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Sex Toys: How To Keep Them Clean And Safe

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Sex toys can get nasty if you don’t take care of them and keep them clean. Also, some sex toys contain harmful chemicals. Here’s how to keep your favorites like new – and safe for you!

What Are Phthalates?

You may have heard of phthalates – these are dangerous chemicals that can be found in some rubbers and plastics that have been shown to be carcinogenic (cancer causing). Some sex toys also have phthalates in them, namely products that are made of jelly rubber. If you’ve ever opened a brand new product and it smelled of chemicals or had a strong plastic smell, you were probably smelling the phthalates in the rubber.

Does My Sex Toy Have Phthalates?

Most hard plastic vibrators and the like do not contain phthalates, and some jelly feeling products are made from silicone, so the only way to know for sure is to read the packaging and manual that came with your product and find out what it is made of. Some sex toys that do have phthalates aren’t going to necessarily advertise that they do, so if you suspect that your product does contain these chemicals and there’s no information in the packaging to suggest otherwise, you’ll want to assume that it does and take measures to stay safe.

If you’re purchasing a new sex toy or selecting your first one, finding one that is made without phthalates is actually very easy. Glass sex toys, hard plastic vibrators, wood, ceramic, metal and silicone sex toys are all phthalate free. A simple Internet search will reveal tons of phthalate free products for you to choose from.

Using A Condom With Your Vibrator

It’s a huge bummer to find out that your favorite sex toy is made with phthalates. It’s given you orgasm after orgasm and it works like a charm – but should you throw it out? Perhaps, but you don’t necessarily have to. Most people don’t think to use condoms during masturbation – since you’re not really risking getting pregnant or contracting STD’s – but condoms can actually help protect you from dangerous chemicals found in some sex toys.

The next time you’re getting ready to use your vibrator or dildo, slip a condom over it before inserting it into your vagina. This will help protect the delicate tissues inside the vagina from the chemicals. However, using a condom won’t protect you from any phthalates that are on the outside of the toy. For example, if you own a rabbit style vibrator, you can slip a condom over the dildo part of the toy, but you will still remain unprotected from the jelly covering on the vibrating clitoris attachment. All in all though, using a condom with sex toys that you suspect may contain dangerous phthalates significantly reduces your risk.

Using The Right Kind Of Lube

Not all lubricants are compatible with all sex toys. If you’re using the wrong lubricant with your products, you’re going to find that they degrade faster or become sticky, tacky or unusable in just a short amount of time. Finding the right lube to use with your product is essential if you want it to last longer.

Silicone: Silicone sex toys cannot be used with silicone lube. This will cause the material to degrade.

Hard Plastic: Can be used with any type of lube.

Wood: Can be used with any type of lube.

Latex: Cannot be used with oil based lube. Similarly, condoms cannot be used with oil based lube either.

Ceramic & Glass: Can be used with any type of lube.

Jelly Rubber: Best with water based lube, since jelly rubber can contain elements of latex and silicone.

In truth, water based lubricant is probably your best bet for any kind of sex toys. You don’t have to worry about buying different types of lube that are compatible with all your different kinds of products if you’re using a good water based lube. Water based lube is also a breeze to rinse off, unlike silicone or oil based lubricants.

Cleanup & Storage

When you’re using a condom with your sex toys, you can pretty much slip the condom off and store it right then and there. You might have to wipe it down some if things got really wild, but using a condom during masturbation actually helps make clean up faster.

If you’re not using a condom with your product, read the instructions to find out the manufacturer’s suggested cleaning methods. Most hard plastic toys can be wiped down with a damp cloth, while jelly rubber or latex products probably need a good soap and water bath to feel really clean.

You’ll always want to clean your products immediately after use. Sure, you may be spent after an incredible orgasm, however, you definitely don’t want to leave your toy sitting there for any length of time. This will cause it to grow bacteria and many sex toys are porous – meaning that the bacteria will actually absorb into the material of the product. This means your toys will retain odor and may never feel really “clean” again. Be safe and clean your products as soon as you’re done.

