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Q&A: Shouldn’t My Girlfriend Want Sex More Often?

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If your partner wants sex less than you, it can be frustrating. Whether it’s the quality of sex or the quantity of it that is suffering, it’s no fun when she just isn’t that into it. What causes a woman’s sex drive to decrease, or even become non-existent? Is there something wrong? What can you do?

Question: My girlfriend is good with sex once or twice a month. She doesnt crave it! She is 26. Shouldn’t she?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPhxp8hWgeE[/youtube]

Different People, Different Needs

Sexual needs – as well as physical and emotional needs – aren’t the same for men as they are for women and these needs can even differ from person to person. There isn’t a “right” or “wrong” amount of sex to crave or want, and various people can be satisfied by very little sex while others just can’t get enough. What makes a sexual relationship a good one is if two people’s sexual needs match. If you and your partner both want lots of sex, you can easily satisfy each other. If neither you nor your partner needs a lot of sex to satisfy your sexual desires, no one in the relationship is lacking. It’s important to find a way to be compatible with your partner sexually, in both quantity and quality.

Make Sure She Enjoys Sex

One reason a woman can become disinterested in sex is if sex literally becomes disinteresting to her. If she’s not enjoying sex, and it’s simply becoming a job to her or another thing on her to-do list, she’s not going to want it very often. Make sure she’s getting as much out of sex as you are. If she’s not, there’s simply no reason for her to have sex. Make an effort to give her an orgasm every time, and do things she enjoys doing in the bedroom. Communicate with her and ask her what turns her on and what her fantasies are.

Why She Might Not Want Sex

Sometimes in a woman’s life, sex is great – when you can find time to enjoy it. A woman who is tired all the time from work, or stressed out because of kids or other resp0nsibilities will quickly find her need for sex dwindling. If your partner is overwhelmed, try taking some of the strain off her by offering to cook dinner or do the laundry. If you have kids, get a babysitter for a night and let your partner just relax. Even if you don’t have sex that night, she’ll be in a better frame of mind to be able to enjoy sex another night. Another contributing factor for a decreased sex drive is medical problems or medications. Certain medical conditions – such as depression or even physical problems – can be responsible for a non-existent sex drive. Some medications can also cause a decrease in sex drive, including medications for anxiety and depression.

If you have tried talking to your partner, learning how to give her great orgasms and pleasure during sex, and tried taking some of her daily stress away and she still isn’t responding with an improved sexual appetite, consider visiting your doctor for the next step.

Q&A: How Can I Get Her To Let Me Finish In Her Mouth?

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It’s no secret that guys absolutely love blowjobs. In fact, many men would prefer getting a blowjob to having sex. Some women, however, don’t like giving men oral sex and especially don’t like the idea of swallowing semen when he has an orgasm. Is there any way to get a girl turned on by the idea of giving her man oral sex?

Question: Hello, I am 32 and been with my girlfriend for 9 years. In the past, we have had oral sex a lot and in the past 4 years it has went downhill at 65 mph. She would rather stroke it off or just have sex. She on the other hand loves receiving oral sex. How can I get her to give me oral and finish the job? She doesn’t like the taste, and the thought of it makes her sick. I crave it very badly!

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cckN6U6_r8k[/youtube]

Improving The Taste Of Your Semen

The biggest complaint that women have about giving oral sex is that they don’t like the taste of semen. Some men’s semen is bitter, or too salty, and just doesn’t taste good going down. If your partner has no problem with the temperature or texture of semen – only the taste of it – there are some ways you can improve the taste of your ejaculate. Start by eliminating toxins such as alcohol and cigarettes if you smoke, and add lots of vegetables and fruits to your diet. Pineapple juice or fresh pineapple is a great way to quickly make your semen taste sweeter. You can try to compromise with your partner and let her know that you’re doing things to improve the taste of your ejaculate and ask her if she’ll try again.

