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Friend Zone Damage Control

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When dating, beware of the “Friend Zone” – we have all been in it, and it sucks. Despite all the glorious positions you can be in with a women, there is one that no man wants to be in. When placed in it by a woman, you lose all romantic interest in her eyes. You become a sexual non-entity with the arousing powers of her own brother, or a lampshade. Once you’re there, she’s not going to be interested in dating you.

As you gain more experience with women, you will find yourself in the friend zone less and less and will learn many ways to preemptively stop yourself from winding up in it. However, that is not what I am going to get into with this article. Instead I am going to share some ways that you can remove yourself once being placed in it.

Be Willing To Lose The Friendship

The first step to getting out of the friend zone is that you have to be willing to lose her completely. One thing I have learned in my years managing relationships with women is that two people who are platonic don’t sleep with each other. You will not be able to go after her if you are afraid to lose her, doing so will only plant you deeper in it. So what’s the most important step?

Make Yourself Less Available

One of the main reasons you probably got placed in the friend zone in the first place (instead of dating her) is because you made yourself overly available. You constantly made plans to hang out with her without making a move. The longer you hang out with a girl without hooking up, the higher the chance you will be placed in it. So what do you do? Get away from her. Distance yourself and for a little bit stop making an effort to hang out with her. If she is a real “friend” she should be making an effort to hang out with you. You’re soon going to realize that she probably won’t be setting up a time to hang out anytime soon.

As time goes by she will become in touch with you. If not, you can slowly re-engage but this time with a different approach. For example, do not be her therapist. Do not give her advice for how to deal with her problems. If you need listen, only do so mockingly. You are no longer a shoulder to cry on and have no need to feel sorry for her problems. She is a big girl, she will figure it out.

Keep Your Options Open

In the mean time you should be talking to or dating other girls. Not to make her jealous, but to create other opportunity for yourself. Only once you have emotionally removed yourself from the girl you are in the friend zone with, will she start chasing you. Also, this is a great time to work on staying out of it with new girls.

Time is beneficial to you here and use it to your advantage. I’m talking about going months without being in touch. It may seem harsh but if you want her that bad, this is what it takes.

After making yourself scarce to her you have opened up a window to change the frame of the relationship. Start sending her mixed signals by escalating touch and showing interest in dating her. Do not be afraid to start flirting with her. You have not talked to her for a while, you want to come back seeming like a different, more sexual person.

Change Your Goals

You want to be coming from the mindset that you want her, but it does not matter if you get her. Remember, you can’t be afraid to lose her. In fact if you are doing any of this to just try and “get her,” it is not going to work. Stop trying to get her. It may take a few months to get out of the mindset where you are trying to be the guy for her, but only then will you be able to start dating her. And at that point it is up to you to decide if you really want her.

If you honestly have a strong friendship with a girl and you really don’t want to ruin it with dating, then you need to accept you will never hook up with her. But you need to ask yourself, is your spending time with her just another hope for you to hook up out of some miracle, or is for your own enjoyment. Remember, people who are platonic don’t sleep together. But if they do, they can become friends that have sex.

More On Getting Out Of The Friend Zone:

  • You have to be willing to say no to her.
  • You can ask her advice about a girl you are seeing, but more importantly talk about the sexual aspect of it. Make her see you as a someone who enjoys sex.

If you are someone that finds yourself getting into the friend zone, say things along these lines when just getting to know a girl:

  • “I speak my mind and it can sometimes get me in trouble, but that’s just who I am.”
  • “Don’t play games cause you won’t be able to keep up with me; honesty is what I am attracted to.

5 “Hacks” Online Dating Websites Are Terrified You’ll Find Out

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Between you and me, online dating is a hoax.

No, I don’t mean you can’t meet ladies online. In fact, you can meet so many girls online, you can have a full time sex life without ever leaving your house! I mean the companies who own online dating sites have a dirty secret: They’d like you to fail over and over again. Because they want to make sure you are frustrated, so they can bill your credit card.