11 Ways To Get Your Girlfriend Back

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Talk is cheap and you need money to pay the rent – or a better way of stating it is you need to fill the hole in your heart that’s been left there after a breakup. It’s time to act rather than speak. What is it they say, “Actions speak louder than words.” She’s not taking your calls, so these are the type of things you need to do:

Leave Flowers & A Note In Her Car

If she drives her own car, leaving a red rose on her windscreen with a hand note from you explaining that you know words are cheap and that you ask her to give you a chance to show her why the two of you are meant to be together. You need to leave a little hint of a proposed romantic rendezvous that gives enough information to show your sincerity but not too much so as to create an allure.

Leave Flowers Or A Gift On Her Doorstep

If she has moved out and is living with a friend/sister or parents, make sure that you do the same but leave it on her/their doorstep at a time you know she will definitely find it.

Don’t Give Her A Chance To Rethink

Ensure you have set the romantic date for the following evening (which you have planned well in advance) so that she does not have time to get 100 negative input ideas from over-protective friends and family.

Make Sure You Look Good!

Deck yourself out in the most attractive NEW clothes you can find, have a haircut, shave and use an aftershave she cannot resist.

Surprise Her With A New Place

Choose a restaurant that you two have never been to, that is extremely romantic, make sure you book the secluded corner table, even ask for a separate dining room/area if possible and arrive EARLY.

Treat Her Like A Queen

When she gets to the table (which she will if you have done what we tell you), then make sure you stand up as she approaches and treat her like a queen, pulling out her chair, and after you sit down, look at her, drink her in and hold her eyes with yours as you tell her how exceptionally beautiful she looks. Before she can scoff at her compliment (which she might view as a superficial compliment), rise from you chair, get down to eye level next her while she is seated in her chair and put your finger gently on her lips and ask her to just listen to what you have to say before she responds.

Explain Yourself – And Apologize

Staying where you are, you tell her how much she means to you, what a complete idiot you have been, how having her gone has left a hole greater than all the black holes in space, in your life. Tell her you are prepared to do anything and keep on doing anything for as long as it takes, even your entire lifetime, to prove this to her.

Kiss Her The Right Way

When you leave alone that night (a must in this case), ask her permission to kiss her and then kiss her with hedonistic ferocity that leaves her hungry for more, then gently pull back.

Be A Gentleman

Make sure she has a ride home, whether with you, a cabby or walk her to her car, like a gentleman.

Send A Follow Up Text

When you get home, text her telling her how much you enjoyed the evening, tell her how beautiful she looked and that you can’t wait to see her again.

Don’t Let Things Sit For Too Long

Follow up and confirm your next date and don’t leave it too long. There is a reason they call it the “art” of seduction. It involves creativity, patience and time.

6 Signs He’s Addicted To Sex

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Sex is on every man’s mind pretty much all the time. But how can you tell when he’s crossed the line? Here are six dead giveaways that he’s an addict.

He Talks About Sex At Inappropriate Times

Even though men think about doing the nasty almost all the time, most men know when to keep their mouths shut about it. Most men aren’t going to try to hold a discussion about sex positions over the dinner table, but a man who is addicted to sex might not find anything wrong with this scenario. If he’s bringing up the topic of sex at really inappropriate times, such as at your parent’s house (in front of your parents) or during business meetings, he might be an addict.

Even if he doesn’t necessarily start talking about the amazing anal sex you had last night at a luncheon, he might still be an a addict if the subject of getting it on makes its way into his conversations often. These conversations may be reserved for you or his friends, but if that’s all he seems to be able to talk about with you, it could be a signal that he can’t stop thinking about doing it for more than a few minutes at a time.

He Watches Porn For Hours A Day

Often, men who are addicts will relieve themselves through watching porn and masturbating. All men masturbate – and most of them watch porn while they’re doing it – but that doesn’t mean that all guys are obsessed with getting it on. Normally, a man might only need to watch a dirty flick for several minutes before finishing the job, but a man with an addiction to sex may watch porn for hours at a time or several times a day.

He Needs To Masturbate Often In Addition To Frequent Sex

Even if a man has sex often with his partner, he’s still going to masturbate on the side. There’s nothing women can do about that and it’s completely natural. However, a man who is obsessed with it is going to go overboard on both counts – he’s going to be masturbating and having intercourse daily or even several times a day.

