, giving each other a nice scalp massage in the process. After your shower, put on some comfortable pajamas and head to bed. You’ll both feel amazing after having great sex, great orgasms, a long hot shower and slipping into something that feels nice!

Do A Reverse Strip Tease

After having morning sex, it’s often depressing to watch your partner put their clothes on to get ready for the day. Instead of letting it bum you out, give your partner a sexy, reverse strip tease by putting their clothes on for them. Slowly put your partner’s underwear and socks on, kissing their stomach and legs as you go.

Then, button his shirt up slowly, looking him directly in the eyes as you do it. Finish by putting on his tie for him. He’ll love feeling your hands all over him as you put his clothes on, and you’ll really make him feel like you love him. Make it even sexier by doing a reverse strip tease for him, by slowly putting your clothes on while he watches. Make sure it’s something sexy!

Have A Romantic Meal Afterwards

Most big dates are planned with the romantic dinner at the start of the date and sex afterwards. Instead of going the cliche route, mix it up a little by having sex first and then heading out (or staying in) for a romantic meal! It’s a great way to keep things fresh and exciting without going too far outside your box.

If you don’t feel like going out, order in your favorite meal and have it delivered (and eat it off each other if you like!) or serve something simple like wine and cheese or hors d’oeuvres. Top it off with a relaxing nightcap for the perfect evening!

Make Out

Making out is often what preludes sex, but why not make it the follow up event? Instead of simply going to sleep, heading off to work or doing other mundane things after having mind blowing sex with your lover, try spending several minutes just kissing him deeply and enjoying the feel of each other.

Part of what makes making out less fun when you’re in a relationship with someone is that you pretty much know where it’s going to lead. Pretty soon, you’ll feel a hand on your breast or butt and the game will be on. By making out with your lover after sex, you bring back the element of surprise that made just kissing so much fun when you and your partner first got together!

5 Ways To Re-Spark The Magic Back Into Your Relationship

By loveandsex

Are you frustrated that your relationship doesn’t have the magic and romance that it once had? Do you feel like you and your lover are stuck in a rut and always doing the same things?

You’re not alone. After dating someone for a long time, it’s easy to slip into a stable and comfortable routine. While this can be comforting, when it happens you often lose the spark that made your relationship so special in the first place. Does this mean you can’t ever get those special feelings back? Of course not. Here are five simple, fun and creative ways to reignite that magic.

Give Your Partner A Unique Gift

Name a star after your partner. A number of astronomical agencies allow individuals to name stars and you receive formal documentation identifying the star that you have named.

Or how about this: Give your partner a magic gift box, and every month place a new small gift in the box for your beloved to discover. Your partner will never know when there’s going to be something sweet and special for her to find!

Say “I Love You” In A Unique Way

Take a book that your partner is reading and, using a pencil, underline letters in a section of the book she has yet to read to spell out a secret message of “I love you” or an entire love letter. Doing it just like this. Or for something really unique: You can buy special plants that grow and after 14 days display a message of your choice on the leaf. Cool or what?!?

Start Going On Dates Again

One thing that separates couples with ‘out of this world’ relationships, is they never stop doing new, fun and exciting things with their partner. In other words, they never stop dating and neither should you.

Spend the day doing fun things: go to the carnival, the beach, have a water fight, stare at the clouds on a grassy hill, go on a picnic, walk in the rain without raincoats and umbrellas, dress up in funny costumes and hit the town.

Or how about this: Pick your partner up for a date and blindfold her before driving to a special destination. Try to make the destination something really unexpected like a table set up at the top of a cliff or a dinner on a boat or old-fashioned ship. It needs to be something that will have an impact when she removes the blindfold.

Believe me when I say that NOTHING can rekindle the love, passion and excitement in your relationship more than going on fun and creative dates together.

Have Sex Like The First Time

What was so great about the first time you and your partner had sex? What makes first time sex amazing is that everything is new and there’s no rush in discovering it. Everything is unexpected and surprising. Create that feeling again with your partner by focusing a lot more on foreplay and kissing.

After you’ve reached “home base” and have already had sex with your lover, that’s usually where you’re headed when you start getting intimate. However, when you and your partner first got together, there was no rush to get past giving your partner oral sex or receiving a blowjob in return because simply, that’s as far as you had gotten and you weren’t thinking about what was coming next.

Focusing a lot more on kissing and making out with your lover (as well as spending a lot more time on foreplay) will make her feel like you’re having sex for the first time again. Don’t assume that just because you’ve gotten to 4th base before that you will again. Treat each sensation as though it were all new all over again. Your lover will pick up on your attitude pretty quick!

Kiss Her Like You Don’t Have Anything Else On Your Mind

Sometimes kissing doesn’t have to lead to sex – in fact, kissing your partner should not lead to sex much more often than it does! If you’re holding out on kissing your lover until you’re ready to get it on, you may be robbing your relationship of the romance.

Kiss your partner just to kiss her – before she goes to work, when she gets home and before you go to bed. Make each kiss special and make her feel as though you have nothing more on your mind in that moment than how great it is to kiss her.

Top 3 Ways to Increase Romantic Intimacy

By leejenkins

Romance is an essential part of every relationship. While partners are very intimate during the first few months of relationship, they tend to slowly drift apart over time. The changes are too slight to be noticeable, but soon, you will find yourself wondering why your partner does not act playful around you anymore. Moreover, she may be dodging talks about having sex and comes up with so many excuses when you make it clear that you’re in the mood.

There are several ways to improve your intimacy, so don’t make an appointment with a therapist yet. Married or not, couples need to do something about their situation first before seeking the help of a pro.

Set a Cuddle Time

You girl might feel wary about sudden shows of intimacy, especially if she’s often not in the mood to make love. She might think that you’re just feeling horny, that’s why you’re extra sweet or extra touchy. Women feel pressured to perform, especially if they notice that you just want to do it for your own release, and you don’t seem to care whether or not she gets hers. In a long-term relationship, it gets more and more difficult to set the mood for love making, especially if you and your partner have issues.

What you can do is to be content with just cuddling. Ask her to just cuddle and fall asleep like that together. Doing this a few times will increase intimacy tremendously. Soon, she will start to relax and get rid of the thought that you’re cuddling her so that you can get some that night even if she isn’t in the mood. Soon, she will start to want it whenever you’re acting romantic.

If you cannot help but feel the urge while you’re cuddling, you can wedge a small pillow between your legs so that you’re not inadvertently poking her and destroying the mood in the process.

Be Sexually Honest

Sexual honesty means telling your partner that her technique is not bringing you closer to orgasm, but gently. Instead of doing a full critique of her blowjob technique, guide her hand or give her instructions then reward her with moans.

While it is in bad form to constantly ask your partner if what you’re doing feels good, you must listen to what her body is telling you. Don’t get caught up in the act and simply assuming that everything you do feels good.

Buy Each Other Underwear

One definitive proof that you’re intimate is if you give each other underwear. Say you passed by a nice shop and saw a good bikini-style undergarment that you think she will like. Encourage her to choose an intimate apparel for you when she asks you what you want for Christmas. Besides the fact that she’s likely to wear your gift and show you, the thought that you were picturing how she would look in it while you’re in the lingerie shop is sexy.

These tips are just hints on what intimate activities you can do together to improve your relationship. Intimacy is the foundation of a long-term love affair, so make sure you have a lot of it in your relationship.