In this article, you’ll discover 5 “hacks” you can use to dramatically increase your success in online dating. You’ll find out how they’re trying to keep you down. And you’ll discover how to show online dating sites who’s boss:

The Perfect Profile Picture

Ever wonder what the perfect online dating profile picture is? Well, it’s not the 6-pack pic (studies show most females aren’t into guys with 6 packs, strangely enough). And it’s none of the pictures that show how rich or powerful you are. (They’re the worst kind of bragging)

INSTEAD, it’s a secret picture no sane man would ever think to use: The sleeping picture!

Here’s how you get it:

  • Have a friend take a picture of you while you’re sleeping
  • Then, add it in to your profile pictures (Not your main one, try making it picture three or four)
  • Watch your response to your messages shoot WAY up!

(It’s the quickest way to show your vulnerable side)

Why the online dating sites are hiding it from you:

I’ve got to give the online dating sites a break on this one – they actually have no clue. In fact, I discovered this secret a few years ago, myself. And I kept it to myself, until I decided to “retire” from online dating. So I guess technically I’ve been hiding it from you. Oops. However, those online dating sites don’t get off the hook!

They bombard you with pictures where girls fall for jacked, rich guys. In this case, they’re lying to you. Even though their research tells them the truth! (I stole the six pack study from a Match.com result)

Where To Find Smart, Sexy Chicks

Ever wonder where the ladies with brains AND beauty are hiding? Hint: You’ll never find them if you look through profiles. You’re going to get “booby blinded” and veer off course. The truth is, it’s impossible to tell whether a woman has a good personality or not when you look at her profile. Because she probably rewrote and edited it four or five times.

Turns out, most online dating sites have a section where men and ladies share their opinions about dating, sex and relationships. And these “forums” can be goldmines when you want to meet girls. In fact, just looking through posts can tell you loads about the woman who wrote them. (You may even find a woman you really like – a woman with a good head on her shoulders, and a pretty, curvy body to boot)

Why the online dating sites are hiding it from you:

In this case, it’s your own damn fault. Because survey after survey tells dating sites that forums are “nerdy,” so dating sites don’t promote them hard. Most dating sites don’t even link to their forums. You might have to dig through a few links to find these magical places.

So how can you cruise for smart, sexy chicks without looking like a nerd? It’s easy:

  • You find her profile on the forums
  • Then you send her a message “out of the blue,” like you stumbled across her profile in the search menu.
  • You reap the benefits of the forums without the social risk of posting on them. Genius!

(And for the record, I’m a total nerd. You can be nerdy and proud and still meet girls. You just want to keep your nerdy side in check until she’s falling for you. Then it’s cute, instead of nerdy.)

They’re Sabotaging Your First Message

A major feature on most online dating sites allows you to send a woman a “gift,” along with your message. They tell you this gift makes females respond to messages better. In fact, most sites give you a message format to follow.

They’re WRONG!

Do the exact opposite of what they recommend: Never include any “bribe” for reading your message, and keep your message short and to the point. Tell her, “Hey, I saw your profile and had to message you. Here’s why…” and then tell her what you liked about her and her profile. Finally, ask her a question so she can message you back.

Being honest like this works better than most online dating website’s template messages. (I’ll explain why in a later section)

Why the online dating website are hiding it from you:

It’s in their best interest. You see, most “gifts” cost something. Sometimes it’s a certain amount of “points” you get from being on their site. Sometimes it’s real, live cash money. Either way, these sites make money when you send gifts. Sometimes it’s your money and sometimes it’s advertising money.

Most Websites Hire Dozens Of “Fake” Women

Ever notice that six gorgeous girls with big breasts are just WAITING for you at whateversite.com? And they live right in your area, too! Lucky you, lucky you! Truth is, these ladies are called “plants.” Bigger dating sites use “Geolocation Tracking” to figure out which city you live in. Then, they’ll show you stock pictures and tell you these girls are waiting for

It’s a lie!

Instead of joining a website you haven’t seen for yourself:

  • Try a website like bugmenot.com
  • Use a trial password account
  • And check out the girls  there, for yourself
  • Only join if you see girls you like.

Why the online dating sites are hiding it from you:

Cold hard cash, baby.

