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Sexting: How Women Think About Sex And How To Give Them What They Crave

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Sexting is an extremely powerful flirting and seduction tool when you use it the right way and with the right attitude. With any girl, your attitude is either a huge turn on or turn off, and when you apply that concept to sexting, you can literally have your partner wishing she could tear your clothes off before you even walk in the door from work. Here’s how your attitude – and how sexting – can give your partner what she secretly desires!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CXj7US3q8uI[/youtube]

A Woman’s Biggest Erogenous Zone Is Her Mind

Have you ever seen a really hot girl with a pretty average or below average guy and wondered how he got her on his arm? You figure it’s because he’s great in bed, but that’s rarely the case. It’s more likely because he found a way to stimulate her mind and emotions! Sure, a woman values looks in a man, but definitely not more than his smarts or his sense of humor. A woman greatly values being intellectually stimulated, even more so than having a guy that looks fabulous. If a guy can make a woman feel great mentally and emotionally, he’s a shoe in even if his physical attributes aren’t the greatest.

Women Are Attracted To Non-Creepy Dominance

Women are almost always attracted to non-creepy dominance, with “non-creepy” being the operative word. Contrary to what some men may think, it is possible for men to assert confidence and dominance without being superior, condescending or hateful. Girls are attracted to men who appear confident and in control without acting cocky or degrading towards the ladies.

For example, a great way to exert confidence and dominance on a date without being creepy is to have a “date plan” in mind, such as picking the restaurant. Tell your girl, “I’d love to take you here, they have the best ‘pasta e olio’ I’ve ever had.” However, picking the restaurant doesn’t mean being a jerk about it and insisting that you go there. If she’s not into Italian, have a back up. But more likely than not, your girl will appreciate you taking the lead and showing that you’re a strong, confident man.

You definitely want to AVOID saying, “I don’t care, whatever you want to do” when planning a date, because it shows weakness and lack of leadership qualities – and this is something most women aren’t attracted to. Get used to showing your girl what your preferences are and never apologize for what you desire!

How Does All This Apply To Sexting?

Take the strong, confident attitude that you use when you’re going on a date with your lover and apply it to sexting her. Sexting is powerful because it takes sex and puts it into a woman’s language – the language of words. Most women keep their cell phones with them at all times, so sexting will allow you to communicate with her sexually in a way that is important to her. It’s like blowing past all her defenses and stimulating her right at her very core!

In your sexy text messages, you’re going to tell her what you’re going to do to her behind closed doors (and how badly you want to do it) in a dominant, leading manner. Make sure you use descriptive, sensual language that hooks into her imagination and stimulates her mind. Use your creativity to come up with sexy situations such as oral sex or a new sex position and describe it to her over text.

You can even tell her how she’ll respond to your actions to create a titillating fantasy. Talking about foreplay with your partner throughout the day will get both you and her so turned on that it will be all you can do to keep your head straight while you finish the work day! Here are some great examples of sexting that you can use to turn her on:

  • “When I get home, I’m going to nibble may way down your neck and….”
  • “I want to lick your clitoris while I fondle your nipples….”
  • “I can’t wait to get home and kiss you all over your body….”
  • “You’ll love it when I slip my fingers inside….”

Coming up with something to say over text to get your partner turned on isn’t difficult if you use your imagination and learn to let go a little. If you’re apprehensive about what to say and when to say it, just remember that whatever you’re thinking of doing to her in your head is something you can say in a text!

Dirty Talk: The 5 Hottest Words To Say During Sex (For Him)

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Dirty talk is a big part of sex. There’s no describing the level of arousal that a kinky phrase or two can put you in. Some of us do it consciously to goad a girl deeper into ecstasy, while some do it unconsciously. If you’re engaged in hot sex with a girl, here are some of the hottest phrases to tell her.

“My Bitch”

There’s a certain finesse that should accompany this phrase. Say it like you would ‘my darling’ or ‘princess.’ There are many girls out there who get excited just hearing this phrase during sex.

Women who are usually stubborn and with a lot of ‘girl power’ outside the bedroom like this dirty talk phrase in the sexual context, most likely because the term ‘bitch’ indicates surrendering (or losing) control because of extreme pleasure. These girls are also the ones who won’t take offense at the term, especially when said in the most adoring tone.

“Mistress”

What excites women is the notion that they’re doing something extremely evil during sex, not unlike the quintessential dominatrix characters who like BDSM in popular movies. Use this dirty talk when you’re encouraging your girl to do what she wants with your body, take the lead and stay on top during intercourse.

“So Good”

Not many guys understand that girls need more than just the occasional grunts of pleasure from their partners. This phrase sounds sexy coming from a guy who’s tensed up and about to have an orgasm. This phrase affirms that she’s giving you pleasure, which is gratifying especially when she’s going down on you.

