Marriage

5 Sex Tips For Married Couples

Fact or Myth: Married couples have 25% to 300% MORE sex than their single counterparts depending on age.

Believe it or not – that’s a fact! Contrary to popular belief, married couples actually have quite a bit of sex! So why are all the married couples trying to improve their sex lives? That’s because it’s about quality, not quantity. Married couples often have less satisfying sex than their single counterparts because things simply get boring. Here’s how to make all that married sex count!

Make Time For Great Sex. Sure, you’ve heard it before. You might be thinking, “Not bloody likely!” But with the every day demands that we face, such as work and children, sex with our spouses often gets put on the back burner. Well, you’re going to have to make time for sex if you want a better, more satisfying sex life. And not a quickie – chances are, that’s what you’re already doing. Make time for good sex.
Resolve Your Conflicts. Every married couple has conflicts. But when you and your spouse argue outside the bedroom, those feelings of anger, hurt and frustration often get carried into the bedroom. These feelings can affect your sex life in numerous significant ways. Spouses who have regular conflicts with each other don’t feel as emotionally close to their partners, making it difficult to totally open yourself to great sex. Resolving your conflicts with each other before getting busy can help you to feel emotionally and physically open to your partner, often resulting in mind blowing sex!
Exercise Together. Exercise is a great boost for the libido, and exercising together? Even better. Not only do you get to spend time with your spouse that you ordinarly may not have been able to do, you also get to see them all hot and sweaty…well, you get the picture. In addition to the sexy, sweaty fun, exercising regularly (and eating a healthy, nutritious diet) will help keep you fit and attractive to your spouse.
Flirt With Each Other. Remember when you and your spouse first started dating? There was lots of flirting going on, and neither you nor your partner were sure what was going to happen next. That fun, exciting feeling of having no idea of their next move often gets lost when you get married, mainly because you know exactly what is going to happen next. You can improve your sex life by bringing that flirty, fun feeling back into your relationship. Go to a bar with your spouse and exchange some witty banter and see where it heads.
Be Completely Spontaneous. For the same reason flirting can often revv up the quality of sex in a marriage, so can a healthy level of spontaneity. Instead of going home for the night, just keep driving and see where it leads you. Surprise your spouse with a hot hotel room for the weekend, or wear a new, sexy pair of undies. If you usually wear boxers or panties, try wearing a string bikini or a thong. It doesn’t matter what you do, just be creative and break out of the norm. Surprise your partner with something totally unexpected, even if it’s something small.

Save Your Marriage – Revive Romance and Passion with this Simple Trick

By melody

For the past 25 years I’ve had married couples come in to see me who have lost connection with each other and are contemplating divorce. Some are very committed to the idea of marriage and are traumatized by the idea, but they feel so unhappy they don’t have a clue how to revitalize what was once a passionate connection.

Sometimes these couples haven’t had sex in years, perhaps decades. But they stay together “for the kids” or because they “love” each other but they have no passion for each other any more. They also don’t feel emotionally connected and often feel lonely and sad.

Here’s what happened: they quit treating each other as friends. They stopped talking about important things because they were afraid of each other’s reactions. Most of the time, they blame their partner for the lack of connection and don’t recognize how their own choices led to a distant, passionless marriage.

Now, understand, I’m not saying you are “to blame”. What I am saying is that you have a choice about how to move forward, whether you are newly in a relationship or your marriage has gone south for years. And, you can’t “blame” your partner; this was a mutually acquired distance that took both of you to create. The good news is that only one of you has to begin to change gears for things to move out of neutral.

Why Does This Happen To A Marriage?

When we first get married or commit to someone, we see this person as our savior. We see them as the person who will rescue us from loneliness, sexlessness, and emotional isolation. Maybe we even see them as the person who will rescue us from our financial burdens. Our ideas of romance are like those of Edward and Bella in the Twilight series. We think that Edward will sweep us off our feet and make us feel like a princess, or Bella will love us no matter how many horrible things we have done. We will never fight, or have disagreements, we will always support each other and clean up after each other without having to discuss anything or challenge each other.