They assume men want to meet HOT ladies online. We don’t surf online dating sites to meet average looking girls. So, to get you to sign up, they put “plants” in their ads. Even worse – most sites employ a few hundred “plant profiles.” Fake profiles with fake pics, designed to make you message them. They think once you send your first message, you can’t quit.

So if you don’t get a message back from that SUPER hot girl, you could have sent a bad message. Or you could have sent a message to a plant.

The Male/Female Ratio Secret

Think it’s some sort of cruel prank your messages never get returned? Even by girls who are average looking at best? Well the dating sites don’t tell you: The ratio of ladies to men is something like 1 woman for every 4 men. Why is this ratio so screwed up? Because a hot woman can meet men wherever she goes.

In fact, dozens of men approach HER for dates. So you’ll see less girls online dating than men. This means every woman is getting four times as many messages as her profile “deserves.” This makes your message “just one of a hundred.” Instead of something special or unique. To make her read your message, you gotta use some hacks: Make your messages look personal, and don’t hit on her right away.

Try using the subjectline: “Hey, noticed something about u…” Then use the message you learned in hack three.

Why the dating sites are hiding it from you:

Would you sign up for an online dating website if they told you “We have four times as many men as females!” Nope. Didn’t think so. You now have the tools to make online dating much, much easier. I can hear you thinking: “If only there were a way to “hack” real life dating, as well.”

Flirting With Text Messages – 3 Texts A 3rd Grader Could Have Written

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You’ve been flirting with her through text messages, but with no response. Ever wonder why a woman didn’t text you back?

It’s not because your text message wasn’t “good enough.” Because texting shouldn’t be tough to do. In fact, your average third grader could write expert text messages. (As long as you arm him with some top notch psychology)

With that in mind, let’s take a look at three of my favorite text messages. They’re my favorites because they work. And they work on every woman. In this article, you’ll discover which texts they are, exactly when to send them, and how they use modern psychology to make getting sex easier.

“I just saw ur twin…”

That’s an easy enough text, right? It’s like you walk down the street and see a stranger who reminds you of your girl. So, you send her this text message. It may surprise you to discover this is one of the most powerful texts in the world (if you want her to text you back)

Let’s check it out in more detail:

Why it works:

Ever hear someone say, “No one cares about you as much as you do?” Whether you have or you haven’t, you understand the sentiment: Most people consider themselves important. They’re worried about making mistakes, being embarrassed and what other people think about them.

That gorgeous woman you know thinks exactly the same way. In fact, psychologists call this phenomenon the “ego.” A well known psychologist called the ego, “The most powerful motivating force in human nature.” Which means triggering it in a text message is a very good thing, for you.

“I just saw your twin” works on a few levels. It also brings up feelings of insecurity (“Was she pretty?”) and the promise of a good story (it makes her think, “What happened?”).

When you’d use it:

You can use this text message almost whenever. Even out of the blue. The rule of thumb is: You want to use this text when you’re starting a “new” conversation. For example, you haven’t texted each other for a few days… or maybe things “cooled off” for awhile.

It’s a great text message if she’s been ignoring your texts for awhile, too. I’ll explain why in just a second, after we check out this next text.

“Something just reminded me of u…”

This text also uses “ego” psychology. However, this text is special. Because it focuses on drama and the hint of a good story. And it also teases her with a compliment.

Why it works:

She’s HOPING you were reminded of how pretty she is or you were reminded of something funny she said. However, she’s afraid you’ll remember an embarrassing part of her. For example, maybe she forgot to leave a tip on your date, and you noticed someone being super cheap.

(Everyone has their insecurities.)

When you’d use it:

Any time you’d use “I just saw ur twin.” Which reminds me: These texts are great even when she ignores one or two of your texts in a row. It’s all because these texts are stories in themselves. Complete texts that INVITE her to text you back but don’t require her to.

So you keep your power in the relationship, even when you text her twice in a row. It’s a neat trick – and I suggest you use it more often.

“OMG u didn’t…”

This one plays on her ego and it also brings in a level of guilt: Have you ever done something wrong, but not gotten “caught?” The feeling of guilt stays with you for days – maybe even weeks. And you feel like everyone knows what you did. The good news is: You’re not alone.

