Most men watch porn. Unfortunately, a lot of women want to stop their partner from watching porn. These women want their man to look only at them, and think that only they are hot or sexy. Is this a realistic outlook for how a man should behave in a relationship? Or should women relax a little bit and let a man be himself?
Question: What can I do to get my boyfriend to stop looking at porn and not say that other girls are cute/hot/sexy in front of me? I know he’d probably still say it in front of his friends but I don’t like him saying it around me.
–YouTube Viewer
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rXg-c7Clfhs[/youtube]
Men Are Visual Creatures
Men are hardwired to be turned on by visual stimulation. Unlike women, most men can’t read a book to help them get turned on. Instead, most men watch some form of pornography to help them get turned on sexually. Every man likes something different when it comes to porn, whether it’s soft nudity or something a little more hardcore. There’s nothing wrong with a man watching porn to get turned on – it’s completely natural. Unless he’s watching porn and masturbating all the time instead of having sex with you, it’s perfectly normal. He doesn’t qualify for having a porn addiction unless watching porn is something that interrupts or takes over his daily life.
Other Women Can Be Pretty
When you started dating your partner, every other girl in the world didn’t magically get ugly. Forcing him to only look at you and think you are pretty is unreasonable and controlling. It will make your partner feel as though he can’t be honest with you or be himself around you, and it can wreak havoc on your relationship. Let him look at other women, and if he makes a comment about them, so be it. As long as he’s not being derogatory and making comments about how you should look like that, there’s no harm done. Learn to have enough self confidence to know that he thinks you’re sexy and hot too – and his favorite.
Lose The Jealousy Issues
If you find yourself wanting to force your man to stop watching porn or stop glancing at other women around you, it’s time to lose the jealousy issues. It’s normal for a man to watch porn and to notice pretty women around him. What isn’t normal is having such a low self esteem that you feel the need to control your partner so that he only looks at you. Realize that your partner chose to be with you and he makes that choice again every day as he continues to be with you and have a relationship with you. That runs so much deeper than simply thinking another girl is hot or pretty, or being turned on by nakedness. Who isn’t intrigued by nudity? We’re human and it’s part of us. Talk to a counselor – they can help you build your self esteem and learn to love yourself whether your partner looks at porn and other women or not. If you don’t lose the jealousy issues, you might very well lose your man.