Now I know, your logically thinking “No, I didn’t expect that, I know people have conflict”. Yes, I know you “know” that to be true but the little kid inside each of us secretly longs for someone to be like our mother (or the mother we should have had) who was unconditionally loving and expected nothing from us. I am of course, talking about our unconscious desire for regression into infancy. We all have that pull, and it is what we emotionally crave from our spouse.

And anything that indicates we will not get what the little kid in us wants feels like a violation of our contract with our partner. We pout, we stomp our feet, or we dance around and try to please or we hold our tongue so as to not threaten loss of what we hoped we could have.

The bottom line is that we stop seeing the other person as our friend, and we see them as the person who is denying us the one thing that we most need. Because of this, we go into a self protective mode and stop treating each other with the kindness and respect that we treat our friends.

Take the Risk

Step back from your self, from your marriage, and take a really hard look at the way YOU act toward your partner. Start talking to them like someone you respect and want to get to know better. Trust me, there is more to your partner than you know.

So what if it upsets your spouse for you to discuss money, sex, housework (or whoever the topic)? In order to develop intimacy we have to be willing to let the other person have whatever feelings they have, even if they cry, storm around, or yell. Short of physical or verbal abuse, expression of emotion is needed between spouses. Learning to express your needs requires that you learn to deal with your partners unhappy feelings. No matter who you are, you are going to have thoughts, feelings and desires different from those of your spouse, and sometimes, they will cause conflict.

Chose to Be Emotionally Available

Being emotionally available means being able to tolerate you own feelings, as well as those of your partner. Being a full partner in a marriage means being willing to listen empathetically to your partners feelings without judging them or attempting to curtail them. That said, I know it’s not an easy thing to do. Our survival brain yells at us that we are risking being abandoned, divorced, or maybe even hurt and the truth is; we are, it is risky. But in reality it is no riskier than pretending those feelings aren’t there. When we ignore the real feelings that exist in our self or in our partner, we risk distance, emotional divorce, infidelity, and long-suffering loneliness.

So take the risk, feel the fear, and do it anyway. In the long run, you, and your spouse will fare better. Marriage or no marriage, you will have more honestly, intimacy, and understanding between you.

Is Your Relationship Ready For Marriage?

By loveandsex

Marriage is a huge step, and it’s definitely not something to rush into. How can you tell if the relationship you are in is marriage material?

“Going to Fiji is not marriage, going to Costco is marriage” – Kelly Ripa.

You know you’re ready to marry someone if you are willing to endure the Hell on Earth that is shopping at Costco with that person. Seeing your significant other at Costco means seeing them at their worst: they will be angry, cranky, hungry, sleepy, annoyed, childish, and pissed off. They will try and convince you that you “need” to by industrial size quantities of some food that they know you hate (which they of course love), and you will be subjected to the sight of humanity at its fear based worst.

If you can make it out of there alive (without spending yourself stupid or killing each other), then you should probably get married. If you can go there and be so in love that you forget you’re in Hell (and by Hell I mean Costco) and not be bothered by this, then by all means run like hell to the altar.

Do You Like Them With Their Clothes On?

Sure, everyone’s tons of fun when they’re naked and doing naughty things you. And lots of sex happens when you are dating, often because you two have different homes and can get the hell away from the other. A relationship is one thing, marriage is different, because you’re always there with each other. Generally speaking, your spouse should be as much fun with their clothes on as they are with them off.

How Lucky Do You Feel?

When you’re around this person do you feel like you hit the lottery? Do they make you giddy like a school girl? Get lots of goosebumps? Then marriage is definitely in order. If you don’t, you may not want to walk down the aisle. Romance ebbs and flows but if you’re not feeling super lucky to be with them, then it’s a red flag.

How Easy Is It?

They say relationships are hard work. That’s not true. BAD relationships are work. Good relationships aren’t. If your relationship is easy like Sunday morning, then it’s time to start thinking about walking down the aisle. People love to say relationships take work. They don’t. Relationships are like a car. The vast majority of people reading this don’t know anything about brakes, shocks, struts and all the other car parts you can’t pronounce. Does that stop you from owning and operating a car? No. You don’t need to do work on your car. You just need to do maintenance.