Why it works:

Everyone has that feeling one time or another. In fact, most people carry around “guilt” feelings every single day. Especially women! (Ever wonder why your mother constantly gave you guilt trips?)

When you’d use it:

This text works especially well after a first date. Because, here’s a shocker, EVERYONE makes mistakes on a first date! She leaves your first date wondering if she did “OK,” just like you leave your first date, wondering the same thing.

(She wouldn’t be on a date with you if she didn’t like you a lot…)

So toss this text in after a first date, or even after the first time you meet. She’ll text you back, I promise 🙂

So there you have it…

As you can clearly see, a “great” text message is so easy, a third grader could write one. All you need is the right psychology. And now you’ve got the psychology down pat. So what now? How can you guarantee you’ll get a first date… a booty call… maybe even sex? How about a relationship, after the fact?

Well, just like these texts, dating can be VERY easy once you know the right psychology.

7 Sketchy Places To Meet Your Next Girlfriend

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When dating, finding new places to meet women is tough. Ever tell your friends how you met your last girlfriend? No? Neither have I. Not in too much detail, at least. Most of the time the story goes, “I met her at a bar” or “We were in the same class” or“W e work at the same office.”

But you should know, women OBSESS over these dating stories. They tell their girlfriends every little, tiny detail. And they share the story of the day you met with every single person they know. So, in this article, you’ll discover how to give her a damn INTERESTING story to tell.

PLUS – You’ll finally be able to tell YOUR friends a great dating story, with some funny details. (This story will easily get you tons of laughs)

“I Met Him While We Were Trapped 50 Feet Below Ground”

Creepy, right? Sounds like a love story straight from a horror movie. Truth is, this strange place to meet your next girlfriend was voted “The Most Romantic Place To Meet A Man” in a recent, 2010 survey done by a famous woman’s magazine.

And this place is…. the subway.

If you live in any major, metropolitan city, there are thousands of women waiting to meet and start dating you. And you see them every day, riding the subway. If you say the right things to her, it’s as if you walked straight out of her favorite romantic movie, and into her dreams.

Here are some tips:

  • Start with a compliment. This one works great: “I saw you and your energy seems so positive, I had to come talk to you.” (This works way better than complimenting her body or outfit)
  • Then ask an easy question: “Where are you headed?”
  • Finally, before you get off the train, tell her this: “I never meet anyone interesting on the subway. I’d love to get coffee with you, sometime.”
  • When she says yes, tell her you’ll call her, then get her phone number.

“I Met Him While We Were Surrounded By Dead Animals”

Another one of those horror dating stories, right? Wrong! Whether you’re a younger man who’s into cougars or you’re an older, career focused man who likes career focused women. This place is a perfect place for you to meet women.

And this is… The Grocery Store.

Specifically, the meat section. (Although the other sections will work, as well.) You shop for groceries. She shops for groceries. And between you and me, most of the time she looks sexy as hell doing it. You may as well TALK to the gorgeous women you meet at Whole Foods or Stop ‘n Shop, right? Especially if you’d like to be dating them!

Here’s how:

  • Walk up to her and give her a nice compliment, like before. Try: “Wow. You look like quite a cook.” (Works even better if you’re joking on her for buying microwave meals)
  • Start talking about things you like to cook. Move onto topics like activities you like to do. Just make small talk.
  • After a few minutes, tell her: “Hey, it was really great meeting you. Grocery shopping is usually such a chore. It was a pleasure to bump into you. I’d love to keep talking about X TOPIC sometime – do you drink coffee?”
  • If she says yes, get the number. If she says no, tell her you know this great tea place, then get the number.

It’s laid back. It’s full of romance. And it WORKS. Try it out, for yourself.

“I Met Him In The Middle Of A Pack Of Nerds And Geeks”

Before I started learning how to meet women, I spent most of my time obsessing over my job. (I worked in a physics lab, and had an B+ rating on ICCUP – a professional video game league) So you can believe me when I tell you: This super-nerdy place to meet women is a gold mine for women who are smart, intelligent, artistic and creative. It’s also an amazing place to meet cute, young college students.

How about… the library?