Even if you and your partner are having great intercourse daily, if he’s addicted to it, you may find him masturbating on the side as often as you have intercourse or perhaps even more. Most men are able to reach a point where they feel sexually satisfied and aren’t driven to have intercourse or masturbate, but men who are addicted to doing the dirty aren’t ever going to get to that “satisfied” place.

The Need For Sex Interrupts His Daily Life

As with any addiction, it becomes a true addiction when it begins to interrupt a person’s daily life. Is your partner adjusting his schedule to make time for more sex or masturbation? Is he late to functions because of intercourse or masturbation? Does he fail to make plans with his family or friends because he’d rather stay home and get it on or masturbate instead? These are all symptoms of a serious addiction. If you find that your partner’s need for sexual release is interfering with his life or your relationship, it may be time to seek help for his addiction.

He Cheats On You

For some addicts, sex with one partner and frequent masturbation isn’t even enough. He may begin to seek sexual release from other partners, especially if the opportunity presents itself. This is in part due to never feeling truly satisfied sexually, but also because getting it on is literally at the forefront of his thoughts all the time. A man who is addicted will have a difficult time looking at a woman and not associating her with sex in some form or fashion.

He Pressures You To Have Sex

A true addict really doesn’t like hearing “no” when it comes to getting it on. Some men who are really addicted to sex can be involved with rape or date rape, but most aren’t. However, a man that has a problem might put more pressure on a woman to have sex with him than an ordinary man would.

Your man might be an addict if he pressures you constantly to get busy with him, or doesn’t listen to you when you say “no.” If you’re constantly having to thwart his advances – especially at inappropriate times – consider seeking help for your partner for an addiction.

How To Become A Sex Superstar

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Sex can be many things – it can be incredible, but it can also be mediocre. Don’t settle for less than the best – here’s how to turn yourself into a sex bomb!

Build Your Confidence

Confidence is the number one thing you need to have in your arsenal. Nothing else is as effective at feeling good about yourself and seducing others as confidence is. Instead of standing in front of a mirror picking out your flaws, check yourself out.

Point out things that you love about yourself, whether it’s something about the way you look or something about who you are. Learn to love yourself and be confident in the real you, and show the real you to other people. You’ll be surprised at what a difference it really makes.

Dress To Kill

Clothes and appearances are overrated, right? Sometimes. However, looking your best will naturally boost your confidence and will also make you more attractive and noticeable to others. So splurge on that dress you were eyeing the other day, or spend ten extra minutes curling your hair. Put a little more effort into the way you look and make sure you’re looking – and feeling – fabulous every time you walk out the door. If you know you look amazing, you’re going to exude confidence and sex to everyone around you and you’ll literally be a walking bombshell!

Explore Your Own Sexuality

Being a bombshell when it comes to sex isn’t about waiting for your partner to figure out the right “buttons” to push to give you pleasure. It’s about taking control of your own pleasure and learning what you like and what you don’t like on your own. Don’t expect a guy to find your g-spot, your clitoris or any other hot spot of yours if you haven’t bothered to find it first.

Masturbation is the best way for women to discover how they like to be touched and what works best to bring them to orgasm during nookie. If you don’t have a sex toy, now is the time to get one. Splurge on a high quality vibrator or other sex toy and lock the doors and dim the lights. Take charge of your own pleasure and explore your sexuality. Learn what you like and what you don’t like, so you can confidently communicate to any partner what you want while doing the dirty.

Learn To Please Your Partner

A sex vixen not only knows what she wants during sex, she also knows how to please her partner. You may think you know all there is to know about getting it on and how to give a guy an orgasm, but chances are, you’re not as well informed as you think. While a guy is pretty much guaranteed a climax if he’s doing it with a woman – heck, all it takes is a little lotion and his hand anyways – but there are ways to make your partner literally explode with pleasure if you take the time to learn the sex techniques that will blow him out of the water.

Take some time to check out a few tips and techniques to give your man an earth shattering blowjob or even how to use prostate massage to intensify his climax. Learn to do things that no other girl has ever done before, and practice them until you get really good. Your guy will love that you’re interested in doing new things, but he’ll also love the learning process! Make sure you have a few tricks up your sleeve for the next time you get it on.