All you really need to do is get it washed regularly, get the oil changed, and get tires every so often. That’s not doing work on your car. You put gas in the tank and turn the key. It goes or it doesn’t. If you don’t do maintenance, you’re an idiot, but you’re going under the hood either. The best marriages in my estimation are the easiest. The more work you’re doing the more problems you have by default. Sure there will be ups and downs, but too much time under the hood usually means it’s time to trade in for a different make and model.

Are You On The Same Page?

Opposites attract, but they don’t marry. If you are super frugal and your partner spends like a drunken sailor, do you really expect it to work long term? Movies always love to talk about the uptight, type A girl and the slacker/hippie type who steals her heart. That works in movies, but in real live they hook up or date but they don’t marry. Or if they do, they’re miserable. Why? Because she is who she is and he is who he is.

The more alike you are, the more you’re going to stay together, because common ground is required to build the foundation upon which the house that is your marriage is built on. The house is built on the foundation and the foundation is designed to fit the house exactly. They don’t say “well, it kind of fits, but we’ll work around it.” No construction foreman has ever looked at a foundation and said “well, I know that’s how it is now, but I’m sure it’ll change down the road.”

You’re two different people with different experiences and view points, so disagreements are inevitable, but you should be arguing because you both want to do the same thing, you just differ on how to do it. If you have the opposite problem, maybe you should just keep dating.

Marriage Proposal Ideas: The Romantic’s Guide To Popping The Question Review

By loveandsex

If you’re looking for the perfect way to ask your girlfriend to marry you and be with you forever, you’ll find a ton of ideas (and more!) in Marriage Proposal Ideas: The Romantic’s Guide To Popping The Question. This book has compiled the best, most romantic ways to propose to a woman (real guys have used these exact scenarios to ask their girlfriends to marry them), so you have many different ideas to choose from – and almost all of them will put a smile on your face and warm your heart!

The Good

There is definitely not a shortage of marriage proposal ideas in Marriage Proposal Ideas: The Romantic’s Guide To Popping The Question, and they range from simple to creative and more. Many of them are incredibly unique and there are more than a few of them that you haven’t heard of before.

Although these are actually stories of how other men proposed to the women they love, most of them are so original that your girl will most likely think that you came up with it all by yourself! There are also small sections on now not to propose and other helpful sections such as timing and location which can be exceptionally helpful for the guy who wants to make sure all his i’s are dotted and his t’s are crossed.

The Bad

The proposal ideas are actually written as stories rather than suggestions on different ways to propose to a woman. The emotional stories and lack of a clear cut “how to” approach actually makes it more appealing to women than men – so some men are going to get rather bored of reading proposal story after proposal story. Also, the stories aren’t categorized or sectioned off at all in the book.

The table of contents does categorize the ideas somewhat, but lists which story numbers fit into a particular category – meaning that you’ll have to scroll through all the stories to find the number you want, say if you were looking for proposal ideas that take place in an airport or involve the help of police or firemen. The lack of organization in Marriage Proposal Ideas: The Romantic’s Guide To Popping The Question makes it somewhat difficult to find what you’re looking for.

The Bottom Line

A marriage proposal has to come from the heart, but if you want to find an original and unique way to ask your girlfriend to marry you, Marriage Proposal Ideas: The Romantic’s Guide To Popping The Question can definitely help you out. You’ll read through hundreds of incredible proposal stories and if you’re creative enough, you can piece together aspects of different proposals to make your own unique set up, personalized just for your girl. If you’re not that good at coming up with romantic stuff, any of the ideas contained in this book will make for an excellent proposal. Almost any of these ideas will make your girl’s face light up and they’re unique and romantic enough that you’ll have an awesome engagement story for years to come.

The Full Marriage Proposal Ideas Review

Marriage proposal ideas can be tough for a guy to come up with on his own, especially if he lacks creativity and imagination. (Hey, a lot of guys do!)

While the organization of this book could definitely use some work, the ideas themselves are fun, exciting and romantic. They range from sweet to exciting to downright over the top! Some of them involve minimal planning while others would require you to put a lot of effort into setting the whole thing up. (One guy had a scuba diving friend! Unless you know a lot of people who scuba dive, chances are, putting that particular engagement scenario together would be downright impossible).

