Love & Sex Answers

Today's #1 Love & Sex Resource

You are here: Home / Archives for foreplay

Keep These Foreplay Tips In Mind When Pleasing Your Girl Sexually!

By

Foreplay isn’t always easy – use these easy suggestions in mind when engaging in foreplay with your lover to give her the most amazing orgasms!

Because you are entering the “full sex zone,” you will need to make sure you know just how to please your lady sexually. The more you go out of your way to ensure a pleasurable sexual experience the better. The following are some important tips to use for the sake of your lady’s sexual experience.

What Foreplay Is All About

When it comes to foreplay, think Monopoly: Before you can pass go and collect your $200, you have to make your way around the board (and hope you don’t get sent to jail along the way). So when it comes to your woman, don’t even think about touching her vagina or her breasts until you’ve made your way across her neck, breasts, stomach, thighs, and other less-intimate portions of her body.

When you do make your way to her vagina, if she’s not already wet, then lubricate the area with some personal lubricant or your own saliva. Once she’s fully aroused, her natural lubricant should kick in and make the vagina moist. However, this depends a lot on her age and what part of her menstrual cycle she’s in. So always be ready to apply your own lubricant if needed. Remember: do not use the massage oil as lubricant!

Also make sure to apply the three golden rules: Be gentle, go slow, and have a steady rhythm. Having a steady rhythm over a lengthy period of time (even if your touch isn’t perfect), will do you better than switching back and forth from one technique to another. Although she can slow down, speed up, and even stop to tease you, doing the same to her might just frustrate her enough to want to close up shop.

Fingering

Many women enjoy being penetrated with a finger (those fingernails need to be trimmed). Be sure to start with one finger and don’t add another until her vagina becomes more receptive through her arousal. Move your finger in and out of the vagina very gently. If your lady likes it deep and hard, be sure to do it slowly. Her vagina will be wet inside, so be sure to apply lubricant to her clitoris. Continue stimulating the clitoris while you penetrate her with your finger, dipping it in and out.

Many times you might find you have one hand working the inside of her vagina with your other hand stimulating the clitoris. However, when you have one hand free, use it to stimulate her nipples.

Many women thoroughly enjoy having their clitoris stimulated with the head of their man’s erect penis—a very sexy alternative, so keep this in mind!

Also know that when a woman is on the verge of having an orgasm, she will often grow very still, her body dramatically tense, butt cheeks tightly clenched, and as quiet as a mouse. This is the most crucial point, so it’s imperative that you continue doing what you were doing. Don’t stop or change a thing! While she’s coming, continue going but slow things down and ease up on the pressure just a bit. She’ll push you away when she gets to a point where she can’t take it any more.

Mistakes You Don’t Want To Make

Knowing how to provide your partner with a pleasurable sexual experience is one thing. But just as important is to know what can turn a good thing down the wrong road. The following are some common mistakes that men make.

  • You’re too rough. Regardless of age, being too rough is the #1 complaint among women when it comes to men.
  • You don’t read her body language and get offended when she tries to guide you. Look—it doesn’t matter how many women you’ve had, every woman is different. So if your woman guides you, don’t take it as criticism. She’s simply teaching you what she likes. When it comes to her body language, if she’s pressing against you, it means she wants you to apply more pressure. When she pulls away, it means she wants you to ease up and be gentle.
  • Inconsistent rhythm. Just as she’s climbing her way to an orgasm, you change your technique, sending her sliding back down to the bottom.
  • You rush and penetrate her with your fingers too soon. Be sure to stimulate the lips and clitoris first.
  • You stop at the worst possible moment. A woman’s orgasm tends to last longer than a man’s. Even when you think your lady is done, she could still be climaxing. If you stop what you’re doing when she’s still climaxing, her orgasm will continue but it will not be anywhere near as pleasurable and cause her to feel horribly robbed.

So keeping all of the above in mind, let’s explore the many pleasures of erotic massage techniques and really get her fire going!

Best Foreplay Secrets Of 2011

By

Foreplay is essential for awesome sex for both guys and gals. If you skip the foreplay stage, or go through it too quickly, you’re going to have mediocre sex at best. If you want really explosive, orgasmic sex, you’re going to have to spend plenty of time teasing each other into a frenzy! Learn the most incredible foreplay tips of the whole year here!

Don’t forget to take a look at our all time favorite foreplay articles! Some of our best articles will teach guys how to turn a girl on and get her craving you without ever laying a hand on her and will teach women how to drive their guys absolutely crazy with desire before sex! If you really want to revive your sex life and make it hotter than ever before, you don’t want to miss reading these articles!

We’ve also spent some time this year working on finding you the BEST foreplay resources out there, so check out what we’ve found and find out which ones are worth getting!

  • Double Her Desire (a great resource on how to get your female lover turned on more than ever!)
  • Turn Her On Faster (learn how to get her turned on faster so you can both enjoy sex sooner)
  • Erotic Massage For Better Sex (learn the art of sensual erotic massage and she’ll be PUTTY in your hands! This one really is a keeper!)