“You’re Beautiful”

Believe it or not, this phrase can actually be considered dirty talk. Inside the bedroom, this phrase is like napalm. Use it while you’re on top of her or when she’s facing you; and before she enters her orgasmic phase. A girl becomes conscious of how she looks while having sex, and telling her she’s pretty even if her face is scrounged up in pleasure can boost her arousal.

If you’re torn between ‘you’re beautiful’ and ‘you’re sexy,” choose the former. Sexy is something that a woman is insecure about. What she knows as ‘sexy’ may have something to do with the type of woman that would fit inside a size 2 dress. The word ‘beautiful,’ on the other hand, has a certain ring to it that makes a woman feel all giddy and aroused.

“Want More? I’ll Give You More”

This isn’t just a passé line from a Britney Spears song, it’s something that tells a girl you’re not going to cut her pleasure short anytime soon. Remember, women can have multiple orgasms, which means they’re ready to go again as soon as they finish their first orgasm. Telling her this means she can expect you to last all night, or at least longer than you usually do.

When you decide to try dirty talk, mind your tone. Don’t try talking dirty when you’re pissed off, as it will come out differently. Your objective is to make her hot, not to embarrass or humiliate her during sex.

5 Mistakes Couples Make When Trying To Dirty Talk

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Okay, so you’ve agreed to give talking dirty a go with your partner. You may be a little nervous, but you love them so much and only want to make them happy. Besides, your sex life could really use a boost. However, many people make grave mistakes when learning how to dirty talk and these mistakes will end up causing more problems than you originally bargained for. Like you, many people have the potential to fall into the trap of these 5 mistakes. Avoid these mistakes at all costs to save yourself the embarrassment of a dirty talk attempt gone horribly wrong!

Mistake 1: Emulating The Dirty Talk In Porn Films

A good deal of women are turned off by porn, so try not to emulate what you’ve seen during some of those movies. Lots of them have cheesy lines and actors that aren’t up for academy awards for a very good reason. Many of these lines are not only cheesy, but they can be crass and derogatory towards women and sometimes even men. Also remember that these lines are scripted, and very, very fake. Your partner will definitely be able to tell that you’re not sincere at all in your dirty talk if you use lines from a porn movie. Avoid copying what you hear the porn stars say in the bedroom and you’ll be on your way to successful dirty talk.

Mistake 2: Making The Dirty Talk Unbelievable

Be aware that sometimes talking dirty can come across as very insincere. Telling your man, “Your cock is so huge,” when in reality is only about 3 inches isn’t going to make him suddenly feel like a stud. It’s actually going to make him feel much more self conscious about his smaller size. Likewise, telling her that that you love her massive tits when she is more “grape” than “grapefruit” in size will more than likely backfire. Sure, indulge a little but don’t go completely overboard with your exaggeration. In fact, when your lover is overly conscious of his or her size, dirty talk can do amazing things to boost their confidence. Tell the guy with the tiny penis that his cock rubs your clit so perfectly it makes you cum or whisper to your wife that you love being able to put her whole breast in your mouth. Dirty talk gives you the avenue to banish their insecurities and make them eager for more hot sex with you. Instead of exaggerating what they’re insecure about, talk about how much you love it. They’ll feel great about their body if they know it makes you really, really hot.

Mistake 3: Putting False Expectations In Their Heads

When you’re using dirty talk, don’t tell your partner about things you honestly have NO intentions of doing (ie. a threesome, group sex, farm animals, sex in public, midgets, bondage, etc.) You may find that it triggers some new fantasies or embeds some new images in his or her mind that he or she could continue to ask you to talk about and then want to act them out in real life. Reserve your dirty talk for things that you and your partner can actually make happen. Tell her that you want to bend her over the washing machine and do her from behind or tell him that you want to give him road head the next time you guys have a long drive in the car.

Mistake 4: Using Dirty Talk As The Sizzle Rather Than The Spice

Talking dirty can also become redundant, just like the same sex positions day after day after day. Make sure that you don’t use the same phrases over and over, or trust me, it will have the exact opposite effect and your partner might end up thinking, “Ok, I’ve heard that so many times. Please shut up already!” Instead, try your best to find new and different ways of telling your partner that they turn you on or what you want to do to them when you get them alone. If you’re having trouble thinking of something new to say, try using your surroundings as an inspiration. Going grocery shopping? Tell her how hot it would make you if you bought a very smooth, large cucumber and used it at home! Dirty talk won’t get boring if you use your imagination.

Mistake 5: Giving Up When It’s Not Turning Them On

Sometimes dirty talk can be more comical than erotic, depending on what is said and how it is said. It’s okay to laugh! But don’t give up. There’s actually a lot to learn! It’s not just the words you say, it’s how you say them. If your dirty talk isn’t appearing to turn your partner on, ask them why. Keep open communication about what they like and what they don’t like. If they’re not into something in particular, it doesn’t mean they’re turned off by dirty talk all together. It just means that that particular phrase didn’t do that much for them. Find something else to say instead!

