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You are here: Home / Archives for better sex

Are You Making These 5 Critical Sex Mistakes?

By loveandsex

Sex tips can take you from an out of touch lover to a virtuoso with just a few reading. While you’re not going to be able to literally hypnotize women, sex tips can put you in a place where you will have the ability to gauge what makes your girlfriend, wife or one nightstand reach orgasm every time.

However, there are some very critical sex mistakes that you could be making without even knowing it. Depending on how open and honest your partner is, they might be too afraid to tell you what you’re doing wrong. If you are committing these mistakes, stop yourself immediately.

1. The Foreplay Is Too Short

Yes, there are times when you are both so hot that you can’t wait to get to the main event. However, most of the time, foreplay is going to be essential. If you are spending less than 5 minutes on foreplay, you’re definitely not giving the girl enough time to warm up before penetration. There should be a lot of kissing, sucking and touching before you ever try to have intercourse with a girl.

Think of it like a car in the winter. How long does it take for the engine to heat up your vehicle in the dead of December? At least 10 minutes? Try to incorporate more foreplay for longer and you will see immense results.

2. No Oral Sex For Her

Oral sex is essential for a girl to get warmed up for sex. If you are not going down on her before sex, you’re committing a very big sex mistake. There isn’t a girl on this planet that doesn’t like when a guy gives them oral sex, especially if he’s good at it. Work your way down her body from her lips to her breasts and then down to her stomach.

Don’t immediately go for her vagina, as this is an amateur move. Lick on her inner thigh before you start to suck and lick on the clitoris. You will start to see her convulse a little in her legs when she wants you to give her oral sex.

3. You Talk Too Much

Being vocal during sex is great. While there are girls out there who like a guy to talk dirty to them, there are times when you can go overboard. Calling them names or being derogatory is fine if that’s what she’s into. However, not every woman is going to want you to call them a whore or a slut during sex.

Asking a ton of questions about whether or not she is enjoying herself or if you are doing things right is not going to turn her on. She will immediately get annoyed and probably tell you to shut up. Don’t talk too much unless she is initiating it.

4. You’re Silent

While no girl wants you to talk their ear off during sex, they don’t really want you to be silent either. There is nothing weirder than a guy that has sex in complete silence. Steady breathing without any vocals can certainly ruin the mood. When you’re having sex, reaffirm her by telling her she’s beautiful or that you like what she’s doing.

This can also get her talking and open up the lines of communication for dirty talk. Being silent during sex will make her wonder if she’s doing it right or if you’re even enjoying it. Talk to her a little during sex so that she knows she is on the right track. If she does something that you really like, make sure that she knows about it. You can also ask her what she wants.

5. You’re WAY Too Kinky

Sure, you like a little kink in your sex. Things can get very boring if it’s the same every time. But the last thing that you want to do is bring the sex shop home with you. Girls like a little kink and she might even want to incorporate sex toys into the bedroom. But you’re with a girl that isn’t into the scene, you might be intimidating her with your overactive fantasy life. Refrain from pulling out all the stops with vibrators, dildos, straps and whips until you know what she’s into.

Unless you met your girl on a sex site, you could easily scare her away within a few minutes. Ease her into your fantasies and you will start to see her open up much more. If you jump in too quickly you’re going to send her to the hills.

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: better sex, foreplay, kink, kinky sex, oral sex, sex tips

5 Sex Rules You Need To BREAK!

By serenapaige

Sex tips are fairly common for all men and women. Whether you think that you should not fake an orgasm or that you should last for hours on end, the rules of nookie are similar to a lot of rules in life: they are made to be broken.

Following those tired old rules of only doing it when you’re in the mood or conducting exactly five minutes thirty five seconds of foreplay before you engage in intercourse can be a burden.

1. Time Matters

One of the biggest misconceptions about nookie is that it is best when it lasts for hours on end. This is not always the case. Yes, you can have an all nighter and it might be the best sex you’ve ever had. However, you can have an amazing quickie with your partner at the drop of a hat.