 

 

How To Romance Her Before Giving Her Oral Sex

By

Romance is important for a woman during sex – especially during oral sex, because it gets lonely up there all by herself. Here’s how to up the romance factor.

No, we’re not talking about the obvious here. We’re talking about mental differences between men and woman and that is generally considered to be the biggest one. Specifically, we’re referring to the different ways men and women get turned on. Men are visual creatures and this is why the pornography industry brings in billions of dollars per year. Just the sight of a large pair of soft, bouncy breasts can get a man turned on in a millisecond. This is not so with women. Very, very rarely a woman is turned on by something (or someone) she sees. For women, it is mostly mental. A steamy novel will get her juices flowing before any film or movie will.

It is time for you to learn to take advantage of this knowledge and apply it to your cunnilingus technique. Yes, we’d like for you to think of getting her mentally turned on as part of your technique, so you never forget to do it. How do you get a woman mentally turned on? Romance. No, don’t cringe!

Men couldn’t care less about romantic dinners, flowers or any of the like but women can go from zero to hot and horny with these simple gestures. If you’ve been married for years and a romantic dinner doesn’t seem up your alley, this is where you can use your imagination. What would be romantic for the two of you? It can be something like an elaborate gift or a simple compliment. Most guys can’t grab this stuff off the top off their head though, so we’ve got a few ideas for you.

Erotic Massage

With erotic massage, you can kill two birds with one stone. If you’re not skilled with your hands in that area, book her an appointment with a professional masseuse. You’ll get the gift-giving bonus too! Women love massages – not only does it relax them, it makes their responsibilities melt away and as a result, they feel loved and cared for.

Thoughtful Gifts

These can be large or small, but they must be thoughtful, not generic! Getting her that new can opener (even though she’s complained about the old one for weeks and desperately needs a new one) will not do the job here! So let’s make a rule of thumb – if you’re getting her a gift, don’t get anything that can even remotely be construed as practical! Although it may seem a waste of money to you, it makes your partner feel truly special. Jewelry, Bath & Body Works goodies, comfortable sleepwear, the delicious perfume she’s been eyeing flowers, etc. are all great ideas.

If you do choose to get her flowers, don’t get her a plant! Even though flowers will die in a few days, a plant is just another thing she’ll have to take care of and in time will become a hassle (unless she absolutely loves plants).

Dinner (No, This Is Not As Cliche As You Think)

Whether you take her out, bring dinner home or cook for her, letting her forget about what to put on the table when she gets home from work can do wonders for her sexual mood! Make an effort to eat with her at the dinner table if this is something you don’t normally do – the idea here is to spend time with her and enjoy being in her presence during an every day activity. You can also turn this idea into anything, such as going bowling together, taking a walk in a nearby park or just a quiet drive to the ice cream parlor on a hot summer evening. Your time is valuable to her and is probably better than any gift you could give.

Chores

Believe it or not, chores are to women what lingerie is to men. Nothing will romance a woman and get her more instantly turned on and inclined toward her partner than if he were to do a few chores without being asked! Yes, we said without being asked. It will only take a few minutes of your time (such as taking out the trash or doing the dishes) but here again; the idea is to lighten your lady’s load. In doing so, she will not have much on her mind except what you’ll be doing to her next or the orgasm you’re going to give her.

Be Original

If you’re unsure about how to mentally get her in the mood and romance her, just follow this simple rule: break her out of her daily routine. It is that daily grind that gets women so worn down that they are turned off or “not in the mood.” If you can lessen that or break her out of it (even for a short time), you will most likely succeed in getting her mentally turned on.

Why He Doesn’t Want To Have Sex With You

By

You want to have sex and he doesn’t. You’re all over him, and he obviously looks like he would rather be doing something else – or at the very least, just not into what you’re doing. Why? You’re butt naked (or even wearing lingerie) and totally smokin’ hot – but he doesn’t seem to desire to have sex at all. How frustrating! What does it mean when he won’t have sex with you? Is there something wrong with you?

Not exactly. Yes, you could be contributing to his not wanting to do it right at that point in time, but there are also some other reasons that he might not want to have sex that are totally beyond your control. Here’s why he might not want to do it when you initiate it:

Lack Of Foreplay

While men often get the reputation of being able to get hard and ready for sex in seconds, this is not always the case. Men actually require foreplay too before they have sex (that is, if they want to get into it at all), although usually not as much as women do.

If you try to get it on with a guy before he’s had enough time during foreplay to get really aroused, you’re going to end up with one of two things – a guy with a semi hard on, or a guy who wants his and wants to get back to what he was doing before. This isn’t really a win-win for either of you. So make sure to include plenty of foreplay in your sex routine, before you ever get started. Oral sex is a great way to do this – often, just a ten minute blowjob will get him warmed up and aroused enough to really want to have sex.

