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Hookup Commandments To Live By

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Sex tips are not just for relationships. These can also cover hookups. Here are the commandments that real men and women are saying you MUST follow in order to avoid awkwardness and still have fun.

What She Said (For Girls)

1.    Thou Shalt Bring Protection

You can buy condoms anywhere and they are super easy to carry around with you. Do it, keep them close at all times. You might also want to bring a small tube of lubricant around with you.

2.    Thou Shalt Get Off

Just because it’s a hook up, and men have been known to wham bam and thank you ma’am, does not mean you can’t “rock, sock and thank you jock.” You have every right to tell him what you need, where you need it and not to stop.  Or climb on top and take matters into your own hands.

Basically just because you are a woman doesn’t mean you can’t get off too. Use sex toys if you have them or if he has them, but remember to put a condom on them.

3.    Thou Shalt Not Leave Anything At His Place

Especially if it is intentional!  If you think that by leaving your earrings or panties etc is a hot move it is not!  Guys see through that.  They think you are either desperate for another romp, or careless. Be discreet, aside from a few scratch marks, you should leave nothing at his place.

4.    Thou Shalt Suggest Breakfast In The Morning

Maybe you know of a great diner near you, or he knows of one near him.  Regardless if the night ended well, why not refuel.  Who knows it might lead to a little afternoon delight.

5.    Thou Shalt Not Be Forced To Cuddle

If you are staying over, or he is staying at your place cuddling is not a given.  You should not feel obligated to be the little spoon nor should you feel that he should spoon you. Sleep how you would if you were alone, but seeing how you two just shared fluids, you should make sure you share the covers.

6.    Thou Shalt Not Expect A Relationship

Sometimes hook ups end up being more, sometimes they are all they need to be. Either way, enjoy the moment and don’t expect anything out of it.

7.    Thou Shalt Make Sure He Is Single

Don’t be that girl!  Even if you don’t know his girlfriend, respect their relationship.  I don’t care how hot the guy may be, he is obviously a scumbag if he is ok with cheating.

8.    Thou Shalt Have A Morning After Outfit

Keep an extra pair of jeans, t-shirt and shoes in your car.  When you are in casual clothes, the walk of shame becomes just a walk.

What He Said (For Guys)

1. Thou Shalt Text The Morning After, No Matter What

It doesn’t matter if you regret it. Or if it was bad, or if it was good, but you never want to see that person again. You should always aspire to leave someone better than you found them in all circumstances. Hooking up is no different.

The morning after text, if you will, is part of that. Being used in a fun way is one thing, but just plain being used is not fun. This is especially important for guys to remember.

For women, sex is a choice, for guys it’s a chore. If you leave this girl on bad terms, you’re not messing it up for yourself, you’re messing it up for every guy that will come after you. So be classy and master the art of the dismount. Or none of us will get laid ever again.

2. Thou Shalt Be Realistic

This is basically just sex, and by basically, I mean totally. It’s not a romantic comedy. It’s not going to lead to a wonderful romance with the person of your dreams, at least it’s not likely too. You want some ass, they want some ass and then you can both meet in the middle.

Don’t get all Oprah on them. Don’t’ ask about their puppies or their childhood or what they like to do when they’re not having sex with you. They don’t care about your background and you shouldn’t about theirs.

3. Thou Shalt Not Worry About Them Getting Theirs

One of the nicest things about hooking up is that there’s no pretense about it. You don’t have to pretend to care about them, or their feelings, or whether they get off. Get yours and getting theirs is their problem.

4. Thou Shalt Think Of This As Batting Practice

You may not care about the person you’re banging randomly, but there will come a time when you meet someone you really do care about and maybe even love. You might want to spend the rest of your life with them.

Stripper Lies To Watch Out For (If You Want A One-Night Stand With One)

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A stripper will tell you just about anything to get your money – but if you want to take one home with you, you’ve got to watch out for these untruths!

“I Just Started Working Here A Few Nights Ago”

This is the most common stripper lie. It plays on our psychology; guys get excited and think they have a “chance” to score with a stripper (and possibly have sex with her) when they find out she’s new and isn’t jaded and all about making money. Then what happens is the customer spends money on her, thinking it will impress her and she’ll go home with him. She won’t, and she’ll have made hundreds of dollars from spinning her lies, just like she planned on.