Don’t Pressure Her

Many women don’t like the temperature or texture of semen, and no amount of fresh pineapple will change that. If your partner really doesn’t like the idea of you finishing in her mouth and swallowing your ejaculate, don’t pressure her. There are just some things that many women won’t do, and swallowing is one of them. Don’t make a big deal out of it, because you may end up getting cut off from getting a blowjob all together, if that hasn’t already happened. If your partner has made it clear that letting you finish in her mouth is just something she’s not willing to do, pressing the issue could do damage to your relationship both sexually and emotionally. It’s important that on this issue, you respect her wishes if you can’t reach a compromise with her.

Trying Different Things

There are many different things you and your partner can do in the bedroom to satisfy each other sexually. If you are uncomfortable doing something or your partner is, make an effort to find something else that you both like to do and can agree on. Try incorporating role play, light bondage or sex toys into the bedroom to heat things up, or take a break from sex all together for awhile – called “sex detox” – to help restart your engines. Don’t give up on finding new ways to please your partner and receive pleasure yourself , because there is always something new to try!

Q&A: Is My Girl Pregnant? How Can I Tell?

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Wondering if you got a girl pregnant or not can definitely get you stressed out and worried in an instant. Many women show signs of pregnancy, even in the early stages of pregnancy, and some women show no signs at all. How can you tell if a girl is pregnant? Is there a surefire way to find out if she is pregnant or not?

Question: How do you know if your girl is pregnant? I’m a guy & am a little worried I did get her pregnant, and am curious as to the signs.

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UXAsNgFatWw[/youtube]

Signs Of Pregnancy

Some women exhibit signs of pregnancy and sometimes do so even before they know they are pregnant. Many signs of pregnancy include irritability, fatigue, sore breasts and cramping without bleeding. The most common sign of pregnancy is a missed period. None of these signs, however, will definitively tell you whether a girl is pregnant or not. Many other health conditions – and even something as simple as stress – can cause some or all of these symptoms in women. Also, many women can be pregnant and not exhibit any signs of pregnancy, including continuing having what seems like a monthly period throughout pregnancy.

Home Pregnancy Tests

The easiest and fastest way to determine pregnancy for yourself is to purchase a home pregnancy test. There is no age limit on pregnancy tests, so anyone can buy them. Pregnancy tests range from more expensive digital models to simple ones that are available at dollar stores. A pregnancy test detects HCg – a hormone called human chorionic gonadatropin – and is only produced by a woman during pregnancy. Some pregnancy tests can detect this hormone as early as five or six days before a woman’s expected period, and a positive result is almost 100% accurate. A false negative is more likely, simply because some women do not produce enough HCg to register on the test until they’re well into pregnancy. When purchasing a pregnancy test, get two. Take the first one the earliest the box says you can and no earlier. If it’s positive, take the other. If that is positive, schedule an appointment with your doctor. If the first test is negative, wait a week and take the other. If it is still negative, you’re probably in the clear. However, a missed period with a negative pregnancy test still needs to be investigated by a physician.

Seeing The Doctor

A doctor can determine pregnancy with a blood test, a urine test (much like a home pregnancy test) or a physical exam. If you’ve gotten a positive result on a pregnancy test, your doctor will automatically repeat the urine analysis, in addition to other tests to confirm the pregnancy. If you’ve missed a period and are still having negative pregnancy results, your doctor will likely take blood and perform a physical exam to determine if a pregnancy exists.

While stressing out about a possible unwanted pregnancy is common, there’s nothing you can accomplish by worrying. The best way to put your mind at ease is to practice safer sex to begin with – or starting now, if you’re lucky enough to have had only a pregnancy scare.

Q&A: How Can We Spice Up Our Sex Life?

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Often in relationships, especially steady and monogomous relationships, sex can get a little boring or dull. Does that mean your sex life is over, or you have to find a new partner to have a good sex life? Hardly! Here are some great ideas you can incorporate into the bedroom to spice up your sex life – and your relationship will likely improve too!

Question: My love and I have been sexually active for almost 4 years now. We have tried just about everything in the bedroom from romance to role play, to toys and a little friendly torture. As of lately things are a bit dull. How can I spice things up to make her, myself, and our relationship get a breath of fresh air, without making possible awkward suggestions?