Surrounded by books, the library is super laid back and quiet. Women love the idea of dating someone seeing them for who they really are. And what’s more revealing than what she’s reading at the library? Nothing!

Try picking her up, like this:

  • Check out what she’s reading, and then ask her if she likes it.
  • If you’re in a quiet room, slip her a note. Ask her the same question above, but start it with one of the compliments we talked about, earlier. Try “You seem like you’ve got great taste in literature.”
  • That works even better if she’s reading something jokey – like a comic book or romance novel.
  • By now, you know the drill for getting her number. Make her feel special, then ask her if she likes coffee.

Chances are this woman is smart, educated and interesting in making something of herself. At the very least, she’s a reader. And if you’re a reader – you’re a good match.

“I Met Him 100 Feet Away From The Dungeons And Dragons Club”

Yet you’ll find all kinds of interesting women at this, particular place: From women who love to cook and clean, to women who are into economics and politics, even women obsessed with sexual improvement and tantra. Best of all, you can pick which “type” of woman you’d like to be dating as easily as walking just a few feet to your left or right.

Because it is…the bookstore.

And the book store has a whole different set of rules than the library. For one, you can talk, chat and mingle. For another, you can pick which type of woman you’d like to meet, based on what’s she’s reading or where she’s hanging out! Want a down to earth woman? Try the cooking sections. Want a sexually liberated woman? Try self-improvement.

In fact, here are three things to keep in mind, when meeting women at a book store:

  • Be respectful. She’s trying to read. So when you approach her, say “I don’t mean to interrupt, but…” and then go into your compliments from the library.
  • Don’t keep her too long. Have small, five minute conversations.
  • You can go on your first date, right then! Many book stores have coffee shops right in the lobby. So you can bring your new friend on a first date just a few minutes after you meet her. Ask her if she wants to grab coffee and keep talking. (And DON’T call it a first date!)

Once you’ve mastered the library and the book store, here are a few more “sketchy” places to meet your new girlfriend…

“I Met Him When He Woke Me Up From A Nap”

Sounds like you’re sitting in her bedroom, waiting for her to fall asleep, right? Wrong! Hell, you know this place like the back of your hand. (And I can GUARANTEE there’s one woman you’d like to meet here even if you’ve got a SUPER crush on some woman, right now)

What about the classroom….or your work?

Either or, it’s somewhere you spend most of your time. And the women there spend all day doing the same things, over and over, too. Not only will you know a bunch of the same people, you’ll also have at least ONE thing in common. (Which is a major turn on for most women!)

Here are the “rules” you need to know, before you start seriously dating a woman, at work (or school):

  • Keep it low key. Even when you’re out and out dating, keep your relationship in the down low. Let her tell people, when she’s ready. This way, you won’t screw things up, by accident.
  • Be subtle and gradual. This means you don’t ask her on a date, right away. Instead, invite her to grab a drink with you and a few of the guys. Then, at the end of the night, tell her you had fun talking to her and would like to grab lunch some day, while you’re working.
  • These small steps give you big returns because you’ll eventually get to a first date – even sex – without scaring her off along the way

“I Met Him While I Was Hot And Sweaty”

At this next place, you see athletic women where ever you look. Women wearing practically nothing, sunning themselves to get a tan. Women who are friendly, active and blessed with toned, tight, sexy bodies. That’s because you’re hanging out in…

A park!

It’s outdoors. It’s active. It’s fun for most people. And women you meet here are active, friendly and social. If you’re into working out or eating healthy, you’ll meet and possibly start dating) some amazing women here.

  • Take a second to break the ice and start flirting. Say, “I know this is kinda of awkward, but…” or “I know this is out of the blue, but…” and then follow it up with a compliment.
  • “I know this is out of the blue, but, I saw you running and I couldn’t take my eyes off of you. What’s your name?”
  • And as always, chat for a few minutes, then suggest grabbing some coffee. (Feel free to make a joke about not wanting to go now, because they’ll kick her out for being too sweaty)

“I Met Him While I Was Wrist Deep In Another Man’s Dough”

Yup. You read that right. In this area, there’s a good chance she’ll be buried wrist deep in another man’s dough. She’ll also be highly creative, very nurturing and one hell of a cook. (Plus, she’ll smell like warm cupcakes on a summer afternoon)

This place is… a baking or cooking class.