I once met a very cute stripper who told me she’d just started working at the club “last night.” (This was before I learned how the game was played.) I figured it was my lucky day: I’d met a girl who was new, fresh, and was probably more “real” than the other girls – which meant I might have a chance at dating her.

(I didn’t, although I did blow a hundred bucks on dances that night.)

Fast-forward eight months. I came back to the strip club and she sat down with me again. (She had no recollection of ever meeting me.) When I asked her how long she’d been working at the club, she told me she’d just started two days ago. And I’m sure that to this day, she’s still feeding customers this line of crap.

This is a typical stripper ploy, to make you think she’s innocent and fresh—not like the other girls. And it’s all calculated, of course, to make you lower your guard and spend money on her.

If you hear this from a stripper, don’t try to challenge her on it. Just nod, smile, and say “Oh, well I hope its going okay so far,” and then move the conversation onto something else—knowing that you’ve just deflected an attempt to hustle you.

“I’m Having A Bad Night, I Haven’t Even Paid Off My Stage Fee. Could You Cover It For Me?”

Dancers are normally required to pay the club a “stage fee” or a “house fee” every time they work a shift. If business is slow, or there’s a ton of competition from other dancers, it’s possible for a stripper to wind up losing money on a shift, when you also factor in the tips she needs to pay out to the support staff.

However, when you hear this from a stripper, it’s usually an attempt to gain sympathy and get you to fork over some money. The average guy might think, “Sure, why not just cover her $75 stage fee? I’ll be a hero and she’ll have to repay me somehow, maybe by going on a date!” But remember, this is a ploy to get your money. When you run out of money, she won’t think twice about moving on to another customer.

Other lies they’ll tell you: You can bet money that they have a great story about why they became strippers. These stories always involve some (if not all) of the following terms: “My boyfriend,” “My ex-boyfriend,” “Prison,” “Hospital,” “Just moved,” and my personal favorite, “Hooters girls don’t really make that much money.”

10 Signs He’s Using You

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Relationship advice is something you need to pay attention to if you suspect that your man is taking advantage of you. Is it true? Find out now!

Being used can be devastating to the ego and your self-esteem. If you’re in a relationship –whether budding or established and you thin that he might be taking advantage of you, you’re probably right. There are a lot of reasons that men use women. Sex is the one that most women think of, but there are others. Men cherish their self-image and having a great looking girl by their side is one of the biggest statements he can make while in public. A beautiful woman is a sign of success and power. This is a coveted feature of any man’s life, but he may only have superficial interest in you.

1. You Can Tell That He Doesn’t Really Care

Does he ask how your day was when you walk through the door? If he does, can you tell that he’s actually interested in what you did for the last 12 hours of your life? If you sense disinterest in your work, your family or your passions, he’s probably taking advantage of you. A guy that takes a genuine interest in all of these aspects is going to respect you and really care about what is going on.

2. He’s Uncompromising

When it comes to making a choice about dinner plans or going to see a movie, does he take an interest in what you want to do? If not, he’s definitely taking advantage of you or he’s a sociopath. Neither of these is good and you should probably move on. You want a man that is going to compromise with what you want and what he wants to do.

3. He’s Cold Out Of The Bedroom

If things are frigid unless you’re under the sheets, you can bet your bottom dollar that he’s wants you for sex. A man that is genuinely affectionate outside of the bedroom and in public can’t help but to show how much he cares about you. Ditch one that is only interested in a connection in the bedroom.

4. He Doesn’t Make You Feel Special

A guy that really cares about you is going to show that you’re the only girl on his mind. If you’re dating a fella that buys you generic gifts on your birthday or blows you off to spend time with his friends, he probably wants you as a backup plan. Get rid of him and get with one that will make you feel like the only girl he’s thinking about.

5. He’s Not Concerned With The Future

No man should ever talk about marriage within the first couple of months, but if your guy isn’t talking about taking trips or possible future plans, he’s probably taking advantage of you. Men that are genuinely interested in a long-term relationship will want to make the appropriate comments signaling this interest. If your man is not talking about the future, you need to ask him if he wants a long-term commitment.