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MP8gvX6gB2I[/youtube]

Sexual Detox

If your sex life seems to be lacking – regardless of what you do to spice it up – you might be burnt out on sex all together. Often, when sex gets boring, one or both partners throw themselves into an effort of making it better. Therefore, many couples end up having sex more often and trying new things in the bedroom, all without actually improving the quality of their sex lives. If this is your story, it might be time for a break – something called “Sex Detox.” Ian Kerner’s book of the same name details how you can use a thirty day break from sex to your advantage to take your sex life from “blah” to the way it used to be.

“Thrill Of The Chaste”

Ian Kerner says what makes sex detox work is the “thrill of the chaste.” When you and your partner first got together, every kiss and every touch was electric. Why? Because it was new. Your body and mind weren’t accustomed to them. By actively abstaining from sex for at least a month, you and your partner can re-create those feelings. Once again, each touch will become all new again. Your body will react differently to a touch that it is not accustomed to, and you’ll begin to experience your partner in a different way.

The Difference Between Not Having Sex And Choosing Not To Have Sex

Often in a relationship, daily stresses take their toll on sex. Kids, careers and housekeeping all get in the way of a great sex life. Often, couples are so tired by the time they step foot in the bedroom that they simply can’t bring themselves to do anything but hit the sack – literally. Instead of letting your life stop you from having sex, make the decision that you’re going to not have sex for a month yourself. Instead of being too tired to have sex, you’ll be trying not to have sex. The shift in mentality makes a huge difference, because as human beings, we all want something more when we’re trying to do without it, just like how good chocolate cake looks and smells when you’re on a diet. Once your diet is over, that chocolate cake will taste even better! The same applies with going on a sexual “diet” from your partner. You and your partner will constantly be tempting and enticing each other in a way that you never have before!

Pleasing Your Partner With A Strap On

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If you and your partner are looking for something to spice up your sex life, you may want to consider pleasing your partner with a strap on. In this alternative to traditional anal sex, a woman will wear a strap on dildo and please her partner anally, focusing on stimulating the prostate gland. Some men, however, are adverse to this idea – here’s how to find out if you can please your man with a strap on.

Introducing The Idea

Many women enjoy the idea of having sex with their partner with a strap on. It gives them the feeling of power and lets them experience a different side of sex altogether. Some men enjoy being on the receiving end, however, many men do not relish the idea at all. How can you find out if your man would like being pleased anally with a strap on? First, try traditional anal sex and let your partner please you anally. This is a good way to introduce him to the idea of anal play at all. Communicate with him how much it turns you on. Also, try a few roleplaying activities that allow your partner to take the role of the submissive. This is a great way to allow him to explore being submissive without diving right into anal play. If he enjoys anal sex with you and enjoys being submissive sometimes, browse a sex toy store online and let him suggest a few toys he would like to play with.

Getting Him Warmed Up

Don’t start by outright suggesting he try being on the receiving end of a strap on. Instead, give him plenty of time to warm up to anal play by purchasing a few small anal toys, such as anal beads or small butt plugs, and use lots and lots of silicone or water based lubricant. Never use desensitizing lube, because if it is painful or uncomfortable, he should stop. Once your partner really gets into anal play, try taking a look at a smaller sized dildo with a strap on. Let him know it could be a toy for both of you to enjoy!

Do’s And Don’ts Of Strap On Play

  • Don’t try any kind of anal play without lots of lube.
  • Don’t force your partner into a submissive role or strap on play if that isn’t where he wants to be.
  • Listen to him if he tells you something makes him uncomfortable or becomes painful.
  • Start small and work your way up. Always use toys and dildos that have a wide base on the end of them to prevent the anal toy from being lodged in the anus. You don’t want to risk it not being able to get back out.
  • Start slow and go slow. Anal play is not the time to be rough – stuff can tear back there!
  • Have a safety word and use it if one of you becomes uncomfortable.
  • Be open to ideas that your partner wants to try too – let him share something with you that really turns him on and make a vow to try it with him.