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5 “Hacks” Online Dating Websites Are Terrified You’ll Find Out

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Between you and me, online dating is a hoax.

No, I don’t mean you can’t meet ladies online. In fact, you can meet so many girls online, you can have a full time sex life without ever leaving your house! I mean the companies who own online dating sites have a dirty secret: They’d like you to fail over and over again. Because they want to make sure you are frustrated, so they can bill your credit card.

In this article, you’ll discover 5 “hacks” you can use to dramatically increase your success in online dating. You’ll find out how they’re trying to keep you down. And you’ll discover how to show online dating sites who’s boss:

The Perfect Profile Picture

Ever wonder what the perfect online dating profile picture is? Well, it’s not the 6-pack pic (studies show most females aren’t into guys with 6 packs, strangely enough). And it’s none of the pictures that show how rich or powerful you are. (They’re the worst kind of bragging)

INSTEAD, it’s a secret picture no sane man would ever think to use: The sleeping picture!

Here’s how you get it:

  • Have a friend take a picture of you while you’re sleeping
  • Then, add it in to your profile pictures (Not your main one, try making it picture three or four)
  • Watch your response to your messages shoot WAY up!

(It’s the quickest way to show your vulnerable side)

Why the online dating sites are hiding it from you:

I’ve got to give the online dating sites a break on this one – they actually have no clue. In fact, I discovered this secret a few years ago, myself. And I kept it to myself, until I decided to “retire” from online dating. So I guess technically I’ve been hiding it from you. Oops. However, those online dating sites don’t get off the hook!

They bombard you with pictures where girls fall for jacked, rich guys. In this case, they’re lying to you. Even though their research tells them the truth! (I stole the six pack study from a Match.com result)

Where To Find Smart, Sexy Chicks

Ever wonder where the ladies with brains AND beauty are hiding? Hint: You’ll never find them if you look through profiles. You’re going to get “booby blinded” and veer off course. The truth is, it’s impossible to tell whether a woman has a good personality or not when you look at her profile. Because she probably rewrote and edited it four or five times.

Turns out, most online dating sites have a section where men and ladies share their opinions about dating, sex and relationships. And these “forums” can be goldmines when you want to meet girls. In fact, just looking through posts can tell you loads about the woman who wrote them. (You may even find a woman you really like – a woman with a good head on her shoulders, and a pretty, curvy body to boot)

Why the online dating sites are hiding it from you:

In this case, it’s your own damn fault. Because survey after survey tells dating sites that forums are “nerdy,” so dating sites don’t promote them hard. Most dating sites don’t even link to their forums. You might have to dig through a few links to find these magical places.

So how can you cruise for smart, sexy chicks without looking like a nerd? It’s easy:

  • You find her profile on the forums
  • Then you send her a message “out of the blue,” like you stumbled across her profile in the search menu.
  • You reap the benefits of the forums without the social risk of posting on them. Genius!

(And for the record, I’m a total nerd. You can be nerdy and proud and still meet girls. You just want to keep your nerdy side in check until she’s falling for you. Then it’s cute, instead of nerdy.)

They’re Sabotaging Your First Message

A major feature on most online dating sites allows you to send a woman a “gift,” along with your message. They tell you this gift makes females respond to messages better. In fact, most sites give you a message format to follow.

They’re WRONG!

Do the exact opposite of what they recommend: Never include any “bribe” for reading your message, and keep your message short and to the point. Tell her, “Hey, I saw your profile and had to message you. Here’s why…” and then tell her what you liked about her and her profile. Finally, ask her a question so she can message you back.

Being honest like this works better than most online dating website’s template messages. (I’ll explain why in a later section)

Why the online dating website are hiding it from you:

It’s in their best interest. You see, most “gifts” cost something. Sometimes it’s a certain amount of “points” you get from being on their site. Sometimes it’s real, live cash money. Either way, these sites make money when you send gifts. Sometimes it’s your money and sometimes it’s advertising money.

Most Websites Hire Dozens Of “Fake” Women

Ever notice that six gorgeous girls with big breasts are just WAITING for you at whateversite.com? And they live right in your area, too! Lucky you, lucky you! Truth is, these ladies are called “plants.” Bigger dating sites use “Geolocation Tracking” to figure out which city you live in. Then, they’ll show you stock pictures and tell you these girls are waiting for

It’s a lie!