Having sex quickly can be even more exciting than have a long session. Some men think that they have to be seductive and build up. While this is true in most cases, your wife or girlfriend can easily reach climax as quickly as you do. Don’t get hung up on the amount of time that you spend getting it on.

2. He Always Has To Initiate

A lot of women think that it’s the guy’s job to initiate. While it is fairly traditional for a girl to be more submissive than dominant, she doesn’t have to be one who is always waiting. If you’re a woman and you want sex, make the first move yourself. You will find that you have more control over the situation and the change of pace will work to your advantage. Taking control over your partner can also work wonders for your confidence levels.

The next time that you feel the need for nookie, don’t wait for the guy to make the first move. Make it yourself and you will be glad that you did.

3. Fantasies Are For Porn

There are a lot of men and women that do not explore their fantasies when it comes to getting it on. While there are a lot of different fantasies that have made their mark on the porn industry, they are there for a reason. Exploring fantasies with your partner can be a great way to not only shake things up, but take things to next level.

Exploring fantasies with your husband, wife, girlfriend or boyfriend can build intimacy and show them a vulnerable side. A lot of people forgo this because they are afraid of their partner rejecting the idea or thinking that they are strange because of their inner desires. Be open to what you partner wants without judgment.

4. We Both Have To Climax

Another misconception that couples commonly face is whether or not they both have to have an orgasm for the sex to be good. There are a lot men and women that take more pleasure out of pleasuring their partner than actually getting pleasure themselves. If you think that you both have to have an orgasm in order for the nookie to be great, then you’re wrong. Some women do not reach orgasm very easily.

This doesn’t mean that they don’t enjoy climbing in between the sheets, it just means that they do not climax with as much ease as men do. This also doesn’t mean that they do not enjoy the intimacy that comes from having sex. Great nookie doesn’t even have to be sex. You and your partner can derive the same amount of intimacy by just using foreplay. Try to focus on the journey rather than the destination when you are with your partner.

5. We Should Always Orgasm Together

If you think that you should always orgasm together then you should really take a look at your relationship. There are going to be times when you have a lot on your mind or when your partner has a lot on their mind. There are going to be times when you just can’t get there. It takes a lot of work for a couple to climax together even 50 percent of the time.

Don’t treat your sex life like it’s a transaction where the both of you get exactly the same amount out of it. If one of you has an orgasm before the other then it’s fine. There is always oral sex, manual stimulation and other methods to get your partner or yourself off.

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: better sex, orgasm, sex tips, sexual fantasies

4 Ways You’re Touching Her Wrong

By loveandsex

Foreplay is something you never, ever want to skip before sex but what if you’re doing it wrong? Could you be wasting your time when it comes to foreplay?

Your partner can tell a lot by your touch, including exactly how you feel about touching her. Whether you’re nervous, unskilled, aggressive or ignorant, your bad touch will speak louder than any words. Here are 4 ways you’re messing up the foreplay.

1. The “Nervous Nelly”

This kind of hesitant, unsure touch paired with “Is this good? How does that feel? What about this? Should I do a bit more of this? Or maybe that other thing!” will drive any woman mad, and not with pleasure. What does a nervous touch tell a woman?

That you don’t know what you’re doing and are too busy worrying about what she thinks of you to focus on making her feel good! You’re not between her legs to craft some dissertation on the poetry of her beauty. You’re there to be the best sex toy she’ll ever enjoy. Get over yourself and get to work.

2. The “Man-Handler”

Unfortunately, confidence isn’t enough. If you barge on ahead but are so caught up in enjoying yourself that you forget that the breasts in your hands are attached to a warm body, you are probably manhandling your girl. I can guarantee that’s not enjoyable for anyone.

Man-handling simply tells her that you don’t have the experience to touch her like you know what you’re doing, or the knowledge to notice that you aren’t hitting the right buttons. Don’t let it dissuade you unnecessarily; she already knows that you are a man and didn’t grow up with the same body she already knows. Calm down, take a few deep breaths and try to pay attention to her reactions when you touch her. Tease, tantalize – this is art, not construction.