Regardless, the ideas in Marriage Proposal Ideas: The Romantic’s Guide To Popping The Question will either give you everything you need to set up an incredible engagement or get the gears turning in your own head so you can come up with something as equally fun and romantic for your girlfriend.

Since the ideas are actually real life scenarios that other guys have used to propose to their girlfriends, it may be a little difficult for men to actually get through the book. Women are much more likely to enjoy the heartfelt tales of perfect proposals, while guys who read Marriage Proposal Ideas: The Romantic’s Guide To Popping The Question are going to be wishing for more of a step by step instruction manual. However, the limited table of contents will be of some help – you’ll at least be able to figure out which proposal stories will have you either using elements of nature, proposing during the holidays, using costumes and more.

Overall, Marriage Proposal Ideas: The Romantic’s Guide To Popping The Question is a great resource if you’re looking to ask that special woman to marry you and you just can’t think of a good enough way to do it. Most of the marriage proposal ideas you will find online are either overdone or chintzy – these are actually fun and unique!

Monogamy: Can I Really Only Have Sex With 1 Person FOREVER?

By dicksinthecity

Monogamy is great for some people, but not for others. How can you tell if you’re about to make a big mistake by swearing to monogamy for the rest of your life?

I’m due to get married in a couple months, but I’m starting to have doubts. I don’t feel I’m as excited as I should be about the big day. This is the last person I’m going to sleep with FOREVER! What’s the difference between cold feet and making a huge mistake?

What She Said:

What kind of doubts? Little ones like, “Will I be able to live with a man who leaves his dirty clothes in a pile by the bed?” or big ones like, “Do I love this person and will I be happy for the rest of my life with him or her?” As you can see, it’s a wide chasm between what constitutes a doubt!

Cold Feet Are Normal

Cold feet are a time honored pre-wedding condition. It’s a big commitment – and an even bigger life change – that you’re lining up for yourself. Who wouldn’t feel a little scared? Even the most wildly in love couples are capable of feeling a tad apprehensive as they approach the altar.

No one wants to think about divorce on his or her wedding day – in fact, if you’re already contemplating an exit strategy, I think you have your answer. But the thought can provide a little levity. While there’s no discounting the magnitude of this decision, it is something that can be undone if you do ultimately decide you’ve made a “huge” mistake.

Be Honest With Yourself

That said it’s time to take a deep breath and be honest with you. Weddings are notoriously stressful events to plan. Is your lack of excitement due to feeling overwhelmed with everything from whom to choose as your bridesmaid to suddenly trying to meet the every demand of your family? Or is it something much deeper? Only you can discern what’s bothering you.

Are You In Love?

A huge mistake would be to marry someone you’re not in love with. It would also be devastating to tie the knot with someone who treats you badly before you’re even hitched. A ceremony won’t make any problems you’re having as a couple go away – in fact, it will only heighten them. If you’re truly in love and in a good relationship, a case of cold feet is merely jitters that will most likely smooth out by the time you cut the cake.

What He Said:

Thinking you can do anything for the rest of your life is impossible. If you focus on doing it today, then that’s very doable. It’s attainable. Focus not on the fact that you’re only going to be screwing one person for the rest of your life but rather on having the best sex you can with that person today and go from there.

Taking It Day By Day

It’s the same process for the rest of your relationship with that person. You’re probably freaking out over the fact that you don’t know if you can be in a relationship with them for the rest of your life. Just focus on having the best relationship you can with them today. Then go to bed. Then repeat. Then repeat. And repeat. And when in doubt, repeat. See a pattern?

You probably aren’t in line for an arranged marriage. You probably won’t say “I do” against your will. And you’re probably not marrying someone two dates in. That means you’ve been doing this relationship thing for a while with them and you obviously see something in them or you wouldn’t have been doing this for this long. So there must be something good to it. So relax, take a few deep breaths and throw the bridal bouquet at a really old lady and watch all the young women trample her. It’ll be loads of fun. Promise.