Dirty talk can revamp your sex life like nothing else – but you have to create a great mood first. Here’s how to introduce dirty talk into YOUR bedroom!
Using Your Voice
Dirty talk has to sound sexy. If you say “that feels great” in a very monotone, unexcited voice, then that is not very sexy. Put emotion into your dirty talk. Whispering and breathy comments can be quite sexy. Grunt, moan and make noises – varying the tone and the pitch occasionally so that it does not get monotonous. Scream or shout when you are really into it. Also, you aren’t giving commands like a Colonel or Major to his enlisted men.
The goal here is for both of you to be conveying to each other the passion and intensity of your encounter. It CAN and SHOULD be fun, not work. Imagine the basic tone of a football game. Everyone in the stadium has high expectations but as the game begins, as a sports fan, it starts out slow. We aren’t up off the couch screaming at the players at the top of our lungs from the coin toss.
Start dirty talk slowly – whispers and playful dialogue as you are kissing, and as you are face to face while first getting things warmed up. As the passion heats up you can change the tone and level of your voice to mimic the pace of what is happening in the room. If you’re further apart, or if he’s behind you, you’re going to need to be louder so that mid-stroke someone’s not saying “I’m sorry, honey what did you say??” That’s a sure fire way to break the momentum you have been building.
Another good example is a piece of symphony music. The first notes of the musical composition are not the loudest portions of the piece. The tempo starts out slower, building to the climatic heights in the middle, and then descending at the end.
Imagine your lovemaking as the same. A beautifully written musical form that should keep a pace that reflects the given situation. A lovemaking session where you have a whole night to play and explore would have a different tempo from one where you’re squeezing in a quickie between dinner and taking the kids to soccer practice.
Setting The Mood
Playing some music during dirty talk helps provide background noise that may make it easier so that you won’t feel so self conscious over the sound of your own voice. Some music also has great lyrics that will inspire you to pull them from the song and use them while using dirty talk with your partner. Have you ever known anyone to NOT be turned on while listening to Marvin Gaye, Barry White or Luther Vandross?
Songs like “Let’s Get It On,” “Sexual Healing,” “Got To Give It Up,” “If Only For One Night” and others are romantic, slow, sensual and have very erotic lyrics while providing great inspiration and setting the tone for a romantic night together.
Candles
Candles placed around the bedroom, living room, bathroom or any other room in your house only elevate the feeling of a close, private, safe haven for the two of you to explore each other.
Bubble Bath
Bubble baths are a great way to relax and spend a little more time with foreplay before hitting the sheets. Sitting in the tub together is a great way to start and work up some additional desire. By the time you have washed each others backs and played around in the bubbles, you maybe find yourself never even making it to the bed.
Aromatherapy
Perfumes and bed linen sprays are another way to set the mood for dirty talk in your bedroom. Spritz the pillow cases or the ceiling fan ahead of time so that the room takes on a special scent before it’s time to play. Once you’ve worn a special fragrance during an encounter and your lover smells it on you again, it will take you back to the moments you spent wrapped around each other in the heat of passion.
Wine, Or Your Drink Of Choice
Bring a bottle of wine to bed and poor some slowly into her belly button. Sip it out and then do the same to your partner. Ladies, when he’s going down on you, take a little wine and pour it into a shot glass. Pour it slowly from the top of your mound and it will drip down the inner creases of your thighs – ask him to lick it up. This is an excellent way to put a new twist on oral sex!