Oh man! If you’ve ever wanted to be SURROUNDED by women who are ALL “eyeing” you like you’re the hottest man she’s ever seen – a baking class is the place to be! You usually get to be partners with a few women who take care of themselves, are looking to improve themselves and are usually very, very sensual.

(They like to make things, smell things, and touch things. Sex with a woman who takes baking or cooking lessons is almost guaranteed to be a good time!)

So how do you find a good class to start dating women? And how would you meet women once you’re there? Here are the tips:

  • Try a class with cupcakes or other baked goods. Cupcakes are very “in style” right now, and will be for a few years to come – so you’ll meet hotter, “trendier” women than you would at, say, a local lasagna class.
  • Make sure you’re ACTIVE in making the baked goods! Take charge, give people jobs, delegate. Be the man they look to for what to do next.
  • Bring a girl friend. This one is the easiest – and most important – of all: Bring a girl who’s also your friend. You do this so the women will know you’re straight and they’ll fight with the other girl to date you.
  • (Honestly? Your girl friend gives you – a straight man – a reason to be at a cupcake class. The real reason? The women are hot and cupcakes are yummy… There’s really no mystery here)

Go alone and you’re risking an uphill battle. Not to mention, the girl friend you bring will get highly attracted to you, as well.

7 Ways To Get Laid By Being Just A Friend

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Think you can’t seduce a woman who’s just a friend, huh? Well that must suck, especially because the movies and TV make it out to be such a big deal. They say if you’re her friend, you’ll never be anything more than friends with her. Well I’m here to tell you that’s not the case.

In fact, it’s a bold faced lie.

And in this article, you’ll discover 7 seduction tips that show how being “just a friend” can HELP you turn your friendship into a sexual relationship. (Maybe you can even date her in the long run)

Be The Nicest Man She’s Ever Met

Boy, just reading that makes you feel like you’re less “sexy,” right? Well, you should know that women love “nice guys” – they just don’t like “weak men.” What’s the difference? Well a nice guy is someone who treats a woman right. Someone who makes her feel special, sexy and important.

And a “weak man” is a man who lets other people walk all over him.

But fear not! Because there are a few, very simple, very easy ways to show her that YOU are a nice guy, not a weak man:

  • When she says something you don’t agree with, don’t agree with her. This doesn’t mean you have to be a prick. Be nice, just don’t be afraid to say “no” or “I don’t agree with you” every once in awhile.
  • Tease her, and put her down lightly. You see, nice guys are afraid of ever hurting her feelings. So afraid, they never tease her or make fun of her at all. You should feel free to make fun of her funny mistakes, the same way your friends tease you when you accidentally leave the garage door open, for example. This type of “teasing” is extremely attractive to women. (An example: Oh man, you’re terrible at that. Nope, I’m never letting you do that, ever again.)
  • You don’t have to return her calls if you’re busy. For example, she calls and you’re playing video games with a friend, feel free to let the call go to voicemail. Don’t be afraid to take your “alone” time, she’ll understand.

Don’t Be Afraid To Be Romantic

Romance is another trait most nice guys have. Yet you may be embarrassed by how romantic you’d like to be with women. For example, you might be thinking, “well what if she doesn’t like it? What if I’m coming on way too strong?”

And sometimes, you’d be right. Most of the time, however, women love a little romance. Even from their friends. So showing your romantic side will win you brownie points – if you follow these three rules:

  • RULE ONE: The romance should always be for you. Yeah, you buy her flowers to brighten her day. But why did you think about buying flowers in the frist place? Was it because you were in a romantic mood? Or because buying her flowers would make you feel good? As long as your emotional pleasure is the main CAUSE of romance, she’ll pick up on it, and appreciate the gesture. (This is what women’s intuition is for)
  • RULE TWO: Don’t overdo it. Little gestures are bigger than big gestures. A pair of slippers for her to wear because she’s always cold in your house is a MUCH better surprise than a candle light dinner for two (unless it’s Valentine’s Day, or a special holiday.) Keep your presents small…
  • RULE THREE: Curb your compliments. When you get the urge to compliment a woman, take a second and stop. Do you want to make her like you? Or do you want to make her feel good? The second is good. The first is “weak man” territory.