Q&A: Long Distance Relationship – Alternatives To Phone Sex

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One of the hardest things to do in a long distance relationship is achieve any real level of physical intimacy. Even arranging meeting face to face as often as possible isn’t going to cut it if you’re going long distance for any significant period of time. Phone sex can definitely get boring, so here’s how you can keep the fire alive in other fun ways.

Question: HELP! I’m in a long distance relationship, any tips on keeping the loving feeling going? My boyfriend isn’t really into phone sex. PLEASE HELP with any other suggestions!

–YouTube Viewer

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U2v3flDbxBM[/youtube]

Sexting

Send your partner racy texts or picture sexts throughout the day to remind him how hot he is for you. Encourage your partner to send you a few titillating texts of his own! Tell your partner what you want to do to him next time you see him, or what you’d like him to do to you. You and your partner will love getting unexpected, sexy texts at random times and you’ll always be on each other’s mind. If you and your partner see each other often, such as every weekend or every couple of weeks, sexting can definitely be a primary way of building up the tension leading up to the next face to face meeting.

Emails & Pictures

Emails are a great way to quickly send your partner a sexy little saying, and it’s also a good way to send him pictures of you (and vice versa) without having to get them developed. Read: as racy as you want. A word of caution when it comes to sending naked pictures of yourself over the internet: don’t send anything out that you wouldn’t mind being out there. The Internet is definitely not safe and a number of people may end up with their hands on your naked picture, even if all you did was email it to your boyfriend. However, this may not be a big issue for you.

Webcam Sex

Webcams really upped the game for couples in long distance relationships. Live webcam conversations are as close as you’re going to get to a real face to face conversation with your partner, and the same goes for sex too. Many couples have webcam “sex dates” and meet each other regularly for webcam sex. This is an excellent way for you and your partner both get relief from your sexual frustrations, as well as allowing you to feel sexually close to your partner and not allowing those loving feelings to subside too much.

Teledildonics

Teledildonics is the next big thing in long distance sex. Take remote control dildos and computerize them. Now you have a dildo that hooks up to your computer that your partner can control from their own computer. This is an excellent way to help your partner participate in your pleasure from far away. The downside to teledildonics is that they can be very expensive. Combine teledildonics with webcam sex for a long distance sex experience that is almost like the real thing! A cheaper way for your partner to become involved in your pleasure is to have a dildo made from a mold of your partner’s actual penis!

Phone Sex – Tips For Talking Dirty

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Talking dirty is an art form, one that can seem quite intimidating to master. Contrary to popular belief though, learning to talk dirty isn’t at all difficult. You just have to learn to let yourself go! Here are some excellent tips on how to talk dirty with your partner whether you’re having phone sex or whether you’re in the bedroom!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=npGt9tSU4f8[/youtube]

Set The Right Environment

Getting comfortable and setting the right environment will help you feel sexy and relaxed, therefore you’re going to sound sexy on the phone. Find a spot in your home that is quiet and where you won’t be disturbed, such as your bedroom or a guest room or sitting room. Wait until the kids go to bed, or you’re done watching your favorite television show so you can be totally present in the conversation. Don’t try to have phone sex in the kitchen, the garage or the bathroom (of course, unless you’re taking a hot, steamy bath) because when your partner asks you where you are or what you’re doing, saying, “in the kitchen” is definitely not a turn on. Wear some comfortable clothes, or try wearing some sexy clothes and describing to him what you’re wearing. Light some candles or burn incense, and make sure the television is turned off. You want to be relaxed and able to focus on what you’re saying.

Don’t Be Afraid To Take The Lead

Men love it when women take the lead in sex, and phone sex and talking dirty is no different. While some men do enjoy hearing themselves talk dirty, he’s going to like it even more when you’re the one doing it too. He wants to hear what you like, what you fantasize about and what turns you on – in intimate detail. He will like talking about what turns him on too, but he’ll get bored quickly if he’s the only one doing the talking. Take turns describing what you’re wearing to each other and what you’d like to be doing to each other if you were together. Don’t be afraid to get totally absorbed in the conversation and let your true sexy self come out.

If You’re Feeling Shy

Many people, both men and women, are very shy when it comes to talking dirty, whether it’s on the phone or in person. If you’re feeling nervous about it, there are many ways you can try to overcome your shyness. First of all, make sure you’re using grown up words. You may not want to use some of the “hardcore” words that many people associate with talking dirty, but using anatomically correct words such as “penis” is much better than using other words such as “wee wee” or other pet names. If you find that you can’t come up with anything on your own, ask him to describe what he wants you to do to him. Take notes if you need to, and then simply repeat back to him what he said in first person. If your partner is the one that is shy, let him hear what you’d like to do and have him repeat it back to you! This is a super easy and fun way to break the ice and start talking dirty!