6. He Doesn’t Text Or Call You Back

If you send a text to your guy, what is his typical response time? Does he apologize if he doesn’t respond in a timely manner? If he takes a day or two to get back to you, he’s probably taking advantage of you. Men that are interested won’t leave you hanging.

7. You’ve Only Been On One Date

This is a huge red flag. If the only date that you’ve gone on was the first date, you can be fairly sure that he’s just taking advantage of you. Even if you’re not sleeping with him, he probably just wants you as somebody to hang out with when he has nothing else to do. Traditionally, men want to wine and dine women so be on the lookout for a man that has no interest in taking you on a proper date.

8. He’s Disrespectful

A man should always treat a lady as a lady. If he is disrespectful to you, he just wants you until you hit the breaking point. No man should ever treat a woman as anything other than an equal. Remember this the next time he makes a disrespectful remark.

9. He Hasn’t Introduced You To His Family

If you have only been dating for a couple of weeks, you can let this one slide. But if you have been together for a couple of months and you still haven’t met his parents, there is something else going on. A man wants to have the approval of his parents. Dump him if he refuses to introduce you to his parents.

10. He Doesn’t Want To Meet Your Family

If he avoids meeting your family, this is another red flag. Meeting your family is a big deal. Looking your father in the eye while he inquires about his intentions with you is a staple of every relationship. If your guy refused to meet your family, it’s time to move on.

Am I A Slut Or Just Progressive?

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“Slut” – you’ve heard the word. You know what it means. But are you really ones, or are you embracing your sexuality? What makes a woman one anyways?

Most women are very concerned with their self-image. Although self-image can directly affect ego and self-esteem, we don’t always make the right decisions to support how we really think of ourselves. The days of women hiding their sexual prowess are over. Society has embraced the concept that women like sex and can get it whenever they want. But when does being a forward woman who loves sex turn into a woman who is after only one thing? If your friends have ever called you by that name, you know how damaging this word can be. The line between being a woman who embraces her sexuality and a complete slut is not as fine as you may think. Here are a few questions to ponder when determining if you are one or not.

Have You Ever Had A One-Night Stand?

One night stands can be a lot of fun if both parties understand that is simply “is what it is.” But if you’ve had more than 5, you’re teetering on the line of being a slut. If you have never had a one-night stand then you probably aren’t a slut. Almost every woman has had one compromising night in her life. It’s not the end of the world and it certainly doesn’t brand you with The Scarlet Letter. Most women who have had a single one-night stand regret it or look back and laugh. This is normal and you shouldn’t get bogged down with it.

Workplace Romances

The workplace is for work. If you have ever had a workplace romance, you might want to consider closing your legs in the future. Sleeping with a guy that you work with has its appeals. Because it’s heavily frowned upon, the thought can be exciting. Flirting with a guy at work endangers your professionalism. If you have just flirted with a guy at work then you’re probably in the clear. If you have engaged in a sexual relationship with a guy at work then you could just be a slut. Women who enjoy their sexuality progressively are professional women. They don’t mix work and play. Giving into the urges of a workplace relationship could be the sign that you’re looking for.

Your “Number”

Although your number is not the only factor in determining whether or not you’re a slut, it does play its part. Typically, a woman in her early 30’s should not have more than 10-11 guys on her bedpost. If you have more than that then you could possibly be one. If you have 20 or more guys under your belt, you are one. The general rule is that you should not be with more than 3 guys per year. If you’re with more than 3 guys per year, you’re probably not engaging in loving relationships. Take a step back and look at the relationships that you have been in over the last couple of years.

Would You Date The Ex Of A Friend?

This one is kind of tricky. Sure, your friend dated some guy while you were in college. But she’s married now with kids, so what’s wrong with dating him? In this specific scenario, there’s nothing wrong with going out with the guy. If your friend and their ex broke up 2 months ago and you’re all set to date him, then you’re just a slut. The exes of friends are not the best guys to go after in the first place because it puts a stain on your friendship. Your friend may not be comfortable with you being where they have been. If you would never even parish the thought, then you’re not one.