Don’t Be Afraid To Try New Things

A sex vixen isn’t afraid to try new things in – or out – of the bedroom. This, in part, is due to having confidence. A woman who has confidence in herself, the way she looks and the ability to please herself and her partner isn’t going to be scared to bring out some new sex toys or to try new sex positions in the bedroom.

Constantly think about new things you can try with your partner, even if it’s only a little different from things that you’ve done before. It doesn’t matter what you do – it could be as simple as tugging his scrotum lightly during a blowjob if you’ve never done it before. As long as you’re constantly looking for new ways to please your partner and yourself, you’re going to evolve into a sex vixen in no time.

How To Make Meeting Your S.O.’s Family Successful

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Relationship advice is going to come in handy if you’re meeting your partner’s family for the first time. Here are some tips to make it go smoothly.

Whether you’re meeting your boyfriend/girlfriend’s parents for the first time, or going to your tenth holiday dinner at your in-laws’ place, interacting with your significant other’s family can be one of the most complex parts of your relationship. If you’re willing to be patient and make compromises, you’ll have an easier time with your new relatives-by-proxy.

Spending Time With In-Laws Can Be Stressful

There are two little words that can strike massive fear in the hearts of many men and women: in-laws. Spending time with your significant other’s family can be one of the most strange and stressful parts of your relationship. Unless your partner is a recent orphan, however, you’re not going to get out of family time. The best you can do is learn how to cope with them – while still being yourself and being confident.

If it’s the first time you’re meeting your significant other’s family members, there are a few ways to better prepare yourself. First of all, talk to your partner about his or her relatives – this is probably the best where your best relationship advice comes from because a little research about who these people really are can go a long way. You shouldn’t put up a front, but it is good to adjust yourself slightly to their expectations.

If they’re not big drinkers, don’t show up with a bottle of wine. If they traditionally dress up for dinner, trade in your jeans for a dress or slacks. Think of it like visiting a foreign country; you don’t want to look like a tourist, so you take a few tiny steps to fit in with the locals. This will also endear you to your mate, because he or she will be flattered that you care about impressing the parents.

Will You Fit In With Their Family?

What if, once you’ve met them, you find you don’t fit in at all? If you’re married, engaged, or moving in together, you won’t be able to avoid the in-laws forever. That means you need to strategize appropriately. Try to plan family gatherings that have set end times, so your visits won’t be painfully long. Look for the one or two things you do have in common and focus on them.

If you and your in-laws both love old movies, host a classic movie night at your place. They’ll feel welcomed and loved, and you won’t have to talk to them much during the movie. Have excuses at the ready to cut awkward drop-in visits short or omit awkward silences without being impolite. For instance, if your mother-in-law drops by on a Sunday afternoon and just won’t leave, tell her you hate to end your visit, but you have to run errands before dinner time.

Then plan for one of those aforementioned movie nights so she knows you’re not adverse to spending time with her. When it comes to the holidays, make sure that you and your partner set ground rules early on in your relationship. Every three years is a good rule—one year with your family, the next with your significant other’s family, and the third year to yourselves. That makes both sets of in-laws feel like they’re being treated fairly.

What To Do If It Gets Awkward

Of course, sometimes relations with your partner’s family go beyond awkward unpleasantness and become strained. Maybe you hate being around your spouse’s parents because they have strong political beliefs that oppose yours, or maybe the situation is worse.

If Aunt Jean is a bigot and insults you to your face because you’re not the same race as she is, then you don’t have to put up with that. You can and should cross her off the family game night invite list. If you find that you’re the lone Democrat in a sea of diehard Republicans, avoid the topic of politics like the plague. If it still gets brought up, you can either sit back and quietly observe or suggest a subject change.

In the end, in-laws are a fact of life in long term relationships. You don’t have to enjoy every moment of it, but you can improve upon your time with them. Above all, remember that these folks are your significant other’s family. Like them or not, your mate loves them. You owe it to her or him to make lemonade from these familial lemons. Besides, don’t forget—he or she has to deal with your family, too!