Discover the answer to the question, “What new way can I touch her that makes her feel even better than I’ve ever made her before?” Do it by asking her to show you with her own hands. If you’ve never watched her body speak before, why would she expect you to already be fluent in her language? Take the time to learn by not being scared about using the wrong word. If you make a mistake, she’ll tell you.

3. The “Rough-And-Tumbler”

Feel like you have something to prove? Maybe you think you’re being aggressive or dominant, strong or sturdy, but getting rough without the clear go-ahead can be scary and can put the person you love in a pretty awkward position.

This kind of attitude tells her that you don’t respect her body or her boundaries. If you tend to “grab-on-tight and don’t-let-go,” it’s time to loosen up and enjoy the If you really want to see how she’s doing, get up close and personal, listen to her heartbeat, the quickness of her breath.

4. “The Hokey Pokey”

Your lover is not a pot roast, you don’t get to “stick a fork in her” to see if she’s done. Poking and prodding, whether trying to elicit a reaction, or determine arousal levels, can only lead to deflated desire. Poking the girls to make them cry stopped being an effective courting technique when you were eight.

Time to give up that juvenile attitude towards your body’s ability to speak the female sex language. A little dance like this sends the clear message that you can’t read her responses and that you are impatient to “get to the point.” If you really want to see how she’s doing, get up close and personal and pay attention to her body language. listen to her heartbeat, the quickness of her breath. Feel the heat of her skin and listen to her voice. If you must ask, just don’t spend more time asking how she’s doing than you do listening to what she’s saying.

Filed Under: Foreplay Tagged With: better sex, female orgasm, fingering, foreplay, orgasm, sex tips

3 Things To Do With Her Clothes During Sex

By loveandsex

Sex tips will definitely spice things up in the bedroom – check out these three simple but super hot ways you can play with your lover’s skivvies during sex!

1. Involve Her Clothes In The Sex

Don’t immediately dismiss them to the floor. It’s not just about the beauty that awaits to be unveiled, it’s also about the beauty of unveiling it. Get the drift?

Run your hands on her clothes, barely touching them. You’re not touching her body, but her apparel. This in itself brings pleasure as you grope through the varied textures & cuts of a woman’s couture. In a way, it’s a good thing she spends half her day choosing the perfect outfit. Sensitize your palms to the feel of cotton, linen, silk and other fabrics. And even when she’s wearing the plainest top and those classic denim jeans, run your hands through. Feel the friction. Doesn’t that feel nice?

Imagine what it will be like for her. She’ll be in a limbo with this hovering hand technique. It feels like you’re touching her, but then again she can’t really be sure. It’s like you’re touching her aura. It’s exciting, but not too intense. (Watch as her breathing gradually quickens.)

After hovering around, gradually apply more pressure and touch her body THROUGH her clothes. Now she can really feel you, she now knows what it means to be held and touched by a man. You’ve set her up so she’ll appreciate and welcome the warmth of your touch.

2.  Spice It Up! Work It!

Being a dull mouse and simply going through the motions of getting your girl naked is a waste of erotic potential.

Add carnal appeal to the proceedings and combine everything you’ve learned so far into a potent & powerful sexual tool. Talk dirty, unleash those naughty looks as you slowly release her body from the restrictions that are her garments. Don’t act all mundane. You might have seen her naked a million times, and it might actually be no big deal, but it doesn’t mean you should take it for granted. Make her feel wanted by lightly kissing the patches of skin you uncover.

And as you strip yourself – put some feeling into it! Nobody cares what ridiculous blob lies beneath your “I’m with Stupid” T-shirt, take it off with erotic appeal – there’s absolutely nothing sexier than confidence.

3. Pause Every Now And Then

Cease your hostilities with fabric and get busy with simpler stuff like kissing. Sometimes it’s good to back-off for a moment, leave her half-naked and recognize that she’s sexiest when she’s ALMOST BARE. There’s that tension again of being naked, but not quite. Of almost being there, but not yet.