Make Her Feel Good

Who do you like to hang around more? A friend who makes you feel bad or a friend who makes you feel good?

Being a nice guy means wanting to make people feel good. Being a weak man means wanting to make people like you. Here’s how you can stay on the “ nice guy” side:

  • When you’re talking to someone, always ask yourself, “How can I make this person feel good ABOUT HIMSELF?” Most men ask “How can I make this person feel good ABOUT ME?” And it’s a losing, weak man question.
  • Feel free to become interested in people. You may feel like you get “too” interested in people, and you may feel like they’ll be annoyed you want to know so much about them. Such a thing has NEVER happened! People will talk about themselves for HOURS, as long as you make them feel good about themselves. So ask away.
  • Finally, always compliment. Never criticize. A great book for dealing with people is “How To Win Friends And Influence People” written by Dale Carnegie. His main principle: Never criticize, condemn or complain. And if you’re trying to get a girlfriend, get laid or even get a one night stand, being positive will get your farther than bitching or whining.

Give Her Respect

You respect her. This means you treat her like a lady. This means you want to take things slow, and not rush into a sexual situation she may regret later. This is fine and OK. Here’s what you NEED to remember, though:

  • Women are sexual. Just like men are sexual. Just like you are sexual. This doesn’t mean you’re thinking about sex 24/7 (or maybe you are) This means you like sex (and oral sex and anal sex and…you get the picture), and you want sex to be a natural part of your life. So when you respect a woman, don’t forget to respect this part of her personality, as well.
  • This means no judging, no calling her a slut, but it also means you can feel free to hold her hand, stroke her hair and kiss her, as long as the timing is right.

Once You Get Into Bed With Her….

Being a nice guy, you think sex with this girl is going to be important and special. Well, Skippy, that’s what she wants, too. She wants sex with you to be special and important and romantic and emotional and dirty and kinky and sweaty and FUN.

So use your desire to get sexual with her as a TOOL to treat her nicely:

  • Make your first time sex special. After a nice date, come back to your place and invite her up to watch a movie. From there, you can gradually make your move, so sex feels like something that “just happened” for her. This is the greatest gift you can give a woman.
  • Also – during sex – feel free to make her feel special. Do this by telling her how sexy she looks and how good she’s making you feel. You don’t like having sex with a silent woman, do you? You like when she tells you how good she’s feeling. Return the favor – show her how special she makes you feel.

How Being Shy Can Actually Help You

Here’s a ground-breaking thought: Women like shy guys. Women like quiet guys. Why? Because shy, quiet guys are mysteries to be solved. And women can’t get enough of a man who’s a mystery. So why aren’t women beating down your door to date you? Because women are scared of making the first move.

So the one – EXTREMELY EASY – way to use your shy side to date ANY woman is simply to make the first move. To ask her out to coffee. To touch her first. If you do this, and she knows you’re shy, she’ll know how big of a move this was, for you.

And she’ll feel special and flattered by it – exactly the way you want her feel.

Let Her Know That You Like HER…Not Some Random Girl

And this is the most important quality of all! Because you’re her friend and because you’re a nice guy, you like her for her. You don’t want just some random woman’s random sex. You want her. You want her good parts. You want her flaws. And you want her because you think SHE is special.

Don’t underestimate how powerful this urge is. Imagine someone walking up to you and saying, “I’ve traveled the world and I’ve met hundreds of thousands of people. I’ve seen the pyramids in Egypt and I’ve walked along the Great Wall of China. I’ve met every culture, every nationality and seen things I couldn’t have imagined or made up in a thousand years. But you are the most important person in the world to me, and I want to be with you.”

Makes you feel special, doesn’t it? Obviously it’s an exaggerated example, but doesn’t it match up with SO MANY of the romantic fantasies in movies and books? Luckily for you, you actually feel this way about her.

So don’t be afraid to show it. Just make sure you don’t come across like a “weak man” trying to suck up to her, for attention.