Your Average Saturday Night

What is your average Saturday night like? Do you hang around the house in sweats catching up on recorded shows or are you out at the latest clubs trolling for guys to have a cheap thrill with? Going out on a Saturday night is not an indicator of a “lady of the evening,” but your intentions can be. Heading out to a bar with a couple of friends and checking out some of the guys can be harmless. If you seem to always find yourself in a cab with Joe Nobody after last call…well, you can guess where this is going.

A good girl will not always get the guy, but a slut will never be taken seriously. If you are afraid that you’re crossing the line between being a forward thinking woman and a slut, you should rethink your life path. It’s okay for women to like sex and might even have a tryst once in a while, and this doesn’t mean that they are bad. However, a true slut will fail every aspect of these scenarios. Be honest with yourself and you will get a true gauge of what you are and how you can change.

5 Signs He Only Wants A One Night Stand

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A one night stand can be fun, but only if you’re in on it and okay with it. Here are 5 indicators he might only want a one night stand, so you can steer clear.

A one-night stand can be one of the biggest mistakes for a woman’s life. Let’s face it. Some men will do anything to get into a girl’s pants. If a fella has ever played you, you know how stupid you can feel afterward. Being able to tell if a guy is looking for a one-night stand or a real relationship is a huge asset for the nightlife scene in your area. There are several indicators that you can take into account when determining whether or he wants a one-night stand. Here is a guide to keep the creeps away.

1. He Buys You Drinks…A Lot Of Drinks

A date that is only looking for a one stand is going to buy you a lot of drinks. He will probably be drinking a lot also so this is something that you will need to look out for. Men that buy a lot of drinks for women are trying to get them loose and ready for whatever. The release of inhibitions associated with alcohol is a staple among one night stands. Refuse the drinks that he is offering your and see what he says. If he starts teasing you about being a lightweight, he probably just wants a one night stand. If he lets up and doesn’t push the drinks on you, he might be looking for a more serious relationship.

2. The Conversation Always Comes Back To The Same Thing

When you’re talking to a guy he should be telling you about himself. This could include what he does, what he likes, if he’s there with friends or where he went to school. Men that want one night stands typically sexualize the situation right off the bat. If you are talking and he keeps coming back to his car, his condo, his job title or any other phallic metaphor it’s probably best to leave the situation as is. Any fella that mentions sex within the first 20 minutes of meeting him is not looking for a serious relationship.

3. He’s Trying To “Bounce” You

Women tend to stay in packs. If you are out with a bunch of girlfriends and a potential date tries to get you away from them, he’s looking for a one-night stand. Here’s the reasoning. Women don’t want to be judged by their friends. A girl that goes to another club or a different bar with a guy they just met is less of an offense than a girl that goes home with a guy right in front of their friends. Men know this so they try to separate the girl from her friends.

When the two of you walk into a new bar or club together everybody will think that you’re a couple. This eliminates the chances of another guy hitting on you, leaving you as a victim to his routine. If he says something like “Hey, it’s kind of loud in here. Can we go outside and talk for a bit?” He’s probably not looking for a one-night stand. Bouncing is a very common practice in the “Pick-Up Artist” world.

4. He Doesn’t Want To Meet Your Friends

A huge tell for a guy that only wants a one-night stand is when they don’t want to meet your friends. When you’re in a bar or a club with friends, the guy should want their approval. A potential date that is interested in you and your life will want to meet your friends so they can put in a good word for him. For a guy wanting a one night stand, your friends are obstacles that could get in his way. They will try to keep you away from your friends for as long as possible and then make an excuse of why they don’t want to meet them. They might say something like “I need another drink” or “Let me run to bathroom real quick.”

5. He Doesn’t Ask For Your Number

If you really want to know whether the guy is looking for a one night stand, the best way to do it is to play the game yourself. Pretend that you and your friends are leaving the bar. Even if you’re not leaving the bar you can say “we changed our mind.” If the guy does not ask for your number before you leave, he’s only looking for a one-night stand. Men don’t want to be perceived as players by the rest of the girls in the bar. When he takes your number, other girls are going to be uninterested. This messes up his persona and he won’t risk it on a girl that is leaving.