Lack Of Interest On Your Part

A man doesn’t want to have sex with a blow up doll. Or a robot. If he wanted that, he could just go buy a blow up doll. If he’s even remotely interested in sex and makes a move – and you’re not interested or enthusiastic at all – he’ll lose his desire pretty quick. That may leave you wondering what’s going on, especially if you’ve been faking orgasm. A lot of guys can smell a fake from a mile away and that will turn him off faster than if you were dressed like his mother.

Whether he makes the first move or you do, make sure you show lots of interest in him and what is going on. Don’t be distracted by the television, the computer or your phone. In fact, shut all those things off and show your man that you want to pay attention to him and only him. This will get him perked up pretty much right away and as he sees you continue to be really interested in getting it on with him (especially if you’re one of those women who really enjoys giving your man pleasure), he’ll get more and more into it himself.

He’s Not Turned On

It happens to women all the time – even really hot women. For example, he’s watching the game and you bring him a beer. You notice that he has an erection. Your ass looks particularly fine in your jeans today, so it must be that. Or maybe it’s the seductive look you gave him when you sauntered in to where he is sitting. You hone in on him to get things started and he looks at you like you’ve lost your marbles. What? He’s got an erection! Doesn’t that mean he wants to have sex? Not always.

Just because he’s hard doesn’t mean that he’s actually turned on or that he wants sex right at that moment. Sometimes, his penis gets hard on its own, really for no reason at all. This happens throughout the day, but especially at night while he’s sleeping. So you may misread his erection as being turned on, when really, it’s just his body going on about it’s natural business.

So instead of feeling rejected next time you spring on him and he’s just not into it (despite the physical clues that he does), chalk it up to one of those random hard-ons and find something else to do. Try again when he’s relaxed and bring on the foreplay. Take your time, show him you really want him and let things take their natural course. With some effort on your part, it won’t be long before he changes his tune.

Do NOT Make These 4 Sex Mistakes!

By

Sex tips can help you avoid leading your sex life into a rut. Pay attention to these sex tips and DON’T make these bedroom faux pas!

It will come as a shock for those who think that it’s the guys who are willing to move heaven and earth just so women consider kinky stuff. Apparently, women believe guys are too boxed and set in their ways. Bedroom events have become fairly standard, easily predictable and therefore boring. It’s the same old stuff!

1. Always Doing The Same Thing

This ‘same old stuff’ happens to be the “foreplay, then penetration, then ejaculation” sequence – which has been regarded by many as the divine definition of sex. For most, this has been the way to go…the only way to go. It’s been so ingrained in the way we operate we don’t even notice. And if you’re thinking, “Well, because it’s just the way things are!” You are also not alone in that thought.

But FPE is just one of the ways. There’s clearly nothing wrong with it, but it’s not the only recipe for bliss. For example, you can leave out 1 element in the sequence and still have an awesome time. You can skip foreplay, for example, and still have great sex (uhhh, Quickies hello!) You also don’t need to penetrate every time, because sometimes, getting head is enough. And ejaculation doesn’t signal any end, you can treat it as if nothing happened.

2. It’s No Fun

Did you know that sex can be spontaneous, festive and FUN?

I bet you know that already. Still, many act as if they’re apprenticing to become masters of bedroom boredom. They get serious, silent and so intent on cashing-in those orgasms.

But when you really think about it, when it comes to sex, WOMEN SIMPLY WANT TO HAVE A GOOD TIME. Girls just want to have fun. That’s what it all boils down to.

As an avenue for good time and feeling good, sex need not be raw all the time, it need not be serious or heavy. You can be highly playful, allow your imagination to have a field day and have lots of laughter with your partner.

Sex is not a dead-end job, so quit being grave and bring that FUN FACTOR into bed. Bring a whole lot of horny, but don’t forget to bring a whole lot of fun.

3. It’s Too Impersonal

The You Factor – let it shine – that’s what makes sex with you unique.

It’s your distinguishing mark.

Bring in those emotions, sense of humor, sense of adventure, yes, even naivete. Don’t leave that guy out – he was fun! Your personality is one of the most compelling excuse she’s in bed with you (besides the fact that she’s married to you). Don’t fool yourself, you’re not that hot.

Sex needs a personal touch. Unfortunately, many guys have unconsciously objectified their partners and have depersonalized sex as a series of EVENTS. Women on the other hand focus on the PERSON. Can you sense the dissonance of genders here? Women focus on the person, men see the object and the event.

4. Doing It With A “Thing”

Is intercourse with a SEX OBJECT different? Does calling her ‘a piece of ass,’ ‘a piece of meat’ or reducing her to a cup size or a hair color, affect the resulting sex?

You bet it does, every last bit of it! For it clearly matters if you think your partner is a woman or a masturbation sleeve.

People don’t give squat about objects, we USE them, and their sole purpose is to delight our erotic whims. We don’t care about feelings, because objects don’t have feelings. It won’t matter if we serve them a lifetime supply of lame sex – they’re objects!

There is another PERSON (not thing) in the sexual act. It is very, very important that you treat the body next to you as a person and avoid treating a woman like a “thing.” Well, not because you’re a gentleman – not really. This is more for your sake than hers.