Dig up all the sexy calendars you’ve collected over the years. Most ladies in there are not totally naked, they are almost naked, or perhaps covering chest and crotch with their oh-so-lucky palms. Feel the tension this creates. She lets you see the rest of her, but the parts you want the most, she leaves to your imagination. She doesn’t give it all away, always making you want more.

Perfect sexual tension. It’s not always about censorship.

Pause every now and then. Get an eyeful, (but without looking overly impressed.) Notice how incredibly sexy a woman with bare breasts in denim jeans can be. Leave those on and do something else. Caress her face or play with her hair. Don’t worry, those jeans will unzip themselves later.

Filed Under: Sex Tips & Advice Tagged With: better sex, foreplay, seduction, sex tips

How To Get Her To Love Sex Toys

By loveandsex

Sex toys are an excellent way to help women achieve orgasm during sex or by themselves. If you would like for your girlfriend or wife to LOVE using sex toys, there are a few things that you should know. Not all girls are going to be as thrilled about using a butt plug or a vibrator during sex.

Some of them will outright refuse it. However, the vast majority of women are going to embrace the sentiment of expanding their sexual horizon with you and engage in some kinky fun with sex toys if you present it to them properly.

Talk To Her About It

Before you rush off to an adult superstore or jump on your favorite website, talk to your girlfriend or wife about incorporating sex toys into the relationship. There are a lot of girls that would rather change positions or techniques rather than stick some plastic vibrating apparatus into their vagina.

If your girlfriend or wife is hesitant about trying a sex toy, tell that they don’t have to be dirty to have a sex toy. Most girls that are hesitant about using sex toys are embarrassed about their sexuality. Ask them why they do not want to use sex toys and about how sex toys can help them enjoy sex more.

Know Her Limits

You can’t just use any old sex toy on your girl. Make sure that you know her limits and what she is up for. While a girl might be game to use a small vibrator, that doesn’t give you recourse for buying a giant double-dong. Ask the girl what kind of sex toys she has always wanted to try.

Bringing her into the mix is going to increase the chances of a good experience. Chances are that she has always had a fantasy of something. This could be the perfect opportunity for you to learn more about her and what turns her on.

Shop Together

There are sex toys that come all shapes and sizes. Your girlfriend or wife is going to know her body much better than you do. Sure you spend a lot of time down there, but that doesn’t mean that you know big of a vibrator she needs. Remember that you’re not the one that the sex toys are going to be used on.

When you go to the adult store or shop online, do it together. She might have her eye on a g-spot massager where you are going for the clitoral stimulator. Girl’s know their body much more than you do so let her take the lead or at least give you an idea of what she wants before you ever spend any money.

Get Lube

Don’t rely on the girl to get wet just because she is trying something new. Yes, sex toys can exciting and she might not need it, but going to a sex store or even shopping online gives you the opportunity to stock up on a much needed item. Lube can be used for just about everything from sex to a massage. If you see a bottle of lube at the store, pick it up just to be safe. The toy might be a little bigger than she anticipated and that extra bit of lube can make a huge difference in her experience.

Don’t Rely On The Toy

One of the biggest mistakes that you can make is to let up once you have a sex toy. The toy is there to enhance what is already happening, not to replace it. Remember to use a lot of foreplay when you are with your girlfriend or wife. Don’t rely on a vibrator taking her to the edge. You should already know what is going to push her buttons and get her turned on before the sex toy ever comes out.

Let Her Take Control Of The Toy

Yes, you have a new toy and you want to play with it. Slow down though. Just because you want to play with it doesn’t mean that you’re going to know how she likes it. Let her be in charge of the sex toy. If she was a little hesitant to even bring the toy into the bedroom, the last thing that you want to do is have her feel uncomfortable with you poking and prodding at her. Let her do what feels good. Let her give herself an orgasm or two with it. When she’s ready, she will give you the go ahead to start using it on her.

Filed Under: Sex Toys Tagged With: better sex, female orgasm, orgasm, sex tips, Sex Toys, vibrator

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