Instead of joining a website you haven’t seen for yourself:

  • Try a website like bugmenot.com
  • Use a trial password account
  • And check out the girls  there, for yourself
  • Only join if you see girls you like.

Why the online dating sites are hiding it from you:

Cold hard cash, baby.

They assume men want to meet HOT ladies online. We don’t surf online dating sites to meet average looking girls. So, to get you to sign up, they put “plants” in their ads. Even worse – most sites employ a few hundred “plant profiles.” Fake profiles with fake pics, designed to make you message them. They think once you send your first message, you can’t quit.

So if you don’t get a message back from that SUPER hot girl, you could have sent a bad message. Or you could have sent a message to a plant.

The Male/Female Ratio Secret

Think it’s some sort of cruel prank your messages never get returned? Even by girls who are average looking at best? Well the dating sites don’t tell you: The ratio of ladies to men is something like 1 woman for every 4 men. Why is this ratio so screwed up? Because a hot woman can meet men wherever she goes.

In fact, dozens of men approach HER for dates. So you’ll see less girls online dating than men. This means every woman is getting four times as many messages as her profile “deserves.” This makes your message “just one of a hundred.” Instead of something special or unique. To make her read your message, you gotta use some hacks: Make your messages look personal, and don’t hit on her right away.

Try using the subjectline: “Hey, noticed something about u…” Then use the message you learned in hack three.

Why the dating sites are hiding it from you:

Would you sign up for an online dating website if they told you “We have four times as many men as females!” Nope. Didn’t think so. You now have the tools to make online dating much, much easier. I can hear you thinking: “If only there were a way to “hack” real life dating, as well.”

Are Online Dating Sites Worthwhile?

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Though online dating services once held a certain stigma, they are now commonly used by hopeful relationship seekers. If you’ve been afraid to sign up for one, fearing that you’ll only meet antisocial geeks, you may be missing out. All sorts of people are finding boyfriends, girlfriends, and even future spouses online.

The Benefits Of Online Dating

So just what can online dating sites do for you that a singles’ bar can’t? For one thing, they simultaneously broaden and narrow your search. The site could find people that you wouldn’t otherwise run into in everyday life, casting a wider net for you. Yet it can also turn your focus toward people who share your interests, helping to eliminate unlikely candidates. That saves you time and ensures that you have a lot less first date fiascoes and more fourth and fifth dates and beyond.

You also have the ability to screen potential matches more easily, since you can study the person’s profile before you decide to respond to them. Online matchmaking services can be particularly helpful if you live in a large, highly populous area. It can be hard to navigate dating in a big city. Weeding your way through crowded bars and parties at your friends’ apartments can be daunting. Going online can help steer you toward the right people who desire the same kind of relationship that you do.

That’s something you can’t always tell when you first meet a cute guy or girl at your friend’s cook out. Just because someone seems like a good match, doesn’t mean they’re looking for something as serious as you are searching for. These same sites can also be really helpful for those who live in smaller towns. If you know everyone in town, but still haven’t found the right fit, using a dating site can help you find someone in a neighboring town that you don’t normally visit.

Are There Online Dating Dangers?

Of course, there are some dangers in using online matchmaking services, and you won’t necessarily find your dream date on the first try. It’s bad enough that people can misrepresent themselves in person, but online they can be even trickier. People can lie about their ages, their interests, and even their appearance. If you sense that a person’s profile isn’t totally truthful, or if they admit at some point that they fudged a few details, it’s best to pass over them.

A relationship based on lies can’t come to any good. That’s also why you have to be true to yourself when you put together your profile. If you twist your interests or information to make yourself seem more appealing, you’re not doing anyone any favors. The wrong kind of people are going to end up matched to you, and then they’ll be let down when they find out you weren’t totally honest. If you accurately describe yourself, you’ll draw the kind of people who will truly appreciate you for you. Finding the right match is what online dating is all about. Add it into your dating mix, and you just might find your perfect partner.

Online Dating: Taking It Offline – Meeting For The First Time

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Online dating seems easier than traditional dating at first, but that’s before you realize that at some point you’re going to have to take the relationship offline and into real life. You can’t have a relationship solely online – people crave intimacy and touch, whether it’s a hug, a face to face conversation or something more. If you’re really into someone you met through an online dating website, consider getting to know them in person. However, there are some safety tips to keep in mind for your first date! Here are 5 tips to help your first date go smoothly!

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Safety First!

When it comes to dating, it’s easy to let your hormones and emotions get in the way of making rational decisions. However, it’s important to remember that you really don’t know someone until you’ve had the first date and have hung out with them a few times. You may think you know them from the conversations that you’ve had through the online dating website, but your imagination will never fail to fill in the gaps and convince you that you know someone when you really don’t. Always keep safety in mind during online dating and hooking up with someone for the first time.

1. Meet In A Public Place. Always make your first date with someone you’ve met on the Internet in a public place during the day, where there are lots of other people around. This ensures that if your date was planning something sly, they definitely won’t try to pull it off in a public place during the day. If you meet someone online and they only want to meet up with you at night or in a place where not a lot of people go, you know what to do – kick them to the curb and look for someone else a little less shady.

2. Plan For A 30 Minute First Date. When making plans for your first time with someone in person, make it a short introduction at first to meet them and get acquainted with them. This isn’t where you’re going to really get to know them or learn all of their deep, dark secrets. You can still have a great relationship later on with someone, even if you didn’t spend hours talking to them on a magical first date. Set a time up to meet your date right before you have “something else you need to get to” and leave it at that. If the first date went poorly and you didn’t connect well with them, you’ll be glad you gave yourself the out ahead of time. If you do end up connecting with them, schedule another time to hook up when you have more time.

3. Tell A Friend. When going on a date for the first time with someone that you met through online dating, make sure you let a trusted friend know what is going on. Always tell your friend where you’re going, who you’ll be with, how long you’ll be gone and how to reach you while you’re there. If you turn up MIA, your friend will be able to contact the authorities right away before something really bad happens. While abductions and date rape during first dates are somewhat uncommon, don’t ever assume that it’s not going to happen to you. By taking a few simple precautions, you can be sure you won’t end up one of the statistics.

4. Check In With Your Friend. After your first date is over, make sure you check in with your friend. Let them know you’re safe and sound so they won’t worry about you – or worse, contact the authorities when it is completely uneccessary. Always take these two steps the first few times you go somewhere with someone that you met online dating.

5. Never Meet Alone. It may seem harmless, but you never want to meet someone for the first date at their home, a hotel or motel room or anywhere at night. This can be very dangerous! Again, if someone only wants to meet you at these places, they’ve probably got something up their sleeve.

When To Practice Online Dating Safety Tips

It may be difficult, but you always want to take these precautions for the first three or four dates, or longer if you’re not completely comfortable with someone yet. You’ll generally get an idea of whether someone is “for real” or not over the first few dates. If they’re making stuff up or being shady, it’s not going to take you very long to figure it out and move on to someone who isn’t wasting your time. Don’t ever go on a first date with someone you met online without taking a few safety precautions because you think nothing bad will happen to you. If something bad goes down, you’ll really wish you had. The best way to have fun is to stay safe!

Online Dating – How To Tell The Real Deal From A Total Fake

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Here’s the thing with online dating and chat lines – some people are honest, and really want to find their mate, while others are there only to mess with people or worse – hurt them in some way. It’s better to play it safe when dating online, but it can be difficult to know if the person you’re dating has ulterior motives or not. Here’s how you can know for certain!

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Always Trust Your Dating Instincts

Your dating instincts are the most powerful tool at your disposal for spotting a bad online dating profile or to tell if someone is lying to you. You definitely don’t want to underestimate your gut feelings and do something that the little voice in the back of your head is telling you not to do. If your gut is telling you that there’s something fishy going on, don’t ignore it!

Online dating can be especially challenging because your brain fills in the things you don’t know – with how you want the other person to be. You may be tempted to ignore the alarm bells that are going off because he or she is saying everything right, but if you sense that something isn’t right, it probably isn’t. They be really sweet, caring and seem perfect, but if your instinct is telling you to run, do it. There are other sweet, awesome people that you will meet online that won’t make you feel weird.

Keep An Eye Out For Lies

When dating online, keep an eye out for inconsistencies in their stories. Liars will almost always get tripped up in their lies, especially if they lie often. It’s often hard to keep lies straight, so the man or woman you’re dating may say one thing one time and say something completely different another time without even knowing it. If he says he hates football when you first talk to him and later he says he has to get to a game (or watch a game), that’s probably just the surface of the lies he’s telling you.

Keep an eye out for conflicting information about looks, hobbies, habits, friends, etc. Also, don’t be afraid to call them out on something that you’re not sure about – remember, you don’t them anything. You barely know them! If you come across an inconsistency in something they’ve said or done, speak up. Ask them about it. If they get flustered and can’t provide a good answer for you as to why they said one thing and did another (or whatever the situation may be), then you’ve probably caught them in a lie.

If It Sounds Too Good To Be True, It Usually Is

It’s hard to keep your ground when you’re being swept off your feet, but if the relationship seems too good to be true, it often is. It’s important to try to keep a level head when dating online or over a chat line, because if it seems like you’ve suddenly met Mr. or Mrs. Right and everything in your life is falling into place, you’re probably falling too hard for something that is definitely too good to be true.

A total fraud will try their absolute best to woo you, and if you’ve been looking for love for quite some time, it can be hard to resist someone who is doing and saying all of the right things. It’s important to stay vigilant when dating though, because something that seems perfect probably isn’t. A fake is probably working very hard to get you into their good graces so they can achieve whatever their goal is – whether that’s simply yanking people around or luring them into a trap that could cause you to end up in some very dangerous situations.

Try your best to keep your cool when you’re chatting online and don’t get too wrapped up in sweet phrases or gestures. Accept the niceties gracefully, but always keep your “weirdness radar” on so you can spot red flags right away. If the guy or girl you’re dating online seems totally perfect for you, take it with a grain of salt until they prove they are the real deal. Consider taking it offline, but make sure you take some safety precautions first such as meeting in public the first several times and letting a friend know where you’re going, who you’re going to be with and when you’ll be back. Once your date proves their motives are pure, you can relax (a little!)

Online Social Networking Etiquette For Couples

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Facebook, Myspace, and other online social networks have become an integral part of our social and dating experience in recent years. Their use is ubiquitous, particularly among twenty- and thirty-somethings, yet they’re still fairly new mediums. That being the case, it can sometimes be difficult to decide what is and isn’t appropriate to discuss and post on these sites. When you change your status to “In a Relationship,” what counts as over-sharing, and what could be detrimental to your romance’s success? You’re putting your relationship out into the public eye, so it’s absolutely necessary to think before you type.

You Can’t Take Back What Is In Print

There are two hugely important things to remember about what you post online—everyone you’ve listed as a friend can read or see it, and it’s now officially in print. That means that you can’t take it back as easily as you could if you just said something in person. If you say something embarrassing about your significant other, post a picture that they’d prefer remain private, or something else that could similarly upset them, you can take it down after the fact. However, most people you know have already seen it. That’s an argument waiting to happen, no question. It’s probably best that you check in with your girlfriend or boyfriend before posting anything that directly involves them, and if you even remotely suspect they might be upset by it, just don’t do it. Additionally, remember that certain things you post will be visible to your significant other’s online friends, which could include their family members. The fear of your girlfriend’s mom reading that you think her butt is hot should be reason enough to keep things clean.

Don’t Argue With Your Partner Online

You should also always remember that Facebook and Myspace are not appropriate forums for arguing with your significant other. Not only will you make all of your online friends feel incredibly uncomfortable (no one likes to bear witness to other people’s disagreements), but once things calm down, it will be horribly embarrassing for you and your partner. Now other people know all about the dark side of your relationship. Furthermore, there can be legal implications down the line—some divorce lawyers are actually starting to use comments and posts from social networking sites as fodder in custody battles and settlements. This is a good reminder, yet again, that once things are in print, they can come back to bite you.

Don’t Be Overly Mushy Online

So what if you don’t argue online or post unflattering pictures of your S.O.? What else is there to worry about online? Believe it or not, posting too many positive or mushy remarks can be equally un-cool. If you’re posting on your mate’s wall once a day about how much you love them, you’re opening yourself and your relationship up to judgment from your online friends. Most people aren’t going to see that and just think that you’re the most romantic couple ever. They’re going to wonder if you’re making such a big deal publicly because things aren’t going so hot behind the scenes. Additionally, there’s just an element of the annoying to this behavior. You should be telling your significant other that you love them on a daily basis in person, not online. Someone’s Facebook wall isn’t an inbox, either—if you need to ask your spouse to pick up some milk or want to tell them about your day at work, do it over the phone or in an email. In general, don’t post anything on your girlfriend or boyfriend’s wall that you wouldn’t post on a regular friend’s wall, and you’ll be just fine in love and online.